When I asked my friend to read the prologue, her comment was that people might not react to it that positively. So of course, I was shocked to find out that people were actually intrigued by it. Thank you for the Faves and the reviews. Very much appreciated. Enjoy the next chapter.
Most people think that I'm a sociopath. I feel nothing but I am more than skilled at manipulating and directing other's feelings. However, contrary to popular belief, I am human. And, I'm very much humanly "head over combat boots" in love with Clint Francis Barton. Frankly it terrifies me and pisses me off at the same time. You see, I was programmed to be cold hearted, emotionless and to be this attached to another human being was strange and confusing. It also made me do all sorts of things, like getting shot in the gut, for example.
The bullet was originally destined for Clint's heart.
You see, my idiot partner decided that I couldn't hold off some ninja wannabes on my own and decided to leave his nest and fight on the ground with me. At that point there were only ten guys left which meant that I would have been done in a couple of minutes without his help. So of course, I got mad at him and of course, we ended up fighting, like always. He was too caught up trying to justify his doubt about my capability to perform excellently that he didn't notice that that last guy that he supposedly took out was very much conscious and had a gun in his hand. So of course, the idiot of an archer ended up with a bullet headed straight for his heart. And well, I happened to notice it and managed to somehow knock him to the ground and take the bullet instead. Did I mention that Clint Barton is the world's biggest idiot?
Well, he is. Because if he wasn't so impulsive and so quick to doubt my abilities, I wouldn't have had to take a bullet for him. And if he wasn't such an idiot, I wouldn't have had to turn into a cliche. Because let's face it people, this was probably the most clichéd thing I've ever done: taking a bullet for the man who probably would didn't care as much for me as I did just because I loved him. I hate being stereotyped and here I was, a living, aching proof it.
The worse part was that the pain, and every excruciating second I had to put up with it (I think the goon managed to nick one of my major organs), was making me drop my usual defenses and become scarily unguarded. So here I was, on the ground, bleeding out and suddenly there's heat creeping up my face as the guy I'm supposed to be mad at for his stupidity, is suddenly gently cradling me and looking absolutely terrified. Not only that, it was taking more than the usual effort needed to suppress the sigh of pleasure that was aching to escape my lips at the feel of his fingers running through my hair and stroking my cheek.
And this was when the mother of all humiliating things an unguarded Natasha Romanoff does happens. When Clint furiously asks me why I foolishly took the bullet meant for him, I answer, "Because, I love you."
The lulling darkness starts to cocoon me when suddenly, I am jolted into lucidity by a sharp pain. I look up to see Clint, his body tense, one of his hands (the one applying pressure to the wound), digging in deeper than was comfortable. Hence, the pain.
It was at this point that what I just said dawned on me. And my eyes dart up to his face once again only to see his shocked face and his unnerving lack of retorts. Thankfully, that mortifying discovery was enough to make me faint. Normally I would have killed myself before I got caught fainting; but, seeing as I just told THE guy that I was basically in love with him, this form of escape was blissfully welcomed.
Sometimes I wonder if I have a death wish. And every time this train of thought enters my mind, I dismiss it. But today, I might just have to say that yes, I do have a death wish. Not because I just took a bullet for a guy. But because after what I just said, there was no way my heart was going to come out of this unscathed.
Especially with the way Clint reacted to that unguarded confession.
I'm sorry. I know the taking a bullet for another person thing is soooo cliched. But it served it's purpose and well, I can't concoct crazy theories and scenarios as well as Richard Castle can so, forgive me for using that plot line.