A/N: a thank big thank you to Voodooman, thank you for your alerts. I think it's a great honor especially since I love your Caroline/Dean stories! And to prettygal456 thank you both so much! Also I just found out that my story December Storm is in a community! Excuse me while I squeal with joy…but enough is enough onto the next installment of Beautiful Lies. This one is going to be a bit sad and a bit happy I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoy writing it…seriously this is really fun!
Suggested Listening: Blackout by Breath Carolina
/And I'm on my knees/
She is not expecting it when it happens, and there is a small part of her brain wondering why that is. All they have had is ups, there was bound to be a crashing down eventually. Its night when it happens and she walking about the upper levels of the house, her bare feet slapping against the wooden floors. She is still on cloud nine from -whatever this was between them- this morning. He had kissed her! And well done a great deal of other things, smiling at the memory of his blue eyes looking down at her, as if he was searching her soul.
She was also experiencing a pang of insecurity. She was a monster and went to purgatory, he was an angel and not a small part of her thought she was just deluding herself. How could things ever work out between them, she was a creature of the night, he walked in the day in the light of God? How can I ever measure up to that? "Caroline my dear." he murmured walking up to her. He sounded calm, but the frantic look in his eyes belied that. He gripped her by her upper arms, his eyes locking onto hers with laser focus. "Balthazar…what is it?" she ask her hands coming to rest on his forearm.
He looked around them as if he was expecting someone to just jump out, and throw a net around them. "I need you…I need you to do something for me." of course she would do anything for him and she told him so. "I need you to lock yourself in your room and stay put." except that. "Why what's wrong?" He wouldn't explain, just popped them into her room closing the door behind him, as he left and then locked it. She ran towards it her fists beating down on the wood. "Balthazar!" she hollered, pounding the door, completely confused on why he would do this. "Let me out!" he was still there, still standing on the other side of the door. She could still sense him, still smell him. She could smell his confusion mingled with fear, but she had no clue where it was coming from. "I'm sorry darling but this is for your own good." She growled in frustration, what was for her own good, what the hell was he talking about! "This isn't your fight." with that he left her banging against the door, screaming his name. The asshole!
Dean looked at his friend Cass and his brother it had been a long road getting here a road that included finding out that angel's trade in souls -who knew- and that Cass, could actually bring himself to torture someone. However, they were here now at the compound of an angel that was supposed to be dead, but was alive. "Here you'll need this." Cass says handing them each an angel-killing blade. "Do you expect that much trouble?" Sam asks eyeing the blade he held loosely in his hand. "With Raphael and Balthazar?" Cass asks to himself mostly.
The angel shrugs his shoulders before answering. "One never knows." Dean rolls his eyes; the damn angel could be a bit frustrating at times. Cass gives the distraction as they battle their way through, it wasn't so bad, and angels are only a little harder to kill than demons. Just a bit brighter. He was first to make it into the compound, Sam right behind him. He looks around for a moment because seriously if he thought the place was mega watt, before its much more on the inside. "Hello are you looking for someone?" Dean spun around and saw Raphael standing there his blank face, still managing to look smug. Therefore, Dean being Dean answered in kind. "Yeah dick with wings. What's it to you?"
Raphael's laugh was deep and menacing, but it didn't bother him much he faced hell loosing Sam and so many others, and had come out on the other side with most of his sanity in tact. "Oh just…well never mind, simian you will find out soon enough." Dean looked at Sam for answers but his brother looked as confused as he felt. Cass tried sneaking up behind Raphael, the angel blade held high ready to strike, so they had to keep the dark skinned angel occupied for the time being. "I don't know why he acts like he has some being secret." Sam murmured shaking his head acting like this conversation wasn't weird enough. Like it was something normal.
"I mean what could he possibly know?" Dean cast his eyes toward the smug angel. He is not sure what he knows, but it was something. He could see it burning deep within the dark chocolate eyes. Cass was close enough know and moved to strike but Raphael turned in a swift movement and sent Cass flying into the staircase. With his other hand, he kept Dean and Sam in place. "You know Raphael, it isn't nice to come into someone's home, and throw around people he cares about." while keeping the three of the pinned to the spot, Raphael turned slowly. "Balthazar…" the dick angel murmured slyly, "how is your…guest?" The new comer stopped short his blue eyes going guarded. "I suggest you let my brother and his friends go." Raphael laughed short and ominous. "Maybe I should tell them about her. Shall I? They will find out soon enough, and they won't be pleased. You know what they do to people that piss them off."
With a frustrated grunt, Caroline kicked the door sending chunks of it flying. She planted her hands on hips and tried to formulate a plan. She had to get out of here, had to help him…somehow. Granted she had no clue what was going on down stairs all she could hear were the muffled sounds of a fight. She tilted her head back smelling the air around her. She could smell two more angels and…was that…there were humans here. Running over to her closet, she pulled out a pair of pants and grabbed socks from the drawer. Roughly pulling on the pants, she hopped around on one foot while pulling on the socks. Once she was done, she grabbed her boots and put those on as well.
Dressed in jeans and still wearing Balthazar's shirt and jacket she put her fist through the door cringing as the wood pierced her skin. Sighing when the door still wouldn't budge, she rammed it with her shoulder and almost went flying from the force of her impact. She regained her composer and ran for the railing, looking down on the lower level she saw a man with dark hair being held down to the ground by a dark skinned man. However, everything changed to fast, one minute the man with eyes the color of an azure sea, was looking up at her -almost as if he knew her- then the man holding him turned into a pile, of what looked like salt.
Balthazar was agitated more so than usual, moving a little more to the left she could see more of the foyer, saw him surrounded by a ring of fire. She saw red. Not caring one wit about what could happen to her; she threw herself over the railing and landed just inches away from him and the fire. She landed in a crouch graceful as a cat; she eyed the three strangers who were now eyeing with a whirlwind of emotions in their wildly different eyes. The man -correction the other angel- looked at her with the same look he had a moment ago. The taller one with the deepest and oh so caring hazel eyes, looked at her as if she were a dream. Then there was the green-eyed man. His eyes just a shade lighter than hers, flecked with gold like leaves of fall in a lake. He looked at her as if she was a ghost, not a ghost that had just decided to pop up and say hi but one he had been seeing for a while now.
"Balthazar?" she asks standing up slowly, trying to stop her world from spinning. "What do you remember dear?" His tone is sad, but resigned as if he had been waiting for this day. Waiting for the day, she would remember. "Nothing…I…are you alright?" She asks as she hesitantly turns towards him, the flames go's out like it was never even there, and in no time her hands on his face making him look at her. "Balthazar what is going on?" his lips thin and he puts his hands on her waist popping them out of the room.
"Someone want to tell me what is going on." Dean demanded his ton low and dangerous. Sam had heard that tone before many times in fact, things were about to get very ugly if someone didn't explain now. Not that he could blame his brother, it was kind of a shock to see…to see Caroline standing there with Balthazar. There was one thing he hoped he could avoid though, and that was the look that had been so bright in her green eyes. She cared for the angel, and as more than a friend. What would that do to Dean? Sure, his brother had moved on -sort of- with Lisa. However, this was Caroline the same girl Sam had watched Dean almost destroy his life for when she had died.
"I…I am unsure Dean. But as soon as I am able, I will find out what I can." They grew silent as they waited for the two to come back that is if they came back. She had looked at them as if she didn't know who they were. Could that be possible was she brought back like him, but with no memory of her life from before? The big question here was, how was she brought back and why? The two weren't gone long and when the reappeared Caroline eyes were red-rimmed like she was crying, but there were no trace of tears on her cheeks. Balthazar held a bag in his hand and she gripped the edges of coat that was to big for her around her like a shield. The angel didn't say anything just looked at her, but she shook her head telling him a silent no.
Balthazar sighed and walked over to Dean and handed him the bag, "Take her home with you. She doesn't remember anything so you'll have to go slow." he stops not looking any of them in the eye, as he turns back to Caroline who is now crying openly. "It couldn't have lasted my dear, you know that. Go home with your family." with that he was gone again, but Cas followed. Sam on the other hand decided to walk over to her slowly; as if he was afraid she would run away. "Caroline…my name is Sam. You used to call me Sammy, I…hated it, but…except when you called me that." she nodded and looked up at him her green eyes lost and confused.
"Come on I'll take you to the car and we will take you back to Bobby's." She looked so insecure like she did in those long ago days when, she had been a new vampire and so afraid that everyone would hate her. He held out his hand, and she hesitantly put her smaller hand in his. It felt so good to touch her again, to know that she was here and alive. God he had missed her.
Wrapping his arm around her shoulder, he walked her out of the house when they were standing by the Impala, Dean just a few feet away carrying her bag she stopped and looked back at the house. There was such longing and fear in her expressive green eyes that it tore him in two. "You wanna sit up front?" he asks. He remembers when ever she had been tired or sick or just plain sad she would sit up front with them, Dean's hand gripping her thigh softly as he held her. However, that was…it was so long ago in the grand scheme of things. Things were just so different now. "No," she whispers, "I just want…I want to be by myself…well as much as I can." he nodded understanding her completely.
Dean walked around to the trunk, his face blank and unreadable, as he threw her bag in the back with that same single mindedness; he walked to the driver side and climbed inside. Sam opened the back door for Caroline and just before she climbed in Cass appeared before them. "I know you do not remember me. But we were good…yes good is the right word…friends." She just looked up at him with pain-filled eyes. "He wanted…my brother wanted you to have this. He said your old one was broken and he had this made for you." Cass gently took her hand turned it palm up, he dropped an antique ring into her palm.
Caroline let go of the jacket she had been holding in a death grip, with the other hand and clasped it over her mouth struggling, to keep in her sob. "Thank you Cass." he said for her helping her into the car. Ignoring her wishes for space, he climbed in right beside her.
She was a fucking ninny it was simple as that. After all this time together, after everything, how he could just throw her away to people she didn't even know. She had read once "that when a heart breaks it don't break even" and its true, her heart feels like it has shattered into pieces, the edges not clean and smooth. However, jagged and sharp like the edge of a serrated blade. The Impala was silent, but she felt a little peace sitting in the back, the warm leather seats like an embrace from an old friend. She looked at Sam out of the corner of her eye, watched him as he looked out the window at the passing scenery. He had his hand over his mouth and he looked pensive. The other one -Dean- kept looking at her in the rearview mirror, making her feel like she was being suffocated. She didn't know what he wanted from her, what he was waiting for her to say. She didn't remember him didn't remember the life she had, had before purgatory -heck, she couldn't even remember purgatory- before Balthazar.
Thinking of him made her look down at the ring on her ring finger. Her old one, the one that let her walk in the daylight, had been broken when she woke up in a cave, his sapphire blue eyes looking down on her. Now she had a new one, it was gorgeous, but not ostentatious the gem in the middle of the silver band as green as her eyes. Knowing him as she did he probably picked it just for that reason alone. She was heart broken and confused, she didn't understand why he had sent her away, why he just told her, it was for her own good, that she was cramping his style. He couldn't be the playboy he had wanted to be with her around. He had come to earth to practice hedonism to be free and do as he wished. Was that all she was? Just an experiment in hedonism? Did their time together mean more to her than it did to him?
"What happened to your old ring? The one Bonnie made for you?" Sam asks her quietly breaking the thrall on everyone. Dean jumped as if someone had hit him, and she just looked out the window tearing her eyes away from the reminder of him. "Is that who made it for me? Was she a friend?" she asks instead of answering him. She wasn't ready to go into details just yet. She wanted to keep the last seven months locked away in her mind and heart. "Yes to both questions. She was your best friend in fact. Do you really remember nothing?" she nods her mind is hazy like there are cotton balls clogging her memory. She does have flashes of another life though.
She does remember bright green eyes flecked with gold smiling down on her, she remembers laughter and fun. She remembers a pain so strong that it made her want to crumple to the ground and her chest burns as if something is stuck there. However, there nothing more than hazy thoughts like watching a fuzzy TV. She looks at Dean, his eyes are tight and so are the corners of his mouth. This is hard on him, she decided, and not a small part of her wanted to make this all better for him, why she had no clue. Sighing she closes her eyes and leans her head against the window feeling comforted by the cool glass. She figures she might as well get some sleep, maybe then she could get some peace, maybe then her head would just stop pounding like there was a construction crew working inside.
She got out of the Impala bringing Balthazar's jacket closer around her as she looked at the piles of junk cars, and the rambling house with the lights trying to shine through the dirty windows. There was just…something about this place, it was stirring up the snow showing her a path to follow. Something was telling her she knew this house, she knew the man that lived within. "Come on Bobby's waiting." Dean snapped as he charged up the steps and burst through the door. She looked up at Sam in question he just shrugged and murmured, "It's a lot to take in right now. You're supposed to be dead, and then we find you with Balthazar."
She didn't say anything to that, there wasn't after all much she could say, so she just nodded and followed Sam into the house. They walked into what looked like a study but could also be called a living room. It looked like Balthazar is just a bit mustier and scattered looking. She really had to stop that stop comparing everything with her time with him, that part of her life was over now and she had to restart. It was all going to be okay, it would be okay if that damn drilling in her head would just go away.
She had thought sleep would make it better, thought that she was just tired. Her hand crept up to cradle her forehead, trying to ease some of the pressure, it would have worked to, but she just had to look up into familiar blue eyes that were staring at her from under his trucker hat. Her hand reached to him god she knew him. How was that possible? Apparently the construction crew wasn't happy with her pace, so the sped it up by throwing dynamite her way. With just one word, the wall came crashing down around her. "Bobby…" with that she crashed to the ground.
Not exactly happy with this ending but…shrugs…it works. Caroline will be getting back to Caroline soon next chapter. But expect more tears and fighting and a bunch more crap to be tossed everyone's way. And lets not forget that Dean still has Lisa.