Chapter 2: Despite everything
Though despite everything, you continue to stay by my side. Even though I love you, it hurts to try and risk this precious relationship. Despite everyone telling me to confess already, I don't have the courage to risk everything that I have built up to this point. I'm just a coward.
So I'll just watch from the side, admiring your perfect self until I'm brave enough to say, "I love you".
'Wake up. Walk to school. Study for Exams. A repetitive cycle of a normal high school life, repeating over and over until the eventual graduation day. Do I really want things to stay this way though?' Lucy thinks as she continues to write down notes in the library during the lunch time period. Sighing deeply, Lucy closes her biology textbook while tracing her eyes all over her papers. Her fingers trail downwards on the paper, examining the elegantly written notes.
"As expected of an honor student... Studying for exams that are months away" A voice silky to Lucy's ears tingle her mind. She turns to see Natsu's wide grin spread across his face as he looks into her eyes. A small blush plasters itself across Lucy's face as his face inches closer to her face until he reaches the side of her ear. He whispers happily, "You should really take a break from once in a while; you're gonna stress yourself out."
Twiddling her fingers, Lucy fiddles with her thumbs as her hands are intertwined with one another as she pouts at Natsu, "How about you? You should be taking your final year more seriously." Sighing, Lucy whispers back to Natsu, not wanting to disturb the others, "Let's talk outside so we don't disturb the others in the library.
Natsu, grinning widely, walks happily with Lucy as they exit the library. He smiles widely at her as they go towards the grassy field, which was for sports, located at the back of their school buildings. They decide to sit in the shade on a bench; the two enjoying the area surrounding them. Ringing in their ears were the sounds of different students playing football together, along with a few voices of random chatter.
Lucy places her books down beside her, taking out her homemade lunch box and deciding to eat it. She eats in silence, listening to whatever Natsu's talking about, which was most likely about Gray and his rivalry or the games that he plays.
Natsu then goes silent for a second, staring into Lucy's eyes which causes her to shift uncomfortably in her spot, "W..What it is Natsu?". Lucy rubs her face to check if any rice is stuck on her cheek.
Laughing, Natsu inches closer to Lucy and grins while saying, "Can I have some? I ate lunch already but that looks yummy". Natsu rocks back and forth waiting for Lucy's answer, anticipating for a 'yes' reply from her. Lucy, using her chopsticks, picks up a piece of scrambled egg and raises it to his mouth. He happily accepts the offer by taking the entire egg into his mouth and eating it whole.
"So what are you going to do after high school Natsu? Are you planning on going to university?" Lucy, finishing her lunch, packs away her empty box and gently asks Natsu this serious question, knowing that he isn't comfortable with these situations. Silence fills the air after Lucy asks that question; the only thing surrounding them was the light breeze that was causing their hair to gently dance around the small gusts of wind. An etched smile does not leave either of their faces; pure tranquility and satisfaction is what the two feel. The feeling of being comfortable around each other; it's an indescribable emotion.
"I know that many people don't think I can go to university... But I really want to go and study for the profession I want to do," Natsu's eyes gleam with passion, "I told you before on how I admired the police and detectives right?"
Lucy nods her head, remembering how Natsu said a few years ago that he really wanted to become someone the people would rely on.
"I finally decided that I want to do exactly that..." Natsu whispers while lowering his head; his hair covering his eyes just slightly, "... Maybe I can stop people from experiencing what happened to my father."
Lucy doesn't say anything but places her hand near Natsu's, which was laying down on the bench. The two inch closer together, though no too close. There is space between shoulders; no body contact is made. The only contact are their hands pinkies almost intertwining with one another. However, as the two know that they aren't in a romantic relationship, Natsu and Lucy keep their hands separate.
'A murder without a purpose... Why should a person like you Natsu suffer such cruel fate?' Lucy thinks to herself, letting her mind sprawl out.
Breaking the tension, Natsu grins at Lucy asking her, "So what about you? Have you finally made a decision?".
Almost ashamed of herself, Lucy drops her head and shakes it, "I don't know... Nothing is really interesting. I took hard subjects like Chemistry, Biology and Psychology to challenge myself. Though nothing has turned up." The blonde starts to fidget with the buttons of her shirt, pulling and tugging on it, "I wish there was something I could be interested in."
Natsu shoots up from the bench, shocking Lucy just slightly, shouting, "Let's go out today Lucy! You have to clear your mind!"
"Where are we going to go?" Lucy inquires.
"The mall? I don't know! Let's get some food and then just wander around the mall for a bit.
Afterschool...
As soon as school ends, Natsu takes Lucy by the arm, dragging her out of the school campus. He continues to spoil Lucy, treating her (despite her protests) and showing her how much of a good friend can be. After around 3 hours of just wandering randomly without a purpose or aim in mind, Lucy stops walking and smiles at Natsu.
"Thank you... You really are kind." Lucy happily beams at Natsu, causing him to internally squeal at this display.
Natsu flicks her forehead and smirks, "Don't overthink things too much. I'm always here to talk."
The two continue to walk home together, enjoying the warm rays of the sun together.
As Lucy waves goodbye to Natsu and closes the door to her house, She leans against the wall with tears running down her face. Looking into her family photos on the living room wall, the pain in her heart tightens even more. She continues to sob silently into her arm thinking, 'I'm a horrible friend... Why do I have to be in love with the one true friend I have?'.
Unknown to them, Gray spots them from one of the restaurants and huffs in annoyance, 'Just go out already... I'll take her from you as a punishment if you don't hurry...'. He thinks the kindness Lucy has shown him in the past and closes his eyes, trying to push away these feelings.
Despite everything, I will continue to push my feelings away
I don't have the right to say those words
I love you
I'm just going to wait, watching from the side
End of Chapter 2
A/N: Updates may be a bit irregular as I have a very important event coming up soon. I'm sorry for the short author note; I don't know what to say.
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