CHAPTER FIVE
The bones of Princess Azula are stained with sin, scorched from fires, broken by betrayals, cold in loneliness, soaked with the blood of the innocent. Her bones hurt. They ache. She decides, as she always does, it must be because she is getting old. The thought terrifies her and so she decides, as she always does, that she must turn her attention elsewhere.
"Are we too old for this?" Azula asks. "Will we fail?"
"No," hastily says Ty Lee. "We're definitely not too old to save our only daughter from rebels. She needs us, Azula, and we need her. Let's be the good mothers we never let ourselves be."
Azula inhales deeply and sighs softly.
"We have to save her," she says, picking at her lips, looking nervous, a rare expression on her beautiful yet frigid face. Ty Lee licks her lips and eyes her wife closely for a few moments.
"I know," quietly says Ty Lee. "Of course I know that. Azusami is the most important thing in the world to me. I'm never going to lose her. I'm never going to let anyone take her away from me."
Azula snidely scoffs and narrows her weary eyes. "I was unaware you could be so assertive about anything."
"You're not aware of a lot about me. You stopped paying any attention to me years ago, so don't act like you know a single thing about me. You're not as much of a people person as you think you are."
Azula reacts in an instant and regrets it halfway through doing it. She roughly, forcefully backhands her own wife across the face for the first time in their entire relationship. Ty Lee hits her back, right in the throat. Azula doubles over, gasping. Ty Lee touches the red, swollen, painful spot on her cheek.
"Fuck you," whispers Ty Lee, but she has shrunk a thousand times, to the size of an ant, and Azula casts a grand shadow over her as the conqueror finally straightens up, still coughing.
They stare at each other for the longest while, unable to escape the closeness in the airship.
Azula says, utterly out of nowhere, "It was such a long time ago. We were just a couple of kids." Silence. "But we really loved each other, didn't we?"
Her eyes gleam wistfully. Ty Lee stares down at her feet, trying not to remember how beautiful their love story once was, a long, long time ago.
"I wish we could go back," whispers Ty Lee.
"Maybe we can. If we fight for it…"
Ty Lee straightens up again, daring to challenge Azula again, even though she knows anything but complete subservience enrages her wife. "Finding our daughter is worth fighting for. Fixing our marriage—us —we're not something worth fighting for."
Azula clenches her fists and grinds her teeth. "You're wrong. We are something worth fighting for. And I'll fight for us. For both of us if I have to. I'll launch a full scale assault and slash and burn and bleed for us. I'll fight to the death for us because I vowed to."
"That's—that's it again! You just want what you want. You don't want a divorce so no divorce. You want to fight for us when I want to give up. I—"
"It is not about what I want. I simply know what is best for—"
"Azula, you don't get to decide what's—"
"Yes, I do. And not because I am a princess and a conqueror and your superior in every single way. Because I refuse to be held responsible for your mediocrity. I never stopped loving you."
"Yes, you did."
"When?"
"After the Boiling Rock."
"Well, when did you stop loving me? Because I never bothered to find an exact time."
It did not happen quickly. It did not happen at the Boiling Rock. It did not happen during any certain fight throughout their lives—or any certain time Ty Lee did not give Azula whatever she wanted exactly when she wanted it—but slowly.
Ty Lee measures it in kisses.
Azula became a stranger to her over time, as each kiss stepped further away, and their love faded like the sunset becoming night. Left her blinking. Left her alone under a cloudy, pitch-black sky.
Finally, Ty Lee confesses, "You just became more and more distant, 'til I forgot you were there."
Azula does not reply.
She decides she should have never asked the question.
[X]
After the painful airship ride and entering the Boiling Rock, Azula stands in front of her father in a dirty, bleak interrogation room. He gazes at her, handcuffed in a metal chair yet unafraid.
"Are you aware of the extremists operating in the Fire Nation?"
"It is hard not to be."
"I doubt you are aware, however, that they kidnapped your granddaughter."
Ozai remains emotionless. "A shame."
"You should care more. She happens to be a great admirer of yours, father."
Ozai laughs. Azula clenches her jaw.
"An admirer of mine? I'm shocked and, I suppose flattered." The corner of his lip curls upward. "That must be so unfortunate for her. I expected differently from Zuko and the circus freak's child."
Azula cannot restrain herself.
She punches him in the face for daring to mock this dire situation, daring to call Azusami anything but Azula's daughter.
Ozai recoils backwards as blood spurts from his broken nose. He coughs and chokes and Azula simply stands there, cold and still as a statue.
"She is my daughter."
"She is Zuko's daughter and you know it."
"No. I held her the moment she was born. I raised her and I am her mother, as is my wife. Zuko is her uncle and that is absolutely final. You are wasting my time insulting my family and my sexuality. I will not tolerate wasted time when my daughter's life is on the line."
"I am proud of you. You stayed strong even after failing me so miserably and caving in to your brother's demands."
"Shut up," hisses Azula, her teeth bared like the monster she knows herself to be.
"Although," he continues, ignoring her, "it is disappointing that you gave it all up for that slutty circus freak."
Azula punches him again, this time in the neck. She knows this is an interrogation and an interrogation only but she finds it remarkably satisfying.
"I know you're in contact with these misguided-"
"What have you become, little princess?" asks Ozai, choking through blood and the punch to his throat.
"I have become powerful enough to hurt or kill anyone in my way to rescue Azusami. Even my own father." Azula's eyes smolder and Ozai knows she speaks the truth. It almost impresses him.
"I have no idea where she is."
"Give me names. Give me information. Tell me everything you know about these extremists and it will help me track Azusami down. You owe me. You owe me at least that much."
"I owe you nothing." In the ensuing silence, Ozai stares at his daughter for an agonizingly long period of time. Blood slowly and steadily drips from Azula's knuckles but she has no desire to wipe her hands clean. "But in honor of… family, I will tell you enough."
"Enough?" Azula huffs and glowers.
"It is the best you will get from me."
Azula does not want to accept, but she knows that time is running out for her baby girl. So, jaw clenched and tired eyes fiery, she nods.
She does not have much of a choice if she wants to get to Azusami in time.
[X]
"So, we're tracking down a sleazy informant who's buddies with your evil dad?" Ty Lee grimaces.
"Don't you dare complain," hisses Azula. "This is our best chance to find Azusami."
Ty Lee chews on her lower lip as she nods. She struggles to be certain that this is a good idea, but cannot bring herself to fight with Azula, not when Azusami's life is at stake.
And so they walk into the seedy bar in the ghetto of Caldera. The interior and clientele would have disgusted Azula and Ty Lee if they were not so deeply focused on saving their daughter.
They walk through the raucous and rowdy bar, drawing more than their fair share of attention. Is it that obvious that they do not belong here?
Azula glances around until she sees a hooded young man sitting in the shadowy barroom corner. Azula squeezes Ty Lee's hand and subtle nods in his direction.
The two princesses stride over and take a seat across from the mysterious stranger. Azula eyes him for a moment and then makes a decision.
"Are you-"
"Yes."
"I want to speak more privately. Let's do this outside," says Azula in her most commanding tone. It works on everyone, even Zuko and the Avatar. The only person it doesn't work on… is Azusami. Azula's gut pangs, missing her daughter. They parted on such bad terms. Azula can hardly bear it even if she hides it.
Hesitantly, the young man nods. The trio walks as inconspicuously as they can through the rowdy crowd.
At last, they stand in the alleyway behind the bar, in darkness, illuminated only by pale moonlight.
Azula prepares herself to threaten him and certainly rough him up with a bit of threatening blue fire, but Ty Lee beats her to it, pinning his neck to the wall in one swift, practiced motion. Azula blinks, stunned and honestly aroused. Ty Lee became so docile over time, but not in any fashion that benefitted Azula.
"You're going to tell me where my baby girl is or Im' going to paralyze you limb by limb and politely beg my wife to burn you alive."
Azula interjects in a silky purr, "It would be my pleasure."
The poor boy almost pissed himself in fear. But neither Azula nor Ty Lee relent.
"I don't know where she is. That's higher clearance than I have. But I can tell you names of who took her."
Ty Lee leans in close and then punches both of his arms. He screams in terror at the paralysis but no one comes to his rescue. Not in this part of town.
Azula slowly, slowly, slowly, steps forward. His eyes widen. "Let's try this again."
"Okay! Okay! I can tell you where he lives. A lot of the gang hangs out there!"
"Where who lives?"
"The boss man. The guy in charge. The one who gave the order to kidnap the princess."
Ty Lee lets him fall, sobbing, to the ground, and turns to face Azula. Her face is hard and cold as steel.
Azula nods in icy approval.
It is the best they can do anymore.
[X]
Azula and Ty Lee sit on the bed in a grungy countryside inn on their journey to the heart of the Fire Nation to find the next clue that can lead them to their little girl.
"I don't think I can sleep," says Ty Lee softly. "How could I when…?"
"I understand," softly says Azula, uncomfortably shifting her weight from side to side. "I couldn't sleep if my uncle read his dictionary of tea leaves to me for hours."
Ty Lee dares to reach out and hold Azula's hand. Azula gently squeezes and Ty Lee's heart flutters.
"Is this more important to you than pursuing Zuko and Aang ways?"
Azula yanks her hand away, insulted and disgusted.
"Of course. Azusami is my little girl, my flesh and blood. This is not for my father's approval. It's for - it's for maternal instincts and the safety of my - our - daughter!"
Ty Lee purses her lips and nods. Azula analyzes her closely but comes up short.
At last, Ty Lee says, "Maybe it's an inappropriate time but…"
"Spit it out."
"Maybe we can talk about us." Ty Lee averts her eyes, ashamed that she even suggested it.
"I would… like that," admits Azula.
They both linger in silence and darkness, trying to figure out what to say. Words don't come easy in times like these.
"I remember when we were teenagers and everything was perfect. I wish I could go back to then. To back when things were perfect," Ty Lee laments.
"No relationship ever is perfect. It's always a struggle for everyone. You just have to pick the person you want to struggle with." Azula steals the line from Iroh but would never confess that.
"Am I the person you want to struggle with?"
"Well, I'm not spoiled for choice, am I? So yes."
Ty Lee smiles, just a little bit, but enough to give Azula butterflies in her stomach.
"Traveling with you does make me remember the good old days. When we were happy together and stuff."
Azula pauses to contemplate that, to guiltlessly let those memories wash over her for at least a moment.
"That was," she slowly decides, "a lifetime ago. We were different people then."
Ty Lee chews on her lip. They have become destroyed of late due to her anxiety, chapped, torn up, bloody and salty. Maybe Azula has a point. Ty Lee used to be so carefree. Ty Lee does not know what happened, how she became a woman who has forgotten how to smile. She wants to blame Azula but cannot; her princess has always been a blind spot.
"I keep thinking about what we could've done to prevent this from happening to Azusami," breathes Ty Lee.
"I have never known you to worry," says Azula.
"I'm just real, real good at hiding it." Ty Lee tries not to frown but fails. Azula takes a sharp breath and averts her eyes. "I'm sorry," Ty Lee halfheartedly slaps on.
Azula does not look back up as she declares softly, "I think I ought to go to sleep. Perhaps with both should."
That night they lie closely together but feel miles apart in their hearts.
[X]
In the morning, Azula and Ty Lee take a carriage through the rough roads of the rural Fire Nation. The ride is uncomfortable for more than one reason. The bumps on the road hurt and the two women say nothing to each other for hours, just stare out of the windows.
At last, they reach a lakeside town. It seems to have once upon a time been a hub of wartime industry, judging by the large, abandoned factory no one bothered to tear down. Perhaps that is why nostalgic ideas about the old Fire Nation before Zuko's reign took root here.
Azula and Ty Lee ditch the carriage just outside of the town limits. Ty Lee pays t he driver and they walk through the golden shadows of the late afternoon, seeking the house the informant told them about.
"Are you ready?"
"Of course I am. They took my daughter; it's time for them all to die. Painfully."
"For once, we can agree on something."
Ty Lee beams. Azula feels something strange inside of her that she cannot identify or explain. She has not seen Ty Lee smile like that in years. At least, not at her.
It feels good, until Azula crashes back to the reality of her marriage.
[X]
Ty Lee knocks on the door of the right house. Azula stares at her like she is insane for doing it but Ty Lee does not explain herself. She sees no reason to do so. Her wife can judge her all she likes.
No one answers.
"Do you think he was tipped off?" asks Azula slowly, her whole body tensing. She has a very bad feeling about this. But Azusami. If this is a chance to save Azusami, she supposes she must take her chances.
"Maybe. But we can still catch and torture him. We're stronger than anybody. We conquered Ba Sing Se, remember?" Ty Lee says, a smile spreading across her face.
Azula wonders when they switched roles and Ty Lee became the wicked one.
Yet, Azula has the same plan as her. Capture, torture, discover the information they need, and then kill him.
Azula takes one look at the door and then kicks it down. They both warily walk inside, Ty Lee's fists raised, cerulean fire on Azula's palms lighting the way and preparing for a fight.
They walk towards the staircase as they slowly realize that this place is abandoned. They were tricked.
"We need to get out of-" Azula begins to command before bows drawn, pointed at them from every direction, cut the two women off.
It only takes Azula a moment to realize that they are not ordinary arrows; they are electrified like lightning. By lightning.
Azula and Ty Lee snap into action.
Ty Lee watches Azula fight as they both clash with the twenty or thirty men and women armed to the teeth, with a clear advantage over two women far out of practice when it comes to combat. Ty Lee punches and grabs and claws, while Azula moves with such brilliant clarity, her fire the only thing illuminated the dark, dusty house.
Ty Lee watches and sees Azula as a warrior with fire in her veins and armor beneath her skin, who crushes anything in her way beneath her feet. She is as immortal as they claimed she was when she brought Ba Sing Se to its knees. Her raven hair is streaked with daggers, smoke filling her lungs as she exhales flame here and there. She is Ty Lee's princess again, with her lips made of jagged glass - the ones that were once both fragile and agonizing to kiss - her each breath invitingly toxic. She smiles as she fights, a grin made for war. Her eyes are flecked with ash as she condemns men and women to death.
Azula watches Ty Lee as she burns and electrocutes. Her wife drags people down, paralyzes them, crushes their noses once they hit the floor. She is filled with anger and thirst sparked by the loss of her daughter, her shattered marriage, her life in shambles. She swallows these bastards raw and death never before greeted someone with so warm and delicate a kiss.
But then the victory starts to crumble, because a lightning struck arrow flies from above, flying directly at Ty Lee. Her eyes widen as lightning melds with the arrow, flashing bright in the room. Azula lunges forward, dashing in front of the blow, trying to strike down the powerful firebender who shot it at her wife on her way, but failing, because it collides with her chest and she falls. She breathes raggedly and her shoulders shudder.
Ty Lee falls onto her knees, letting out a wordless cry.
Another arrow hits Azula in the shoulder, narrowly missing her neck.
Her eyes close.
Ty Lee rises, and leaves a massacre in her wake, before carrying her unconscious wife from the building and running to the town healer as fast as she can go, tears streaming down her rosy cheeks.
[X]
After the healer does her work with herbs and massages, Azula lies there on the rough, straw filled bed, pale, unconscious, barely breathing. Ty Lee's gut twists as she gazes at the woman who was once the love of her life.
"Be strong," she whispers to her wife, "Please be strong, the Azula I know. The world needs you. Azusami needs you. I… I need you. Despite our situation, despite Azusami… it's been good spending time with you again. Get better. I… I love you. I never stopped loving you. I hope you know that. Please don't die… I can't live without you."
Ty Lee is only answered by silence.