Chapter one

Yamamoto

Life was simple for me. It was kind of a triangle I walked every day, school, baseball field, home. I mostly got up at five o'clock for the morning jog, and then headed home for taking a shower before I ate breakfast and went to school. I usually slept away the half of the classes, so I never remembered what exactly the teachers were rambling during that time. After school I went on the baseball field for my training, returned home in the evening and helped my dad out with the guests in the restaurant, then I'd eat dinner and worry about how I could finish my home works while not listening in class. So if our Japanese-teacher asked us to write an essay with the topic "my day", I'd probably give him a boring journal account. I've never had a F, though, since I always crammed right the day before our exams and tests, so my teacher could just glare at me without saying a word. I could only relax while I was playing baseball, forgetting all troubles, as if there only was me, my bat and that small white ball flying towards me. To run right under the setting sun, covered with dust and sweat was a pure happiness to me. You might call it escapism if you want, since I sometimes thought the same. My aim was nothing more than to play in Koshien and then become a pro. baseballer, taking over the sushi restaurant of my dad after I had retired. Up until now, I used me whole life achieving my goals, I've never thought of doing something else than that. I thought that life was like that.

I was wrong.

Life was more than that. Even the straight lines you've already drawn could have turning points, and then go completely different directions.

I met him when the first trimester of year 7 was about to end. As in every morning, the class teacher came in, and I was sleeping as in every morning as well. The footfalls were kind of jumbled, so I supposed there were two persons entering the room. It was quiet in the class, almost too quiet, like they were expecting something. "Let me introduce our new student to you: this is Hayato Gokudera from Italy." I heard the voice of our teacher and looked up.

If you really ask me about the first impression, well, I was like 'he's a mixed-blood, isn't he?' He looked a bit like a girl at the first glance, which definitely didn't suit his weird surname. He was wearing a T-shirt in his school uniform; he had fair skin and his wrists were hidden under those heavy ornaments.

I gazed at his face again. The silhouette of an Asian was broken by that conspicuous silver hair of his. Under his furrowed brows there was a pair of almost transparent green eyes.

Like crystal in the sunlight.

＊＊＊

Life didn't change much after the arrival of the new student, except that the vacant seat in class was filled and the teachers got one more to worry about. I still went the triangle of home, school, baseball field. Sometimes I'd met classmates at the crossroad, walking the rest of the way to school together while talking and laughing with each other. I often saw that bright silver in the warm morning sunshine, next to him it was Tsunayoshi Sawada who's sitting in the front row. The others told me that Gokudera was a lone wolf- he wouldn't let people near him with a distance smaller than five meters. I looked at those two shadows in the front and thought that there were definitely less than five meters which were between them.

What a strange guy.

It seemed like Tsunayoshi Sawada was the one who had beaten the captain of the Kendo-club some times ago and was now the talk of the whole school. I started to pay attention to him, wanting to know more about him.

The first time we spoke was during the PE lesson, when we decided to play baseball. Tsunayoshi Sawada was the only one to be left out at the team-choices, and the captains couldn't decide what to do with him, or better: both teams didn't want him, so they ended up finger guessing again. I suddenly said: "Let him come to our team."

In the end we lost the game, everybody was really angry and they suggested letting Tsunayoshi Sawada clean up the field. I stayed, too, since I was the one who came up with the idea taking him into our team.

While we were cleaning, I gazed at his eyes, a familiar light in them kind of surprised me.

It was reassuring.

I didn't have anything I really hate, and also because I was straightforward in the things I do and I say, my relationship with the others has always been pretty good. But if you take it another way, I didn't have people I could call my real "friends".

So wanting to become real friends with Tsunayoshi Sawada maybe also had some selfish reasons.

I told him about the things that didn't go right these weeks, things I had never told anybody before. He listened confounded, and when I asked him for an advice he was shocked.

Keep trying harder…maybe. He answered without looking into my eyes.

I smiled, like every time. If someone again told me to try harder, then I probably should do that.

＊＊＊

When I walked in the hospital with a severe pain in my right arm, I suddenly had a bad feeling.

"You might not be able to do sport anymore with your hand hurt like this."

It was a bolt from the blue.

At that time I wanted to rive that bandage and smash the plaster. All effort till now turned out to be useless, everything was shattered. I only could play baseball, I only wanted to play baseball, what meaning did my insipid life has without baseball?

Inward, I was crying like a child. I sat dully on my chair; the world was collapsing and decomposing, falling down and breaking in thousand pieces, remaining only grey dust.

I deeply realized the meaning of "despair". Regret was bulging in my head, if I haven't stayed on the field, if I haven't run like crazy, if I have paid attention to the ground…if I… does it change anything by saying this? It couldn't be changed, because it has already turned into history.

I wouldn't say that I hadn't been scared when I was standing next to the handrails at the edge of the rooftop of the school. My arm still was hurting, my heart as well because of my inner struggle.

The people surrounding me… there're more now. The shout became louder. What were they saying? I couldn't hear them.

I closed my eyes and then opened them again, looking at the grey houses, the grey sky, the grey Namimori, this grey world I was about to say good-bye to.

A loud "bam" all sudden pulled me back to the reality. I turned and saw Tsunayoshi Sawada sitting in front of me. They all wanted to try to persuade me. But why? Let me be and end this by myself. Tsuna, you must understand me. No-good in everything, dying was much easier.

"Yamamoto, we're not the same." Tsuna hesitated.

So you too look down on me? Right, Tsuna you did great the past weeks, but I was a fool who couldn't even play baseball anymore, there's no way I could compare myself with you!

Tsuna blinked: "Actually I'm a coward who doesn't think of regret until he's dying, only then I would notice: 'Oh, if I've known I'd die, why hadn't I tried harder' or something like that, 'cause I wouldn't be content to die like that." He clutched his shirt and frowned, "So I don't understand your feeling, Yamamoto, I'm really sorry!" He turned and tried to run away.

His words hit my heart and I stunned. Without trying, without trying out the possibility of maybe only one percent, I have negated all my efforts and dreams, even negated my own existence, what an idiot I was! And I wanted to talk about future? Wanting to die meant scorning all of that!

I scorned my seeks.

It was unbelievable I was about to give up on my whole life just because of a hurt arm and some tiny little things that hadn't gone well lately. I was so fragile and pathetic, dad would definitely beat me up if he got to know.

Without thinking I grabbed the sleeve of the busy running away Tsuna. Because of he tried to escape like crazy and struggled, also because of I pulled him back a bit too hard, the rusty handrail between us was broken by him, so we both fell from the rooftop with the inertia.

There must've been more than 15 meters from there to the ground, falling down like this meant an undoubtedly death. After the persuasion of Tsuna I already'd let go of the stupid suicide-idea, so I was flurried, but the more flurried one was Tsuna, who got involved without any reason and even fell off the roof with me.

Please forgive me, Tsuna, I prayed inwardly, since I'm the one who's gonna land at first, I hope you'll fall on me so you maybe can survive with the buffer.

Suddenly Tsuna's clothes disappeared (except his knickers), he shouted loudly, I was a bit shocked even if my reactions were slowed down because of the high speed fall. Before I could come to myself again, we had both landed safely on the ground.

I smiled at Tsuna as if I didn't saw his strange action just a moment ago: "Tsuna, you're strong indeed!" He didn't seem like he had gotten his breath, so he didn't answered. I shut my mouth, being kind of ashamed and uneasy.

The noisy crowd above us saw that we were unhurt, so they thought we were kidding with them by using wires and went mind their own business. It was good just like that, without making a big drama out of this accident and giving rise to unnecessary rumors. I simpered at myself, trying to hide my own sentiments. Was I hiding it from Tsuna, or was I hiding it from myself? I didn't know.

As I thought, nobody mentioned the incident the next day at school, I decided to forget it myself, to say good-bye to my hesitant and frail self, so I could move forward better, and try my best achieving my goals.

After I'd changed my shoes, I ran into the classroom with the bells ringing, my annoying class teacher looked on his watch, rolled his eyes when he realized I wasn't late and just gave me the sign of going to my seat.

At first I thought I was the last one to arrive, but five minutes after the lesson had started, the door was kicked open, and that silver color came into my sight again.

If I thought about it, the one who came even later than me everyday was this Gokudera. My eyes followed him walking to his desk and sitting down; he put his legs on the desk and glared at the teacher. A kind of respect arose spontaneously in my heart. He might be the only one in this world who acted so arrogant towards the teachers and yet didn't get expelled.

"Here are your exams." The teacher who looked a bit scared by him and tried to keep his anger under control changed the subject resentfully, "the grades this time aren't as good as expected, especially the grades of someone who made the average even worse than it already has been." He walked to Tsuna and smacked the paper on his desk, "You better try harder next time!"

"I saw it! He only has gotten 21 points! As expected from No-Good-Tsuna!" The boy who sat in the row next to me laughed and told me.

"Oh, I see." I answered abstracted, feeling sort of offended with no reason.

"Takeshi Yamamoto." The teacher announced, "I'll forgive you because of the fact that you are the only regular member of the baseball team in our year."

A big red 62 was written on the paper. I almost thought I'd flunked when I heard the tone of the teacher, but there's nothing I had to worry now, 'cause dad would be okay with everything if I didn't stay down or something like that.

"The last one is…Hayato Gokudera." The teacher's expression looked pretty stiff, "The only one who has gotten 100-points."

Wow, he'd gotten 100 points in an exam like this!

It was a thing you should be excited about, but Gokudera still looked unhappy. He finally started beaming after he'd noticed Tsuna, who was looking at him admiring, and he bowed while saying something.

Why did this transfer student, who didn't speak more than 3 sentences to other people every day, seem like a completely different person when he saw Tsuna?

Ah, curiosity was troublesome indeed.

A/N: There isn't (and won't be) any 8027 in this fic, so I apologize for everything in this chapter that seemed like 8027... All the following chapters will be mainly YamaGoku or one of them.