Giving Up Cassie

By StarnightSam

Chapter Two

"Come on Cassandra, the restroom in is down this hall." Sam steered her into the bathroom to wash up. "Aunt Sam, would you just call me Cassie like Uncle Jack. That's what my mom called me too." Sam pulled the little girl into a hug. She'd noticed a hint of sadness in the child's voice.

"Sure, honey. Cassie it is." Sam waited for her to come out and then settled her down to cartoons. She'd found out the first night that Cassie stayed with her how much the child loved them. Sam watched the expressions of joy on her face as she made her way to the kitchen to see if she could help the Colonel.

Jack noticed the smile on Sam's face as she entered the kitchen and looked through the opening into his den at the child. She was giggling. Both the adults stopped and watched her through the opening a few minutes. "She so cute," Sam said then looked up at Jack. He'd moved close enough for her to feel the heat from his body, but didn't touch her.

"Yeah, kids have a way of making life so much fun." He said almost sadly, but the smile was still on his face. Catching himself he moved back to the stove to flip the pancakes.

Sam moved with him, "Can I do anything? I can't cook very well, but I can place the table or pour the juice." Jack smiled at her, flipping the last pancake.

"Sure. Plates are in the cabinet at the right, glasses next to that and the flatware is in that drawer," he directed pointing the flipper at the right drawer. Sam busied herself getting all the necessary things and placed them on his breakfast bar. She poured the juice, then went back to the window and watched Cassie while Jack placed the cooked bacon and eggs on a platter with the pancakes.

"Carter, since this isn't morning, do you want coffee?" He already knew she would. He'd already put the pot on. He'd found that both his scientist loved their coffee at all hours.

"Sure," she answered without looking up.

"Food's on," he called in another couple of minutes.

"It doesn't appear that she's interested, Sir." Sam went to get Cassie after a few seconds.

"Come on, sweetie. The Colonel has the food ready. Aren't you hungry?"

"Can I just watch the rest of this one?" Cassie begged, looking at Sam with puppy dog eyes. Jack swooped in and gathered the child up in his arms and swung her around.

"Don't you fall for that, Carter, 'cause it'll be another one and then another one. We're eating while it's hot, young lady." He said smiling at her as he put her down and tickled her sides. Squealing with laughter, Cassie ran away from him.

"Okay, then I'll beat you to the table," Cassie declared. Sam's laughter filled the room and Jack's heart. It also brought back such wonderful memories for him.

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Three days later…..

Sam sat staring at her computer. She was so deep in thought she didn't hear Jack enter her lab. He'd watched her for several minutes before he walked up to her table. She still hadn't heard him when he called her name. "Carter?"

"Sir! Uhhhh... I guess I didn't hear you come in. What can I do for you?" She asked, embarrassed that he'd caught her so off guard.

"Its okay, Carter. Whatcha thinkin' about? You looked lost."

"I guess I am." She looked at him with wide open eyes. Eyes that held so much doubt and pain that he could almost feel it. He waited for her to elaborate, just trying to read her face.

"It's.. uh….Cassie, Sir. I don't know what to do about her." She finally replied to his questioning eyes. She looked away for a few seconds, then back at him. "Sir, if I wanted to keep her, what affect would it have on my position on SG1?" Her pleading eyes willed him to say 'not anything' but she knew it wouldn't be that simple.

"Well, Carter, I'm not sure. But there are people who go through the gate that have kids. Are you thinking of keeping her?" But Jack already knew the answer to that. He'd even thought of keeping her himself, since none of them wanted to see her adopted by anyone that would take her away. But it had been only be a fleeting thought; he knew that alone he couldn't take care of the child properly with his job and the hours it required.

General Hammond was working on getting clearance for her to be placed for adoption. The lawyers and higher powers were discussing just what information would have to be given to prospective adoptive parents. But it was taking too much time. The members of SG1, Janet, and even the General himself were becoming more and more attached to this little girl. Even, Dave Dixon, who already had three kids had offered to adopt her.

"Sir, I love my job, don't get me wrong. I do. But I just don't know if I can let her go with anyone else. I already feel like she's mine," she was almost whispering before she finished her sentence. Sam looked back at her hands before he could see the tears forming.

Jack pulled up a stool and sat down beside Sam. "I know. But Carter we also have to think of her. A kid needs a home to come to every night. Stability." She quickly met his gaze. Neither of them said anything else for a while, just staring at each other in the way they were learning to communicate without words.

"Carter, then there's this thing we do. This Stargate Program. We need you. Our team needs you to be with us. Hell, I'm not sure we'd be here if not for you. I need you, Sam." He'd said too much, but his face showed even more. She stared into his eyes trying to decide exactly what he meant, but too afraid of his answer to ask. "Uh.. I mean with the team. I need you with the team. Please just consider that too." He tried to catch his impromptu declaration.

Janet stood outside the door of Sam's lab listening to their conversation. She felt bad that she was ease dropping on a very private conversation. But she couldn't make herself move. The Colonel was right. Cassie did need a stable home, and she really hoped it could be hers. But she knew she had to work out things with Sam before going to the General with her proposal. After hearing their conversation and realizing now was not the best time to talk to Sam, Janet left without ever letting them know she'd overheard. She had a lot to think about, too.

After a long silence Sam looked up at the Colonel. "All I need to know right now is will you help me? If I decide to keep her, will you and the team be there for me?" She looked desperate, waiting for his answer. How could she not know he'd always be there for her?

"Carter, you know without a doubt that we will," then he added softly, "I will." His eyes spoke much more than his words. But, Sam wasn't sure what she was seeing, wasn't sure because she couldn't let herself believe what his expression was saying.

"Whatever you decide we'll be behind you. Help with her, whatever you need. But, I just want you to really think this over. You'll have to give up a lot. Either the gate travel or the lab work will have to go or be drastically reduced. Even when you don't want too, she'll have to be first. There'll be school, and school stuff that she'll need and want her mom at. What if you're off world or captured and can't get back like we've been before? What happens to her?" Another sad expression briefly crossed his face.

Jack stopped talking giving her time to think about his comments. "Carter, I'm not saying don't do it. Just think of her needs as well as what you want. You know I've been here before. It's hard on the kid when his dad isn't at home." Sam quickly looked at him though wide-open eyes. He'd suddenly made this so personal. His face was drawn and pain darted through his eyes. He stopped looking at her and she knew just how hard he found this to talk about.

"Colonel, thanks. It means a lot to know you'll be here for me. I promise I will think about all sides, including what it will do to our team." He brought his eyes back to meet hers.

"And I'll be her Uncle Jack and do all I can to help you if you do keep her. I already love her, too." He smiled and she smiled at him. Such a smile! It made his whole heart lighter. He struggled to get up and move slightly away from her. He knew if he didn't move out of touching distance, he'd have her wrapped in his arms again. And he didn't need to make a habit of that.

"Well, Carter. Keep me apprised." He smiled at her and left. Sam watched as he quickly made his way from her lab wondering what had set a fire under him to get him out so fast.

TBC

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