Leaving and Coming
Chapter 2- Goodbyes
I don't own Twilight
My life would never be the same he had left me, all alone, to raise a child, his child...alone.
I sat on the bathroom floor staring at the toliet, feeling more nacous then ever. I thought, he told me, he said it was safe. He said I couldn't be pregnant. Vampires couldn't get a person pregnant but, I guess that was just another lie he told. I mean really, after all vampires existing was suppose to be a lie.
I didn't know what to do. On one hand I was petriffied of having his child. A child at the age of 18. How could I handle that? How would I explain my rapidly growing stomach to my mother, father, Jacob and the people in the small, gossip-filled town of Forks.
Jacob would be mad, he would be fuming. I would too, if I knew that someone who I had an unrequitted love kept going back to the same person and watching them go through the pain that I had now. Plus we are adding the whole vampire vs. werewolf / mortal enemies thing into the equation so that makes the outcome even worse.
Then my thoughts wondered back to my child. Would he or she be a vampire? A human? Both?
I felt so lost and alone. I would have to be strong though now, strong for my baby. My baby. I never really thought about having kids and would have gladly given up the thought to be with him but, now I wanted my baby more than anything. He or she was dependant on me, he/she trusted me with their life and I wouldn't let them regret it.
I don't care if I have to move away from everyone, move to another country, I don't care as long as me and my child will be together that's all that matters.
I tried to calm down but I couldn't. My heart sped up, thumping rapidly against my chest. I never had to think about this before but, now I knew I had to. I would have people to help me through this but, I would be pityed. The charity case. My child would be teased in school, for having the depressed, nutcase mother, who couldn't get over her ex.
No, I wouldn't let this happen. I had to leave. What month was it now? May? Yes, May 16th. I would be graduation would be at the beginning of June. I wouldn't run until then.
That's it. I had the perfect plan. I would wait until I graduated, I wouldn't show until then so it would be ok. I would tell everyone I was taking summer classes at the University of Alaska, which I was supposibly going in the fall. I would tell them I got excepted to do them at the last minute.
I would take the money I had in my bank account that I had complete control over now and leave. I would disappear. It will be as if I never existed. Yes, my parents would be heartbroken for a while but now my mom had Phil and ever since Harry Clearwater had died Sue has been coming around here a lot.
Jacob would just have to deal. I know he'll get over it one day.
I'd be all alone but, not for long...I'd soon have my baby. He/She will be the only one who will have my love.
--Graduation--
Those last few weeks have pasted by quickly. Everyone had excepted my lie. No one suspected anything. I felt guilty and ashamed.
Today at graduation I decided that this would have to be the last time I would see Jacob and Billy. I hugged them both as my eyes thought it was from the accomplishment of highschool, if they only knew the truth.
I called Renee a few minutes ago and cried again.
I started packing all of my things away, as much as I could fit into my two suitcases and carry-on. I fit in the majority of my clothes, a hairbrush, a toothbrush, my camera, some non romantic books, bathroom items and a few other things such as my ipod and pillow.
Yesterday I had deposited all of the remenants of my bank account which summed up to about $10,000. It came from all of my childhood birthdays, graduation and other special events.
It wasn't a lot but, it was enough for me. I would have to get a job when I arrived at my future destination to support us.
My heart started to speed up again. It seemed as if that's all it did now a days. I knew I had to go though. Much to my surprise I was pretty large already. I had to wear baggy clothes now. It's a good thing my dad isn't too observent.
Everyone else thought it was because he, Edward left again. That's right I said Edward, much to my surprise (and happiness) I can say his name now. I still yearn for him but, at least I'm more concentrated with other things. I think about him sometimes but, I don't cry anymore, well at least less than I did before.
"Ah!" I screamed out in pain. I knelt on to the ground clutching my stomach in pain. this would happen sometimes wwhen the baby moved. It hurt so bad, it felt as if I was being stabbed in the gut repeatable.
It was a good thing that Charlie had to go back to work after the ceremony. I could scream all I wanted, I didn't have to believe that the pain wasn't there. I didn't have to ignore it, I could let it out.
I crawled in my bed wearing a baggy t-shirt and some capris and slowly let myself drifting into slumber thinking of my baby and I.
--The Next Morning--
I awoke as the bright light of the sun shown through my bare window and hit my eyelids. I slowly propped myself of up and rubbed the sand out of my eyes. I smelt pancakes.
That was a surprise, not once have I smelt anything here that I haven't cooked. I walked down the stairs to see two plates set with pancakes piled high on them with syrup pooled on the top dribbling down the sides.
"Goodmorning Bells. I thought that since it was your last day here I would make breakfast for you."
I smiled a little but, it was a weak smile. I looked at his face and saw pain and sadness. I knew he wouldn't admit it but, I think that he would rather have me stay here than leave for collage early.
"Thanks Dad"
"You got everything packed and ready?"
"Yeah" I said while cutting my breakfast.
"What time does your flight leave?"
"Around 11"
"This is going to be a great experience for you Bella. Collage will do good for you, get your mind off that boy."
"Dad, I'm fine" I replied quietly
"No, you're not. I mean look at you Bella. You don't think I noticed! You put no effort into your apperance, you never laugh and you even gained some weight."
I sat there, silence overwhelmed us, niether of us knowing what to say. I was shocked he had noticed my stomach...well at least he didn't think I was pregnant.
"I'm going to go get dressed. I don't want to be late."
I went upstairs and quickly changed into another baggy shirt that read University of Alaska. My mother had bought it for me when I told her about my exceptance. I also put on some gray sweats.
I had taken the majority of my things and put them into Charlies car and I was now taking one last trip to make sure I hadn't forgotten anything.
I reached into my pocket and pulled out my cellphone. I slid it underneath my bedframe. I decided that it would be best if I left it here so I wouldn't be tempted to answer it when my parents started calling it.
My feet led me down the stairs and into the passanger seat, next to my father. He started the engine and the look that graced his face was heartbreaking. It pained me to know that this was because of my doing. If this look was because of not seeing me till Thanksgiving, what look would he wear if he knew this was our last encounter.
I hated leaving him but, I knew it was better this way. How would he feel having to take care of a vampire baby and having the whole town know his daughter couldn't keep her pants on.
I focused out of my thoughts and back on to the scenary in which I would probably never see again. This scenary showed me though that we were already in a city. I looked at the digital clock located in the car. It was already 9:16. This city must be Seattle.
It was because a few minutes later I saw the signs for the airport.
--
I stood outside with my bags at my feet. Charlie deep in thought and I trying to remember his facial structure.
I felt my body being enclosed tightly and for once didn't mind the close contact. I returned the hug as my eyes started to leak salty tears.
"Don't cry Bells, I'll see you at Thanksgiving break and we can always talk on the phone."
I didn't dare to reply, for all I could do is lie. I wouldn't do that to him so I just stayed quiet.
He soon released me from the hug.
"Bye Bells" He said and I saw his own eyes water as mine did before. He turned around and walked back to his car and drove away. The tears that left my eyes now came faster and I'm sure my face was puffy to. I wiped my face with my sleeve, picked up my bags and walked into the spacious airport.
In my hand was a ticket that read One Way to Juneau, Alaska. I walked over to the Customere Service desk and waited on a short line. Before me was a lady with blond hair and next to her stood her son who looked exactly like her. Then when she went to the counter a man with dark blond hair came over to her and kissed her and hugged the son.
It broke my heart, that could have been me and Edward. No...it wouldn't have. He didn't love me, he never did, he was selfish and moody. I was a toy to him and I would never let that happen again.
"Next" I heard a voice call and I went over to the counter.
"How may I help you today, miss?" A lady of about 30 asked.
"Well you see there is a mistake. My father purchased the wrong ticket. This ticket is for Alaska and I had no intension of going there."
"Oh I am terribly sorry miss, I will clear this up as soon as possible. I will just need to see some identification."
I dug through my purse and pulled out my wallet which contained my driver's license and showed it to her. I filled out all of the forms she needed me to sign and returned my wallet into my purse.
"Just one more question. Where is your destination?"
Where did I want to go? No place sunny, my baby might sparkle and that would be pretty hard to explain to other people. I had to do a project about Rochester, New York. I could go there. I knew it was very cloudy there.
"Um, do you have a ticket to Rochester, New York?"
"Yes, the flight leaves in two hours. Would you like me to print up a ticket for you?"
"Yes, please."
She handed me the ticket and I went through all the necessary airport regulations and found myself near the gate that lead me to my future, no our future. I rubbed my stomach and look at it. I loved 'em so much.
I was walking over to a plastic seat when something caught my eye. It was a little purple baby hat carefully folded. I walked over to the store and went inside. I saw that in addition to this cute purple one, there was a yellow one, a blue one and a green one. They each had a white band around it but, each was still different yet still matching the others.
The purple one had pink hearts on the white band, meaning that this hat was meant for a cute little girl, that would love to play dress up and probably care for people more than she did herself.
The yellow one had pale orange flowers on the band, meaning that the baby would be girl who loved to help, she would be mommy's little helper.
The blue one had little baseballs on the band, meaning that this little boy would love to play and joke around, he would have good morals and wouuld clearly believe in right and wrong.
The green hat had little animals on the band, meaning that this little boy would be adventerous, always wanting to learn, explore and try new things.
Who was I kidding? These "meanings" had nothing to do with the symbols on them. It is just what I thought the baby would be like that wore that hat.
I countinued to stare at them and I tried to leave the store but, couldn't. As much as I knew it was overly priced, I had to buy one but, I couldn't. I had to buy all four. I didn't know what my baby would be like. When he or she would be born I would then choose the correct hat for them.
After I made my purchase, I walked over to one of those plastic, cushioned airplane seats and thought about how my life had changed so drastically. How did this happen? I was once a happy, carefree teenager who felt whole with love and friendship. No I felt betrayed,disgusted and dissappointed in myself. How could I have let this happen again. I let him back into my life when I have never should have. It was his fault.
My baby would never have a father because of him.
"We will now be boarding flight 405 to Rochester, New York. All passengers, please come to gate 6." I heard a loudspeaker say.
I looked at my watch realizing that two hours had quickly passed. I picked up my carry on bag and the shopping bag that contained my hats and walked over to the newly formed line. I handed a flight attendant my ticket and walked over to the gateway. I paused and turned around and stared at the airport.
"Goodbye Edward" I whisperred as I turned and walked onto the airplane.
Super sorry for the long update! As we all know I am a procratinator so ya know, you'll probobly get long updates. Sorry, I'll try.
Also I think that form now on I'm going to post the people who reviewed, as a sign of appreciation. :D. So here it is...
---THE WOUNDERFUL REVIEWERS---
NoAverageAngel
Thank you for being my first review and only review on this story!!! If you would like your username on my cool list ya know what to do.
If you really don't want to review you don't have to. Don't feel obligated to.
---Heartz---