The Mobian Agenda

A VALVe/Archie Crossover

By TrueVulcanRaven

Rated: T for Language, Violence

Legal Notice: I do not own these characters. They are copyright Sega, Archie, or VALVe.

"Less Than Welcome"

The scientist nearly fell to his knees, and he bit back the urge to vomit. Teleportation still left him with a sense of dizziness. He navigated the heads-up display on the inside of his helmet and selected an injection that would alleviate his discomfort. After the drug set in, he analyzed his current location. He was in a long corridor that was lined with what appeared to be holding cells. The walls were made of a blue-black metal alloy. Lodged in the ceiling were long, cylindrical bulbs that cast a harsh white light on the hallway.

Judging from the look of things, I'd say I've warped into a prison. Until I find a weapon, I'd do well to tread lightly.

"Motion detected!" a monotone voice called out from around a corner.

Gordon barely had time to curse silently to himself before the source of the noise rounded the bend.

"Unidentified unit found!" the humanoid robot stated, leveling a pulse rifle of some sort at him. "State your call name and serial number! You have five seconds to comply!"

Think, Gordon! For Christ's sake, think! He raised his hands in the air to signal his intent to comply and took extremely small steps towards the robot. "False alarm. Designation: GFML-102. Serial number: 807-13-6254."

"Searching databanks…records not found!" the android concluded, raising its weapon up to its bright red optical receptor. "Commencing termination!"

"Negative!" Gordon yelled, still inching his way towards the droid. His mind raced to come up with something to buy him a little more time. "I am a prototype for the new Lambda series. The roster has not yet been updated to include my credentials." Almost there…almost.

A hinge near the android's wrist popped open to reveal a communication device. "SWAT unit KMS-23 to Central Control. Come in, Central Control." The robot waited for confirmation for what seemed like hours to Gordon. It looked down to examine what could possibly be interfering with the broadcast of its message for only a split-second—more than enough time for Gordon to make his move. His mechanically-enhanced might allowed him to make short work of the droid. He tackled the robot, whose weapon flew from its hands and skidded across the floor. The SWAT unit sent a vicious kick Gordon's way that would have crushed his shoulder had he not been wearing his hazard suit. It rolled onto its stomach, trying to get to its feet and recover its rifle. Gordon was quicker, though. He jumped onto its back and gripped the android's head at the point where it connected to the torso. The servos and motors inside the suit whirred and grinded to amplify his strength, giving him just enough power to permanently relieve the SWAT unit of its most vital component.

"Central Control to KMS-23."

The communicator! Must be running on an independent power source.

"KMS-23, respond, over."

Gordon tried to muster his best Ben Stein imitation. "Situation stabilized. Rogue unit destroyed. Awaiting further instructions."

"Affirmative. Cleanup crew is en route. Continue patrol. Central Control out."

The scientist breathed a sigh of relief. His respite was short-lived.

"Central Control to KMS-23. Respond."

Now what? "Reporting in."

"Anomaly detected. Recent scans report supposed deactivation of unit KMS-23. Request explanation."

"Uhh…. Assessing. Conclusion: possible equipment malfunction."

Real smooth, Gord.

"Unacceptable. Proceed immediately to repair station RS-010 for full evaluation."

Something tells me this conversation isn't going to end on pleasant terms.

As such, Freeman slammed his boot down onto the SWAT unit's arm with a satisfying crunch, severing the link. He collected what he deduced to be spare clips from the android's body and then picked up the pulse rifle.

"Combat protocols engaged," the hazard suit's A.I. announced. "Munitions monitoring system: online. Life signs analysis system: online. Targeting assistance: online. Have a very safe day."

Oh, the irony, Gordon thought to himself as he ran down the hallway.