Proposal
After a moment or two, or maybe an eternity, neither of them could tell, their lips parted. House looked into the sad grey eyes one more time and said "I'm sorry." Not waiting for an answer he turned around and walked out of her office.
James Wilson didn't look up when hearing the door opened and closed again. He knew who the visitor was, as he was the only person who always walked into his office without knocking. 'I will really miss this', he thought waiting for him to start the conversation, but the unexpected silence made him wonder and finally he looked at House. He wanted to ask something like 'What are you doing in my office again?' but then he saw his face. Though he knew about the discharge, the look on House's face was unexpected. He opened his mouth and closed it without a sound. He knew that House should feel miserable, but he also saw some other emotions in his eyes, sadness, maybe.
The two men were just staring at each other. Neither of them knew what to say.
"I got a letter from Stacy", he broke the silence. "She have divorced and wants me to visit her. She says she is still in love with me."
"Wow", Wilson said.
"And Cuddy told me that the Board is firing me", he continued without the wish for any coherence.
"Well, I...", Wilson tried to answer.
"Then I kissed her", he finished his fuzzy sentences.
"Wow."
"You are annoying", he cried out.
"Sorry. But...", Wilson tried to put the thoughts together. "You say that your ex-girlfriend asked you to start it over again. For the third time?"
"Yes."
"And your boss, with whom you are in love with", House gave him a flustered look so he had to correct the words, "okay, who you like, told you that you lost your job. And you kissed her as an answer?"
"Yes."
"Wow."
"I see I won't get any help from you", House said and turned to leave.
"Wait." House stopped looking back to his only friend. "What are you doing now?", Wilson asked.
"That's why I'm here. 'Cause I don't know what to do.", he said somewhat really sadly. "The Board's decision seems to be final", he continued. 'I know it from Cuddy's crying', he thought. He didn't want to tell Wilson how Cuddy reacted to his discharge. 'He will find out anyway', he told to himself.
"So, you are leaving?"
"I think so. But don't really know what to do.", he said. He was not a fool to think that any other hospital would give him a chance after he was fired from PPTH. Only Cuddy was so idealistic 'fool', he thought, to think that he can be civilised. 'Well, she was wrong, anyway.'
"House", he realised where he was and that Wilson was staring at him.
"I have a lot to do", he said going to the door again.
"Do you want to come for dinner?", Wilson asked suddenly. "Maybe we can..."
"Thank you, Wilson", he answered, "but I'd rather be alone now."
"Just think about it." House walked away without an answer.
Lisa Cuddy was sitting in her office thinking about House's discharge, their relationship and the kiss. 'Coward', she thought, 'You can not do anything but mess up my world.' She felt sad and confused of being sad. 'Why am I feeling this? I have my own life, nothing to do with him any more', she thought. Her phone began to ring. 'Good. I need more complications today', she told to herself recognising the ring tone.
"Hello", she answered the phone.
"Hi, Lisa", he said not realising the sadness in her voice, "I was wondering if you had time for a fast lunch with me."
Silence.
"Lisa?"
"Oh, yes", she tried not to sound as confused as she was, "yes, Lucas, this is a great idea. I'll have a lunch break in an hour."
"All right, meet me at the entrance of the hospital", he said, "I'll bring you somewhere."
"Sounds good", she said.
"All right then, see you there in an hour", he hung up the phone.
She stared at her desk again. 'Maybe it's a makeup lunch', she said to herself recalling the last night at home.
"Come on, honey, say 'Daddy'", she told to her 18 months daughter, "D.A.D.D.Y".
"It's all right, Lisa", Lucas said, "let her play."
"Mommy", Rachel said.
"Yes, darling?"
"Come play?"
"Of course, I come", Lisa said, "I'll just finish cooking."
"Till that, go and play with Lucas...", she saw Lucas watching, "Daddy", she said with more than necessary stress on the word. At that very moment, she knew it was a mistake. Rachel turned around and ran into her room. 'What shall I do now?', she thought.
"I'll finish cooking, honey", Lucas said, "just go and talk to her."
She knocked on her door and entered. Rachel was sitting on the floor playing with some of her toys.
"Darling, what is the problem?", Lisa asked.
"I want to play with you, Mommy, not with Lucas."
'Why can't she call him Daddy after all?', she wandered, 'she knew nobody else to call Daddy. Maybe she feels something bad about it. Stop, Lisa. What are you thinking? Lucas lives here for more then six months, he is like her dad. But then, what is her problem?'
"But, honey, Luc.. I mean, daddy would like to play with you", she tried.
"He is not my daddy", she cried out.
"But, Rachel...", Lisa didn't understand where she heard this. Not form her, she was sure.
"Annie said, that daddies are mommies' husbands." Oh, the babysitter told her so.
"Darling..."
"Is Lucas your husband, Mommy?", Rachel asked. 'How will she explain it to her?'
"Well, honey, no. Lucas is not my husband", she started, didn't even know how to continue, "but he loves you as he was your daddy."
"But he is not", she said. Lisa realised that in Rachel's mind daddy is someone, who marries mommy and he doesn't have anything to do with blood or genes.
"All right honey," she answered finally, "will you come out to us?" Rachel nodded.
"Okay, we will be waiting for you", she kissed her daughter and stood up to leave when she realised that Lucas was standing at the door. She tried to smile but he didn't smile back.
"Maybe, we should change the babysitter", he said turning around.
"Or maybe we should tell her the truth", Lisa argued.
"What truth?", Lucas became curious, "That I am not her father? Or that you are not her mother either?" He knew it was a stupid thing to tell this, but it just slipped out. Lisa turned angry.
"I AM her mother", she shouted.
"Right", he said, "well, I think it's time for me to go. I will call you tomorrow."
"Lucas..."
"No, Lisa. I have to be alone, thinking", he said. "Good night." He closed the door behind him.
'Maybe it was not a bad idea, that he didn't sell his apartment', she thought. This was the first time that an argument ended with him leaving. She didn't want to let him go, but she didn't do or say anything to make him stay. She realised it just right at this moment. She didn't even know how they really got to the argument. It seemed so stupid now. She sighed and stood up. It was time to meet Lucas.
'Hey', he said kissing her on the cheek. Cuddy noticed that he didn't want to kiss her on the lips, but didn't say anything. 'Maybe, this is the end', she thought. It was the usual story. She always made some mistakes which resulted the man run away from her. She finally got used to it. 'So, let it be', she sighed.
"Hi, Lucas", she said.
They went to a really nice place, a French restaurant which Lisa liked and was not too far from the hospital. 'Maybe the place is for to compensate the brake up', she thought. They didn't talk much during the lunch, barely looking at each other. At the end, Lucas payed the bill, and they started to walk back to the hospital.
"Lisa", he finally broke the silence. 'The moment of truth', she thought. "Lisa, I was thinking about yesterday. All the things you and Rachel told and..."
"Lucas, I'm..."
"Please, let me finish", he asked. She remained silent, just nodded. Lucas didn't smile. "I always told you that it's okay if Rachel doesn't call me daddy."
"Lucas..."
"Lisa, please. I was confused about my feelings and didn't realised how much it would mean if she did so. And yesterday, when she told that I am not her daddy, I had to think about our relationship.", he stopped for a moment. 'Here we go', she thought. But at that very moment Lucas get a small box out from his packet and started to speak again.
"I realised, that there is only one way to make all the three of us happy", he smiled now, "Lisa Cuddy. I love you with all my heart. Will you marry me?"
She expected butterflies in her stomach and tears in her eyes, but none of them came. She was only surprised. 'Lisa, you have to tell something', she reminded herself.
"Lucas", she started, "I am... I don't know what to say", she was nervous. "To tell you the truth, after our argument yesterday I expected that you will break up with me, not propose. I wasn't ready for this. I can't answer this question right now. I have to...", there were those tears now.
"Lisa", ha looked at her confused, but still smiling, "I understand. You don't have to answer right now. You can think about is as long as you need so. I will love you then and I will waiting for you."
She walked alone into the building, didn't know what to do. After a while, she realised that she was walking pointlessly from one corridor to the other. Then she suddenly stopped at a door. She had no clue what she was doing here, but she finally knocked.
"Come in", a male voice called.
"Can I talk to you for a moment?", she asked.
James Wilson looked up from his papers. He saw his boss in front of him with a desperate look on her face. 'House, what else did you do?', he thought, though he knew that the kiss itself could cause Cuddy's bad mood. He didn't know what to say, so waited for her to start instead.
"Lucas asked me to marry him", she finally said after a long silence.
"Well...", he was even more confused than her if it was possible, "I would congratulate you, but from your look I assume, that the situation is a bit more complicated." She nodded.
"So, you didn't answer", he guessed.
"No", she said desperately, "I can't. I mean, I could expect this, I mean the proposal as we are together for a year, but it was even so sudden. I just..."
"You just thought that somebody else will make a move", he finished her sentence.
"I...", she could not answer.
"Cuddy, with all my respect, what did you expected?", he asked, "You told House that he had no chance a year ago. He still has feelings for you, but how did you expect something from him after moving in with Lucas?"
"I don't know", she said with tears in her eyes, "I just...after that kiss today I..."
"Hoped that he will propose?" Is sounded rather irrational. 'What was I really expected?' she thought.
"Maybe I..."
"And that's why you didn't answer Lucas?", he asked.
"Maybe, yes", she said, "and the butterflies...", she added.
"What butterflies?", he started to get lost.
"Oh", she said, "It's not important."
"Lisa, if you want my advice", he said, "do not say yes till you don't mean it. Believe me, I have experiences in bad marriages and those seemed to be good marriages in the beginning. Don't do anything that makes you feel miserable just because you think you have to do so. You deserve happiness. And if you feel that is is not by Lucas' side, then you should not marry him."
"Thank you, Wilson", she told him, "I don't know what I feel now. Maybe it was just too sudden and I only need some more time..."
"If you think so..."
"Well...", she never finished the sentence. "Good bye, Wilson." She left the office.
"Good bye, Cuddy", he didn't know if she heard it.
'Maybe I should fill an application for Psychiatry', he thought, "With my experiences as a therapist, I will definitely get the job." He stood up with a sigh.
Gregory House was playing with his great tennis ball in his office when Wilson knocked on his door.
"It's open", he said not turning to him.
"How are you?", his only friend asked. He wanted to be sure if the news he wanted to tell him won't be too much. He looked miserable. 'It was not a good idea to come here now', he told himself, 'but maybe the fact that Cuddy didn't answer...'
"What do you want, Wilson", House asked angrily, "I told you I want to be alone."
"I talked to Cuddy", he said.
"And?", he asked with some curiosity in his voice.
"She didn't tell much about your kiss", he didn't know how to tell him, "she talked about, well, something else."
"What?"
"Lucas proposed", he tried to get rid of it as soon as possible. House looked at him as he got a hit in his stomach right at the moment.
"And why do you tell this to me?", he sounded desperate, "You don't expect me to go and congratulate, do you?"
"She didn't answer". House became excited. 'Maybe... no, that's nonsense. She just needs to think it over like any other woman.'
"House", Wilson nearly shouted, "she told me she doesn't know what to do. She even referred to something like she was waiting for some move from a certain someone", he said. "Maybe you should talk to her."
"Or maybe you should stop manipulating people", House cried out. "Now, get out of here. I told you I want to be alone." Wilson left his office with an 'I should expect this reaction' look on his face.
House left his office some minutes after Wilson. 'I need to talk to her', he thought, 'I must tell her that...' He stopped at Cuddy's office. She sat at her desk. He knocked. When entering the office he saw the surprise on Cuddy's face. He never knocked on her door before.
"I've heard that you are getting married", what a pathetic start of a conversation?
"I didn't answer yet", she said looking for something in his blue eyes. Anything which she could interpret as confession, or at least as some feeling. Maybe she saw something, but she wasn't sure.
"Why?", he asked.
"Why did I not answer?", come on, House, just tell me to answer him NO.
"Why do you think about answering him no?" Cuddy felt a sudden fear growing inside her chest.
"Do you suggest me to answer yes?", she asked.
"Maybe you should", why am telling you this?
"Yes, maybe I should", she wondered.
"Do you want me to stop you?", please tell that you do. Lisa looked at him and saw the challenge in his eyes.
"Do you want to stop me?" These conversations were always full of their riddles. It was much more a game than a conversation.
"You told me a year ago that I have no chance", he said with a rather sad voice, "Did you change your mind so sudden?" He walked to her looking directly in her eyes. "Tell me, Lisa. Tell me that you want me to stop you." Cuddy stood up so he can smell her perfume again. He thought he will go crazy by this woman. He desperately wanted to kiss her. Cuddy seemed scared but waiting for him to kiss her.
"I not gonna kiss you any more if you don't ask me to do so", he broke the silence and grinned.
"How dare you?", she became really angry now. "How dare you walk in time after time and act as you had the right to make my life miserable?"
"You are the one in love with me, who fools herself with marrying someone else and doesn't want to give me a chance", he argued, "You live with that jerk, but want me to make confessions?"
"I live with Lucas, because I love him. And you are much more of a jerk than him", she wanted to cry. "And I will definitely marry him. And there is nothing you can do about it."
"All right", he said and left her alone. 'Maybe I should think of Stacy's offer', he thought.