Hey hey people of the fanfiction nation, sorry about the long update, it was actually done ages ago but Catherine, the real person this story was dedicated to, was being gay and

Seth took my bags, all of them might I add, and carried them up to the guest room/my room, While I just stood in the lounge room like a penguin on speed, coming down after a massive high. Believe me. It can be done. Sue was in the kitchen attending to Seth's hunger needs.

She then came out with a tray. There were two bowls both equally sized in a size so large it could feed all the 4th world countries in the world. I learnt all about that in science. Just joking there is no such thing as 4th world children. I meant 5th.

But my spazzy thoughts were interrupted by that oversize bowl of spaghetti being placed in front of my now sitting body. I let my mouth drop. I was not going to be able to eat that. I quickly closed my mouth. My mum kept telling me to be careful or I might swallow a fly, and believe me, I've been there done that, got the t shirt. Actually I wonder if I packed it.

Sue looked at me and gestured toward the food

"Sue, I'm hungry, I'll admit, but no way in Hell, am I that hungry," I said in a tone that my mother would not have approved of.

Seth ran down the stairs at that very moment. Having heard my interesting predicament he was nice enough to say;

"No need to worry Leah's replacement. I'll eat what you don't," and to his mother, "I like her better than Leah already, finally I can eat like a king," he said with glee.

"And you don't already Seth?" I said mockingly.

"Hey, leave me alone, and that's it forget your food, you're going to bed. You are obviously too jet lagged to tell what is large and what is not, and that little bowl is not," he stated referring to the mountain next to mine.

"Seth. You will not treat our guest like you treat you sister." Sue exclaimed.

"But mum you said that when she arrived we had to make her feel like part of the family, that's what I was doing. So Catherine, how old are you?" he asked through a mouthful of spaghetti.

"A hundred and thirty two," I said with a smile.

"Wow," He answered, "Are you a vampire?" He asked jokingly but with a hint of seriousness that I couldn't place.

"Darn my covers blown," I answered in a monotone with a southern accent.

Sue smiled at me but Seth went all rigid and then said through gritted teeth,

"I kill you."

I just smiled at him. He was sitting on a blue La-Z-Boy which I thought was just too cool. Sue was sitting on a red one and there was a spare purple one. I smiled.

"Ooh purple, dibbs," I said referring to the La-Z-Boy.

"See mum we don't even need Leah, she even can sit in her spot. We never have to have that bit-"

Sue cut him off with a cough. The boy smiled sheepishly at his mother.

"Come with me dear, you look so tired. Let me show you to your room." Sue said kindly.

I nodded my head said goodnight to my La-Z-Boy. I gave it a hug and then gave Seth a wave of farewell. I looked longingly at my new chair one more time before heading upstairs.

I walked down the hall. The walls were painted a creamy colour and the furniture was simple. There were pictures on the wall and I noticed a picture of Sue, Seth, some man and a pissed looking girl. She was really pretty...cept for the glare.

"Sue, who is in this picture?" I asked gesturing to the black frame.

"Oh that's me, there is Seth. That was before he...yeah, that's Leah just after her boyfriend left her and that's harry, my husband, he passed away a few months back," she said in a quiet voice.

I instantly felt bad. I honestly had not meant to pry.

"Oh Sue, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pr-"

But she cut me off.

"It's ok, it's best to get it out now. I mean, you're practically family for the next year," she gushed with a smile.

I giggled and continued up the stairway to my new room. I walked in and started squealing like an otter at penguin parade. The cupboards were black, the desk was black, and the dressing table was black. I had a black mattress thing under the window. You know how in movies there it a big window and a seat thing under it. So cool. I looked at the bed it was a queen with a black and pink cover. I squealed louder if possible. Took out my favourite pink rug from a bag Seth had already brought up and threw it on my bed and then flopped.

Sue was laughing at my little outburst.

"Goodnight Catherine," she said, struggling to get the words out through her laughter.

Just then, Seth barged in with a vacuum on his back and a Ghostbusters t-shirt.

"See mum I told you this place was haunted now. Who ya gonna call...Seth, the ghost slayer!"

He looked like such a dork.

"Catherine what are you doing in bed? It's like 12 o'clock." He asked while vacuuming random spots near my bed.

"It's 9 in Australia and I haven't slept properly in two days so if you please," I said gesturing towards the door.

"No!" Sue interrupted "He's vacuuming for one in his life lets enjoy this while it lasts."

"And that is my cue to leave; I have to meet Sam anyway so... See ya round Cath," he said.

"It's Cat. My friends call me Cat," I told him as he rolled his eyes and walked out the door.

"Night," Sue said as she shut the door and turned off the lights.

As soon as they were gone I darted to the same bag that had my rug, grabbed out my toy horse, Patch. I loved her to bits and snuggled into her. Ugh, I just remembered how Shannon used her as a face cloth once. I pushed her away from me but then I remembered how I had threatened her with the death of her stuffed animal-Snoopy- we gave both our teddies a wash outside that day. We were fourteen. Yup time to sleep. I snuggled under the doona and checked that I had three pillows, what would I do with the fourth? I smiled and gave it to my horse.

"Night Patchy babe," I whispered before passing out.

When I awoke, I assure you it was not on my own terms. That darned sun was just so persistent. Note to self, get thicker curtains. I grabbed my phone. It was ten thirty. This was practically criminal; I should not be up this early. I groaned, so not good. I then realised I had slept for almost a full day and well Mother Nature was calling. That and the fact I really needed to clean my teeth.

I stood up and instantly regretted it.

"Whoa head rush," I mumbled.

I then waddled out of my room to the bathroom. After attending to my...mandatory needs, I went back to my room to grab my shower stuff. I loved how I knew where all the rooms even though I never got a tour. It might have been the signs that read toilet and bathroom on the front of the doors but I think it was just my intuition. Man I'm an awesome psychic.

After my shower I looked in the mirror and squealed again. When my hair was wet it almost touched my ass. Soo cool. I brushed my teeth and headed back to my room. In a towel, might I add. And no it was not pink and fluffy. It was blue and fluffy. Once I was dresses. I put on my black converse, black skinny's that were too skinny and my ripped up Ghostbusters shirt that was all cut and tied. I decided to tackle my hair. I straightened it with my 270 degree Diva hair iron and put in my moo goo for my scalp condition and put on my usual amount of eyeliner. It was a lot. I then decided I was ready to tackle the world that was La Push.

Wow I had a long morning routine. Poor Shannon, she would come over every morning before school and I now feel for what she had to go through.

I giggled at the memory of our awesome lateness. I picked up a random cereal box and smiled. Rice Crispi's. It was Rice Bubbles in Australia. Shannon was from South Africa and they had Rice Crispi's there, I looked around to check that no one was looking and introduced myself.

"Hello Snap, Crackle and Pop. My name is Catherine, I have been a fan of your work for a while now and-"

"I thought it was just 'cause you were jet lagged but apparently you're this wacky always." Came a voice from behind me.

"Shut up Seth," I answered.

"It's just Rice Crispi's, what is so good about it? I'd prefer Coco Pops," he said now coming into view.

"It's just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy." I sang.

"I find your shirt ironic," he said with a knowing smirk.

I glanced at my Ghostbusters shirt. I smiled at the memory of last well yesterday morning.

"Ghostbusters for the win," I replied while pouring my cereal.

"So school tomorrow. Ugh," he said.

"I actually already started year 11 in Australia, you guys are just behind," I said.

"Or ahead."

"No Seth that's not the way it works," I said.

"Wait I'm confused. You're from Australia, why have you already started 11th grade?"

"I started year 11 because it's different. Sheesh, it's not rocket science, you don't have to be Hitler to understand it."

"Why Hitler?"

"I don't know it was the first thing that came to mind."

"I always wondered what his last name was."

"Who?"

"Hitler."

"Wow, I am not tutoring you in history."

"Why would you need to?"

I gave him a look that read plain sympathy before leaving to call Shannon.

My phone had 17 texts from her all referring to me being raped.

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I woke the next morning and completed my morning routine. I looked outside the window and checked the forecast. It would only be 27 today. Semi-warm I guess but nothing compared to Australia. Man, Broken Hill was an oven during summer. I looked in my now arranged cupboard, I know right that was quick but I had to do something while Shannon was going over safety pre-cautions for not being raped and complaining about how late it was. I decided to go all out for this new school. Now what would I wear? We had uniforms in Australia and it was just so darn hard to be allowed to wear anything, curse you choices.

Hmm, I wonder. I snuck into Seth's room, in my pyjamas might I add and saw the sleeping body lying on the bed and with no blankets, he must be cold. I reached out and felt his arm; no he was hot, in both ways of the word. I snuck over to his cupboard, and decided to be all superspy. I knew he could not hear me over all the snoring but I still tried to be as quite as possible. I did a commando roll and started humming the theme song to mission impossible. I silently opened the door and gasped in horror at the mess that was his cupboard. For crying out loud there was toast in it! Toast in the cupboard, wrong on so many levels. I shuddered. I then reached to the top and grabbed a black shirt of his that read:

Welcome to 2012 congratulations you're not dead...yet.

I smiled. It would be the perfect oversize shirt, I just had to adjust it so I could have it hanging lopsided I smiled and did a Toyota jump in accomplishment.

As I landed on the floor a pair of boiling hot arms rounded my waist. It couldn't be Seth because he was right in-front of me.

"And what are you doing with that shirt?" said a deep man's voice.

I was so scared. All Shannon's lessons came back to me in a flash and I screamed.

"Raaaape! Seth get up you dick head, I'm being raped!" I screamed.

The pair of arms loosened their grip on me and I smiled. It was a start, scare him off. Wait now what oh yes. I dropped to the floor and began rolling well continuing to scream rape. I grabbed the t-shirt and clutched it to my fair torso. I mean I needed my alibi. Wait is that right?

"Help me Shannon! Please, I'm sorry, I should have listened! I don't wanna be raped!" I started wailing.

"Catherine. What. Are. You. Doing?"Came the sleep filled voice of Seth.

"Stopping, dropping and rolling!" I replied continuing to roll around. I ran into something wet and I blanched. I could only imagine what wet monstrosity would be...oh the possibility.

"Isn't that for fire?" Came that same man's voice. I opened the eyes, I did not realise were shut and came face to face with a black converse, a wet one at that. Oh well, that makes sense. A shoe. I looked up at the source. It was a man that looked eerily similar to Seth. But somewhat younger and more hyperactive, is that possible? Anyway...

"Are you a rapist?" I whispered.

He came down to my level

"No," he whispered back "I'm Seth's friend Collin, but sometimes I do feel a bit like the moon if that counts."

"Wait; was that a reference to the Mighty Boosh? What with him being a vanilla rapist and people hiding their kids from him?" I asked.

"You get it! Oh I love you," he said while pulling me into a hug and then picked me up so I was dangling held only by his bone crunching hug.

"Can't. Breathe." I replied.

He laughed and put me down.

"So a Boosh fan hey?" he asked with a smile.

"Nope can't stand it. It's funny and all but my friend Amanda got really into it back home and everyone had been singing Isolation and the 4 way Crimp for so long that you just get over it," I said

His face seemed to lose most of its enthusiasm when I mentioned I was not a fan.

"Hmm, that's a bit upsetting. I thought I had finally met someone to obsess with. I like obsessing. It's one of my many obsessions," he said through a queer little smile.

Well if he was not a rapist he certainly was weird. He'd get along well with Shannon.

"So back to the matter at hand, why are you in my room?" asked Seth.

"I wanted to borrow a shirt," I replied nervously. He looked pissed.

"And you thought you could just waltz in here and take it, while I was defenceless and asleep?" he said.

"Technically that's the same," I started.

"Collin, get the shirt," he interrupted.

"No! I need an oversize black shirt to go with my black skinnies and I don't have a black oversize," I whined.

He snorted "And that's going to make me give you my favourite shirt?" he said.

It was Collin's turn to snort. "Dude Leah got you that for your birthday and you swore you would never ever touch it. Hence the fact it's the only thing clean in your cupboard."

He moved towards the cupboard and pointed at a green shirt. "For crying out loud that's green pizza."

I gasped "EWWWW! I thought it was a shirt, oh and there's toast there too."

"Nah that's still good," said Collin before shoving in whole in his mouth.

Oh that was wrong in so many ways.

"You. Have. Issues." I said, "You're gonna die. Moulds gonna grow in your body."

"Noo," Seth said in a singsong voice, "It's only two days old. Still good."

"Yeah," agreed Collin. Then they bumped fists like two penguins at a fish eating contest.

Speaking of which, smile and wave Cat, smile and wave. I ran out the room.

Once I was dressed, my eyeliner was more than noticeable and my knee high converse were laced up and tucked in, I went downstairs to engage in my awesome breakfast that was nothing. I was on a diet. My bum was too big. Shannon keeps saying that it's all muscle and I can't lose it. But I gained a kilo and I now weigh 53! Awful I know.

I smelt bacon. Oh no! My only weakness, actually I think anything would be my weakness right now. I was that hungry.

Ok, I'll start my diet tomorrow, I will, no matter what. Wild horses couldn't drag me away from no food and no Shannon or Mark, my step dad, to tease me about my big bum.

After eating my bacon- I was good and cut the fat off, which I was sure Seth would inhale when he came downstairs- I went upstairs to look in the full length mirror in the hallway.

I had ended up wearing my black skinny legs, my tight purple long sleeved shirt with lots of weird zips, a black army coat thing that was basically a Goth jacket toned down enough for everyday use and my purple converse that looked like they had black paint plashed on them. My hair was perfectly messy and I was very happy with my complexion. I was ready.