I hope you liked the first chapter, here is the second.
Oh and of course I don't own anything Narnia related, except for for this story. It all belongs to C.S. Lewis!!

Searching

Two days later, Caspian and I sat out to search for Aslan. We had decided that it would be best to go by ourselves as Aslan had a habit of showing himself to only a few and count on them to spread the word of his return.

"Which way shall you go, King?" one of Caspian's counsellors asked him. Only few of the counsellors had agreed with our choice to go alone on this journey, they feared for the loss of their king. Caspian looked at me for an answer, for this we had not discussed.

"Which ever way the wind takes us, good counsellor," I answered the centaur. "When one wants to find Aslan or any answers, one must always follow their heart."

"Of course, good Queen," the centaur replied.

The centaur stepped back as Caspian asked, "And which way does the wind take us now?"

"Can't you feel it? It's this way," I smiled as I spurred on my horse and rode off.

Caspian followed me as I galloped away; he didn't seem to try to catch up to me, though I knew he could. For awhile I guided us south along the coastline and then west into the forest.

"You must really want to find Aslan or a way to get out of Narnia for you to ride in such a hurry," Caspian said as he, at last, caught up to me. His words were full of hurt and so too, I saw, was his face.

"It's not that I want to leave Narnia, truly it is not," I said, looking him in the eye, hoping that he would see the truth in mine. "However, I do want to know why I am here. It has never taken us more than a couple of hours to find out why were called to Narnia. But now I have been here for almost four days and I still have no idea why I am here or how I got here."

As I spoke, we made our way out of the thicket of the forest and entered upon a large field.

"Did you bring us here on purpose?" Caspian asked as he realised what this field was.

"Not really," I said. "I followed my heart and the wind and this is where it let me." We had come upon Beruna, the grounds upon we defeated the White Witch so many years ago.

"Has it been long since you were here?" Caspian asked after he dismounted.

"Depends," I smiled. His face showed misunderstanding. "It depends on which time you use; Narnia time or the time from my world. But yes, it feels like a very long time ago."

We walked across the land that so long ago was covered in blood. My feet remembered the earth and let me to the point where I had stood when I shot the dwarf that wanted to kill Edmund.

"Did you know that I shot only one arrow during the battle here?" I asked Caspian. "That dwarf was the last to die on that day."

"There was enough death on that day to last for a very long time," Caspian responded. "It doesn't matter who killed first or who killed last, too much blood was lost that day."

I slowly walked around, as the events of that day so long ago came back to my mind as if it had all happened only yesterday.

"Let's move on," I said after awhile. "This place holds no answers, only memories."

"Are you sure the memories hold no answers?"

"Not yet," I answered and Caspian nodded.

We remounted our horses and this time Caspian lead the way. He rode to the river and followed it upstream to the north. We continued in this direction for some time, sometimes talking while keeping our thought to ourselves on other times.

"Do you have a destination in mind for tonight or are we going to follow the river till nightfall?" I asked as I saw that the sun was lowering in the western sky.

"I was following the wind as you call it, but there is a decent place where we can spend the night on this path," Caspian replied.

And indeed, it didn't take long before a castle came into view. I instantly recognized it as the castle that had served as the home of Caspian's forefathers. We spurred on our horses again and quickly galloped to the castle.

"I had wondered what you had done with this place," I said as we dismounted and lead the horses into the stables.

The castle appeared empty except for a few housekeepers and a small kitchen staff.

"After Aslan restored Cair Paravel I choose it as my home instead of this castle where I was raised," Caspian explained. "For most Narnians this place holds too many unpleasant feelings, and I felt it was important to show them that I was not like my uncle. I come here sometimes, to get away from a meeting or to remember my parents."

"It seems today has been a day of memories for the both of us," I thought out loud.

"Yes, it seems so."

That night I thought about why I had taken the road to Beruna of all places. I still had a clear memory of the days when my brothers and sister and I ruled over Narnia. It had all started with that weird wardrobe and sadly it had ended there too. But so much happened between start and end, so many amazing years were spend here in Narnia. I was glad for all the years of peace we had here, compared to the few times we had had to go to war. I also clearly remembered the amount of kings and princes that asked for my hand, to become their queen. I just as clearly remembered turning them all down. None of them had ever caught my eye and Narnia had been much too dear to me to leave it behind for anyone. And now I was back in Narnia, for the third time, and I had no idea how long I could stay this time.

My thoughts wondered back to the battle of Beruna and as clear as I remembered that day, I also remembered the fear. The fear of losing those I loved, Peter and Edmund but also mister and mss Beaver and the others who had helped us to find our way in Narnia.

I had felt that fear again not too long ago when we fought with Miraz' army. I had had confidence in Peter and Edmund's skill with their sword, but I was unsure of Caspian's. When Miraz' first garrison attack I watched Caspian fight and had mentally told him to turn around when a soldier got behind him. And when I had joined their fight, I had made sure to keep a constant look out for Caspian, knowing that he had to be the future of Narnia. If it hadn't been for Lucy we would have lost the battle at Aslan's How. For it had not been the swords that won that battle, it had been the trees who had awakened from their sleep.

Two battles, we had fought, save Narnia from those who claimed it as their own. After one, we were able to stay; after the other we were meant to leave. At yet, here I was again, this time without my siblings. And so far I had spent all my time thinking. It wasn't the way I wanted to spend my time here in Narnia, but it is what Caspian had asked me to do. However, the more I though about what that kiss meant to me, the more I wondered what it meant to Caspian.

The next morning I walked through the empty castle and came upon the very place where we had last left Narnia to return to our own world. My eyes wondered from the crossed trees to the spot where I had kissed Caspian. My mind flooded with the memory, sounds and feelings returned to me as if I were back in that moment. It was then that I knew what the kiss had meant to me and why I had done it. The problem now was that I had no idea what Caspian's thoughts were on the kiss. Since I had returned he had urged me to tell him what it meant to me, but so far he had refrained from telling me what it meant to him. I decided then that before I would tell him my feelings I would find out his, for the last thing I wanted to do was make a fool out of myself.

Later that day we rode out again. I led the way to the west, were I believed the beavers ones lived. It took us only an hour to find the location of the dam that no longer existed, though the trees around it were still there. I climbed of my horse and walked around slowly, I looked at the earth underneath my feet, up at the sky above my head and the trees around me. My eyes caught sight of a small patch of earth that was soaking in sunlight; it seemed to be the only bit of this part of the forest floor that was touched by the sun. I sat down on the soft leaves that covered the rich brown earth and closing my eyes I let the sun warm my skin.

"Do you have many memories here?" Caspian's voice broke the silence of the forest. He had remained on his horse, watching me as I moved around.

I opened my eyes and saw that he had finally come off his horse and was walking towards me.

"Not many," I said. "But if it wasn't for the beavers we would have never been able to fight for Narnia, to rule it or to return to it. It were the beavers that convinced us that a big part of our destinies lay here in Narnia."

"Than all Narnians owe much to these beavers," Caspian smiled and I nodded at him. He sat down next to me and again we were silent, drinking in our surroundings. As the silence grew on I decided now would be the best time to ask him. There was no one around from whom we should keep our feelings hidden, no one to whom we were supposed to be royalties, creatures of a higher being, creatures without the need for love or emotion.

"Caspian?" I started not sure how to ask him what I needed to know.

"Yes," he answered, opening his eyes and turning to face me.

"You asked me to think because you wanted to know what our kiss meant to me," the words flowed from my mouth without hesitation now. "Will you tell me what it meant to you?"

While I spoke, Caspian's eyes left mine and wondered to the forest floor.

"I knew you would ask me that before you told me your own feelings upon it," he said. I waited for him to continue, for him to tell me his thoughts, but he remained quiet.

"Caspian?"

"After you left, all I could think about was our kiss. I blew on your horn whenever I could, trying to bring you back to Narnia. But you never came. Days passed and everyone around me moved on with their lives. I kept your horn with me where ever I was but I stopped blowing on it. It seemed that your words had been true, you were never to return to Narnia not even when your own horn called you back," Caspian spoke quietly. "One day I rode out without your horn, I had left it behind on purpose, hoping that leaving it behind would help me to move on. It didn't. The horn was the only thing of yours that I had left and leaving it behind hurt more than I could imagine. From that day I have kept the horn close to me at all times. Narnia was at peace but my heart was not. The day that you came back I blew the horn again for the first time in a long time. My counsellors had called me for another meeting as they believed that I should travel beyond the borders of Narnia, visit the neighbouring countries, and perhaps meet a woman." Caspian rolled his eyes as he spoke about his advisors. I laughed softly as I remembered our advisors who had continued to pressure Peter into marrying.

"I was in the middle of yelling at my counsellors that when I would look for a wife was my own business and not theirs when one of the palace guards came in, saying that you had finally returned to Narnia. I didn't believe him, I had wished for your return so often and always in vain." Caspian brought his eyes back to mine, he smiled. "The moment I heard your voice I was happier than I had been in a long time, though I hardly dared to believe my eyes and ears, you were really here."

I didn't know how to respond to Caspian's story. He had missed me, longed for me, and thought of me almost every moment of every day. I am sure my cheeks reddened when he gazed at me and in embarrassment I turned my eyes away from his face. After only a short moment Caspian brought his hand to my face and gently forced me to look up at him. Softly he touched his lips to mine. At the feel of his lips on mine I lost all apprehension. I knew clearly why I had kissed Caspian when I was about to leave Narnia forever. I loved him and I had not been able to leave without kissing the man I loved. And I loved him still and his lips told me that he loved me too. I threw my arms around him and kissed him back. Slowly I drew Caspian with me to the forest floor, catching the last of the afternoons' sunshine as we kept kissing. I felt his tongue on my lips and greedily opened my mouth. Never had I felt like this before. We kissed for what seemed like forever, neither one of us wanted to stop. As the sunlight left the forest floor we finally released each other from our arms. All too quickly the cold of the night swept through the forest and we hastily rode back to castle.

When morning came we had slept little for we had spent the night talking, talking of our pasts, our childhoods and our childhood dreams. I had told Caspian more about our world, he couldn't imagine things like trains and automobiles or factories.

"Where shall we ride to today?" Caspian asked as we saddled our horses.

"Cair Paravel seems like the right place to go home to," I answered.

"Don't you want to find Aslan anymore and find out why you are here?"

"I think I already know why I am here," I smiled at him, though he looked quizzical. "You called me here; you called for me when I could be the answer to a problem."

"But the horn never worked before, why would it work this time and not before. I needed you before too," Caspian said.

"You thought you needed me before, but you didn't, not really. This time not only you needed me, Narnia needed me to return and so I returned."

It seemed that the true reason for my return finally reached Caspian's brain, for suddenly his face was all smiles and sparkles in his eyes. He had needed me; Narnia had needed me, to be with him.

Caspian rode quickly back to Cair Paravel and by nightfall we reached it. On the road we had decided to keep our relationship to ourselves for now to see if our suspicions for my return were correct, without the whole of Narnia intervening and gossiping. This, however, meant that we could not openly display our affection, which was hard on both of us.

The moment we reached Cair Paravel we started to play our roles, those of present king and ancient queen, though befriended not attached to each other.

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