My Erotic Ambassador
A USUKUS fanfic
Rated M
Warning: Smut/sexual content and slight crackyness because I can. This is the brainchild of a perverted, grounded teenager who wanted to write smut at 8 PM. USUKUS.
By Galgenhumor (FF/AO3) / cl41r3 (Tumblr)

Chapter 2: Do You Have That In 3D?

"I only have 30 minutes until my flight leaves, so make it quick!" Alfred reminded him. Arthur had grabbed the back of his jacket, telling him that he needed to tell him something before he left.

"Well, um... Here." he handed him a nondescript CD. It was labelled "To Alfred, with love from Arthur". How cheesy of him. Arthur looked quite timid and shy as he did so, like innocent-shy.

Alfred raised an eyebrow. "What's this? If this is another video of me talking in my sleep, I don't want it." he frowned. How could he forget that time Arthur showed him this video he recorded of him talking and drooling in his sleep, most likely dreaming about something quite obscene? It mortified Alfred, even if it was just between the two of them.

"It's not. Just take it, you'll like it." he smiled at him, and Alfred believed him. Arthur was quite thankful that he had forgotten what he asked for a few days ago. It would make for a good surprise once he loads it into his laptop or DVD player.

"Yeah, sure, thanks Artie." Alfred grinned and leaned down to give him one last kiss before they parted for three weeks. They've been separated from one another longer than that, of course, but they grew so used to the other's company, it still saddens them when one of them has to leave for work, usually upon the orders of their boss.

"I'll get going now, see ya in three weeks, Artie." he grinned and ruffled his boyfriend's hair (he knew how much Arthur hated it; he just liked to annoy him like that) before leaving, giving him a small wave on the way.

Arthur saw him off before going back home, where he'll be alone for the next few weeks.

Alfred sat on his couch in the living room of his house in the U.S. It was already evening, yet he didn't feel sleepy. Jet lag sometimes didn't affect him, and the fact that he finished off a large bottle of Coke didn't really help.

It's been 3 months since he's returned to this house, though it's not very dusty. Perhaps the cleaning lady he hired still came over to clean the place up. She must have been pleased to clean up less burger wrappers and softdrink cups while Alfred was gone.

He had texted Arthur that he was already home, and all Arthur replied was, "oh great go watch the video now". Alfred grew curious just what this video was about, so he popped the CD inside the DVD player. "Ok ill watch the video now" Alfred texted back. While the video loaded, his phone rang and he could hear the special ringtone he assigned for Arthur's contact number.

"Yo, Artie!" he said into the receiver.

"You're about to watch the video now?" he asked Alfred. The sound of his voice laden with a thick, sleepy British accent made Alfred happy. It was probably past midnight or something there. Just a few hours apart from one another and he missed him already.

"Yeah, it's still loading and oh―! There it is..."

The video began to play. At first it showed and empty bed, then Arthur came into the scene. "Hey Alfred, here's the video you asked me to make for you. I hope you and your right hand'll have a fun ride~." the Arthur on the video said. He was smirking quite deviously. Alfred stared at the TV in shock.

"Artie, you actually did this?" he said in disbelief. He wanted to laugh hysterically into the receiver, but he might hurt Arthur's feelings. He didn't think Arthur would actually go through with this!

"W-well, you said you wanted one to take with you to America!" Arthur answered defiantly. He probably was blushing right now, but Alfred wouldn't know since he couldn't see him.

Alfred fell silent as the Arthur on the screen began stripping. He felt quite hot and bothered watching this. The fact that Arthur actually went through the trouble to do this for him, even if it was a ridiculous request, touched him.

Arthur kept quiet on the other line, waiting for Alfred to react. Alfred wouldn't, because his mind was fixated on his lover's body on the screen.

"Oh, God..." Alfred managed to mutter when Arthur had moaned once. Damn, he's hot., he thought.

Arthur began to stroke himself with his lubed up hand, and Alfred couldn't help but get aroused at the sight of him. He actually wanted to hop back onto the plane and back to Arthur's place. This is so unfair.

"Arthur, you―"

"Shh, just keep watching, love." Arthur interrupted him, smirking into the receiver. Arthur wanted to hear the video play in the background, wanted to hear Alfred's reaction towards it. He hoped Alfred would even please himself to the sight of Arthur's body doing such obscene things on the porn video.

Alfred gulped, his hand going to the zipper of his pants. He honestly couldn't help it. His growing erection was getting quite painful and hard to ignore. He took off his pants and leaned against the couch, holding the phone between his ear and his shoulder as his right hand lightly stroked his clothed member.

Arthur's light moans filled the silence of the dark room which was only illuminated by the television screen. Alfred's breathing turned rapid and hot, and Arthur could hear him from the other side of the line. Needless to say, they were both quite aroused.

Alfred pulled his underwear down, taking his hard cock into his hand. He stroked it a bit more until it became fully erect, before he pumped it in a steady rhythm.

"Mm... You're so hot, babe..." he muttered into his phone. Arthur didn't really say anything, but instead he just blushed.

He watched Arthur insert his lubricated fingers inside himself, his face all flushed and red. Alfred matched his rhythm to Arthur's on the screen, his breath hitching slightly. Alfred felt quite needy now; a simple porno wouldn't satisfy the craving he had for Arthur that moment. "Mmmh..."

"Arthur... I wish you were here..." he muttered, his eyes shutting for a while, and he could only hear the other's breathing onto the receiver and the other's moans in the recording.

"Wh-what are you doing right now, Alfred?" Arthur asked him.

"I-I'm jacking off to your video, silly..." he managed to say. He licked his lips which had turned dry.

"O-oh..." Alfred kept at it. He was almost there... Just a little bit more...

"Alfred...!" Arthur had reached his climax in the video, and the sound of Arthur calling out his name drove him over the edge. "A-Arthur...!" Alfred screamed when he reached his peak, coming a few seconds after Arthur, his cum flowing down his length and onto his hand. He could hear a muffled voice and a sigh on Arthur's end but he chose to ignore it for now.

He let go of himself, wiping his hand on his shirt (he'll put it in the laundry, anyway). He swallowed and waited for the video to end after Arthur's closing words.

"H-how'd you like it...?" Arthur asked him nervously.

"I loved it... You're the best, Artie." Alfred grinned, even if Arthur couldn't see him.

"I-I'm glad."

"What were you doing the whole time you were listening to me?"

"The same as what you were doing..." Arthur admitted. He had to cover his mouth when he came, so that Alfred wouldn't hear him.

"You really are the erotic ambassador." he chuckled.

"Shut up." Arthur rolled his eyes.

"Nah. Anyway, it's probably pretty late there and you should go to sleep. Good night, Artie, I'll call you tomorrow." Alfred smiled as he pulled his pants up.

"All right, good night, Alfred. I miss you." Arthur sighed a bit.

"I miss you too, babe. I love you. Thanks for the porn." he chuckled again.

"You're welcome," Arthur laughed, sounding quite tired on the other end. "I love you too, sweetie. Good night." he said before hanging up.

Damn, Alfred really did have the best boyfriend ever. He smiled to himself as he laid down on the couch, falling asleep when the caffeine wore off.

Author's Notes: Oh wow, I hope I didn't bore you guys or anything? And I'm sorry if it's quite short... I only did this like... 30-45 minutes? Damn. Now I'm sleepy. It's already past midnight. Urk.

It's still not done, though.

Help, why is it so short...

I still want to do more smut chapters, okay. Haha.

Reviews and stuff are appreciated, yes~