A/N:Hey all people from Social Torture,if you're reading this then congrats,you'll get a special treat if you red this and review it...:3 and who doesn't like treats? But anywaysm this is my first story with actually cussing in it so tell me in someone's cuss out phrase doesn't sound exactly right..or suggest me new cursing phrases (i'll be needing them since school is starting again). And just so people know,this is NinjaPrincessHaruka's writing(I'm her right now) andicrazy3477 is my loyal editor and best bud.
So, as usual people R&R,comment,check out our other profiles and stories and give us ideas!
Later! and thanks for reading!
From ninjaprincess-8-2-2011...1:03 am!
Back in Chicago
Alex
Let me say one thing about all this. IT WAS NOT MY FAULT! Nobody went and told Aiden to sing that dumbass jingle and have people falling through our roof. Now I gotta pay for the roof and deal with these extra idiots?
Hell no! That did not come in the job description for being Aiden Gamble's friend.
No way.
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I was sitting on the sofa, fighting with the girl who claimed to be my best friend when it happened.
"AIDEN GIVE ME THE DAMN REMOTE! SAM SAID YOU COULD WATCH SOMETHING AGE APPROPRIATE WHILE HE WENT TO GO GET THE MAIL!"
"SPONGEBOB IS AGE APPROPRIATE. IT'S MEANT FOR PEOPLE SEVEN AND OLDER YOU WHORE! NOW GIMME!"
I tugged harder at the remote and shoved the soles of my seven year old Converse into her side and yanked the remote away from her. She fell on the sofa moaning and clutching her side.
"Aleeeeeeex! You meanie! My piercings are still sore!"
"Piercings? What piercings?"
"I got a corset piercing on my side! See?" She held up the side of her shirt, revealing a set of piercings forming a corset tie on her yellowish skin. I was sorta weirded out and jealous at the same time.
"Aiden put your shirt down. You have nothing there that anyone…..and I mean ANYONE would want to see."
Sam's voice came from the doorway where he was dropping his set of keys on the table before coming over to us, "God, Aiden…what is that? Jeez, I thought all Catholics believed that their body was a temple and that you shouldn't do stuff like that...that…to it."
"Most do, but remember. This is Aiden we're talking about here."
"Oh yeah. Right."
"SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCHES!"
Sam sniggered loudly and turned to the TV, "Now what exactly are we watching here?"
"I was trying to watch SpongeBob but little Miss Prick over there just killed that dream."
"You're 19…act like it!" I turned to the blonde, "Naruto's on. We can watch that."
Sam's face got a look on it and I rolled my eyes. Seriously, he could be so irritable when it came to watching anime.
"Sam, just deal with it." I ignored his hand gesture and turned to Aiden, "You in?"
"ZOMG TOOOOOOOOOOOOTALLY!"
She flopped onto the sofa, squeezing her Itachi plushie as Sam and I stared at her hyperactive goth self.
"There's something wrong with you."
"There's something wrong with you too."
"How so?"
"You're a whore!"
She giggled evilly and Sam had to pull me back from kicking her in her newly pierced sides.
"Alex…stop!"
"Hey, the State farm commercial's on!" Aiden looked at me with hopeful eyes, "It's the one with the panda bear. Do you think that-"
"No….Aiden, we've been over this twenty times. Just because you sing that song and say a human panda bear, L Lawliet will not appear." Sam's voice was tired as he cut off her question and dragged me about ten feet away.
"YOU DON'T KNOW THAT AND YOU KNOW BETTER THSN TO SAY L'S WHOLE NAME! KIRA MIGHT GET HIM!"
The looks Sam and I shared after that was one of the most self-pitying looks we've ever given each other. I could see the thoughts floating in his mind. They were 'What the fuckk is wrong with her today?' and 'Remind me why I deal with her insanity sometimes.' and personal favorite, 'Why did I did I let her eat that sugar today?'
We shook our heads and just stared at her for a minute longer as she stared at us. I sucked in a deep breath and as much as it hurt me on the inside, I decided to be the bigger person and not stoop to her childish antics
"You know what Aiden? Knock yourself out with that State Farm idea. Knock yourself the fuck out with it. I'm going to make a sandwich real quick. You want one Sam?"
He nodded, knowing that I only wanted to escape the wrath of Aiden's current sugar high, "Fuck yes!"
We ran out the living room and into the kitchen, leaning on the countertops as we enjoyed the clean silence of the kitchen.
"What is wrong with her today?"
"She actually went to bed and she had pure sugar for breakfast today." Sam didn't look up as he began to make a the tallest sandwich I'd ever seen, "You shoulda just let her watch SpongeBob. Then she would've shut up."
"So this is my fault? YOU THINK THIS WHOLE FUCKIN DEAL IS MY FAULT? YOU CAN JUST GO TO MOTHERFUCKIN HELL YOU BASTARD. IT'S NOT MY GODDAMn FAULT SHE ACTS LIKE THIS SOMETIMES SHITHEAD AND YOU FUCKING KNOW IT!"
"Calm down! God, I only meant that if you let her watch the damn kiddie show she might've shut up. You're being overly defensive."
I glared at him and he smirked, giving me one of his classic 'I'm more superior looks' and I flipped him off. He rolled his eyes, biting into his sandwich. At that exact moment there was a loud crash and dust filled the house. I shot a glance in fear at Sam who had his sandwich in mid-bite and was looking in horror at me. He dropped it on the counter and followed me as I ran back to the living room.
"What….did Aiden do?"
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Aiden
Hello there. My name's Aiden Gamble, resident Gothic Lolita of this mis-mosh college loft I call a home complete with my pish-posh roomies/friends. Now, something important: No matter what anyone tells you, I most certainly did not purposely bring a class of S-ranked shinobi from a manga into our place, no matter how hot a few of them might be.(The members in question know who I'm talking about.) I really didn't but that jingle was so damn catchy and well my other ideas weren't working and I tried a new ideas and there they were.
Total accident right!
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"You know what Aiden? Knock yourself out with that State Farm idea. Knock yourself the fuck out with it. I'm going to make a sandwich real quick. You want one Sam?"
Alex's face looked as though she had just swallowed a whale along with most of her pride and she walked off with Sam in close tow. I sighed, and nestled into the black sofa cushions and paused the commercial. I stared at the girl holding the panda bear and clutched my fist in determination.
"I will get this State Farm thing to work. Even if it the last goddamn thing I do!" I sat up and began to sing, "Like a good neighbor State Farm is there….with a human panda bear!"
I snapped my fingers and braced myself for the impact of L falling on my body. I clenched my eyes shut and dug my face into the sofa cushions of the couch and waited. And waited. And waited.
"Okay…maybe that was too broad." I sat back up, "Maybe I need to be specific about who I want. Okay! I got this! Let's do it again! Like a good neighbor State Farm is there….with L-sama!" I snapped my fingers again and resumed my former position and waited….and waited…and waited…..and waited. Again, no luck.
"Maybe Sam was right and the State Farm jingle really is just a clever way to advertise quick and convenient car insurance assistance." My face fell and I was ready to climb into the emo hole and die until I saw my Itachi plushie, "Or maybe Death Note isn't associated with State Farm. Maybe Naruto is! Okay! Aiden! Third times the charm! Like a good neighbor State Farm is there….WITH THE AKATSUKI!" I snapped my fingers, but didn't bother to take my defensive position this time.
Which was too bad because this time the whole Akatsuki crew fell right through the living room roof and onto me.
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Sam
See, when we moved up in this loft together I thought I'd get some peace and quiet and some good times with my friends. And normally we do get some relative peace and quiet. (I say relative because, nobody in this house actually is the dictionary definition of normal so we don't know what normal is exactly.) But every so often someone in this house does something stupid. Okay wait let me just cut the shit out of that lie and just tell it like it is. Aiden does something so incredibly stupid that it just disrupts whatever kind of normal schedule and life Alex and I were trying to have and just sends it up like a shack in a hurricane.
Like this whole situation….
(and just for the record…I DON'T CARE WHAT AIDEN SAYS…..THIS WHOLE DAMN THING IS HER FUCKING FAULT!)
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Alex and I ran into the living room, expecting to see Aiden sitting on the sofa with another bomb in her hand, ready to blow up the house. Instead we find a hole in the roof, a mass of red and black cloaks and Aiden was nowhere to be found. I placed a hand to my temples and rubbed them slightly. Alex went over to the pile and began to nudge it with her foot.
"Uh….hello? Anybody home?"
"GET YOU FOOT OUT OF MY FUCKIN FACE YOU ASSHOLE!"
"HIDAN SHUT THE HELL UP! YOU'RE SCREAMING IN MY EAR!"
"Tobi hurts Deidara-senpai."
"Kami's Kisame, get that sword out of my face!"
Alex looked at me and I saw her face go a bit slack jawed as Hidan pulled himself off the very tip of the pile. He stared at Alex.
"Oi, Kakuzu! Who the hell's this bitch?"
Alex's eye was twitching and I could tell that she wanted to punt Hidan into Canada.
"What bitch?" Kakuzu's voice became clearer as other Akatsuki began to pull themselves up and dust themselves off, "Oh….that one."
"WHAT THE FUCK MAN! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO THE HELL I AM YOU AND YOU GO OFF MAKING COMMENTS LIKE THAT? YOU DIPSHIT!"
"DIPSHIT YOU SKANK! DO YOU KNOW WHO THE MOTHERFUCKIN HELL I AM?"
"YEAH I FUCKIN DO! YOU'RE NAME'S ASSWIPE!"
Kakuzu and Kisame sniggered loudly and Hidan glared at Alex, "Whore, say that again…..I'll kill you're ass dead."
I covered Alex's mouth before she could say another word and frowned; normally it was Aiden who did that kind of stuff.
"Alex…..be quiet…..you could just get us all killed." I glanced around, "Where's your leader?"
"Over there, yeah." Deidara pointed over to a orange haired man dusting himself off. The other Akatsuki flocked to him and I pulled Alex aside.
"What….are they doing here!" I hissed, my eyes still on the group of apparent ninjas, "And more importantly….where's Aiden!"
"Don't look at me. I don't have all the answers."
"Some help you are."
She punched me in the arm and my slight groan of pain turned the Akatsuki back to us and Pain stepped forward.
"I am Pain."
"Yeah...yeah we know dude. Don't care…..now what we do care about is where our friend went." Alex went over and began shifting Akatsuki members out of their standing positions and looking behind them, "See, Aiden is not a person you want to freak out like this. She won't take it too well."
"Wait, you know who I am?" Pain's voice was surprised as he sent a look at me, "Okay, well where are we….it seems my jutsu misfired."
"Misfired's an understatement."
Itachi's mutter came out from the back and Pain sent over a death glare that obviously implied being sent through a wall.
"Hey, you can't be sending people through my walls, this roofs already gonna cost me a fortune in repairs."
"Finally, someone who understands my pain."
"FOUND YOU!" Alex's shriek of discovery stopped Kakuzu's empathy short as she pulled Aiden out from under the feet of Tobi. She was holding her side and moaning loudly. Pain sighed and held his hand to his head, obviously trying to think.
"My…piercings….hurt….so much."
"Enough with the piercings….can you explain to me and Sam why the Akatsuki are in my living room?"
"AND WHY THERE'S A HOLE IN THE ROOF?"
"That's obviously were the fell stupid. And hey, not cool man, why are you accusing me or sending the Akatsuki are in the living room."
"You're stupid enough to do something like that."
"Am not."
"Are so."
"Am not"
"Are so."
"Am not"
"Congrats Hidan, for once you didn't fuck everything up. Must be a record."
Hidan growled and tackled Kakuzu to the floor, stabbing him demonically while the other Akatsuki chatted and the girls kept arguing. My eye was beginning to twitch off my face and obviously Pain was trying to not Rinnegan the two fighting onto the floor into oblivion as he tried to focus.
"SHUT UP!" Pain and I screamed at together silencing the arguing girls and the chattering Akatsuki. He looked at me and I nodded at him, both of us expressing the same thing in our eyes.
This is gonna be a lot of work handling these two groups.
A/N:Uh,yeah...The statefarm thing...don't ask me what I was thinking when I came up with THAT idea. But it's here and actually I kinda like the idea. Maybe it'll work in real life*goes off does it and sulks back*..No all I got was stupid Bob Barker! I wanted Itachi!
A/N 2: By the way,I just feel as though you should know, I(ninjaprincess) am Aiden and icrazy3477 is Alex. Our male roomie,if he can be considered male at all, Sam,is a former fanfiction nerd whose profile is under toolazytofini...just in case you were wondering... So, i hope you enjoyed this chapter and hopefully more is on the way along with any one shot ideas I get or am asked to write. So,if you got a oneshot idea,message me here or review me somewhere and I'll see what I can do...
Later! And don't foret to R&R!