Disclaimer: I do not Hannah Montana, cos if I did, I'd be rich and I'd probably dance a lot more. I'm just working with the stuff that's between the lines.

Rating: 15+

Pairing: Miley/Lilly

Summary: Lilly tries to pinpoint the exact moment she fell in love with Miley Ray Stewart

Notes: Just a short one, couple of chapters long. Read and Review. Would love to know your feedback. I'm going to be basing some of the fic around episodes, but I'll be playing with them. Changing them a lil bit. Oh yeah.

Chapter 2

She leans down slowly and embraces me in a hug. Tears spring to my eyes as she whispers "You're the best friend a superstar could want, ya know that right?"

"I can't believe you slept with him Miles." I say pushing away from her

"What do you mean? I'm 18 and I love him." Miley says like it's the simplest answer ever "He isn't just some guy I met on the street. I've known him for years Lil." She says, growing impatient

"Exactly! You've known him for years and he's always disappointed you! Let you down. I just don't get how after everything he has done to you how you not only forgive him so easily, but you have sex with him as a reward." I semi yell, trying to rein in my emotions.

"He's changed Lilly! He isn't the same guy he used to be." Miley pleads, her southern accent becoming more prominent the angrier she gets

"You know what Miles?" I say getting up from the bed and walking towards the door "I don't give a shit if he is a different guy, if you had listened to anything I have ever said, you'd realise why I'm upset." I pause by her door handle to stare at her shocked expression

"I guess you're just not the girl you used to be, Miles" I say with a shrug "You're the one that's different."

Things changed after that night. After that moment. After that second. After the words fell from my lips all my walls kinda closed off. I spent more time with Oliver and I spent every single moment possible avoiding Miley.

I couldn't deal with it and I didn't fully get why. I knew I had a mild attraction to Miley, but I felt hurt by her actions.

I didn't talk to Miley for 2 months after that incident, after 1 month Oliver started getting annoyed and curious

Flashback

"Lilly, seriously, this is crazy! You need to make up with Miley." Oliver says

I sigh and head butt the table at Rico's

"Seriously Oliver, we've been over this 1000 times, there is nothing to make up, Miles and I are just drifting apart." I say repeating the same script I've repeated the past month

"I know you better than that Lils." He says dejectedly

"Come on crazy, let's go do something crazy!" I say grabbing Oliver's hand and leading him towards the beach

"Fine, I'm coming with you, but you'll have to tell me eventually." He says with a small smile

I stop and pull him closer to me and place a gentle kiss on his lips "I'm sure I could find some way to take your mind of Miley." I say, hopefully as sensually as I wanted it to

I won't paint you a picture of what happened that afternoon, cos of all the ways my first time played around in my head, I never imagined it would be because I wanted to shut Oliver up.

Shortly after that Oliver and I broke up. It was a mutual thing, Oliver said that he would always see me as a best friend but he didn't think we were in the same place and I told him that I was attracted to girls.

Surprisingly enough he wasn't all that shocked, after the initial 'It wasn't me who turned you?' comment that is.

Flashback

"It wasn't me who, err, ya know, made you gay was it?" Oliver asks nervously

"What?! No!!" I say almost as nervously as him. I haven't fully processed this myself yet

"Phew, you sure? I mean that kinda info can ruin a guys rep." He says jokingly

"Yes I'm sure; trust me it isn't an easy thing to tell someone, let alone your ex-boyfriend who is also your best friend!" I grumble

"Oh" He says smiling at me like he has the answer

"What 'Oh'?" I ask confused, cos I'm pretty sure I don't know the question

"Now I know why you and Miley aren't talking!"

"What? No! Miley doesn't even know! We're not talking for other reasons." I say heatedly

"Ah ha! So you admit it! You and Miley aren't talking?" He beams

"Oh for cryin out loud! No, we're not speaking; we got into a fight about her and Jake." I say "Happy now?"

"Lils –" He says, sitting next to me on my bed, placing his arm over my shoulder "Do you, ya know, have feelings for Miley?" He asks

"Ollie," I sigh, not knowing what to say "I honestly don't know. I don't think so? I mean, I can acknowledge that Miley is really pretty, but I don't think it's anything more than that." I say raking my hand through my hair

I wasn't lying. At the time. At the time I really thought my feelings for Miley were just normal best friend type feelings. Above all else, at the time, I actually really didn't like Miley.

It's funny how that works though, only the people you love the most, can you hate with such passion.

I constantly avoided her. She'd come up and talk to Oliver and I'd walk away. She'd call; I wouldn't answer. She'd text; I wouldn't reply. It was easier this way.

Even after the tabloids were plastered with the news of Jake Ryan cheating on his long time, on again off again, girlfriend; I still didn't get in contact. In my mind she got what she had coming to her. She knew what Jake was like.

You see, it was easier that way. Ignoring her. When Miley wasn't around I could hate her. I could keep the act up. When I'd see her I'd instantly melt, I'd want to say sorry, to make up and I couldn't have that. I was too proud. I knew in my heart of hearts that I was right.

Didn't mean I didn't want to kill Jake Ryan any less. Nope.

Flashback

'Oh come on!' I curse to myself. I'm no good with queues, what's the hold up anyway? All I want is the new Pearl Jam CD, is that such a big ask?

"No fucking way" I mumble to myself, seeing what's causing the big distraction

I push my way through the crowd and make my way to the front

"Jake Ryan." I seethe

"In the flesh baby!" He says turning to face me "Lilly? Wha –"

He is cut off mid sentence by my fist connecting with his face

"Don't call me baby!" I say as he is down on the ground "And so help me Jake" I say, leaning closer, noticing his already swollen lip "If I catch wind of you hurting her again, a swollen lip will be the least of your worries."

I start to storm off, leaving his adorning fans slack jawed and confused

"Hypocrite!" He yells "You think you hurt her any less?"

I stop for a moment, taking in his words, trying to think of a come back. There is none though.

He's right. Jake Ryan is right.

Gah! That's horrible.

It was 2 days after the Jake incident. 2 Weeks after Miley and Jake broke up, 1 Month after Oliver and I broke up and, you know, I came out. And 2 months since my last words were uttered to Miley.

I was in my PJs, watching The Muppets. Mom was in Chicago and had left me the house for a week. I was eating breakfast. It was a Tuesday. It was shortly after 10am.

Flashback

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

I pause my DVDs and put my Count Chocula on the table 'Who the heck? I swear if it's one of them sales guys I'm gonna knock em one' I snicker to myself 'My left hook is getting pretty good'

"Hello- " I say as I open the door only to be pushed past by an angry Miley

"Lillian Marie Truscott!" Miley fumes "You'd better start explaining yourself!" She adds

I look between my pyjamas to my uneaten cereal to the TV then back to Miley.

I'm confused

"No please, come right in Miley." I say with more venom than was intended "What do you want Miley?"

She stands there with one eyebrow raised and her arms crossed over her chest. She's wearing black short shorts and a white tank top with a purple gothic cross on it, just above her right breast. She looks amazing.

"Why Lilly?" Is all she asks and I take the time to look into her eyes, finally seeing the hurt in them

And it dawns on me, this is about him

"Oh my god! After all that he has done, you're still here to fucking ask why?" I ask incredulously "You're unbelievable! Get out!"

She stays still as I continue pointing towards the door

"You're the one who brought him up; I just want to know why?" She asks, still angry "You've ignored me for 2 months, you've been rotten and you've let it be known that you hate me. So explain to me. Why is it when you find out that my boyfriend cheated on me, you deck him?" She moves closer to me, pointing her finger at me "You make NO sense Lilly!"

I sigh and make my way into the lounge room, sitting in front of the TV and pointing at the other sofa, motioning for her to sit down.

"You're right." I say simply "I don't make sense. I've been a complete asshole to you. And I was sure I hated you." I see hurt flash across her face and I instantly feel bad.

I make my way to kneel in front of her and take her hand in mine and she looks away from me, with tears in her eyes

"Look at me Miles." I say and wait for her to look at me "I hurt you cos I was hurt. I don't get the why's and how's but I was and I wanted you to be too. But it's not OK for him to hurt you. The moment I saw him, geez, all these emotions just erupted, the thought of him hurting you just, it hurt me and so I hit him. He deserved it."

"Lilly –" she says slowly, still with hurt in her voice

"No, lemme finish." I take a deep breath "I'm sorry. I really am. So much has happened in the past 2 months and I've really missed my best friend. If there is anyway you could forgive me, I'll promise you that I'll never hurt you again."

"Promise?" She says, smiling at me

"I promise." I say and she pulls me up into a bone crushing hug

I breathe in deeply and hug her back, tears springing to my eyes as I get lost in everything that's Miley.

Oh shit.

Yeah that's how I admitted to myself that I loved her. It wasn't all rainbows and puppy dogs from then on though. I was nowhere near ready to admit it to other people.

Oh yeah, The Muppets, Cereal and some Jake punching.

Read and review guys.