Chapter 2 - Seaworld Vacation
The family was sitting down and watching the whales jump through hoops.
"Wow, that's really something." said Peter
"Peter, those whales are jumping because if they don't, they don't get to eat." said Brian
"Brian, stop being such a buzz killer." said Lois
Down at the tank, the trainer was on the microphone.
"Everyone, this is Tilikum! He's never hurt or killed anyone! He's more
gentle than Gentle Ben!"
(cutaway)
"Mark, could you come over here?" asked Mr. Wedloe
"Yes, dad?" asked Mark
"There's an unrecognizable dead half-eaten body in the backyard, does Ben have a leg or something?" asked Mr. Wedloe
"No way, Dad! Ben wouldn't do a thing like that!" said Mark
"Oh really!" Mr. Wedloe pointed at Ben, chewing on a leg.
"Who did he eat?" asked Mark
"i'm not sure, let me see if there's any ID." Mr. Wedloe looked in the dead body's wallet.
"Oh, it's just Snooki from Jersey Shore. I guess that's not a big deal. Although we'd better check Ben for Herpes."
(end cutaway)
"Does anyone want to come down here and feed Tilikum a fish?" asked the trainer
"Oh me! Pick me, Pick me!" said Lois
"Lois, stop, you're embarrasing me." said Peter
"That lady up in row 4, come on down!" said the trainer
Lois walked over to the trainer.
"What's your name?" asked the trainer
"I'm Lois." replied Lois
"Have you ever met a whale before?" asked the trainer
"Oh, once, but i'd rather not get into it." said Lois
"Well, here's a fish. Careful, it's slippery." said the trainer
"That's what she said!" blurted out Lois
The whole audience laughed
"Ok, Here I go!" Lois said
Lois turned to the whale and threw the fish into his mouth. He gobbled it down. The audience clapped.
"Good job, Lois!" said the trainer
"Thank you." Lois turned her back on the whale.
Then she heard a deep voice "That's one fine ass."
She gasped, and turned to the whale. It had come from that direction.
"Are you ok?" asked the trainer
"Oh, oh, fine, fine." said Lois
"Well, thank you all for coming! Check out our dolphin display over there!" the trainer pointed over at the dolphins.
As the group walked towards the dolphins, Lois stuck around and looked at the whale.
"Did...did you just talk to me?" asked Lois
"I sure did sweet cheeks. I understand every word you're sayin." said Tilikum
"Oh my god! A talking whale!" said Lois
"You should stick around, I like trainers like you, better than that one a few years ago."
(Cutaway)
Instead of seeing a trainer, we see Peter Griffin.
"Ok, Ok, everyone who's watching this episode of Family Guy, listen up. We wanted to show the clip we had, but you see, it's about this lady, and she's uh, oh how do I put this, uh, oh geez...uh, she's dead, and her family didn't want her death footage broadcasted, so unfortunately, you're gonna have to use your imagination...well, that's it. I'm glad we took the high road on this one...Wait, wait a sec, what?" Peter looks over to the side.
"Ok, we aren't going to show the clip, but I get to do a recreation with this Barbie doll and this dinosaurs hand puppet from McDonalds. yeah, I got it on ebay, 2 bucks."
Peter put the hand puppet on his hand, and grabbed the Barbie doll.
"Whale! Do what I tell you!" Peter mimicked the Barbie with a high voice "No, you evil blonde lady, I am a 6-ton monster, I will eat you! Dun-dun-duhhhh! Dun-dun-duuuuuh!" Peter then clamped the puppet on the Barbie. "Rawr! I will eat you." then Peter quickly spoke again in his normal voice "Hey how come she has no nipples?"
(end cutaway)
"Oh well, i'll try. Let me talk to my husband!" Lois runs off to Peter and the kids.
"Peter, i've made a decision! I want to stay here for a while!" said Lois
"Lois, we've been over this, we can't afford to have Boyz 2 Men perform at your birthday. Geez, you think money grows on trees." said Peter
"No, Peter! I wanna stay and be a whale trainer!" said Lois
"No, No, Lois! You can't do that! You will be doing cruel things to animals!" said Brian
"What he said." said Peter
Lois quickly said "They have boats here."
"Sold! We're getting an apartment in Orlando!" said Peter
Then Peter turned to the audience.
"And by the way, do you know how the name Orlando came to be? The Calrissian family discovered it."
(cutaway)
Mr. and Mrs. Calrissian are sitting on a beach, Mrs. Calrissian is pregnant.
"So what are we gonna call the town?" asked Mr. Calrissian
"Well, what are we gonna name the baby?" asked Mrs. Calrissian
"Well, we could name him Ryan. Or Lando." said Mr. Calrissian
"Lando! I love it!" said Mrs. Calrissian
"Orlando! Let's name it that!" said Mr. Calrissian
(end cutaway)
"And now you know! Hehe, stick around we got more Family Guy coming up!" said Peter