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Star Wars - Fruits of Betrayal Episode One: Alone with the Dark
By
Celgress
"Tonight I'm so alone this sorrow takes ahold."
"I'm falling in the black slipping through the cracks. Falling to the depths can I ever go back? Dreaming of the way it used to be."
Falling Through the Black (2009) Skillet
20 BBY
Public transport enroute to Corellia one day out of Coruscant
Ahsoka Tano sat in the cramped passenger compartment staring out of a view port. Her meager savings all but exhausted she had no idea what she'd do once the transport reached Corellia in a couple of days. Fortunately meals were included with the ticket price, not high quality meals by any stretch but at least she wouldn't starve. It dawned on Ahsoka she was worse off than a salve. At least a salve's basic needs were handled off by his or her master. If a salve were lucky they could get a thoughtful or even nice master who at least treated the salve relatively well. Ahsoka had no such luxury. Perhaps she should sell herself on the open markets of Nal Hutta. A trained force sensitive salve would fetch a pretty price. Ahsoka shook her head. She couldn't do such a thing. What had she been thinking? She was nobody's salve.
"I should have stayed at the Temple," part of her reasoned. "At least until I formulated a plan of action."
"No," Another part of her snapped. "I couldn't remain there with people who had no faith in me. Surrounded by traitors who would always doubt my convictions, it would have been a living hell. I'm better off here on my own in spite of the current hardship. I still have my dignity, what's left of it, something I'd have lost if I'd stayed there surrounded by those self-righteous hypocrites."
"Maybe I should have sold my remaining lightsaber, or at least the crystal, before I left Coruscant?" The first part of her thought. "At least I'd have plenty of credits, instead of running short."
"I'd never live with myself." The second part of her argued. "Its' the only reminder of my former life I have left. Besides I constructed it myself. Why should another reap the benefits of my hard work? It'd probably have ended up in the hands of Cad Bane, Aurra Sing or some other scummy bounty hunter."
"Holding onto it won't help if I die from malnourishment," The first part of her countered.
"Damn the Jedi Order for what they've made me become. The pathetic existence they've forced me into. I hate them with every fiber of my being!" The second part of her thought.
"I can't think that." The first part of her thought almost pleading although it felt more akin to whining. "Down that road lays darkness, madness. I won't let it consume me. If I do I'll lose the last broken shards of myself, of who I am. Anakin wouldn't…."
"If Anakin truly cared he'd have found a way to stop me," The second part of her all but taunted. "He's not different than the rest another deceiving, disingenuous Jedi. If it had been Obi-wan or Padme he'd have done more."
"Anakin cares about me." The first part of her though growing weaker, more uncertain on it's contention.
"I can't fool myself any longer. No one from the Jedi Order cares about me. No one loves me. I was only their tool, nothing more. I'm on my own now. In truth I've always been on my own." The second part of her ranted, it's realization hurt more than Ahsoka thought possible.
Tears slid down Ahsoka's face rapidly increasing into small torrents. Soon the Togruta was openly sobbing. Ahsoka knew she was making a spectacle of herself, but she for the first time since becoming a Jedi she couldn't control her emotions. Now her emotional barriers had all but disintegrated the floodgates were opened. All her pent up feelings were free and Ahsoka could do nothing to stop them from bubbling to the surface. Ahsoka placed her hand against the view port. It felt cold empty inside, like she did between bouts of barely controllable rage. Excusing herself Ahsoka rushed to the fresher facilities.
Ahsoka looked into the holo-mirror after wiping off her face. Wait did she detect a flicker of yellow in her eyes, surely not. Inspecting her appearance more closely Ahsoka was relieved to discover her eyes were their usual blue, that was close.
"What am I going to do?" Part of her thought. "I'm running out of credits. I have no final destination in mind. I can depend on no one but myself. If only I had a friend."
"But I do." Another part of her thought. "Lux Bonteri, I could seek him out go to him. Lux and I have always been close he would help me, I'm sure. All I need to do is find him. Who knows, perhaps we can be more than friends now. Do I have romantic feelings for Lux?"
"Where had that come from?" The first part of her wondered. "I'm a Jedi such feelings are forbidden."
"Correction I was a Jedi." The second part of her interrupted. "I can feel anyway I wish now. I can finally explore what people mean to me, without Jedi prohibitions clouding my mind. I'm free."
The implications of this final thought hit Ashoka hard. "She could love, and hate, whomever she pleased. No one could tell her otherwise. She was at last master of her own emotions, for good or ill."
Ahsoka's head spun. She gripped the edge of the fresher so hard it cracked. Knowing she couldn't afford to pay for damages Ahsoka left the room quickly and as inconspicuously as she could manage. Resuming her portside seat Ahsoka sighed heavily.
The Invisible Hand, six standard hours later
General Grievous paced back and forth across the command deck of his flagship. What he was about to attempt would be tricky at best. Intercepting and then attacking a public transport deep within the core systems could prove disastrous if he were detected. Although Grievous cared nothing about politics even he knew how such an unprovoked attack on a civilian vessel would be viewed in an extremely negative light if discovered. His only choice was to carefully avoid detection by the Republican Navy, no easy feat this close to Coruscant, which is why in large part Grievous only took only his flagship on this particularly touchy mission.
"General we have sighted the target on large range sensors." A B1 Battle Droid manning tactical said it it's usual nasally voice.
"Excellent, are there any other ships within sensor range?" Grievous said raptly awaiting the answer. His entire strategy deepened upon their being no witnesses.
"Negative General," The Droid replied.
"Move to intercept, maximum impulse." Grievous ordered sitting down in his command chair. The game was afoot.
Onboard the public transport chaos erupted as the vessel was caught by a tractor beam. Ahsoka awoke from a troubled sleep to witness a boarding part made up primarily of B1 Battle Droids and a smattering of Neimoidian Warriors storm their way into the vessel. The CIS troops merciless gunned down everyone in their path, including the transport security detail made up of older Clones. Why where they here? Separatist forces didn't usually attack non-military targets. Banishing such thoughts from mind Ahsoka focused on her surroundings. Calling her lightsaber through the Force Ahasoka readied to strike.
"Target acquired," One of the B1s announced.
Two Neimoidian Warriors knelt down firing canisters from small mortar tubes. All the Neimoidian Warriors quickly dawned gasmasks. In only took Ahsoka a moment to understand what was occurring. Clouds of noxious gas choked Ahsoka causing her eyes to water.
"Focus," Ahsoka told herself blinking to clear her cloudy vision. It was no use Ahsoka felt blackness closing around her. "No I must stay awake. I must…." Ahsoka collapsed into unconsciousness.
Meanwhile General Grievous was once more pacing around the command deck hands clasped behind his back. Grievous would have led the boarding party himself if they had not been in Republican Space. If enemy vessels happened by in his absence Grievous didn't want to consider what might happen. His droids were woefully stupid and the Neimoidian Officers weren't much better.
"We've secured the target General, returning to Invisible Hand." A B1's voice crackled across the com.
"Copy," Grievous said stopping in midstride. "Once the boarding crew has returned obliterate the transport vessel, no trace of it must remain."
"Roger, roger," A B1 replied.
Grievous stood still contemplating his latest success. Both Lord Sidious and Count Dooku would be most pleased. Surely he'd be richly rewarded for his efforts.
"Plot a course to Serenno." Grievous ordered settling into his command chair once more.
"At once General," A Neimoidian Officer said.
Coruscant
"Anakin, son I can't help but feel in part responsible for your Padawan's fate." Palpatine said with a grandfatherly smile.
"It wasn't your fault sir." Anakin said. "If anyone I blame myself. I should have refused to allow Ahsoka's arrest."
"Don't blame yourself Anakin, we all failed Ashoka." Palpatine said. "If only we'd believed in her as you did this tragedy could have been avoided."
"I like to think so." Anakin said.
"Anakin is there something else troubling you, aside from Ashoka's fate?" Palpatine asked his voiced filled with seemingly genuine concern.
"The Council didn't believe in Ashoka." Anakin said letting out a deep breath. "I fear they've never believed in me either."
"Surely not," Palpatine said apparently taken aback Anakin's suggestion. "You are one of the greatest Jedi alive today, the aptly named hero without fear. Your accomplishments speak volumes. How can the Council doubt you Anakin? Frankly I don't believe it."
"Trust me they do, they've never believed in me." Anakin repeated his voice cold, resentful.
"Never," Palpatine questioned.
"Never, from the first moment I was brought before them the Council has always doubted me." Anakin said running his organic hand through his mop of unruly hair.
"I recall there were objections to your initial training on part of several Council Members." Palpatine said thoughtfully. "Do such reservations remain in their minds after all this time?"
"With some," Anakin said his voice taking on an angry edge.
"What of Obi-wan. I heard he has recently been elevated to Council Member status." Palpatine said. "Didn't he mount an equally vigorous defense of Ahsoka to match your own?"
"Obi-wan did practically nothing to assist in Ahsoka's defense. He kept telling me to trust in the Force, the Council, the legal system." Anakin said. "I alone believed in her innocence."
"I see, how troubling."
"I should have broken Barriss' scrawny neck when I had the chance."
"Anakin you shouldn't say such things."
"I know sir, but I can't help it. I should have done more to help Ahsoka, everyone in the Order should have."
"Anakin I hate seeing you in such pain. Is there anything I can do?" Palpatine said warmly laying his hand on Anakin's shoulder.
"Thank you sir, your support means everything to me." Anakin said smiling. "I wish I could stay long, but duty calls. I have to good, bye."
Palpatine watched Anakin leave his office. Ahsoka's departure had brought Anakin closer than ever to the Dark Side. As a result his fall would be achieved with far less effort than it would have otherwise required. However the Force whispered to Sidious that he must tread carefully. His visions of the future had become muddied. Things were in greater flux than in over a decade everything was moving taking uncertain paths. Loose ends must be tied up. With that in mind Palpatine donned his Sith robe and Sidious persona. Activating his secret hologram emitter he opened a channel.
"Greetings Lord Sidious," A small blue hologram of infamous bounty hunter Cad Bane said bowing low. "I assume you have a job that needs my unique touch?"
"Perceptive as always Cad Bane," Sidious said. "I do appreciate a sharp intellect in my employees. I need rouge Jedi saboteur and assassin Barriss Offee eliminated before she stands trail for her crimes. I will pay whatever amount you see fit. Additionally the sooner Offee is no more the higher a bonus I shall gift you, understand?"
"Consider her ancient history Lord Sidious." Cad Bane said ominously.
"Good, farewell Cad Bane." Sidious said deceiving his hologram unit.
Drumming his fingers along the desk surface Sidious grinned sinisterly. If he were to secure Ahsoka's and maintain Anakin's trust his role in Barriss Offee's schemes must never be uncover. Luckily disposing of Barriss in a timely fashion should prove rather easy. Cad Bane was the best active bounty hunter, he'd succeed in his task. Barriss was merely another tool that had become blunted, her usefulness at an end along with her life.
The Invisible Hand, two hours later
The first sight that greeted Ashoka's eyes once she regained consciousness was General Grievous' golden eyes. Instinctively Ashoka jumped at his presence. Ashoka scurried across the bed getting as far away from the cyborg monstrosity as she could manage.
"Greetings young one, I hope you find our accommodations to your liking?" Grievous said in a rather friendly tone which perplexed Ashoka. Since when was Grievous anything other than a raving lunatic?
"W-Where am I? W-What do you want?" Ashoka squeaked in fear.
"We desire nothing other than your company." Grievous said taking a step forward.
"Stay back, I'm armed." Ashoka warned reaching for her lightsaber. It wasn't there, her hand came back empty.
"I took the liberty of having your lightsaber removed." Grievous said almost jovially. "We were concerned you may do yourself or others undue harm."
"So I'm your prisoner." Ahsoka said.
"Absolutely not," Grievous said. "Rather we view you as a, special guest."
"Who are 'we'?"
"My masters the Sith lords of course."
"The Sith lords." Ahsoka repeated.
"Dooku and his own master Lord Sidious," Grievous said. Ahsoka noted the reverence in Grievous modulated voice as spoke Sidious' name.
"Where are you taking me?"
"To meet Count Dooku on Serenno," Grievous informed her.
"Why," Ahsoka said a terrible feeling of dread crept into her mind.
"Count Dooku will complete your training in use of the Force." Grievous said matter-of-factly.
"I don't care if the Jedi Order has turned their back on me. I will never join the Dark Side. I will never become one of you." Ahsoka said defiantly while vigorously shaking her head.
"Never say never young one." Grievous said. "I was once like you; young, idealistic, until I to was betrayed by the Jedi."
"I highly doubt that. We have nothing in common. We never have and never will."
"I admire your convictions young one." Grievous said with his version of a laugh. "However as you grew older you shall learn few things in life are certain. Most truths we cling to depend greatly upon one's point of view."
"I'm a child of light, not darkness." Ahsoka said. "Torture me I'll die before changing my allegiance."
"The Jedi would be proud." Grievous said with mock clapping. "How sad they chose not to reciprocate your devotion, truly a pity. Blind loyalty is wasted loyalty."
"What do you know of loyalty?"
"More than you obviously do young one," Grievous said. "I only give my loyalty to those who appreciated and reward it. Not to those like the Jedi who lack honor."
"The Jedi have honor." Ahsoka said her voice wavering.
"What's the matter young one? I detect doubt in your voice."
"They have honor, I know they do."
"Do they? Why than did they reward your loyalty with treachery?"
"You and your masters betrayed Ventress." Ahsoka pointed out.
"Wrong young one, Ventress betrayed my masters first." Grievous stated relating the story he'd be told. "She sided with the Night Sisters over us and trained her own apprentice to assassinate Count Dooku."
"It doesn't matter, I won't join you. I can't join you. I'd be betraying everything I have ever held dear." Ashoka said hugging her knees. "I'm not a traitor."
"No, you are a fool young one." Grievous said glaring at Ahsoka. "The Jedi have already betrayed you, holding onto misguided faith in them is futile." Grievous whirled around stalking away he gave the pair of Magna Guards stationed by the door to Ahsoka's quarter orders. "She is free to roam the ship, but not leave it. If she tries to either leave or attack prevent her by using whatever means are necessary. Escort her wherever she may go. Save classified areas the entire vessel is at her disposal. See she is fed at an appropriate time." Each Magna Guard nodded their understanding. "Farewell young one. We shall see each other soon." Grievous said over his shoulder.
Ahsoka continued sitting on the bed long after Grievous had left. Slowly rocking she hugged her knees. She knew she should try to escape, but how? If she did escape then what, it wasn't as if she had anywhere to go.
"He's right, Grievous is right the Jedi aren't worthy of my loyalty or continued admiration." Part of her thought. "Turns out they never were. I was only fooling myself. Willfully ignoring their many flaws, I was blind now I see."
"Grievous is a monster." Another part of her thought. "Think of how many of your friends he's murdered in cold blood. Remember he was ready to kill younglings."
"They were Jedi, they weren't my friends none of them not really." The first part of her mentally shouted. "The younglings no doubt would have been better off if he'd killed them. At least they'd never face the possibility of betrayal, as I did."
Ahsoka's eyes widen at this last thought, so morally repugnant was it. She could hardly believe she'd entertained such a notion, no matter how briefly. The slaughter of innocents, especially children was categorically wrong. Such actions could never be justified. What was happening? Why was she thinking this way? Was she ill, or was this her true self freed from the restraints of Jedi doctrine. A shiver ran through Ahsoka's body. If this was the real her perhaps the Jedi had been justified in their actions. She wasn't worthy of being one of them. She was flawed, touched by darkness. She felt it seeping inside contaminating her slowly skewing her perceptions of right and wrong, changing her very being. Could she expunge it from her soul, or was it already too late? Was she doomed to become the thing she reviled and had vowed to destroy? Ahsoka feared she'd learn the answers sooner rather than later, whether she wanted to or not.
To Be Continued