Okay, so I'm going to try to update a couple times a week, but each chapter will vary in length depending on how much spare time I have, I suppose. If you can, please review and let me know what you think! Criticize, whatever! It will all help in the long run.

Now, read, and hopefully, enjoy!

I own nothing but Edie and the town drunk.

I woke up with the worst hangover and silently cursed my small stature and my inability to say no. While I was at it, I cursed Zack who I knew wouldn't be feeling anything near the hell I was currently experiencing due to his Mako enhancements. Damn SOLDIER.

With great effort I pulled myself slowly out of bed and dragged myself over to the mirror to assess the damage. Well, of course-morsels of food clung to my face as if I had contracted some sort of skin disease. I had changed out of the clothes from last night which I had kicked to a corner of the room in desperation of sleep, but, even from here, the stale scent of yesterday's meals intruded my nostrils. Panda eyes-of course, that's a given. My dark brown, almond shaped eyes were rimmed with dark, smudged circles and all over my face I had imprints of a deep red lipstick. Strange. I don't recall putting any lipstick on last night. Funnily enough, my hair was in near perfect form-with the exception of the ketchup and Chocobo Stew that streaked it here and there. However, it hung down as it always did, almost black and perfectly straight. Not even a night on the town could shift it. I snorted at the sight and made a mental note to ask Zack what exactly had happened at the Goblin Bar.

Ah, Zack. He's due to leave for Wutai today.

I dragged myself over to my bed again and grabbed my PHS, which sat on my small bedside table, and then left my bedroom and shuffled into the living room.

My little apartment consisted of basically two halves: there was the lounge/kitchen which was an average size, yet, was pretty accomodating seeing as I lived alone, and the bedroom which led to a cramped bathroom to the right of it. It wasn't much but it was cheaper to rent out accomodation through Shinra. The apartment complex I live in is shared mostly by secretarial types and those who worked within the executive at Shinra. However, we did get the occasional infantryman, usually those who couldn't handle living in the barracks provided by Shinra.

As I rummaged the kitchen cupboards for any sign of food, I flipped open my PHS and scrolled through my contact list and hit 'send' when I found Zack's name. Affectionately, I had dubbed him 'Spikey Asshole'. It rang once and then-

"HELLO?"

"I hate you," My voice was croaky and I knew it would only serve him a laugh.

And laugh he did.

"Nyawwww. Is somebody-hungover?"

"Ya, har har. When do you leave?" I croaked, causing another eruption of laughter on the other end of the line, "Shuuut-UP."

"I'll come by in a few, I don't leave for another couple of hours anyways. 'Geal's just getting together some last minute preparations," he paused, "You do realise it's only half past 6?"

"OH, FOR FU-"

The line went dead.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Not 15 minutes later, Zack Fair burst into my apartment. I cringed at the sound and then cringed again when I realised I had left the door unlocked all night. As if he read my mind, Zack turned a quizzical look to me, "Uh, do you want to be killed in your sleep?"

"Don't be a drama queen. This is Sector 8, not the Slums," I retorted, pissed off that he had called me out on my own stupidity. It was usually the other way around... "And besides," I continued, "You're the only idiot who would go bursting through a door like that. Most people would assume the door is locked."

"I clearly don't have a healthy respect for doors," Zack mused, "Sometimes I even forget they're there." Why doesn't that surprise me?

"Hey, Zack," I began, and he made a small sound of aknowledgement as he stuck his head in my fridge, looking for something he could polish off before he left, "What happened to my face?" 'Aha!' I thought, as I watched him-minus his head-stiffen. It was the puppy's fault-somehow.

Zack slowly withdrew from my fridge and turned very slowly around. He gave me a sheepish grin as he rubbed the back of his neck nervously, "Ah, well, you see-"

"Zackary Fair..."

"You kinda got picked up-"

"I WHAT?" I screeched, causing Zack to cringe, "WHO, WHAT, WHERE AND-MOST IMPORTANTLY-HOW?"

"Okay, so I really had to pee and then I kinda got stuck in there because there was this guy, right, and he wanted to see who could pee the highest-and cause, like I'm SOLDIER and all, he took it as a personal insult because he thought that my Mako enhancements gave me an unfair advantage. And then of course, I could pee higher than him, in fact, I hit the ceiling, and then this guy pissed all over himself and-" he blurted out all in one breath before I exploded...

"ZACK! GET TO THE POINT, FOR THE LOVE OF MINERVA!"

"Okay, well while I was in there, I guess there was nobody to protect you from that thing," he shuddered. Then I shuddered. Then I vomited a little in my mouth. That thing would be the local Sector 8 cougar-lover of hard liquor, men and especially women. And Zack had left me to it's molesting clutches. Oh, Gaia, did I feel ill.

"Uh, it turns out, she really likes Chocobo Stew-"

"Zack?"

"Yes, Edie?"

"Please excuse me for a minute."

I just made it to the toilet.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

After emptying my guts (which probably wasn't for the first time in the past 24 hours), I showered while Zack ducked out to grab breakfast seeing as my apartment seemed to be completely devoid of food. After scrubbing at myself-particularly my face-for a good 20 minutes, I was finally satisfied and stepped out onto the tiled floor of my bathroom. Wrapping a towel around myself I ambled over to the mirror above the basin and observed my face. I sighed contentedly-ahhhhh, cleanliness.

Damn, Zack. Leaving me to the clutches of the overtly sexual, alcoholic. At least he had been nice enough to hold my hair back as I vomited up my entity. I smiled softly at that. And then I immediately frowned. Erhh, what was that?

That look of adoration I had just caught in my eyes did not sit well with me. Not. At. All.