Anna Bates and John Bates... Lament a lost youth

Ivy had been put to bed apologizing to Anna all the while about keeping her at the big house so late. Anna didn't mind and had told her so, stating that Mr. Bates would have to wait his turn. The maid liked Ivy very much and understood the relevance and necessity of being young and foolish.

Anna had never had the chance to be young and foolish having gone to work when she was barely a teenager. She had to admit to herself, she was just a bit jealous if Ivy. Times were different now. A young lady and a young lad going to pub for a few innocent drinks and wouldn't turn heads now as they would have when Anna was young. Times were changing.

She had learned from a very young age not to trust men. Even young men. They were the worst. Her mother and her sisters had told her all about the horrors that a man's touch would bring. And the only touch from a man she had known had been her step-father. Up until a few years ago she believed it. Until a certain gentleman had changed her thinking. For the better. What a changing world indeed she thought as she walked past the foliage that lead down the lane to the cottage that she shared with her husband.

Mr. Bates would be worried at her tardiness and she quickened her pace to get home as quickly as possible. The only sounds she heard were her dainty, light footsteps on the cobbles. She smiled to herself again at Ivy. What a fool. She would not have a very good day tomorrow. Anna had seen a few thick heads over her years at Downton but had never been irresponsible enough to let herself get carried away like that. But to be young again.

She turned the final corner down the dimly-lit lane and startled as she saw a dark figure approaching her. He was not far away and she felt her heart-rate quicken as she realized she had nowhere to go. She put her head down and tried to walk across the lane to opposite side, but the figure had lessened their distance in her attempted action and reached out to grab her arm.

"Anna?" A familiar voice rung in her ears.

"Oh my God, Mr. Bates, you startled me. What are you doing out sneaking around after dark?" She stood tall to give him a relieved kiss on the cheek.

"I was coming to meet you. I wasn't sure if you would be on your way back yet and I didn't think it right that a young lady should be walking alone after dark, despite how familiar the route was." Her arm in his, they continued the rest of the way to their cottage.

"I'm hardly a young lady John." She heard him chuckle. "But thank you. You are very sweet"

"Well my dear, you are my young lady."

They entered the cottage and John helped her off with her coat and she then helped him with his. When their outer vestments were in the appropriate place they walked into the small sitting room but she stopped as he tried to pull her close to sit on the chair with him.

"My goodness, was Ivy ever silly. That ridiculous Jimmy should have known better than to give her so much to drink. Why would he do that? I thought he was a gentleman. I hope Mrs. Hughes and Mrs. Patmore aren't too tough on her tomorrow." She babbled on while standing in the middle of the room. Her husband just sitting and smiling at her as he so often did.

"My guess is that he is a young, handsome man who wanted to convince her to do things under the influence of too much drink." Bates was sure of this more than he led on.

"Were you like that when you were a young man?" Anna was taking off her hat as she spoke.

"No. But I understand all too well how too much of a fine drink can make you do things that you wouldn't normally do, and I was never as handsome or charming as Jimmy."

"Of course you do. I forgot for a minute. And you are twice as charming and handsome as Jimmy will ever be." She leaned down and kissed him. One of her gentle kisses that made his heart pound and she lingered longer than usual.

"I bet that's more than Jimmy got from Ivy tonight, all that money spent for naught." Anna smiled, keeping her face very near to his. "Would you like some tea Mr. Bates?"

"Yes please. If you're not too tired. It's been a long night."

She kissed him again quickly and left him sitting as she went into the kitchen to get them both something to drink.

As she prepared the tea she spied a bottle of whiskey in the top shelf of their small pantry. Mr. Bates didn't drink himself anymore, but he kept some on the shelf in case a guest happened to stop by and might like a nip. She took the bottle and uncorked it. She thought of Ivy and her giddiness and wondered exactly what a girl would do under the influence that encouraged the men to take advantage of them. She took a slow sip and cringed as the harsh liquor hit the back of her throat. She took another and another. Never having been under the influence, she wondered how much was needed to do things that Mr. Bates might enjoy. She took one more sip, recorked the bottle and put it back on the shelf.

It wasn't long before she felt her face flush, and a softness came over her. A giddiness. She felt like laughing and spinning around. She made the tea, taking longer than normal and eventually John came into the kitchen, wondering what had happened.

He put his hand on the small of her back as she stooped over the counter, and she turned around and grabbed his face with both of hers and pulled him into her for a crushing kiss. Though he was appreciative of her enthusiasm, he wondered about her change in character. As soon as she pulled back a bit and exhaled, he knew what the issue suddenly was smelling the whiskey on her breath.

"What are you doing?" His voice was sterner than she was used to.

"What's the matter Mr. Bates? Don't you want to take advantage of me under the influence?" Her voice was slightly slurred.

He stopped her hands fumbling at the zipper of his trousers by taking them both in his.

"I think I know what you're thinking my dearest Anna, and whatever thoughts are running your brain right now must stop. This is not the way"

She looked up at him with a look on her face he had never seen from her. He wondered if his words were too harsh. She started to cry.

"Oh John, I just thought that if I could behave as Ivy was earlier, I would lose some inhibition,"

"Oh my young love. I'm sorry that you are stuck with a dreary old brooder of a man." Bates tried to catch her eye but she would not look at him.

"It's not that, it's just. I don't know. I wanted to see how it would feel. I have never gone to the pub out with boys before. I never had a chance to be young and foolish." In the candlelight of the kitchen he could see that her eyes were red and swollen from the impending tears. His heart pulled in sympathy.

"And now by being married to me, you've lost all chance to be young. Or so you think. My dear, even though you don't feel like you are young, you will stay young in my eyes for all time. You don't need to act it, because you are. Young and beautiful, and a bit of a fool right now." He pulled her hands up to his smiling mouth and kissed each of them in turn.

"I am so sorry. I've acted foolishly." Her face burned red, but he did not know whether it was from the sting of embarrassment or the flush of the drink.

"Don't fret. Just go to bed and sleep it off. I'll clean up in here" He turned her around and gave her a slight nudge towards the bedroom. She stumbled a bit before she found her footing and disappeared into the other room. Bates just smiled. She deserved to be young. She deserved to go out and play with the other young girls, not be stuck at home with an old fuddy duddy.

She would feel better in the morning. He would not.

Anna opened her eyes and could tell it was before dawn. She knew she should be getting up yet her body denied her the ability for just a few moments. Then the conversation with her husband came back to mind from the dregs of her sleep. She sat up quickly which was a mistake as she felt her head spin and she fell back against the pillow.

"I left a glass of water on your night table. Drink it slowly my young fool." Her husband was not asleep, as he had been keeping a careful, protective eye on her since bedtime.

Anna felt out in the dark and reached the glass. She half sat up and sipped it slowly and felt much better in no time.

"Thank you John. I am so sorry."

He rolled over in bed so that they were facing and wrapped his arm around her to pull her close.

"Don't apologize. You have no reason to ask for forgiveness. But I know of something that we can do that would make all those young folks at the big house something to be jealous about. Young Jimmy will someday realize all you have to do to be with another young lady is to take care of her and make her see the proper way." He kissed her gently and felt her lips smile beneath his.

"Shall we get proper then?"

He didn't reply for he was suddenly very busy making sure that his wife knew what it was to be happy. Very happy. Completely happy. Madly happy. He knew Jimmy and Ivy would not be so happy this day despite their youth and future of independent promises. And he would smile at his knowledge to them this day.

A/N This shall continue, providing the muse is tickled. Be the tickler my friends. Be the tickler.