CHAPTER 2: Bowser Tournament
I woke up the next day fully rejuvenated from my previous day's training. I ran down the stairs, through the back room of the deli, and over to Para Park to meet everyone else. They were already there intently waiting for me.
"Ah! Carl, come on over here!" Axel yelled, ushering me to his usual seating area.
I sat down next to them as Axel gave us our final pieces of advice.
"You've all worked very hard the past two days, so I just wanted to say how proud I am of all of you. If it were up to me I'd let you all in. Sadly, however, that's not how this works. This will be the hardest thing any of you have ever done in your lives. Not just the tournament, but being a soldier. Fighting will become your life, your being. Your fellow soldiers will become your dearest friends who could die at any moment, same goes for you. Now not a lot of people in Bowser City are very active fighters, which means that your main competition will be cops trying to make it big. Being in the Army is like, "The Show" for cops. They all dream of it. Before it got so crowded, they used to let one cop in a month as a test run. If they didn't hold up with the others, they got cut. Oh, look at me rambling. Anyways, we better get there quick, I've gotta coach you fools." He laughed as he jumped up with a pep in his step that was thought to be long gone.
"Um, Axel?" Violet asked.
"Yes?"
"How are yo-is Horace-jumping around like that?"
"I'm not going to share all of my secrets." He winked and laughed at the butterfly before flutter-jumping towards the north of the town.
We began to follow him until a Red Paratroopa in a police uniform stopped me.
"Hey, kid." He said as he tapped my soldier. My friends kept walking and talking as I tailed behind.
"I overheard what that old coot has been telling you for the past couple days. He's nuts. If you want to learn how to REALLY fight, then you can get a personal lesson from a REAL soldier. Y'know, once I win the tournament."
He chuckled and flew off, along with a small crowd of people down Bro Street. I followed them to where there was usually a grassy hill, leading up to a path to Bowser's Castle. Of which, naturally, is heavily blocked off and guarded. Today, however, there was a rather large stage at the top of the hill, with a small little roped off arena at the bottom. On the stage was all of the Top Generals of the Army, as promised on the flyers. The crazy cool Lakitu: Lakilester, the Magikoopa duo of Kamek and Kamella, the fair and just ruler who puts his servants before even himself, King Bomb-Omb, and finally: Prince Bowser Jr. They were sitting in their own chairs on the stage with Bowser in a sort of makeshift throne. The now decent sized crowd surrounded the arena as our King surveyed the area. Eventually he stood up and grabbed the microphone that was in front of him.
"Welcome, citizens of Bowser City!" He roared.
The crowd cheered in excitement before he could continue.
"Hey guys, sorry." I half-yelled up to my friends, running to catch up to them.
"Ssh, don't miss it!" Ted whispered, not taking his eyes off the stage.
"Today, 8 fighters will compete against each other for the chance to get into my Army!"
Once again the crowd applauded, a few screaming random threats and compliments.
"So, here to introduce these fighters: General Lakilester!" Lakilester got up and floated up to the stand as Bowser sat back down in his chair.
"What's up Bowser City?"
"We love you Lakilester!" Lakilulu screamed from the side of the stage.
"Haha, thanks, Lulu. Anywho I'm here to announce the fighters, lets get to it already. First we have... Samuel the Goomba!" People clapped as a Goomba with a red and white polka dot bowtie raced up on stage. He smiled as Lakilester continued.
"Next, as a recomendation from Lord Bowser himself, man that's cool, give it up for our next three contestants: Carl the Hammer Brother, Violet the Flutter, and Ted the Spiny!" The three of us gasped as we, too, ran up on stage next to Samuel the Goomba. When I got up there Bowser looked over to me and smiled.
"I can't believe this is really happening!"
I looked around before noticing that Samuel had whispered to me.
"Yeah, it's pretty great."
"No hard feeings if we go against each other, ok?" He said, tapping my foot with his shoe in a fistbump like manner.
"Yeah, no hard feelings." I gulped.
During our conversation Lakilester had announced a Bomb-Omb named Shelby and a Gushen named Wallace.
"Next on the docket is, from what I hear, the best cop in Bowser City: Vincent the Paratroopa!"
As he made his way up to join us I groaned, realizing that it was the same Paratroopa from earlier.
"And finally I am mega super proud to announce our final contestant! Friend, comrade, cool dude, and excellent fighter, re-introducing... Axel the Yoshi!"
Violet, Ted, and I gasped yet again as Axel flutter-jumped on stage next to us.
"Axel?!" The three of us asked in unison.
"Hey there kiddos."
"What about being our coach?"
"Nah nah, I'm here to see how much you've grown."
"Grown?" Ted pondered.
"I've known you since you were all little kids, and now you're my best friends. I want to see how far you've come."
"That's a lie, isn't it?" Violet said.
"*sigh* You kids know me too well. I'm not here just because of that... My life doesn't have purpose anymore. I went from the best cop in town to a shell of a man, picking up peoples garbage. I want you all to make it, but I just want my last few remaining years knowing I either have a reason to live, or know that l've tried."
"Wow... and Horace?" I asked in amazement.
He showed me his leg which had something strapped around it.
"A knee brace and a whole lotta pain killers." He chuckled to himself as Lakilester continued onward.
"For round one, we have Samuel the Goomba Vs. Carl the Hammer Brother!''
"Good luck, kid." Axel said, smiling at me as I jumped into the arena.
I pulled out my hammers at the tiny Goomba opposing me.
"FIGHT!" Laikilester yelled as the crowd watched intently.
We stared each other down for a moment before finally he made the first move, jumping towards my stomach with his leg extended. I went to swing my hammer but I couldn't, something was holding me back. I didn't want to hurt him.
*Maybe this was a mistake* I thought as he hit my stomach, hard.
"Ooh and Sammy G with the blow to the belly!" Lakilester emphasized in shock.
The force of the kick flew me into the fence behind me as I scrambled to get back up. I focused myself and charged at him, my weapon in hand.
"And remember, nothing fatal! Man, that would suck if someone died here." Lakilester announced.
I went to smack him with the flat side of my hammer when he slid downwards towards my feet, tripping me. I fell face first into the dirt, a dust cloud forming a sort of wake behind Samuel.
"Ooh and another devastating blow to our Hammer Brother friend! Do we have the little Goomba that could?" Lakilester yelled with a look of worry on his face.
"uh bowser... are you sure this is the little dude you recommended?"
"positive."
A conversation my friends later told me about, to my chagrin.
I got up off the ground, my back facing Sam. My friends were looking at me with a soft, kind smile. I quickly spun around, launching my hammer as hard as I could. It hit the poor brown stump right in the head. The hit sent his little light-weight body flying, as the tool bounced off him like a trampoline. I grabbed my second hammer and ran over to my victim. He too had hit the fence pretty hard, however Samuel wasn't done with me yet. He hopped up to his feet and scowled at me, his bow tie cut from the sharp side of my hammer, an accompanying circle appearing on his forehead.
"Oh man that was cool! But uh-oh, Sammy is looking pissed now, he's hungry for blood!"
He jumped at me again however this time I took Axel's advice about agility and swerved to the right, sending him to the ground behind me. I went to smack him with my hammer but in defense he kicked it out of my hand, sending it into the air. I jumped up, grabbed it, and threw it back down at him. It hit the poor mushroom-man right in the head, just above where I hit him before.
"The tides seem to have turned, and now Goomba Dude is falling behind. One more big hit and he's sure to fall!"
I landed in front of the enraged Goomba who lept towards me one final time. I took my hammer and swung at him like a baseball bat, sending him full force into the ground.
"And there it is! Sammy G is down for the count, and Carl is moving on to Round 2!"
"No hard feelings, right?" I only half bragged, reaching to help Samuel up.
"fuck off." He muttered under his breath, ignoring my gesture as he shuffled away.
The next match was Shelby the Bomb-Omb Vs. Axel, in which Axel won. It was refreshing to see him fight with so much passion. Next was Vincent vs. Wallace the Gushen. You can probably guess which show off won... Finally it was Ted against Violet. It was really close, since Violet didn't have many attacks that could hit Ted's weak-spot without backfiring. She won just barely by picking him up and throwing him into the ground. It was pretty spectacular.
"It's Semi-Finals everyone!"
He took pause for a moment to point at a sign I hadn't noticed before, depicting our rankings.
"First match is Axel our favorite Yoshi paired with Carlos the Hammy Bro! Let's have a fun match my guys!"
"Must you always talk like that?" King Bomb-Omb asked in disgust.
I ignored him, despite the fact that he was just close enough for only me to hear. Axel hopped over the fence to face me, a smile on his face, although worry in his eyes.
"Remember what I taught ya kid. And don't worry about me. I'll be just fine no matter what happens. And trust me, I won't be holding back either."
He laughed his Santa-esque laugh, forcing me to smile along with. He signaled for me to go first so I pulled out a hammer. He suddenly went inside of an egg and rocketed towards me. I quickly dove out of the way, however he simply turned and stampeded back to me. I tried to jump but he merely jumped too, smashing the egg into me at full force. I flew upwards, a thin net confiding me to the circle of the arena. I stuck a hammer in the one of the holes in the top of the net and swung foward, dropping behind Axel. I jumped at him, swinging my second hammer when he turned around and stuck his toungue out. I don't want to describe what it's like to pass through an old man Yoshi's digestive system like creamed corn, but it's gross. Though I was only in there for what felt like a few seconds, I could still sort of hear Lakilester's commentating before my confided space became a large circle. I realized I had come out in an egg and quickly smashed open the back side of it. I crawled out just as Axel smashed the egg behind me. I spun around to see confusion on his face before he noticed me. I threw a hammer at him that hit his arm pretty hard. He winced, which made me feel bad, before suddenly smiling at me. I smiled too before running towards him. He jumped so I jumped too, hitting his stomach with the flat side of my hammer.
"Ooh Carl with two great back to back hits! How will Axel recover?"
That question was answered quickly as Axel made his next move. By this point I had knocked him forward so now I was underneath him. In an instant the Yoshi dove violently towards the ground. I attemtped to dodge however due to Axel's speed he hit my foot pretty hard. It was like stubbing your toe... but your whole foot. I cried out a very small amount, trying not to seem weak, and grabbed a hammer. Axel was sort of looming over me as I lay there, helpless. He stuck his tongue out however I grabbed it this time just as he started to suck me in. I grabbed a hammer and smashed his tongue before jumping away, back onto the ground. He too cried out in pain however it was garbled due to the injury. My foot was still in immense pain; meaning I couldn't get up. Axel, the both of us obviously growing more and more determined and excited by the minute, rolled into an egg and took a minute to aim at me. Just as he started rolling I too rolled on my side, causing him to smash into the fence just behind me. He came out dazed and confused, so I slowly rose to my feet just as he turned around. I grabbed a hammer and threw it at him, however to my surprise he stuck his tongue out and ate my tool. A few seconds after Axel had eaten my hammer it, just like me before, had come out in an egg. I attempted to run towards him however my foot hurt too much so I could only sort of limp.
"If you're not going to commentate then just let me do it!" King Bomb-Omb stated in his firm, kingly voice. I had been too involved in the battle to notice.
"*Ahem* Carl has quite obviously received quite a large amount of damage to his right foot, making movement difficult to impossible. This of course gives him a rather large disadvantage against his faster opponent."
*thanks for reminding me...* I thought.
Axel took the egg and chucked it directly at my face, sending me flying straight back to the ground. After removing egg bits from my helmet I got up again.
"Now seeing as we know of Axel and Carl's existing friendship, we can make the assumtion that Axel is showing mercy to Carl, otherwise surely he would have lost already."
"Alright king bro, you're bad at this, I'm taking over again." Lakilester said in disgust, ushering the King back to his chair.
*thank god...*
"It's all good my hammer headed colleague, you can still win this!"
His words inspired me to get back up as Axel rolled into his egg. I only had one hamme left as my other one was... who knows where. He shot towards me however instead of dodging I took my hammer and smashed the egg with all of my might. I cracked the egg and quite clearly hit Axel as the recoil shock was powerful. He flew out of the other side of the egg and hit the ground, not quite hitting the edge of the arena. He was still... smiling. Why? Why was he smiling when I had defeated him? I fell to the ground, half because my foot hurt, but half because I was hoping it'd be called a tie and we could both be let into the army.
"It appears as if MC Hammer is our winner twice and counting!" Lakilester announced as the crowd roared.
No dice. 2 Monty Moles dug their way over to Axel and I with First-Aid kits and started healing our injuries.
"Your foot'll be fine, kid. Just hurt it, nothing too bad; don't worry." He reassured me. After each Monty Mole left I got up and hobbled over to Axel. I stuck my hand out and he took it, getting up to his feet. I hugged him. I'm only slightly embarassed by it.
"Oh ho, thanks Carl. I told you I'll be fine. You can't get me down."
"Alright, alright break the emotional shit up I'm ready to win this thing already."
I recognized the pompous asshole voice as the cop from earlier... Vincent.
"What's your problem?" Axel asked.
"Whoa, Axel, it's fine. Just let him be."
"No, I won't. I heard what you said earlier about me. I was a cop long before you, and a soldier too."
"Obviously not a very good one, gramps." Vincent weakly retaliated, a smug grin on his stupid, smug face.
God, he makes me angry... and he obviously makes Axel angry too as I lead him away from Vincent. I sat Axel down in the front row of seats, still fuming from our previous altercation. Violet flutters over to the center of the arena opposite Vincent. Vincent started by retracting into his shell, something he did quite often in his first round fight. He bounced back and forth of the fences, Violet floating way above him. Suddenly, he jumped upwards and hit Violet right in the face. She fell towards the ground, however she quickly rebalanced herself and dove towards her shelled opponent. She grabbed on his wings and spun him around, throwing him against the net. Vincent centered himself in mid-air and retreated to his shell yet again, however this time his wings stuck out and flew him straight for Violet. He hadn't gained nearly as much momentum as before, so she easily caught onto him and threw him down to the ground.
His impact looked like it hurt a little as he popped out of his shell and flew up to Violet's height. She easily dodged a punch and kicked him in the side, just for him to grab her foot. Just as she had before, Vincent spun Violet around and threw her against a fence. Though it was a similar move to what she had done before, Vincent's superior strength caused the blow to be much more devastating. She got back up, slightly dazed, and launched towards her opponent yet again. This time the Paratroopa flew forwards too, using both of their momentums to punch Violet violently. She recoiled a bit however continued her punch, just to miss. Vincent simply turned around and grabbed her, punching her a handful of time before throwing her downwards. As a finisher he went into his shell and dove straight for her, colliding at the same time she hit the ground. A small dust cloud formed and, after settling, showed Violet's limp body and Vincent standing quite triumphantly. He had won... of course. Ted, Axel, the same Monty Mole I had, and I rushed out to make sure she was ok. She didn't receive many injuries thankfully.
"You fought really well, kid." Axel praised over the jeers of a few officers in the crowd.
It seemed as if there weren't too many people rooting for him.
"Congrats Officer Vinny! It's finally time for the Round 3! Carl the Hammer Bro vs. Vincent the ruthless Paratroopa! Let's get it going!"
"I'm nervous." I idiotically state to no one in particular.
"You'll be fine, trust me." Ted encouraged.
"I know but not even Violet could beat him..."
"Yeah you know what you're gonna lose."
Thanks Violet.
I slowly walk back out to the familiar arena. The crowd has gotten much larger. At least that's what it seems like. I start by grabbing my hammer and throwing it up at him. He dodges it, causing the tool to get in the net behind Vincent, and races towards me.
"This isn't going to just be about attacking, its about countering. If you throw your hammer, your opponent could dodge it easily. If you hit them while their attacking, then they can't dodge so easily." I remember Axel saying.
I let him fly towards me and attempt to smack him with my second hammer. He does dodge, however, by ducking. After he ducks he punches me right in the stomach, causing me to stumble backwards a bit. He retreats before flying towards me again. I attempt to dive underneath him however he retracts into his shell and dives down into me. After that attack he grabs me by the arms and swings me over his head, causing me to slam into the ground behind him.
"Oof! It seems that no matter what Carl tries, Vincent has a counter! How will our underdog little friend make his way out of this predicament?"
Lakilester seems to have a way to insult and encourage at the same time that I've never seen before. Regardless I get up and start to back away as he flies towards me again. Apparently he only really has 3 attacks: grabbing, punching, and spinning around in his shell. This time I duck and grab his leg. I pull him down to the ground however he goes into his shell and smashes my face against his shell. Finally he grabs me and throws me against the fence on the other side of the arena. I was officially down.
"Ohh! And that's it! Vincent is officially the winner of the tournament!"
A decent amount of people cheered, some booed, and a good percent walked away entirely.
Just as they had before, the nurse raced over along with my friends. The nurse patched up a few cuts and bruises I had and then sank back into the earth where she came from.
"Carl... I- it's ok." Violet said, patting me on the back.
"You did amazingly well!" Ted boasted, laying down next to me.
""It's ok. You lost, we lost." Axel said, standing in front of me.
"I'm still real proud of you kid." He continued.
"But what about what you said earlier? About how this was your chance to feel complete? I'd much rather you get into the Army then that jerkoff." I sighed, still laying there."
"Just give me a minute... we'll go back home and I'll make us all sandwiches..."
They all looked at me disappointingly before slowly walking out of the little makeshift arena. The crowd had left now, the generals had all returned to the castle, and Bowser was no doubt showing Vincent around the castle. I'll go back to working at a deli forever, Ted will get some job somewhere, Violet will stay as a mailwoman, and Axel will die working in his par-
"WAIT!"
It was a roar. From somewhere. Suddenly a giant cartoon-ish hole appeared in the back of the stage and Bowser was standing there. BOWSER.
"Look, kid. That cop guy? He's a real tool. I don't need a tool, I need someone who knows how to use tools." He walked over to me and held his big claw out. I hesitated slightly.
"C'mon kid, I'm willing to give you a chance here."
I finally took his hand and his sheer power nearly accidently threw me into the air.
"You and Vincent will join the lowest rank in my Army, the first militia. You'll be serving under Pom Pom and Boom Boom. If you do well in training, you'll stay, if you don't, you get sent home."
"Are you s-s-serious?" I ask.
"Of course I am. We need someone like you. Now c'mon, I'm showing you around the castle."
"W-w-what about V-vincent?"
"Eh. I left him to Kamek. He'll be dead in a week anyways."
"Heh."