Heads-up: AU-ish, pairings, and OCs.
A/N: I should really be doing my assignments. But I am a stupid, lazy fool so I won't.

i. bibamus, moriendum est

She wasn't a religious girl. In fact, she was an atheist. But damn, was this freaky. She thinks maybe it's an out-of-body experience and that she's alive, but just severely damaged. But looking at her dead body, she knows it's not the cause at all.

Don't look. Look away. Stop. Stop it, Riko.

But she does, anyway. She keeps looking. It's a horrifying sight, even more so with her Scan ability. Blood was oozing out of the side of her head, and her body was twisted in an unnatural shape. From looking at it, she could see that her ribs were all broken. One of them should have at least punctured her lungs. Surprisingly, both her legs were intact. Her arms, however, were an entirely different story.

She's dead.

She laughs.

She's laughing, then she's sobbing, and then she's laughing and sobbing. It's funny of how accepting she was of this. Being dead and whatnot. It was funny since she wasn't nearly as accepting of the idea of a God existing – she was a firm believer of the sciences explaining things. Yet lo behold she ate up the idea that she was some sort of ghost-like being staring down at her body.

Can ghosts even cry? she thinks, wiping away her tears.

She puts that thought on hold as the ambulance finally arrive. Her body's put on a stretcher. People litter around all wanting to get a piece of the spectacle happening. Police arrive. They interview the woman and man who were screaming earlier.

"Then h-he ran over her and d-drove off!" the woman cries. "Oh, it was horrible! So, so horrible!"

Riko decides to follow the ambulance. She's never ridden in one before. She slides inside the closing door, nearly getting hit by it in the process. She stares at herself. She doesn't look transparent at all. She looks exactly how she did – short hair, school uniform – before she died, minus the blood and severe injuries. She pokes herself. She felt real enough. She wonders briefly if she could do ghostly things like go through walls. She pokes one of the walls of the ambulance. She doesn't go through it.

She frowns. Why kind of lame ghost am I?

She looks up at the talking paramedics. They're talking about finding any ID on her so that they could contact her family. One of them says to wait and have a doctor look at her first.

"She's dead, though," one of them says. "Ain't nothing to look at. Might as well send her to the morgue."

" How old?" another asks.

A woman is leafing through her bag. She pulls out Riko's ID card. "Sixteen."

They wince.

"So young," the woman says. "Barely lived at all."

"I feel bad for the parents," another says. "I mean, shit, you're losing your kid so young. 'Specially over something so stupid like this. God, Japan needs to regulate the goddamn drinking and driving laws. This is the third one this week. And, God, it was in morning! What kind of bullshit is it?"

Riko zones out when they start discussing the drinking and driving laws of Japan. She's leans against the wall and sighs. What was she supposed to do now? Haunt her parents? Her friends?

"Haunt your past lovers?" a voice picks up. She looks up and sees dark blue eyes. "Haunt your pets? Your teachers? Your enemies? Oh, you should totally spy on the people you like! I suggest following them into the bathroom when they shower. What a sight, man! What a sight."

"Gah!" she nearly falls over. "Who the hell are you!?"

"You're so cute!" the boy cries with a dumb smile. He's got long, curly blonde hair tied back with a white rubber band. Actually, everything he's got on is white. "I'm Vergil! I'll be your loving guide for your afterlife." A serious looks crosses his face and he adds, "If you bring up Divine Comedy, I won't hesitant to hit you. Even if you're cute."

"What…I….Guide? What?"

"Yes, you're dead, cutie."

"I know that!"

"Mhm. That's good. Makes it easier for me, then."

She sighing, she rubs her temples. "Start from the beginning, you're giving me a headache. What do you mean you're my guide? And what's this nonsense about Divine Comedy? What is that supposed to be, anyway? And why am I here? Aren't I supposed to be in either hell or heaven? Is this purgatory or something? Why are you wearing all white? Are you an angel or something?"

He blinks, looking lost. "I…I am. Oh. Well, um. I'm not an angel, I'm a Guide. And I, um. One sec." He waves his hands and suddenly he's holding pink flashcards. "Oh! Right! Okay so you have a burning regret and in order to properly move on, you gotta deal with it. Yeah. Aw, wait no, I gotta be cryptic and stuff. Shoot!" He looks back at her. "Can you ignore that?"

"No."

"B…but! Ah, fine." He sighs. "Okay. Here's the deal. You're dead, as established. Your soul is bound here by a burning regret, ah, I already said that. Ack! You asked me too many things! Slow down! I'm new at this!"

"Okay," she says. It was a good thing Seirin was filled with idiots; otherwise, she would have been at a loss on how to deal with him. "Let's start with this: who are you?"

"My name is Vergil," the boy says.

"What's this about Divine Comedy?"

"My mom was a literature professor. It was her favourite epic."

"Never heard of it," she tells him.

"Ah, good, we won't have any problems then. You don't know how many of the other Guides crack jokes about it," he says, puffing his cheeks and crossing his arms over his chest. "It's so annoying!"

C-cute, she thinks. He's like a duck or something.

"Are you thinking about something weird, cutie?" he inquires with a sly smile. "Your face is so easy to read! You think I'm cute, huh?"

"N-no!" she coughs. "Anyway, what do you mean by guide? Why do I need a guide?"

"Ah, well, see in order for me to get an upgrade, I have to see to that you deal with your burning regret so that you'll pass on," he explains.

"So the reason why I'm not in heaven," she gulps, "O-or hell, is because I'm regretting something?"

"It happens a lot to people with sudden deaths. It's usually the last thing they're thinking about that binds them to this world."

"Alright."

"Wait, you actually believe me?"

"Yeah, why not," she says. " I mean my body's right there, for God's sakes. Oh speaking of which, who was right?"

"What?"

"Which religion was right?" she asks.'

"Oh, they were all wrong," he says offhandedly. "Anyway, that isn't important."

"I think it is pretty important!" she cries. "I don't believe in God. Or did. Oh shit, I'm going to hell, then?"

He laughs. "Cutie, you're good. I didn't believe God and look at me! I'm a Guide now! Anyway, I can't really talk about it until you've passed on."

"Can't you tell me just a little?"

He shakes his head. "Nope, sorry."

"Fine."

After what seemed forever, the ambulance pulls into the Yomi General Hospital. The paramedics unload her body and quickly send her to the awaiting doctors. Just as quick, however, they send her body the morgue and contact her parents.

Vergil looks around the halls of the hospital with child-like wonder. "It's my first time in Japan," he admits with a sheepish grin.

She mumbles a quick, "Oh that's nice." She's mostly focused on the doctor on the phone with her father. She knows it's her father since the doctor has to repeatedly tell him to calm down and not shout into the phone.

"Cutie? Hey, are you listening?"

"Oh, sorry," she apologizes, turning to him. "What is it?"

"I'm asking you if you've got an idea on what's binding you here."

She shrugs. "I don't know."

"Please tell me this isn't going to become a journey of self-discovery or something."

"Well, sorry!" she huffs, crossing her arms over her chest. "It's not my fault; I genuinely don't know what could be binding my soul here."

His eyes sparkle. He leans over to her and whispers, "Is it a guy? C'mon, just admit it; it's a guy, right?"

"W-would you stop!" she cries. "It's not a guy! I don't like anyone anyway. Didn't. "

He puts his face in his hands and groans. "Noooooo. This is going to be a journey of self-discovery, isn't it?"

"It's not my—"

Suddenly her father bursts in, out of breath. Her mother follows in shortly after him.

"Where is she?" he asks. "Where is my little girl? Where is she?"

"Dad—!"

There's a swirl of light and she no longer finds herself in the morgue. Instead, she's in the living room of a small apartment. The walls are painted in a brilliant white, the top of it adorned with gold designs. There's a small television behind her, and a white couch a few feet ahead. Some magazines are littered on the floor. There was also a disturbing lack of windows in the room.

"What…" She turns to Vergil. "What…what did you just do?"

"No way," Vergil says, crossing his arms to make an 'X'. "Not happening. I am not going to watch that. I hate angst and tears and ugh. It's so gross and annoying."

She grabs him by the collar. "You bastard! Go back!"

"And what?" He stares down at her with a disgusted look. "What will you do? You can't talk to him or even touch him. Are you a masochist or something?"

"I…" she releases him. He had a valid point. He had a very valid point and it pissed her off that he did. "I…I wanted…"

"Anyway, here," he shoves a wine bottle into her hands. With a hint of bitterness he adds, "You won't get drunk off of it. I've tried."

"I don't drink," she tells him, shoving it back to him.

"You should start."

Despite herself, she finds herself asking, "Why?"

"Because you're dead, cutie." He raises the glass to his lips. "You're dead and you're going to be dead for a long time, so why the hell not?"

chapter end

Yo. Happy New Years Eve to you all.

If I did an info-dumped, feel free to smack me. If I handled Riko poorly, feel free to smack me again. OTL.