Disclaimer: The Winchesters belong to Eric Kripke and I will be forever grateful to him for sharing them with us. I hope he doesn't mind me borrowing them from time to time; I promise to return them as I found them.
A/N: Thanks to Kelli for beta reading and for giving me encouragement in all areas of my life. I don't know where I'd be without her!
Role Reversal
Chapter 2
Dean came out of the bathroom and crawled into bed without a word.
"Dean?"
Sam was greeted with silence. He sat on the edge of his bed and leaned forward, hands clasped.
"Dean, come on man. What's going on?"
"I'm tired."
Dean was released from the hospital only a month ago and still had some physical issues but rarely admitted he wasn't at 100. It was lucky for Dean that Sam knew him so well or he would probably end up pushing himself way too far. He was always willing to stop if Sam said he was tired or hurting.
"What else?"
Dean said nothing. Sam waited for a moment, trying to decide if this was the time to push his brother but before he could decide Dean turned onto his back, staring at the ceiling.
"I don't think I can do this anymore." he said quietly.
"What?" Sam was taken aback.
"Dad's gone, we don't know where the demon is – our family is ripped to Hell and I just don't think I can fight anymore."
"Dean." Sam searched for the right words. It wasn't that long ago he when asked Dean how he kept going; Dean had the inspirational words to convince Sam that their fight was a noble one but
Sam didn't know if he could convince Dean of the same thing. "Look, I don't know why Dad left. He probably thinks he's protecting us from something. But – you and I are still together and we can still help people while we look for the demon."
"Why, Sam? No matter how much we fight, we can't win. There are more of them than there are of us."
"What about all the people we've helped? All the other families? And I told you before that I have to find the thing that killed Jessica. I want the real answers."
"I'm sorry, Sam." Dean whispered.
Sam wanted to be angry. He'd given up so much for the fight and now Dean wanted to stop. But he couldn't be angry because as much as Sam had given up, that much had been taken from Dean. Nothing meant more to Dean than his family and the father he idolized let him down in so many ways and even Dean had a breaking point. Sam hung his head.
He stood behind a car in the motel parking lot. The curtain in the boys' room was closed but he could see a light was still on which meant they weren't asleep yet. He wanted to kick open the door and go in but he knew he couldn't do that. Instead he waited until the room went dark and then left the parking lot on foot.
TBC