Hey guys! THANK YOU THANK YOU times a million for the people who reviewed. They all made me smile and made me feel fuzzy inside.
I'd also like to mention that I Beta Read now. And that I'm very anal-retentive about other people's grammar, spelling, and word use. So if you want a persnickety Beta, I'm the one for you.
So…Here's the final part, and in case you haven't caught on, there isn't any smut. It makes me uncomfortable. It is rather long. Anyways, hope you like it.
His eyes were just like she had remembered.
Grey still, of course. But that was to be expected. But they had the same burning intensity that they'd always had. Full of passion, of drive. Gale had the eyes of someone who could do whatever he wanted, he only had to put his mind to it. It made her feel warm, safe. It transported her back to another time: One with blackberries and the smells of the forest and laughter.
But it also brought back pain - a fresh, ripping kind, as if a long scarred-over wound had just been forcefully cut open again. She was brought back to the dark days after Prim's death - the total hopelessness, the feeling of utter defeat. She felt torn in two - one side of her was back to her life before The Games, while the other was there after it had all ended.
He seemed to tell - his eyes reflected her pain. But he took a step forward, boots crunching in the snow that coated the little city of District Two.
"Katniss…" he whispered. He seemed unsure what to do.
There was a long silence. Katniss didn't know what to say, what to tell him after all these years. Should she apologize? Or leave him before he could hurt her anymore…
"I-I didn't expect to see you hear," she whispered finally, her voice coming out rough. She swallowed, looking at the ground. Away from those eyes.
Gale gave a hesitant smile. "I…sort of live her, Catnip." His voice was low, lower than it had been the last time she had seen him. He also looked better fed - he had filled out, with a broad chest and lean muscles.
Catnip. The name sent a thrill down her spine. It had been so long since anyone had called her that. She forced herself to detach her body from any emotion. She couldn't cry, or scream, or laugh hysterically all at the same time. It wasn't physically possible.
But something inside her reconnected, as if someone had pulled the plug on her heart fifteen years ago, and had finally reconnected it. There was a whirring of life, of warmth, echoing through her, an indescribable thrill. She wasn't sure how to react to it.
"I didn't expect you to be waiting, though," she said, her voice still a dry whisper. Hesitantly, she took a step toward him.
He gave a small, sad smile. "I'll always be waiting."
Katniss' mind was racing, but she forced herself to remain calm on the outside. She took a long, steadying breath. "I…I have to go to my hotel room. I'll see you at the convention?" It came out like a question.
He nodded. "Of course. I'll save you a seat?" This, too, was left for her choice.
She gave a sharp jerk of a nod. "I'll see you, Gale." She couldn't believe it. He was here. She didn't know what to say, what to think. It had been much too long.
She grabbed her bags quickly, then ran off the landing pad, fishing out the directions to her hotel. It was a couple blocks away, and she sprinted them. She wasn't ready to handle Gale. The conversation - if you could call it that - had just proved it.
The hotel was large and ornately decorated. Her room seemed to be one of the bigger ones - a Presidential Suite, maybe. Only the best for the Mockingjay, she thought wryly.
She set her bags down and landed heavily on the bed, trying to keep her mind off of Gale. But it had been so sudden. So unexpected. She had never thought that she would see Gale again -there was too much pain, too much anger in their past.
But their was also love. Even she had to admit that. If not the romanticized love that she had grown over the years to loathe, definitely a sort of kinship that she had only ever felt with him. Like they were more than just best friends - together, they were something bigger. Something powerful.
She wasn't sure at all what she would say to him at the Convention. It had been so long. What had happened to Gale since the Rebellion? Was he married? Did he have children? The questions settled sourly in the depths of Katniss' mind, making her feel even more hopeless.
She made up her mind quickly, though. She would go to the Convention. She would try her best to make amends with Gale. And then she would go home.
The last part made the back of her eyes sting, but she shook it off. That was the way it had to be. She couldn't have any more hurt in her life.
Sighing heavily, she made her way out of the hotel room and down into the Hotel's Ballroom.
*Though the Convention had just started, nearly all the tables were full of excited, chattering people. It wasn't hard to spot Gale in the sea of people. For some reason, he stood out to her, like a beacon of light on a foggy night. He was sitting at a table full of laughing people, but the seat next to him was empty except for his coat thrown lazily across the back. She approached him, trying to stand tall. No need to show how nervous she was.
"Hey, Catnip," said Gale as she sat down next to him. It seemed almost…warm. Her eyes were like liquid silver.
She couldn't help but smile back, if only a little nervously. "Hey, Gale."
Silently, he slipped something into her palm from under the table. She rolled it cautiously between her fingers, a slow smile creeping onto her face as she realized what it was.
"Blackberries," she whispered wryly, popping it into her mouth.
He stared into her eyes, smiling ruefully. "Only the best for my Catnip." He lobbed a blackberry high into the air, and she watched it spin in the empty space until it fell into her waiting mouth. She bit into it, juices exploding, leaving seeds and a bittersweet taste in her mouth.
She felt jittery at the mention of being "his" Catnip. It felt oddly possessive, and she wasn't sure if her response to it was the one to be expected of a married wife who loved her husband very much.
She tried to steer the conversation in another, less strangely frightening direction. "What have you been doing, since, well….you know." She looked down into her empty porcelain plate. It showed her tired face, framed by a border of carefully painted roses. They reminded her of Prim.
Gale nodded, looking somber. He was silent for a long moment. "Katniss…" he trailed off, looking as if her was grasping for words in thin air. "I - I really am sorry. I never meant for -"
"But you did," Katniss said dully. She continued to stare at her rose-ringed plate. "That was the whole point."
She snuck a peak at his face. It was worn, and he looked older - much older - than before. His tired eyes looked at her, full of pain and guilt.
And in that moment, Katniss realized that he missed her, had the same amount of guilt and remorse for the death of Prim. And at that moment, she also realized that she could forgive him.
Hesitantly, she put her hand - the one that still had slight pink burn marks - and placed it over his own. It was warm and rough, just as she remembered it. It was odd how so much had changed in fifteen years, yet little things like the feeling of his hands stayed the same.
"Gale," she said, hesitating. He looked up at her, and she forced herself to look into his eyes. "I…I know it hasn't been easy. But I wasn't right - I shouldn't have said those things all those years ago. I don't feel that way anymore. I…I just want you to know that I'm not mad anymore," - she took a deep, steadying breath, feeling on the verge of tears - "And I know that you didn't mean to. I'm sorry."
His eyes were reminiscent. She tried to move her hand back, but he grabbed it tightly. "Thank you," he said simply.
She gave a nervous smile.
He smiled back, relieved. "And in response to your first question, I have not done that much. I work with Two's Defense System, live in an apartment a block away, and have a pet cat named Fenn. That's really all that's changed." Though he seemed to be trying to be light and uncaring, he could not completely mask the sadness in his eyes.
"Wife?" said Katniss, a bit shocked. Gale had always wanted to marry, always wanted to have kids. It was a bit ironic how their positions had been swapped. The only thing she needed was about three more kids. She quickly dismissed the thought.
Gale shook his head ruefully. "These District Two girls just aren't the same." Katniss didn't miss the look he gave her.
A man who she recognized as a Thirteen General was at the mike, welcoming all the guests warmly and explaining about the origin of the Mockingjay Convention. Katniss thought it to be a bit unnecessary, seeing as the only people here were people who had participated in the Rebellion, but she still listened politely. After all, the Convention was being televised.
"And now, without further ado," said the General into the microphone, turning his eyes on Katniss. Oh, God, it couldn't be her already. "Katniss Everdeen! The head of the Rebellion, and our very own Mockingjay."
There was a long wave of clapping as she got out of her seat and walked over to the stage, taking her place behind the podium. The speech she had written only hours earlier lay in front of her, boring and sloppily-done.
Her eyes sought out Gale, finding him relaxing against his chair. He gave her an encouraging smile.
Katniss cleared her throat, then looked up at the waiting audience. Screw her speech. She was past caring, too much had happened to her today.
"Um…Hello, everyone," she said into the mike, causing a loud ringing throughout the ballroom. She blushed, adjusting the mike. She started again, forcing herself to be calm. She sought out Gale's face, keeping her eyes trained on his.
"It has been almost fifteen years since the Rebellion, fifteen years since the disestablishment of the Hunger Games. Fifteen years that have hopefully been full of newfound happiness." She stared into Gale's eyes, struggling on. She pretended that she was only talking to him.
"But we can't forget about what happened," she said, her voice unconsciously rising. "We can't forget, or we'll turn into them. The people who caused us all this pain and suffering in the first place." A few people were nodding in agreement, but she kept her eyes trained on Gale. "We have to remember our pain, our struggles. We have to enjoy our freedom, and not take it for granted. I ask all of you to always remember, because if we don't, the battles will be a different kind next time."
Everyone was staring at her, and she didn't have anything else to say. Looking at Gale, she gave a short nod, then stepped back from the podium. "Thank you."
The audience busted into thunderous applause, some even standing up out of their seats. Gale was one of them. She couldn't help but smile as she walked back to her seat.
After a few more speeches, dinner was served. It was delicious and rich, but not at all like the capitol's food. She ate it greedily - it had been a while since she had had a good meal.
"So, what have you been doing, Catnip?" said Gale, serving himself a heaping portion of potatoes.
"I…" she thought for a moment. What had she been doing. "I…well, I married Peeta." For some reason that she couldn't discern, this made her blush.
Gale nodded. Surprisingly, he didn't seem angry at this. What was more surprising, though, was the spark of annoyance in the pit of her stomach when she saw this.
"Still have Buttercup?" he asked wryly.
She smiled, shaking her head. "He died a few years ago. We buried him with lots of milk and primroses, though." She gave a small laugh as she remembered.
He chuckled too, shaking his head. "And your mother?"
Katniss went quiet at this. Gale looked at her, concerned. He knew it had not been easy for her mother, after Prim's death, but could it really still be bad.
"She's…" Katniss swallowed, grey eyes full of remorse. "Fine," she finished lamely, not meeting his eyes. Despite the many times she had felt like crying, she had not actually done it until now. She wiped at her face as a tear slithered out of the corner of her eye.
Gale stood up, pushing his chair back and grabbing his coat. She looked up with watery eyes to see his outstretched hand waiting for her. He gave her a knowing smile.
"Come with me," he said. "We can ditch this thing. No one will notice."
"Where would we go?" she asked, but even as she said it she took his hand and pulled her tired body out of the cushioned chair.
"Anywhere you want," he said quietly, keeping her hand tightly at his side. He led her out of the ballroom and into the quiet streets. A fresh snowfall had just begun, coating the streets in an unblemished white blanket. Katniss hesitantly put a toe in it. The snow made a satisfactory crunch under her boots.
"Pretty, isn't it?" he said, eyes sparkling. Giving her a quick look, he stuck out his tongue, wrinkling his nose as a snowflake dissolved on it.
Katniss couldn't help but laugh, sticking out her own tongue. She licked up the snow as it landed right on the tip. She walked farther onto the sidewalk, squishing more snow. It had been a while since she had been this close to snow - they had not gotten any yet in District Twelve.
She watched as it fell onto the ground before her, on top of all the other little snowflakes. It was mesmerizing, in a weird way.
At least it was until a giant, wet thing hit the back of her head.
She turned around to see a grinning Gale, holding another lumpy white snowball in his hand.
"Sorry, Catnip," he drawled, tossing the other snowball into the air and then catching it snugly in the palm of his hand. "But you were getting a bit boring there."
She shook her head, an uncharacteristic smirk lighting her face. "Boring, my ass," she mumbled, forming her own snowball and lobbing it straight at Gale's head.
It hit his forehead with a thud, sending snow splattering across his face. He brushed it off, furiously blinking it from his eyelashes. Katniss decided not to tell him that it was all in his eyebrows.
"Nice try, Cat," he said, flashing a grin. "But you know you can do better than that." He grabbed her around the waist, despite her shrieks of protest, and stuck a snowball into the back of her jacket.
It went on like this for a long time, until they were both exhausted and dripping wet, covered from head to toe in snow. They flopped down onto the sidewalk next to each other, spreading flat out and staring at the starry sky. It was quiet for a long time.
Gale finally spoke up, twisting his head to the side to look at her. "I've missed you, Catnip," he said quietly, eyes full of warmth.
She shivered, though not entirely from the cold. "Me too, Gale."
He hesitated for a moment, then looked at her with hopeful eyes. "Do you want to come back to my apartment? I can make you a proper meal, and a fire…" he trailed off, looking at her hopefully.
She smiled. She had missed Gale for so long - the thought of seeing him longer, no strings attached, made her happy. "Oh course." She shivered again. "And I really am freezing."
He led her back down the street, and she huddled close to him for warmth. His apartment was only a short way away, but they ran to get out of the cold, running up the stairs of his apartment building and into his flat on the top floor.
The inside was clean, but full of organized clutter. Knickknacks of all sorts decorated his shelves and walls, ranging from photos to hunting supplies to what seemed like paperwork. The inside smelled like smoke and woods. It suited Gale.
"You like it?" he asked her, putting down his keys and throwing off his jacket.
She nodded. "It's very nice." She thought of her own prim house on the end of Victor's Lane, currently empty. It made her feel strangely guilty.
"Let me get a fire going," he said, eyeing her shivering, dripping form. "And some clothes." He disappeared into another room.
Katniss sat down at the hearth, taking off her jacket and sweater, shivering in her t shirt and soggy skirt.
Gale appeared with a pile of neatly folded clothes. "Here," he said, tossing a stack to her. "A shirt an some shorts. Hope you don't mind that they're mine." He disappeared back into his room to put his own clothes on.
She shook her head, but could feel a blush on her cheeks. "Thanks," she called, stripping of her wet shirt and skirt, undressing down to her underpants and pulling on the dry clothes. She brushed her wet hair out of its messy braid with her fingers, redoing it into its usual impeccable self.
Gale appeared in his own shirt and shorts, sitting down next to her and kneeling over the hearth, fiddling with the logs and striking a match. It blazed resiliently, and Katniss couldn't help but think of The Girl on Fire. It somehow saddened her.
The fire began to blaze, flickering in Gale's eyes as he turned back to her. He raked a hand through his hair. He looked almost…nervous.
"I know these last years haven't been easy for you," he said quietly, eyes focused on the fire. "And I just want to let you know that I'm there for you whenever you need help."
"But you're not moving back to Twelve."
He shook his head, making her heart heavy. "No. There are too many memories. I can't face it all. And Katniss," he looked up at her, eyes almost desperate. "I know you don't want to hear this, but I still have feelings for you."
That caught her off guard - her breath hitched in her throat, and she stared at him. "After fifteen years? You still love me?"
He nodded solemnly. "I'll always love you."
And that was when it all went downhill.
To be fair, she kissed him first, leaning so close that the warmth of his breath heated her wet face, her heart thudding so loudly in her ears that she couldn't hear anything else. She knew it was stupid. Childish. But it felt right, and she had felt wrong for so long now. She wanted to be soothed, to feel comforted and whole once more. She wanted to be Catnip again.
Gale responded just the way she wanted him to, kissing her softly, but then with growing hunger. He tasted like melted chocolate and the woods.
It was so different from Peeta's kisses. Not better. Just different…more hungy, more desperate. While Peeta's made her feel warm and safe, Gale's ignited a desperate fire that hungrily licked up her heart, searching for more to consume. And Katniss wanted more - too much. She knew this, and she couldn't bring herself to care.
Slowly, she sunk into his kissing, only thinking of the fire and the warmth and the heat of her body on his. She forced herself to forget everything. To live in the moment. She deepened this kisses till she desperately latched herself around him, not holding back. She began to unbutton his shirt.
He pulled back, looking at her with wide eyes. "Katniss, are you sure…"
She nodded, grey eyes blazing with heat. "As sure as I'll ever be." She pressed her mouth back against his, wrapping her hands into his hair as he brought her down into the growing fire. And for the first time in a very long time, she felt truly happy.
TBC?
Did you like it? I'll pretend you said yes. Anyways, it won't end this abruptly. I have written an epilogue. Hmm…enticing? I'm going to be mean about it - the epilogue won't go up unless I get some more reviews. And I mean MORE reviews. Yes, I'm greedy. I'll post a little epilogue if you click that button down there. Get it? Got it? Good.