Born with a Smile

By 666akatsuki

Disclaimer: Read the Chapter 0 disclaimer, I'm not typing it again and again; refer to there please for it.

A/n: Whoopie! I'm doing a next chapter for once; please r&r to me so I know what you think. Enjoy. WARNING: This chapter is slightly more mature than the last one and Angelic Aibou was involved within the making.

Chapter 1: Meeting my worst nightmare.

I was just sitting under the sakura trees within the garden when Nobunga Oda walked up to me. He stared at me for a few seconds and coughed to clear his throat. "Tsuki, we have a new officer for you to command over, please treat him with care." I glared back at him, I hated having sub-officers, but they always made me have one. The last one was killed after riding drunk over the edge of a cliff, the one before that was killed by Zhu Rong's elephant sitting on him. I sighed and wondered what strange death would take the newbie. I stood up and dusted the grass and mud from my black armour and followed Nobunga to the palace where Cao Cao, Liu Bei, Sun Ce, Kenshin and Yuan Shao were sat around a rather large wooden table. There were many empty seats which suggested many of them wandered off to avoid another meeting involving a random person being assigned to me. I grumbled my hellos to them and was replied back with mutters and grunts of boredom. I sat down next to Nobunga Oda and he gestured one of the maids to fetch the officer, she returned with a tall man in red armour which looked much like my own. His helmet lacked the horns and his body armour wasn't as frightening to look at, he didn't have any spikes or talons, but he had a rather large broadsword resting at his side. "Greetings everyone, I am Kenshi of the Takiri clan, I am honoured to be here." He was excited and full of life, but his annoyance was overcome by his dashing good looks and long hair that stuck out from underneath his helmet. I checked over his face, but only to noticed three nasty looking scars upon it; one ran from the corner of his left eye down to his lip, another sat nicely over his right eye and the final scar ran across his forehead. Many other scars were on his throat, but I couldn't see anymore due to his clothing and armour, but I guessed this officer wasn't going to be like the rest, this one knew what fighting was like judging from his body structure. "Kenshi, this woman here is your new leading officer, her name is..." Nobunga was cut short as 

Kenshi spoke. "Tsuki Yomi, the warrior that is called demon." The room went silent as he spoke and even for many minutes after he had finished, but he still stood there with a stupid smile on his tanned face. Liu Bei was the first to speak and break the eerie silence. "Tsuki, take Kenshi and show him your fighting skills." I nodded and led the new officer outside towards the duelling area.

It was mostly empty except from Keiji Maeda and Lu Bu wrestling each other to prove who the most powerful warrior in the land was. Each seemed like a giant compared to me, but I had fought Keiji before, but the fight never finished since he was captured by Hanzo Hattori. I only sighed and entered the ring furthest from the other two warriors, Kenshi followed in after me; he placed his sword to the side and then proceeded to remove his helmet. His long dark brown hair flowed about as it was freed from the metal cage it had been in. "I will not fight with weapons, but you may do as you like." He said proudly, I rolled my eyes and got my claws ready to slash at him and show him who the alpha was. I darted towards him, but as my claw was about to strike his face, he grabbed the arm and twisted it upwards while striking me with the palm of his other hand in the face. I flew backwards and hit the pole hard, I snarled loudly and bared my teeth, and swiftly got up and shook myself to recover from the blow. I once again darted towards him, but I changed direction at the last second and attacked from the side of him, he only smiled and rapidly tripped me up causing me to fall flat upon my face in the dirt before him. With a ton of swears I picked myself up and glared at him, he still grinned like an idiot in a flower shop. With a loud screech I head butted him right in the crotch causing the poor guy to scream and fall over; I only pointed and laughed at him while Keiji and Lu Bu went pale with shock at the scene. I had almost forgotten about the horns on my helmet, by then it was too late to save the poor guy's 'equipment' that was now bleeding. I still laughed, and then walked away feeling much better about myself. As I left through the duelling area door I passed by Masamune Date who had seen the whole fight, he stepped back and avoided touching me as I pranced by him.

I didn't know what happened during my mindless wandering around the village, but when I got back to the bar where a half passed out Kenshin with his strange side kick, Kanetsunga Naoe, were drinking wine out a bucket I noticed Kenshi and Zhang He were sitting around in the shadowy table at the back of the room. I could already see that there were a lot of bandages around wrapped around Kenshi's injured area and there were probably three or four crates of the finest wine surrounding them. Zhang He seemed slightly pissed while Kenshi was at the shit-faced stage; the mumbled grumbles echoing from the table seemed to linger around the slowly filling room. I spied Nagamasa Azai and Oichi glaring at me so I guessed they had heard about the news, I lent my head back and noticed Oichi cupping her husband's own area for protection from another accident caused by me. I sighed and 

shouted out, "Hey, it's better than dying from an elephant's ass or spiky pit of doom." Suddenly the sensation of a very pissed off male slapping my face forced me to hit the ground and kick my legs towards the attacker in a frenzy of surprise. I opened my eyes and saw that my opponent was none other than Sima Yi and a very angry looking Ranmaru Mori screaming out strange things about males and their 'special tools'. With a grunt I crawled off into the streets outside the bar, there I stood up and walked off into dark streets. I had failed to notice a man following me close behind, the glint of his long, silver musket under the silver moon. I stopped as I stared blankly at a silver coin on the ground, I bent over to pick it up, but I felt something very warm up against my butt. As I turned my head to glance at who it was I was rudely dragged away into the shadows, I never did get that coin. As the man pinned me against the wall I sighed and grumbled his name in utter boredom.

"Hi Saika." Saika stared at me, a pathetic black sock over his face to hide himself.

"How did you know it was me?" He tilted his head to the side.

"Because it's hard to miss the gun and the clothing for that matter, also who else haunts these streets at night outside a bar with a sock over his head? Only you."

"What about that strange guy... um... Zhang He."

"He takes on men, not women ya twat."

"But I saw him and Zhen Ji the other night getting on with it."

"... Really?"

"Yup, it was awesome to watch, but I would find it better if you let me..."

"NO!"

"But what if I..."

"Bugger off! I'm busy."

"No you're not."

"Yes I am, I have to finish off the job with that Kenshi guy, can I borrow your gun?"

"Only if you let me have my fun."

"Fine, I'll ask Masamune instead, now let go of my breasts."

"But... but... cough... You are the most beautiful girl in all of Japan... and China, would you like me to bring out a smile upon your soft face?"

"No, I told you to let go."



"But I let go of them." Saika whined, both of us glanced down and witnessed a pair of new hands resting upon my breasts, if I recall we both went white with shock. I looked to the left and saw a very pleased looking Gan Ning, but the sound of 'BARE MY CHILDREN!' took us all by surprise as a very drunk Nagamasa Azai staggered out the bar following an embarrassed Oichi. They were soon followed by Azai's maids all trying to obey their master by helping him home to complete the mission. The sound Nagamasa's cries swiftly died off into the night leaving a very shocked Ning, Saika and me in a dark alleyway. Soon Ning decided to run from a very angry Saika for disturbing them in the middle of something. I took this chance to escape back to my room; on the way I passed by Nagamasa's house where the cries of 'BARE MY CHILDREN!' continued to ring out. I sighed and continued on my way.

I glided up the wooden stairs and disappeared into my room, it was messy like usual due to the amount of painting I did with blood and burnt wood, also there was some with ink, but they were probably in the closet. I closed the door behind me and sat upon my bed, the covers were already half way off the bed before I even sat down. With a sigh and pulled the armour off and then eventually my clothes leaving myself sitting naked upon my bed. A knock came at the door, I refused to answer and just curled up under the covers, but I had forgotten to lock the damn door with a chair. Mitsunari Ishida entered my room and then was soon startled to find me naked in bed; he tried to hide his excitement and then got down to business. "Can I borrow a mirror; mine broke after Sakon Shima looked into it." With a very loud grunted and I glared at him telling him to leave or die. "No, you took the last one." I shouted, and then I felt something heavy on top of me. "If you're not going to give me it then I guess I can take something else from you since Saika has been unsuccessful in gaining it." He smirked while licking my ear. "There is a reason why he won't get it, same goes for you now if you would be as kind as to FUCK OFF!!" I yelled, slightly muffled from his creeping hand trying to find my mouth. "Why thank you Tsuki, I will fuck you." Swiftly I kicked him right in the crotch causing him to fall off the bed and whine on the floor. I jumped out of bed and continued to kick the poor bastard in certain places. "DIE BEAUTY MAN!!" I yelled not really caring that Zhao Yun was standing at the open door watching me kick the living day lights out of the 'beauty man' as I called him, still butt naked as the day I was born... I think. The Shu officer blushed heavily then quickly left when he heard Ling Tong staggering up the stairs towards the open door. The Wu officer heard the yells so peeked through the open door to see what was going, he raised an eyebrow at the events, but shrugged and closed the door. I still didn't notice and continued punish Mitsunari, after ten minutes passed I dragged the bloody mess outside and left him for the next person to pass by. I then returned to bed and dreamt of ways of how to destroy Kenshi.