Fenris slept fitfully in his new bed. His mind couldn't touch the Fade in the same way a mage could, but he kept dreaming of Hawke, thinking that the man was somehow reaching out for him from the Fade. "Hawke?!" Fenris cried out in his dream. "Hawke?! Are you there?"

Fenris felt himself being shaken awake. "Fenris, calm down, you're having a nightmare."

"Cullen?" Fenris startled awake.

"Yes, sorry to wake you, but you were screaming," Cullen apologized. "I could hear you all the way from my loft."

"My apologies, Commander," Fenris said. "I thought I felt Hawke calling out to me from the Fade, but I guess it was just a dream."

"It's alright," Cullen said. "I don't get much sleep myself. I still have nightmares from Kinloch."

"What do you do when you're plagued with nightmares?" Fenris asked. "Back in Kirkwall I would just raid the wine cellar at drank until I passed out."

"Well you certainly cannot go raiding our wine cellars," Cullen chuckled. "Often I wander the battlements, or if that doesn't work I go hit the training dummies until I'm too tired to stand."

Fenris contemplated for a moment. "Want to go hit some training dummies?"

Cullen smiled briefly and nodded. "Sounds like a fine plan. I'll go get my weapon and meet you at the top of the stairs in ten minutes.

...

When Fenris met Cullen he carried the Sword of Mercy slung over his shoulder, dressed in just his black leggings and a loose shirt. Cullen led Fenris down to the training yard and they each picked a dummy to assault.

At first Fenris went through a routine of training moves he used to have to practice when still in service to Danarius. As he warmed up, Fenris nonchalantly removed his shirt, before going back to slicing and hacking at the dummy. Cullen looked over at him and marveled how Fenris' markings really did swirl everywhere over his torso and back. Cullen had always wondered how far they went...now he felt himself being curious how they might be swirled over the taught muscles of his slender elven legs.

Cullen shook his head and went back to hitting his own dummy, trying to banish such impure thoughts from his mind.

Trying to focus at the task at hand, Cullen didn't at first notice when Fenris began hitting his dummy harder and harder. Cullen blinked and looked over at the elf and there were tears once again streaming down the elf's face as he cried. "Why?! Why Hawke? Why?!"

Fenris hacked the dummy to pieces before collapsing on his knees, wracked again with grief. Cullen wasn't sure what to do at first, but he felt bad for the elf. Hawke had been his whole world, and Fenris didn't seem to know what to do without the rogue at his side. Cullen dropped to his knees next to Fenris and the elf reached out and clung to him, sobbing into his shoulder. Cullen rubbed soothing circles over the elf's back, letting him cry himself out.

Cullen had never seen the stoic, broody warrior this emotional before today and it left him at a loss. He recalled his own grief during those torturous weeks at Kinloch Hold, watching his brothers-in-arms die. He wasn't sure if it could compare, but he still felt sympathy for the elf.

Fenris slowly composed himself again and extracted himself from Cullen's hold. "I apologize, that was…unworthy of me. Please, do not speak to anyone of this."

Cullen nodded. "Of course not. Are you sufficiently tired to attempt sleep?"

Fenris nodded, as he stood and grabbed his sword and shirt. They made their way back up to the ramparts and parted company at the stairs, Cullen heading towards his tower and Fenris towards his.

Cullen lay awake after that, trying to parse through the feelings that were fluttering in his chest. He was sure it was just because it was nice to have a familiar face from his past around again. He hadn't realized how much he missed Varric's presence until after Fenris arrived. The dwarf was always good company whenever Cullen occasioned to visit the Herald's Rest.

Cullen wondered if the elf would be equally good company.

...

The next morning Fenris met Cullen in his office to discuss how he could be of use to the Inquisition.

"I was thinking I could use your help in training the remaining troops and any new recruits we get," Cullen suggested, sitting behind his desk as Fenris paced in front of it. "Cassandra and I do all the sword and shield training, but we could use help on two-handed weapons training."

Fenris had never trained others before, but Danarius had insisted on several hours of training each day to keep him in shape. He recalled how he had been trained, and while it had always been one-on-one, he thought perhaps he could apply it to training a larger group.

"Alright, I think I could attempt that," Fenris nodded. "I will have to try and adapt the one-on-one training I'd had in Tevinter, so I could use your and Cassandra's advice on training larger groups as well."

"I had planned to introduce you to the troops and oversee the first few training sessions to guide you through it," Cullen explained. "I'll ask Cassandra to attend as well. I think we can begin as early as this afternoon, if you are agreeable?"

Fenris nodded. "I have nothing else planned."

Cullen smiled. "Excellent. Why don't you join Cassandra and I at the tavern for the mid-day meal and we can discuss how to approach the training sessions."

Fenris nodded and began to make his way towards the door when he stopped. "Where is the Inquisitor?"

Cullen smiled. "He's taking a much needed rest, with his lover," Cullen explained, and then frowned. "I know you have no love for Tevinter magisters, but you should know that Dorian is a valued member of the Inquisition. When they return, please try not to tear his heart out."

Fenris frowned. "Dorian? Dorian of house Pavus?"

Cullen nodded. "And not technically a magister, or so he keeps insisting," Cullen said. "So you knew him?"

Fenris nodded. "He and his father attended several parties my former master hosted. I seem to recall Dorian being disgusted by the entire display. I was often…one of the centerpieces," Fenris said with a shudder. "If his father still lives, then he would only be an Altus, but if he's the lover of the Inquisitor? He may have no status left at all."

Cullen nodded. "He did have some difficulties with his father, which is how he ended up joining the Inquisition in the first place. However, it's my understanding that they have since reconciled."

"Truly? His father accepts his relationship with the Inquisitor?" Fenris looked stunned.

"Dorian didn't give his father much of a choice in that," Cullen acknowledged. "It was either accept it or lose contact with his son forever. Considering that Halward had nearly succeeded in using a blood magic ritual against him, Dorian was well within his rights not to give the man a second chance."

Fenris nodded. "I have often said, what has magic touched that it does not spoil…"

Cullen frowned. "Now that is a bit unfair. There are many benefits to magic as well."

Fenris looked shocked. "You actually side with mages these days?"

Cullen nodded. "I know I've seen more than my fair share of abuse of magic, but since joining the Inquisition, I've seen the good in it as well."

Fenris huffed. "I almost began to believe that, with all the good Anders had been doing in Darktown. Until he too became too blinded by power."

Cullen nodded. Perhaps Anders wasn't the best topic for them to discuss. "Mahanon…the Inquisitor…is a good man and a powerful mage and has led the Inquisition with an amazing amount of patience and grace," Cullen explained. "He's helped open my eyes on a number of fronts regarding mages."

"I look forward to meeting him then," Fenris said before he growled. "And his Tevinter lover."

Cullen chuckled at that. That was more like the Fenris he knew. "I best try and get through some of this paperwork. I'll see you later."

Fenris nodded curtly and left.

Cullen took a deep breath and rang for a runner. He best prepare Cassandra before they met with Fenris at the Tavern later.

...

Cullen and Cassandra arrived at the Tavern just as Fenris was seating himself at a corner table. "Fenris, this is Seeker Cassandra Pentaghast. Seeker, this is Fenris."

Fenris gave Cassandra a polite nod and a grunted in greeting. Cullen is pleased to see Fenris being more like…well…Fenris. It was easier to keep his professional composure when the elf was being his more normal, broody, detached self.

As Cassandra sat she offered Fenris her sympathies. "You have my sincerest condolences on your loss. Hawke was…very brave. He saved the Inquisitor's life and by extension the Inquisition itself. His sacrifice will not be forgotten."

Fenris nodded. "Thank you, Seeker."

Once they had their food ordered, Cassandra immediately got down to business. She and Cullen outlined their training plans and where they had gaps with two-handed weapons training.

Fenris thought their plans were solid and agreed to begin implementing them during the afternoon training session.

"So…Fenris," Cassandra began. "I've always wanted to know. How did it feel to kill your former master?"

"A combination of relief and dissatisfaction," Fenris replied bluntly. "I had been seeking freedom for so many years and when I finally achieved it, it tasted like ashes. If it weren't for Hawke, I would have had no purpose. I suppose I should be grateful to the Inquisition for taking me in or I would be right back to that place in my life again."

Cassandra hung on very word Fenris said and the elf finally noticed it. "Let me guess…you're a fan of Varric's work?"

Cassandra blushed profusely. "I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to stare. It's just incredible to meet yet another person from the Tale of the Champion."

Fenris grumbled. "I do wish the dwarf hadn't written that book."

Cullen couldn't help the smile that Fenris' broodiness was bringing to his lips. It was good to see the elf more like his old self. Perhaps the previous night's activities with the training dummies had done more good than he'd thought.

After they finished their meal Cullen, Cassandra and Fenris went to the training ground where the recruits scheduled for that afternoon's training were already lined up and ready.

"Recruits, attention!" Cullen cried out. The recruits all snapped more or less to attention, the newer ones still being a little slow, but following their fellows well enough.

"Cassandra and I are here to introduce to you your new trainer," Cullen continued. "He is an expert at two-handed weapons combat and will begin training you with these weapons beginning today."

"What about the sword and shield training, Commander?" one of the recruits called out.

"Cassandra and I will continue your sword and shield training in the morning training sessions, while Fenris will begin two-handed training in the afternoons," Cullen replied.

"But…he's an elf. Aren't they more suited for ranged weapons?" Another recruit queried.

Cullen growled. He'd hoped they had gotten past such prejudices considering their own Inquisitor was an elf.

"Fenris, I believe a demonstration is in order," Cullen suggested. "What do you say, feel up for a bit of sparring?"

"I would love to, Commander," Fenris said with a lopsided smirk.

Cullen unsheathed his sword and shield and readied himself as Fenris unsheathed the Sword of Mercy from his back. Fenris very easily swung the sword around and assumed a battle-ready stance.

Each of the recruits had sparred with Cullen at least once during a training exercise and they all knew how good the Commander was. He often had them flat on their backs within moments.

Cullen gave a curt nod to Fenris when he was ready and Fenris began the attack, sweeping the large sword effortlessly at Cullen, who effectively blocked it with his shield. However, Fenris did not relent, and he kept swinging the large sword over and over at Cullen, pressing him back.

Cullen tried to stand his ground and push back, but it was useless under Fenris' relentless blows. Soon Cullen buckled and fell backwards and even then Fenris continued to rain down the blows onto his shield.

"Enough, Fenris!" Cullen cried out. "I think they get the point."

At the sound of his name Fenris came back to himself. "Apologies, Commander," said the elf, reaching out to help Cullen back up.

The recruits looked at Fenris with a new level of awe and fear.

"Now are there any more questions as to your new trainer's capabilities?" Cullen asked.

"No, sir!" all the recruits said in unison.

...

Fenris spent the rest of the afternoon teaching the recruits how to properly draw, hold, and swing two-handed weapons. Afterwards, Cullen led Fenris to the hot spring baths that were located beneath the main structure in Skyhold.

They unclothed and slipped into the steaming water, sitting opposite of each other in one of the larger pools. "That went remarkably well," Cullen commented, trying very hard not to look at the lyrium markings swirling up Fenris' legs.

So they really do go everywhere.

"Yes, after our little demonstration," Fenris smirked. "I think I owe you an apology for that, Commander."

"It's quite alright, Fenris," Cullen sighed. "I know you're going through a rough time right now. I just hope you find yourself at home here."

"I really appreciate your friendship, Cullen," Fenris said. "I felt lost ever since Hawke left me behind, and after I the letter arrived from Varric…"

Cullen nodded. "Varric took it hard. He blamed Mahanon for the decision, but I believed the Inquisitor when he said that Hawke had insisted on being the one to stay behind."

Fenris nodded. "Oh I'm quite sure he did. Probably because his brother became a Grey Warden after being infected by the Blight during our expedition down in the Deep Roads. Alistair was actually the Warden who took him in and saved Carver's life. Hawke always felt like he owed the Grey Wardens, Alistair in particular, for that."

Cullen nodded. "That's actually starting to make more sense then. Hawke always was one to just throw himself into a fight. I'm still astonished he survived the fight with the Arishok."

Cullen and Fenris finished bathing and returned to their respective quarters. When Fenris didn't appear in the Tavern after the final dinner bell rang, Cullen ordered a tray and some wine and brought it up to the elf's quarters.

Cullen knocked on the door but received no response. He felt awkward just holding the tray of food and wine so after several minutes he finally just let himself into the elf's quarters. Fenris was always notorious for never locking doors.

When Cullen entered he saw that Fenris was passed out on his bed, still dressed in most of his armor. The exhaustion and lack of sleep from the night before had finally caught up with him apparently.

Cullen set the tray of food down and went over to the sleeping elf and decided to try and at least take off the more uncomfortable parts of his armor so he could sleep more easily. Fenris didn't even stir as Cullen began to remove his gauntlets and the metal chest piece.

Once Fenris was down to just his leggings and shirt, Cullen grabbed a blanket and covered Fenris, tucking him in.

Cullen looked down at Fenris, his features peaceful in sleep. Fenris always looked young, being an elf, but in sleep he looked even younger, more innocent.

Cullen wasn't sure why, but helping Fenris like this actually made him feel…happy.

Joining the Inquisition had been the best decision Cullen had made in his life so far. His position here had given him a chance to get past the ugliness of Kinloch Hold and to atone for the events in Kirkwall.

Keeping busy and making friends within the Inquisition had left him feeling better about himself than he had in a long awhile. However, he couldn't really recall being actually happy. It had been a very long time since he'd felt even the glimmer of happiness.

Cullen didn't fully understand why helping an old acquaintance made him feel happy, but it did. Perhaps it was yet another way to atone for things in Kirkwall, to atone to Hawke specifically, who had tried to warn him time and again about Meredith.

Perhaps helping to take care of Hawke's companion was a good way to honor his memory.

Cullen made his way back to his tower and stayed up late into the night working on a pile of missives from Josephine and Leliana. He found himself straining to hear, in case Fenris had another nightmare, but tonight all was silent.