Author's Note: Thank you very much for your kind words and encouragement, it's greatly appreciated! I thought I should just mention that the flash back bits won't be in any kind of order, since I'm not actually trying to write two stories at once;) Also I'm sorry about the spelling and other mistakes, I'm going to use the age old excuse that English isn't my first language and that things slip past because of it. Other than that, I hope you enjoy!

The First Cut

Chapter 2: Past and Present

It's midafternoon when Emma parks near Granny's Diner.

Her back is twitching a little, shoulder stiff from the long ride, but she ignores it in favor of taking in the sight of her home town. It's not that different from what she remembers as a child, Main Street still busy on a Saturday afternoon despite the milder weather, people shopping or heading out to late lunches. The sameness of it settles her a bit, makes her release a breath she didn't realize she was holding in. Leaving New York had felt a little bit like running away and until this very moment, she hadn't been able to make that thought disappear.

The drive had given Emma a lot of time to think, to prepare for the moment that she'd be back home for the first time in over ten years. A part of her had feared crossing the border into town, had remembered every bad thing that ever happened to her when she lived here. The biggest part of her thought of Mary Margaret and Graham though, thought of her mother baking cupcakes for her eleventh birthday party while humming some Beatles song under her breath and slapping grubby fingers away from the icing bowl. So when the sign for Stroybrook came into view, Emma actually sped up, because she'd had enough experience with fear to know how to deal with it at this point; head on.

The bad memories wouldn't ever be able to overshadow the great ones she made here. Her father's actions could never outweigh her mother's, her friends' unconditional love making up for the loss of her first real love. Time away had taught her that. So she got off her motorcycle, removed her helmet and inhaled deeply a scent, red spruce and faintly salty, that she could only ever associate with home and smiled. For the first time in months Emma felt more like herself. Not exactly the angry girl that drove out of town ten years ago, but also not the woman who couldn't find much meaning to her life in the last year in New York.

Smile still in place she removed her small bag from the Triumph's seat, settling it over her shoulder as she let her helmet dangle at her side, and made her way to the dinner's door. When she pushed it open she was hit with sounds and smells that pulled at her memory once again, her face splitting even wider as a rush of belonging settled over her.

"Jesus H Christ sucking on a lollypop, Emma Swan, what the hell are you doing here?!" Ruby practically howled as she plowed into her, long arms closing around her neck with such delight that Emma chocked a bit in her grip and almost toppled over.

Maybe making Graham keep her coming home a surprise from her friends had been a mistake. Emma didn't think getting choked to death on her first day back was how it was supposed to go at any rate.

"Good to see you too, Ruby. Now how about you let go so I can breathe, yeah?" Ruby did just that, but then she also slugged her in the shoulder hard enough to probably bruise. Emma was just glad it wasn't her bad shoulder. "You asshole, why didn't I know you were coming back?!"

Emma would have answered if it wasn't for the second body that hit her from the side, this one harder and taller, lifting her clean off her feet and swinging her around. "Em!" David's voice boomed so loudly in her ear it rang, but Emma was smiling so hard she didn't even care.

"Put me down, you big oaf." He didn't of course, simply stopped the mad spinning and held her against his chest, the tips of her toes an inch off the floor. "No way I'm putting you down. I haven't seen you in seven years, Emma, I'm hugging you until you pass out or my arms fall asleep."

She laughed as she took in the smile on David's face. The last time she'd seen him there was still a touch of boy in him, cheeks not as lean and the skin at the corners of his eyes lacking the faint laugh lines, but he was as solid and warm as he was back then. He was still the big, dumb quarterback that had more heart than sense and she still loved him for it.

"Aw, come on you big girl, put me down and shake my hand like a normal guy, will ya?"

He blew a cherry against her neck in answer and she kicked him in the shin, laughing when he dropped her with a soft grunt. "It's just good to see you, Em." He smiled again, all big and wide, ruffling her hair in much the same way as he had done when they were teenagers. "And Mary Margaret is going to have a heart attack when she sees you, you know that right?"

Emma does, because if there's one person Mary Margaret loves about as much as she does the man standing in front of her right now, it's Emma herself. Of all the things Emma has missed from home, Mary Margaret is the thing she'd missed the most with Graham a close second. There was something to be said of a friendship that started before either of them could even remember, of growing up with someone and sharing most of your history with them not because you're related to them, but because you chose them to be in your life.

"Yeah, well. Where is the old schoolmarm anyway? I kinda want to, you know, say hi."

Emma was quite desperate to see her best friend, the giddy high she currently had going from being back making her twitchy and impatient as she rocked back on her heels.

"Oh, I think she's just about done with Saturday soccer practice, so she's probably on her way already." Ruby snorted at David, shaking her head as she looked over at Emma. "She's so not. The little monsters love her, so she ends up staying after practice and playing a match with them. All of them against her, so they can showcase their new skills she says. More often than not she ends up at the bottom of a human pile-up consisting of nine year olds. It's ridiculous how she gets owned by a bunch of kids." The last is said with a magnificent eye roll, but the affection is still very clear.

"It's not her fault she's the best damn teacher that school has and the kids know it." The pride in David's voice is unwavering, his voice sweet as he shrugs. "If that means she's twenty minutes late from soccer practice I can live with it, she's worth the wait."

Ruby makes gagging noises as she turns back towards the diner counter.

"Let me go get you some coffee or something before Romeo here makes me lose my lunch. Then you're spilling the beans on why you're here and we didn't know about it!"

David leads her to a booth with a warm hand against her back and eyes soft as he watches her with a small smile. Emma can't help but smile back, realizing that she's smiled more in the last five minutes than she's had any reason to in the last year, but shrugs it off as she slides into her seat. The past doesn't matter now, she's working towards her future and that's all that counts.

"It's so good to see you, Emma, especially after…I guess I'm just trying to say it's good that you're here and healthy. I'm still sorry I couldn't come out to New York with Mary Margaret last year, because I wanted to be there for you. Skype just doesn't cut it in a situation like that, but if I went Graham would have had to stay, so…"

Emma kicks him again, but gently this time, her smile a little sad as she taps a finger against her helmet on the seat next to her. "It's fine. I know you wanted to be there and that's all that matters to me. I mean there wasn't much you could have done, anyway."

David shrugs, fingers twisting together on the table in front of him. "Maybe, but I would have rather sat and felt useless in the hospital with them than here on my own." Emma finally feels her smile drop. "I'm sorry, David. I never wanted you guys to have to go through that…"

David abruptly waves whatever else she wants to say away. "You didn't ask to get shot. It's a risk of the job, I know that better than most, but it's not something you did to us and need to apologize for."

Ruby shows up then carrying a tray laden with coffee and what looks to be every sugary pastry she could find. Emma just gratefully groans when most of said pastries are dumped in front of her. "A god among men, Ruby, that's what you are."

Ruby smirks and sits down next to her, bumping Emma with her hip until she's settled and then pinning her down with a stare.

"Now spill."

Emma snorts into her pastry, realizing Ruby has her nicely trapped in the booth for her interrogation.

"I'm back." Ruby raises a dark eyebrow and tilts her head a bit. "You're back?" Emma nods while she swallows the last bite of pastry. "Uh huh, I'm back. You're looking at Storybrook's newest Deputy." She ignores Ruby's squealing and goes in on pastry number two.

David's back to grinning like a loon, hand slapping the table so hard Emma's coffee sloshes over the rim of her mug.

"I knew he was being more cagey than usual about the new deputy! Every time I asked when we'd be getting some help, other than Leroy, he'd just smile and sip his coffee and shrug. It was driving me nuts, but I think I might just forgive him for this one."

Mopping up her spilt coffee Emma gave herself a moment to just take a breath. It was almost a little overwhelming how much she had to be thankful for. It was the feeling she lacked last year when she woke up in a hospital, alive despite having two bullet holes in her. The feeling of realizing there were people in your life that loved you, that made having another day on earth worth it. The truth was when she woke up in a room alone, groggy and disorientated, everything dulled down by the painkillers in her system, she still had one very clear thought; if she had died that day, no one in that city would have gave a damn.

Sure, Emma had made friends of sorts in New York. She worked with a good team of guys, her job probably the most important thing to her, and she was invited for beers after work and the occasional dinner, but mostly her life outside of that was very solitary. Work came first, food and sleep fitted in between the few hours she wasn't working a case and only sporadically would she allow someone into her bed and then only very fleetingly.

It was a lonely way to live, something she never thought would ever bother her, but hurt and afraid she'd felt the emptiness of her life acutely.

Now she looked up at David and his smile, felt Ruby warm against her side and knew that feeling alone wasn't something she'd have to struggle with anymore the way she did the past year.

"So you won't mind having me a round then?" Emma watched as David shook his head only to suddenly stop, frowning. "Well, no, I'm pretty sure it's great that you're going to be working with me, but it's not going to make up for the fact that Mary Margaret's going to want to spend every waking moment with you now you're here."

Both women just laugh at David's sad face, his shoulders slumped as he sighs. "It was hard enough getting her to notice me in high school with you around."

Emma snorts and reaches across the table, flicking David in the knuckle.

"You realize that eighty percent of our conversations were about how stupidly in love she was with you and if I thought it would be too forward of her if she jumped you in the middle of the hallway and sucked your face off?" David smiles dumbly at that. "I'm pretty sure she's not going to abandon you like a lost puppy in the rain just because I'm back." Emma takes a sip of coffee and grimaces. "Besides, if our Junior Year is anything to go by her nights will be all yours at least."

Ruby snickers when David's ears turn a little red, but Emma is still a little too traumatized by the amount of times she'd walked in on them doing whatever it was that two horny, lovesick teenagers did together, to laugh at it.

"It's fine, I mean if I can deal with having to share her with half this town and their kids, I can probably manage it with you too."

Emma raises an eyebrow sardonically.

"How very generous of you."

Before David can reply, Ruby shifts up and out of the booth, finger pointing dangerously at Emma.

"Look, I need to get back to work, but when I get off tonight, we?" She wags her finger back and forth between Emma and herself. "We are going down to 'The Three Pigs' and we are celebrating with lots and lots of cocktails."

Emma nods, watching her leave, but then the door opening catches her eye and she sees a flash of dark hair that has her lifting half out of her seat, but a second later she falls back again. Whatever David says is lost on her as she blinks slowly.

It's not Mary Margaret that walks into the diner.

No, the woman that walks in has her hand on the shoulder of a rather grim looking boy still dressed in soccer shorts and a sweatshirt, mouth tight as she obviously tries to steer him towards the counter.

"I don't see why I should get in trouble, Josh pushed me first." The little boy sounds petulant, small fists balled at his sides and Emma watches as the woman sighs, eyes briefly closing before she opens them again and runs a hand through his short hair.

When the boy pulls back, she flinches.

"Henry, it's not about who pushed who first, it's about the fact that instead of using your words to work things out, you just pushed him back. You know better, I've taught you better than that; physically hurting someone just because it's easier than talking to them when you're angry is never acceptable."

The boy, Henry, looks up at his mother and pouts. "Dad said that if I don't stand up for myself, people will walk all over me. Josh started it, I was just standing up for myself and if Dad was here, he'd understand."

He storms off towards the door leading to the bathrooms and Emma watches as slender fingers run shakily through dark hair, watches as the woman takes a deep breath and finally takes in her surroundings. Waits for eyes that she remembers are dark and warm to settle on her for the first time in ten years.

When it happens, she's only half surprised by the strong tug of emotion she feels low in her belly. The slow burning anger that she'd felt for such a long time is at least expected, but the immediate sensation of wanting that follows isn't.

As she feels herself visibly shiver once in reaction, she takes a small measure of pleasure in the fact that Regina turns a shade of pale that someone with her complexion really shouldn't be able to.

/

Emma doesn't cry in the shower.

She mostly just stands under the rapidly cooling spray and tries to concentrate on every breath she takes. It's easier than letting her mind wander to other things, things more complicated and dangerous than she can handle right now. She doesn't want to think about the fact that this is the third night she's staying at the cabin with Regina's permission, or why she's staying there in the first place or about the massive fight she'd just had with the girl she's barely known for two days.

Or more accurately, why she feels so very upset about the fight in the first place.

She doesn't know Regina, shouldn't care that her flat out refusal to go to the sheriff about what her father did upset Regina so much she practically vibrated with emotion, but she does. She cares, because Regina was there when Emma needed someone. When it finally sank in what her father had done, how scared she had been, a perfect stranger opened up her arms to Emma and let her cry.

A soft knock at the bathroom door brings her head up from the tile she'd been leaning against. "Emma, look, I'm sorry I upset you. Will you please come out and we can talk about it? Calmly I mean." Regina's voice sounds strained and tired, adding to the list of things Emma finds she cares about even if she shouldn't.

Turning the water off, she steps out and reaches for her towel. "Just give me a minute and I'll be there." Regina doesn't reply, but Emma knows she'll be waiting for her.

She isn't wrong. When she steps out of the bathroom Regina is leaning up against the small kitchen table, fingers playing with the hem of her short, green summer dress. When she looks over to Emma the dress flutters out from between her fingers and she pushes up, walking the few steps to where Emma herself is standing.

"I'm sorry. This is none of my business and I had no right to try to force you to do something you clearly don't want to, but I…" Emma bites the side of her lip, sticks her hands into the back pockets of her jeans as she waits for her to continue.

Finally she prompts her. "But what?"

Regina gives a helpless shrug. "I don't want him to hurt you again."

It's said so very quietly, but it resonates loudly in Emma's head. She swallows hard, blinking back sudden tears. "I know. I don't want him to hurt me either."

Emma wonders how Regina manages to pull these truths from her so easily. Emma had tried so many times to tell someone about how things with her dad were. She really had, but every time she looked at Mary Margaret or Graham or the school guidance counselor, she simply couldn't push the words past her lips. So why things basically fall out of her mouth around Regina baffles her.

"Then what do you plan to do, Emma? What would you have me do?"

"Why would you need to do anything, Regina? You don't owe me anything, this isn't your problem."

Regina gives a magnificent eye roll, her frustration clear, but who it is really aimed at Emma doesn't know.

"It isn't my problem, no, but I can't seem to just…"

She doesn't finish the sentence, but Emma didn't need her to. "You can't seem to walk away, even if you know you should." It is the one thing Emma at least understands, because she feels the same way.

She should have left that first morning after she woke up on top of Regina and almost cracked her rib with her elbow when she sat up, forcing a god awful squeaking sound from Regina's throat, but she didn't. She stayed despite the awkward way they woke up, because she liked the way Regina finally huffed out a graveled 'Good morning' and pushed Emma's hair up and off her face. She wasn't sure why she liked it, but she did and she came back that night knowing she couldn't really do anything else.

Regina finally nods. "No, I can't walk away and I don't know why. It's very aggravating."

Emma snorts out a laugh and makes her way to the old couch, sprawling out on it and sighing as she looks over at Regina.

"This blows."

Regina's eyebrows come together in a deep frown, one hand back at the hem of her dress as the other slowly gestured between the two of them.

"This blows?" Her distaste for the word is obvious, but Emma ignores teasing her about it in favor of explaining herself better.

"No, the thing with my dad blows. The part where I don't think I want to go home again even If I know he probably wouldn't do it again blows. Growing up blows."

Regina smiles as she finally comes and sits down beside Emma, hands folded in her lap.

"I guess it does, but you'll have to get used to it; you've got a lot of growing up left to do."

Emma twists in her seat, facing Regina, and cocks an eyebrow up. "Of course, because being so much wiser than I am you'd know what you're talking about." She finds her head tilting to the side as she takes in the sight before her. "You make yourself sound years older than me, but you really aren't."

It's true, too. Emma looks at Regina and she doesn't see age and experience in her face, she only sees another girl looking back at her, albeit a very pretty one. Though she doesn't think pretty is the right way to put it, not when her skin glows the way it does or when the shape of her mouth is something Emma has found herself inadvertently thinking off these last two days, despite never having noticed something like that about another girl before. No, Regina is the definition of beauty with her long dark hair and her warm eyes.

She finds she can't look away, not now that she's finally really seeing Regina, so she lets her eyes wander as they will. There's the hollow at the base of her neck where she can see Regina's heartbeat, her hands on her lap with their slim yet strong looking fingers, the skin of her thigh peeking out from underneath her dress. She looks at it all and feels how every breath she takes seems to be lacking in air, only the smell of something fresh and apple scented reaching her.

She doesn't understand the slow heat that starts at the base of her spine when she looks back up into Regina's face, dark eyes staring back at her so intensely, but then Regina parts her lips and lets out a sound that's somewhere between a sigh and a groan and she gets it.

She gets it and there's nothing she can do to stop herself, because giving the feeling creeping warmly up her spine a name also gives it power. So despite Regina's soft, cautioning whimper of 'Emma', she leans in and succumbs to her want.

Electricity explodes like a star at the base of her skull, her gut clenching in reaction as she settles her mouth against Regina's and tastes.

A whole world is destroyed in that moment and when Regina haltingly slants her mouth in response and presses forward towards Emma, another is born.

/

There are a thousand different things Emma would prefer doing right this second, but much like she sped up when she crossed the town border, she makes herself get up and walk towards Regina.

Dark eyes trail down her body almost unthinkingly, like Regina doesn't realize she's taking stock of Emma now compared to Emma of ten years ago, but Emma just clenches her jaw and presses forward. When she's no more than three steps away, Regina reaches out towards the counter beside her and grips it.

Emma's not even sure what to say, or what she thought she'd achieve by facing Regina, but she doesn't get a chance to find out, because the door opens again and this time it is Mary Margaret that walks in.

For the third time that day, Emma finds herself on the receiving end of a full body slam that morphs into a hug, someone yelling her name loudly in her ear while she's chocked half to death.

"I'm happy to see you too, Mary Margaret."

This time though, she doesn't wrangle herself out of the hug, she just brings her arms around her best friend and hugs her back. If she cries a little, it's because Mary Margaret does it first, and if she ignores the woman standing stoically off to her right, it's because she's once again reminded that there are more good memories in Storybrook than bad.

So she walks them back to the table where David is smiling at his crying girlfriend and Emma slides back into the booth, managing to wipe the slight evidence of a few tears off her cheeks without anyone really noticing.

Anyone except for the woman that's left standing alone at the counter waiting for her angry, resentful son to return as she watches other people be happy, just like she's done for most of her life already.

So there we go, if you like it I'm glad, if you didn't I'm, well, not surprised. lol