Chapter 2
Charlie woke me up in the middle of the night. Apparently I was crying violently, and had woken him up. He was sitting on my bed, he had turned my bedside lamp on before he shook me awake. Charlie stared in to my eyes. Yup I had definitely been crying, his face was blurry and my eyes stung as I struggled to open my puffy lids. I wrapped my arms around my torso and brought my knees as close to my chest as my body would allow.
"You didn't warn me about this, honey." Charlie said sympathetically. Hurt, anger, and desperation were in his eyes.
"I'm sorry, I thought they would stop when I came here, I truly did."
"Don't, don't apologize. It's going to be okay, you are safe with me here Bells." he forced a warm smile for my benefit. "After all, I am the police chief of this here small town. Nobody will dare cross my baby girl."
"Thanks Dad." I didn't have the heart to tell him he was wrong. People don't care about who you are, who you're dad is, who they're dating, if it suits them, they will hurt you.
"Can I ask what you were dreaming about?" he pried, "It might help to talk about it. It's not the same, but when you're mother left with you it helped me to talk about it."
"I…. I don't remember what I was dreaming about." I lied. I did remember. I had this dream almost every night. The darkness in it haunted me, reminding me of my mistakes. There was darkness, all I could see was darkness. Then I started to feel dizzy, the alcohol released itself into my bloodstream. I could hear the laughter, music, and voices over the music. The sounds faded to background noise, coming from downstairs. I knew where I was. I could smell the alcohol, and feel…. And that's where I woke up. Sometimes it went further, but Charlie had saved me from that tonight and I was grateful for him. Renee had tried waking me up, but it hurt her to hear about my nightmares she was less strong than even I was. Eventually she just watched me work myself through it in my sleep, because she knew talking about it was harder for me.
"You want me to stay with you until you fall asleep, hon?" Charlie asked. I looked over at the time, it was 4:17 in the morning. Sleep seemed impossible now.
"I think I'm just going to stay up and read or something. Going to sleep for two more hours isn't that important." I answered him, I was always afraid that when I went back to sleep the darkness in my nightmares would be lifted, and I would be able to see what I didn't see that night.
"Okay, I was going to stay up anyways. Do you want company?" He was more persistent now then ever, I didn't expect this from Charlie. Then I surprised myself.
"Sure Dad, that would be nice." We went down into the living room and he popped in an old movie. It was the Lion King. When I was little and came to visit Charlie during the summer I watched this movie relentlessly, over and over. That's why I stared at him with surprise when he told me we should watch it. I was sure he had thrown it away after the millionth time we had seen it together. He told me he had hid it from me in his room, hoping one day, though he was sick to death of it then, that we could watch it together when I was older. I laughed, cried, and then smiled. The movie still made me laugh at all the right lines, and I still cried when Simba found his father lying there dead. But I smiled at the end, because Simba faced his demons and conquered them. I hoped I could have a similar triumph, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
During the next few weeks, Charlie's good friend Billy Black came over with his teenage son Jacob, he wasn't much younger than I was. They would watch the game together and Jacob and I caught up, we used to be forced into the situations when I came to visit Charlie. Jacob was happy whenever he came to visit with Billy, and being around him was almost a comfort. The only person I truly felt safe with was Charlie, he was the only person here in Forks that I knew with every fiber in my being that I could count on. I was surprised the day I came home and found the Black's truck in the driveway and they were not there. I walked into the house, dropping my bag by the door and hanging my parka on it's designated hook and called for Charlie.
"Dad, what happened to Billy's truck?" Charlie was in the kitchen, fixing himself a cold cut sandwich. "you want me to fix you something tastier?"
"No thanks Bells, but that isn't Billy's truck anymore. Jacob put up a stink about the not wanting to drive it when he turned 16, said he'd rather drive his Rabbit. So Billy said he wanted to give it to you."
"I can't take it Dad." A truck was a very big gift.
"too late, it's yours. I'm off to the station for a few more hours though, unless you want me to stay?" Before I came, the police station had been Charlie's wife and kids. I didn't want him to neglect his work because of me so I reassured him I would be more than okay, had to study for a test and he was gone.
Other than gaining a vehicle, the next few weeks were unimportant. Charlie and I grew closer, he would wake me up in the middle of the night when I began to cry and we would head down stairs and watch the lion king. When the death scene came I would go to the kitchen to make myself tea and Charlie some coffee, I didn't want to cry anymore.
Edward must have dropped out of school because he hated me so much, his brothers and sisters were still there so I figured I had drove him out. But I barely noticed his absence, I was never really there in biology anyways because I had taken an AP course of it last year in Phoenix. Mr. Banner let me get away not participating in class. There was a test on during my second biology class, he thought I cheated though it were impossible, nobody sat next to me. I told him about my previous class, and he felt sorry I had to sit through the general course.
It was the day that I walked into the science room and saw the seat next to mine occupied that it registered he had been gone for weeks. After a few minutes of contemplating skipping the class, I positioned myself in the seat next to the mysterious boy. He turned his head and smiled at me, as if nothing ever happened that first day. Maybe it didn't, maybe I was losing my mind.
"Hey, I'm Edward Cullen, you're Bella? Police Chief Swan's daughter." he introduced himself in that same soothing voice. I knew the comfort of his smile would disappear and the anger and hate would reappear. Determined not to fall for his trickery, I nodded quickly then turned to look out the window.
I felt my cell phone vibrate in my bag, and there was a few minutes before class would start so I retrieved my cell from it's hiding place. I only heard it vibrate once so I knew it was a text message, "must be Renee," I thought to myself. Edward was looking at me curiously, as I fumbled with the bag and the phone. Flipping it open and pressing the "OK" button was all it took for my heart to sink.
"SLUT" was all it said, from a number with the Arizona area code. It didn't take me long to recognize the number. My heart started to race, and my breathing sped up. All I could see were the four little letters staring at me as I read them over and over involuntarily.
"bella? Are you okay?" a soft voice asked. I couldn't answer, all I could do was shoot out of my chair and run for the exit. I almost tripped over a kids backpack in the aisle but I didn't care, I had to leave and escape all the eyes I knew would be looking at me as my body began to convulse. My breaths came aggressively and I couldn't see anything but the damn cell phone in my hand, so I tossed it to the floor as I felt my body crumble to the hard tile of the hallway with it. The floor buzzed a few more times, and I knew it was a few more messages. They wouldn't stop, I should have known.
Cold hands weaved under my body, turning me and picking me up. It was Edward, an extremely strong Edward. "Put me down," I demanded feebly. And he did, but it was in a vacant room with sofas, tables, and vending machines. I didn't remember him moving. We were standing by one of those couches, and I threw myself on it. I didn't mean to, and I definitely didn't want to but I couldn't restrain the painful sobs coming from my chest. I could feel Edward was sitting next to me, and I didn't want him to be there.
"I'm sorry." he apologized, for what I do not know, maybe it was for intruding on a very private moment. "I saw what the message said on accident, and Mr. Banner told me to make sure you were alright and found the nurse's office."
"Edward?" a voice I didn't recognize called from the doorway. I stared at the floor, not caring who was there. Freedom from this prison was all I wanted, all I cared for.
"Bella, this is my sister Alice." he introduced us, though the occasion was unconventional.
"Edward, why don't you go back to class. I'll stay here and make sure she's all right." The soft voice rang. Edward swiftly stood up, I felt him stare at me with worried eyes. I heard the noises of a conversation between them, but couldn't make out the words. I didn't care too, I just let the sobs take over me.
A new pair of cool hands began soothingly rubbing my arched back. The ball my body formed was painful, but it was easier to calm myself down this way by letting the uncomfortable position of my body distract me from the messages that filled my inbox. Risking my "pull-it-together" ritual, I peered up at the stranger named Alice next to me. She didn't smile, frown, or look angry. She just sat there, almost thoughtlessly, without a care in the world rubbing my back slowly in a comforting manner. That state of mind, I longed for that. To think of nothing, to let nothing affect you. Even the annoyingly, overdramatic sobs coming from the stranger next to you. Someday, I would achieve that level of emptiness, I would rid my mind of this pain.
"Hi" she said, when she noticed my peering had transformed into a careful study. Her hand stop on my lower back, and I noticed I was no longer crying, so I straightened into a better seated position.
"How do you do that?" I asked her, but she just looked confused. "Sit there as if, like you're made of stone. Empty of any emotions."
"It wasn't my place to show any emotion, you seem to be in pain and I didn't want to berate you. So I decided to wait until you began to talk, and here you have." then she smiled, as if I was speaking complete rubbish she smiled at me. But it wasn't mocking, or a fake half-hearted smile. There was genuine sincerity in the way her lips curved up. "I'm Alice, Edward's sister."
"I'm Bella, thank-you. You didn't need to stay with me." I said, but there was something about her that made me never want her to leave. I found a friend, someone who didn't know me that stayed by my side in my desperate time of need.
And that is what Alice became, she ditched her family, even her doting boyfriend Jasper, from that day on at lunch and came to sit with me at the table with Jessica, Mike and their friends. They didn't seem to mind though, and Alice always reassured me when I asked. We found out that we had two classes together, English and Pre-Calculus. And we were always in the same wing each period if we weren't in class together, so we became inseparable at school. Alice began to bring me out of the hard shell I had created, she comforted me when I cried. She was to me, what none of my peers had ever been. Charlie and I both were grateful for her, for as soon as she came into my life the nightmares began to subside and my face was smiling more often. I loved her even more for never questioning me about why I was overcome that day by the agonizing weeping.