Scars and Souvenirs
Part I – Addiction
Season 8, approximately concurrent with "Affinity"
Chapter I: Delight and Discovery
Based upon Stargate: SG-1
- . - - - . -
Jack fiddled with his hat. He didn't know what else to do with his hands.
It was just a regular Wednesday.
Regular, except that he was about to have a meeting with the President. The President. Of the United States. Not the local gun club or fishing derby committee. The United States . . . of America.
He liked Henry Hayes, he did. He was a good man. He was smart, and liked the Stargate program. Plus, he canned Kinsey after a week or so in office. That was just priceless.
"The President will see you now, General," the secretary at the desk told him.
Jack stood up, fixed his uniform jacket, and let himself into the Oval Office.
"Jack," President Hayes stood up to greet him, offering him his hand.
Jack shook it. "Good morning, Mister President. Thank you for seeing me on short notice."
Hayes closed the door behind Jack and then offered him a seat, which he took. "Well, when the man in charge of keeping out the evil interstellar aliens says 'we need to talk,' I think that's a good reason to rearrange one's schedule."
Jack shook his head. "There aren't any problems at the SGC, or with the Goa'uld, except for the ones we already have of course . . . I just thought I needed to tell you this in person. Frankly, when you canned Kinsey, I knew you were a good guy and I think you deserve at least some type of explanation."
Hayes' brow furrowed. "Where's this going, Jack?"
"I'm resigning my commission with the Air Force."
Hayes leaned back in the couch he was sitting on. "What?"
"I'm resigning my commission, Sir."
"Is this about the Air Force or the Stargate?"
"Don't get me wrong, I love working at the SGC, but I can't stay in the Air Force any longer."
Hayes leaned forward again. "Why?"
Jack broke eye contact for a second. He had planned what he wanted to say the entire plane ride here, but somehow, he had lost those words. He thought back to the conversation he had had with Martouf three months previous.
"Carter means more to me than anything else in the world . . . the galaxy, really," he had said. Martouf had merely nodded. "I guess what I'm trying to say is: . . . Are you okay with the possibility of Carter and me . . ."
"If you are asking my permission to court Samantha, I do not understand why. I no longer have that type of responsibility for her."
Jack sighed. "On Earth, friends don't just date friends' ex-girlfriends."
"You consider me a friend, then?" Martouf asked.
Jack nodded. "Yeah, kind of."
Martouf smiled. "I consider you a friend, as well." After a short pause, he continued, "It became apparent to me long ago that Samantha cared for someone other than myself. It did not take me long at all to realize that someone was you. I know that Samantha would be happy with you, baring any unusual circumstances. If I may be frank — and I say this as your friend — I'm surprised you have not attempted this before now."
Jack ran his fingers through his hair. "Thanks, Marty."
"There's been a few things that I've wanted to do for a long time, and I simply can't do those things while being in the Air Force." He mentally slapped himself, that sounded awful.
Hayes cocked his head questioningly. "Like what?"
"I'd rather not reveal specifics, if I don't have to."
"Oh, come on, Jack. You flew all the way to Washington to give me some vague, cryptic answer? Just tell me what's going on. However weird you think it may be: I can handle it. However outrageous, inappropriate or ridiculous it may seem: just go for it. On my first day of being President, they told me that we've been in contact with aliens for years, and an elite team has saved this planet from some of those aliens several times. Try to beat that."
Jack inhaled long and slow. "Are you sure? Because just talking about this while I'm in the Air Force . . ."
Hayes waved his hand to dissuade his fears. "Oh, just tell me."
"Samantha Carter."
Hayes gaped. "You have got to be kidding me."
Jack shook his head slowly and swallowed hard. "No, Sir. I want to resign so I can pursue a relationship with Samantha Carter." It felt weird — to say the least — to say that to the President of the United States.
"When I first heard about the Stargate Program, Bob Kinsey tried to convince me to shut it down. One of his reasons — his last resort reasons — was that the two of you had some inappropriate relationship. Are you telling me he was right?"
"No, Sir," Jack replied quickly. "Nothing has gone on between me and Carter. Nothing at all." He paused, and dropped his voice a little. "Nothing . . . for seven and a half years. That's kind of the point."
"Really?" It was obvious that Hayes didn't know what to think. On one hand, Kinsey had told him that Jack and Carter were having an inappropriate relationship. On the other hand, Kinsey was an idiot.
"Sir, I assure you, there has been no improper behavior on either one of our parts." He thought back to the time he and Teal'c had been caught in a time loop, but that didn't really count; he had resigned then as well. "Carter fully deserved her promotion to Lieutenant Colonel."
Hayes waved his hand again. "Hammond had her up for promotion anyway. She would have gotten one sooner or later."
Jack sat quietly, looking at the President.
"Gee, Jack, this is a hell of a reason to quit the job you've got."
He shrugged. "Seven and half years, Sir. That is one hell of a reason."
Hayes thought to himself for a few more seconds. "Would you stay on at the SGC as a civilian?"
Jack nodded slowly. "Yes, Sir. Why?"
A devious smile rose to Hayes' lips. "The Senate Appropriations Committee has been pushing me for a civilian to be in charge of the SGC."
"You think they'll buy that, Sir?"
Hayes shrugged. "Probably not, but it's either you or another Air Force general." Jack nodded. "I've got a scheduled meeting with the Committee in two weeks. I'll fast-track your request for resignation so your commission is up the day after. If they go for it, you'll be a civilian in charge of the SGC; if they don't, I'll delay for resignation until we can get someone to replace you."
"I'll get a list of people who could take over."
"Alright, Jack," Hayes stood up. "I hope, for my sake, that the Appropriations Committee goes for this."
Jack stood as well and shook the President's hand. "I hope they take it, too."
Hayes smiled. "Samantha Carter?" he repeated, skeptical.
Jack couldn't help but smile at the mention of her. "Yes, Sir," he nodded.
Hayes nodded. "I knew her father." He paused, thinking back. "Stubborn son of a bitch," he laughed. "Good luck, Jack."
"Good luck with the Senate, Sir," Jack said, turning to leave. He paused at the door when Hayes spoke.
"Jack, consider a few particular regulations relaxed for two weeks or so . . ."
Jack nodded, feeling nearly giddy on the inside. "Thank you, Sir."
Jack got the details of the Senate Appropriations Committee meeting on his way out and then got to Reagan International Airport as soon as he could. He caught the earliest flight to Colorado Springs that was available.
He had waited for this for years. He had planned this for months.
He was resigning.
Regulations were relaxed.
He had to talk to Carter.
- . - . -
Jack stood outside Carter's door. He had been there for several minutes, trying to work up the courage to knock. He really thought he should do it soon before she randomly came through it for one reason or another. That would be awkward.
He finally tapped against the door a few times and waited.
Seconds later, she opened the door. "Sir!" she was more than a little surprised to see him; after all, he wasn't supposed to be in Washington until tomorrow. "Come in." She stepped aside, allowing him entrance to her home. "Can I get you something?" she asked.
He nodded, walking in. "Yeah, what ever you've got." He watched her head to the kitchen and looked around her house. He'd been there before, but it somehow felt different now. Nothing had happened between Sam and himself yet, but things had already changed.
"Take a seat," she offered as she returned with a pair of beers. She handed one to him and gestured for him to take a seat in the chair behind him. He did and she sat on the couch. "How was your trip?" she asked, pushing a coaster in his direction.
He smiled inwardly. She was a coaster person . . . wow, they were way different people. They were so different. He had a habit of tossing his bottle caps randomly over the house, and she was a coaster person.
"I'm resigning my commission," he said after a moment of silence.
"What? Why?" she gaped. It was funny; she and Hayes had the same reaction. Well, funny like when she was "driving, in my car, and I drove here," after he had had his head sucked by that Ancient Head-Sucker for the second time.
He put his beer down, not taking a drink from it, and stared at it. "I went to Washington to talk to President Hayes. I didn't just want to up and leave without giving a reason why."
Even though he paused, Carter remained silent. She didn't know what to say. It kind of surprised him; she almost always knew what to say. Sure, it had always been there between them; their careers. But he knew that she never thought that one of them would actually call it quits on whim like he just did.
"For a very long time, I've had something I needed to do. But I always pushed it aside. That was until just recently when I finally convinced myself that I couldn't put this off any longer." He met her gaze. "Someone had to make the first move, Sam."
He reached into his pocket and placed his hand on the table, covering the object from his pocket. He had gotten it months ago, even before he had spoken to Martouf. He the longest time, it had sat on top of his dresser, staring back at him every time he got a new pair of socks. Jack took a deep breath and moved his hand, uncovering the object.
Sam went slack jawed and wide eyed.
It was a ring box.
"I guess I really don't what else to say," Jack said with a small laugh, "but you always knew that I'm not very eloquent."
He thought back to when Doctor Samantha Carter came through that damned mirror they found on 223. "I know you well enough to know that you don't have a clue what to say," she had said. "But you don't have to say anything."
He stood up, preparing to leave. "This is a lot to take in really quickly. You really haven't had time to think and you probably don't know if this is what you want for your life. But I have had time to think, and I do know what I want for my life. I'll give you time to think."
He walked towards her front door, leaving his beer untouched. This was a lot of information to take in, in a very short time. He knew exactly what he was doing to her. He just resigned his commission and proposed marriage to her. He knew what he wanted. It must have scared the hell out of her.
"Jack," she said when he was only halfway down the hall. He turned to her. "I don't need time to decide," she said.
With a few rushed steps from both of them, they were mere inches from each other and they froze. They made eye contact and nothing else mattered. She tightly gripped his lapels and pulled him to her as he threw his arms around her and pressed his lips to hers in a careless, desperate, nervous fashion.
After an indeterminate amount of time, they broke.
"Whoa," Jack breathed, not loosening his grip on her.
Sam inhaled deeply and nodded.
They stood. That was all; his arms pressing her tight to him and her hands clenching his jacket.
Her eyes shifted around, suddenly extremely self-conscious. "It's not going to be like this all the time, is it?
Jack shook his head. "No, I'm sure we'll eventually get over this initial awkwardness."
She nodded. "Okay." Still gripping his lapels, she looked around a little. "What do we do now?"
He sighed, still pressing her tight to him. "Oh, I suppose we contact the Tok'Ra tomorrow and talk to your dad and then I guess we have a wedding to plan."
"And now?"
"You mean right now?" She nodded. "I don't know," he replied.
She inhaled and nodded emphatically. "Because I really think we should kiss again."
"Okay." He leaned in for another kiss, but stopped just short. She opened her eyes when she felt the distance between them. "You know I'm in love with you, right?" he asked.
She nodded again, "Yeah. Yeah, I know."
"Okay, just thought I'd get that on the table."
"Good idea." She leaned back a little, giving him a better view of her entire face. "I . . . ah, I love you, too."
He smiled. "Well . . . okay then." Allowing one hand to drift down to her hip and the other up to her neck, he kissed her again. She let her grip on him loosen and ran her hands up to cup his face.
Their second kiss was slower, cooler, less rushed, less scary. It was right.
Succumbing to the need for oxygen, they broke apart, just far enough to look into each others' eyes.
"Are you hungry?" Sam asked in a husky whisper.
Jack leaned back, getting a full view of her face, more than a little surprised. "What?"
She cleared her throat. "Dinner. I was thinking about making something when got here. Do you want something to eat?"
"First date dinner . . . sure." Jack released her and followed her into her kitchen, stopping by the coffee table and grabbing their beers. "Okay," he said as she got some chicken from the freezer and a pan from the cupboard. "What do you want me to do?"
She laughed. "I thought the only thing you could make was melted ice and burnt steak?"
"Well, unless you teach me now, it's either melted ice or burnt steak, or you're doing the cooking. Just sayin' . . ."
She laughed again. "Come here." She handed him a pair of tongs. "Flip the chicken," she instructed.
He took the tongs dutifully, "Yes, Ma'am." She turned away from him and went towards the refrigerator. "Sam," he said when she was back at the counter, cutting up vegetables. She looked up at him. He kissed her lips sweetly.
An infectious smile spread across her face and she kissed him again. "A girl could get used to this."
He responded with a simple "yeah" and turned back to the chicken he was supposed to be minding.
"So, what did the President say?" Carter asked after a few minutes.
Jack took a swig of his beer. "He said that he'd love to keep me around. Apparently, the Senate Appropriations Committee is looking for a civilian in charge anyway. They really liked Weir, but well . . . she's in another galaxy. So, Hayes has a meeting with them in thirteen days, my resignation is enacted in fourteen. We'll see if I'm around the SGC after that."
"I meant about . . . about why you resigned your commission."
Jack chuckled. "He was shocked, actually. Apparently, Kinsey tried to make him believe there were some inappropriate activities going on when Hayes first got elected. Hayes dismissed it all, so you can imagine he was a little surprised when I told him it was true, sort of."
"Does he know what's going on right now?" she gestured broadly, referring to their engagement.
Jack shrugged. "I didn't know what was going to be going on right now, so no; but I'm sure he has his suspicions."
After a brief moment of silence, Carter laughed. "How weird was that conversation?"
He nodded. "Yeah, really weird."
The ice had been broken. They finished making dinner, then sat down and enjoyed it together. Deciding what was going to happen next between the two of them. They were going to keep things to themselves until they spoke to Jacob.
After dinner, they reclined on the couch. Jack put his feet up on the coffee table and Sam leaned against him with her legs curled next to her. It was quiet. It was comfortable. It was right.
Well into the second hour of the Gilligan's Island marathon they'd been watching, but not really paying all that much attention to, Jack glanced at his watch. It was getting late; 2230. "I should go," he said, getting up.
Sam grabbed his wrist, and met his gaze.
He didn't think it was possible for those blue eyes to smolder and sparkle at the same time, but they did.
She stood. "You don't have to go," she said, her voice just above a whisper.
He took both of her hands. "I really, really, would like to take you up on that offer, but . . . We've been dating and engaged for all of . . . six hours. I know we rushed into this and that was kind of the point; but some things shouldn't be rushed into."
She smiled softly. "I think you're right."
He put on his discarded shoes and grabbed his jacket, and walked to the door with her. He leaned towards her to give her a chaste kiss, but she pulled him to her with her hands on his neck. Dropping his jacket, his hands found comfortable positions on her hips.
When she finally broke off, he exhaled deeply.
"You're right," he said, "I could get used to this."
She smiled. "Good night, Jack."
"Night, Carter." He opened the door to leave, but paused at the threshold, turning back quickly for one more kiss. "Definitely could get used to this," he said as he left.
She watched him leave from her doorway; offering him a smile and wave as he drove off. "Definitely could get used to this," he repeated to himself on his drive home.
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