Have you ever been in love?
Horrible isn't it?
It makes you so vulnerable.
It opens your chest and
it opens up your heart and
it means that someone can get inside you and
mess you up.

~Neil Gaiman~

Close enough to start a war
All that I have is on the floor
God only knows what we're fighting for
All that I say, you always say more

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables

Under haunted skies I see you
Where love is lost, your ghost is found
I braved a hundred storms to leave you
As hard as you try, no I will never be knocked down

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no
I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
Turning tables

Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
When the thunder calls for me
Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
Standing on my own two feet

I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no
I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables
Turning tables, yeah
Turning oh

~Turning Tables~
Adele

JPOV

"Did I do something wrong?"

The nasal sound that was at my left broke me out of my trance, and I looked to the girl that lay next to me. I looked a her, scrutinizing every part of her as she looked to me - her exotic eyes pleading with me for approval as she put her hand on my bare chest - her raven hair which was sprawled across her sun soaked back seemed to shine against the beams of sun that came through the open window.

My eyes blurred again as my head pounded, once again a reminder of what I had done last night - considering it was a normal Friday night and I groaned as the hangover hit me full force, every inch of my body tense and rigid as I tried to soothe my head as I tried to recall what we had obviously done last night yet the small detail that I needed to know seemed to be alluded from me.

What the fuck was her name?

Great, Jake, you can remember that she swallowed yet you can't remember her fucking name?

I sighed as I ruffled my long hair, trying to clear my vision as I looked back down to swallower, before giving her a smile - leaning down to give her a soft kiss, which tasted of vodka and, well, other stuff.

She's called swallower for a reason.

"No," I muttered as I parted with her, looking to my alarm.

9:44

13th of September, 2010

"You didn't do anything wrong, "I muttered bitterly as I got out of bed, pulling my boxers on as I rubbed my blurry eyes as I tried to not fall over.

The girl seemed to brighten as I said that and she smiled flirtatiously at me, her whole body lighting up as if she didn't consume the same amount of alcohol that I did last night. I looked at all the clothes that were strewn across the floor, and I grabbed her clothes - flicking them at her and she looked up, shock overcoming her features as her eyebrows furrowed, and her lips puckered as if she wanted to say something yet her tongue was tied.

"Baby, I- I- are you sure I didn't do something wrong?" She asked as she scrambled onto her knees, going to where I stood beside the bed and she put her hands on my torso. "Did I bite you? I mean, I can do better, I promise."

I groaned, closing my eyes as I pinched the bridge of my nose. "Can you just leave?"

And then I felt her hands grasping me.

Ah, little Jacob's awake.

She smiled up at me, her eyes wide; almost pleading. "Baby, get hard for me."

Shit, are those fake nails?

"Can you just get the fuck out?" I seethed, my fists clenching as I felt myself start shaking and with wide eyes, she quickly grabbed her clothes - pulling them over her bare body as she all but sprinted out the door and into the living room of the house.

"Hello, would you like some- oh, I can see your lady bits." That was the last thing I heard before I slammed the door, Dad's voice ringing through my ears.

I rubbed my hand over my face as I breathed in a deep breath, my fists clenched. Today was the 13th of September - it was her birthday. It had been four years, four fucking years, and nothing had changed in the amount of time that I had not seen her, not spoken to her, not even stood within a ten mile radius of her.

I had run away, the first thing that had come to my mind after Bella had agreed to marry that bloodsucking leech. Yet still, in a different country, I still saw her face at every interval - at every moment I was conscious, her heart shaped, doe-eyed orbs had consumed every thought that I had, every move I made. It was like her face had permanently invaded my mind, and was determined to keep itself lodged within it for as long as it possibly could. Of course it didn't help when I saw her face in the mind of each and every one of my pack members, all of whom could not hide her from me - could not keep her from my thoughts.

I had thought when I had gotten away from La Push, away from her, that it would allow me to think, allow me time to fall out of love with her. When I had left, I had even thought of trying to do the one thing that I had thought was impossible; I had tried to imprint. I just wanted to forget about her, forget about the rejection that made my stomach churn and produced vile that slithered its way up my throat every time I thought about her as a red eyed bloodsucking leech that would prey on those that were unsuspecting, and innocent.

Anger bubbled through me as her face violently flashed through my mind, yet her skin wasn't the glowing ivory in which so reminded me of snow - but it was void of all life, almost reminiscent of a corpse. Her face was evened out of all it's imperfections, and her eyes which swirled with a brown that I had thought so perfect were now a deathly, disgusting scarlet which only served of evidence of her unnatural evil.

I couldn't help myself.

I punched a wall.

I had to get outside.

Running through the front door, I made it to the forest in mere seconds as I ripped out of my shorts - my whole body ripping apart as my bones, muscles and skin adapted to my other body. My whole body shook as I felt the anger coarse through my veins, accompanied by my blood, and I threw my head back - the noise that came from my mouth resembling a chocked howl.

Ah, did you take a trip to China Town last night, Jake?

I closed my eyes, trying to block out the rough voice of Leah Clearwater.

What? She asked, Can't take a fucking joke?

Just piss of Leah, I growled as I ran through the forest, my paws bounding against the wet ground as the trees passed me; making a blur of green and brown pass my peripheral vision. At Leah's voice, my mind went back to the girl from last night - and I heard Leah's laughter echo through my head, and ring through my ears; the sound making my whole body vibrate with anger.

Oh, stop being such a drama Queen, She said, laughter still evident in her voice.

I narrowed my eyes. That's rich coming from you.

Silence ensued, and I knew I had hit a nerve as flashes of Leah's purple bridesmaids dress and the image of a laughing Sam and Emily swirled through the mind of my pack mate.

Fuck off, Jake.

I knew she had phased out of it again when I heard the silence bounce through my head, and I felt a growl rip through my lips as I ran through the forest, my head thrashing as I tried to control myself enough to phase back.

It had been four years.

The sentence ran through my mind again, and I felt my whole body go rigid before it slumped on the ground - exhausted from everything. All I wanted was to forget her - forget how she blushed, and how she always seemed to have trouble getting out her sentences from her perfect lips. I didn't want to love her anymore; I had had enough of loving her, of wishing that I was the one that she had picked.

I was just … tired.

Phasing, I jogged back to the house - going to the tree that I had stashed extra shorts in, and I quickly pulled them over everything. I looked back to the house that I had been raised, before deciding that I didn't want to see Dad today - I didn't want to see the constant pity that seemed to suffocate everything between us and I looked down to the beach where I could hear the waves crashing, almost beckoning me.

I made a step to go down there, before I felt my stomach growl almost as loud as I had when I was a wolf.

Emily's it is.

Bounding through the door, the smell of eggs and bacon instantly hit me and I felt spit rush through my mouth. Emily had already put the toast, eggs and bacon on the table as everyone else started to gather around the table - to the joy of Emily whom seemed like she had just had a great orgasm.

Great thought, Jake, Sam's going to love that later.

"Oi, Jake - how was the Chinese last night!"

The table erupted in laughter as I sat down, shoving Seth who had a huge grin on his face and I ruffled my hair, exasperated as I tried not to punch someone. "Aw, C'mon Jake - no need to be a pussy."

I almost growled as I grabbed the bacon, shoving it onto my plate as I felt a hand on my back. "Boys, leave Jacob alone."

Even though the action was nice enough, like a caring mother, I quickly shrugged her hand off for the tone that she had said those four words with had alerted everyone at the table to what day it was. Instant silence came over the table, the only sound being food being wolfed down. I felt another hand on my back, patting it like it was meant to comfort me and soothe the thing that had been haunting me for the past four years.

"You right, mate?" Embry asked, and I narrowed my eyes.

"Would you all just fuck off," I growled into my food, not bothering looking up because I all knew they would be giving me the same look.

Silence seemed to follow before the table steadily came back into conversation, mostly about stupid little things like 'how's the weather today', well, Embry, it's fucking raining - like usual. Wow, what a shock that La Push was still the rain soaked town it had always been, not really much of a surprise that still, after hundreds of years of suffering through the same weather that it would continue to uphold it's name as the rainiest town in the US.

"So, how was last night?"

I turned to Seth, who was still grinning like an idiot and I shoved him - rolling my eyes. "She was a swallower."

Sam shook his head. "Not at the table, Jake."

"Oh, C'mon Sam - we just want to hear how Jake ended up fucking Lucy Lui here!"

The sound of a hand colliding with the back of a head echoed through the house, followed by my pack members laughter that bounded through the room - most of their voices muffled as the food that was in their mouth seemed to act as a sound barrier. I rolled my eyes at my friends - shovelling more food onto my plate. "So, Em, when is your brother coming over?"

"Tonight," She said, a bright smile overcoming her scarred features and you would think that the Queen would be coming over, not her brother.

Emily's brother hadn't seen Emily in barely four years, so of course when ever he came down to La Push it was an occasion that Emily made such a fuss about. She had never really talked about why he avoided his family, but it seemed whenever he was mentioned Sam had to go outside and punch a tree.

Safe to say, Emily's brother must be a bit of a fuck head.

Emily came back over to the table, putting down the blue berry muffins that seemed to overflow from the plate and Sam got up fro her, letting her sit on his chair and she smiled up at him before she looked back at everyone else at the table - a smile gone from her face as if she was warning children about not touching something. "Now, boys, my brother is bringing his fiancé over tonight and I expect all of you to be here if you want food for the next month but if any of you do anything to scare her off, there will be no food for a month. And I mean it."

There was sounds of protests all throughout the table, and Seth turned to her - his mouth full to the brim with bacon and egg while he threw his hands up into the air, his whole face stretching in outrage. "Why? What do you think we're going to do; imprint on her?"

Emily narrowed her eyes. "Let's hope not."

Sam put his hand on Emily's shoulder, and I felt my eyes narrow slightly as I wondered how they could let themselves be controlled by imprinting. Even the word in my mouth gave me a bad taste, like I was tasting Dad's cooking, and I wondered how they could even be okay with the fact they were being controlled by something that binded them together in the most unnatural way - a way that went against their will and made them love each other. If it weren't for imprinting, Sam would probably be marrying Leah and it would save her from being a pain in all of our asses for the rest of eternity.

Fucking Imprinting.

Emily stood back up, and Sam slid his arms around her waist and she seemed to melt into his whole body - as if she couldn't stand up straight. As soon as she leant against his chest, it was like she was high she smiled so bright that it seemed impossible to break her from the trance that's eh seemed to be in. Even Sam seemed to have an expression so euphoric on his face that it made me want to empty my stomach all over the breakfast table, and in extension Seth, because, well, he was just pissing me off.

"Where's Quil?" I asked, turning to Embry and he shrugged.

"Probably playing barbies with Claire," He snickered, and Emily backhanded him. "What! That's all he fucking does!"

Emily smiled as she started grabbing the plates. "He's down the beach with Collin, and Brady."

I stood up. "I'm off then,"

Emily's whole face softened, and she nodded - setting the plates down and she bit her lip. "Well, are you going to come tonight, Jake?"

I shrugged. "Dunno'."

She nodded, and she picked the plates up before going back into the kitchen and I turned to the door - jogging down the porch steps before I heard someone close the door behind me. "Oi, Jake!"

Great.

Just what I needed.

A lecture.

"What Sam?" I muttered, my voice filled to the brim with venom as we walked along the rough dirt drive and onto the well ridden road.

Over the last two years that I had been back home, it seemed that at every opportunity he got, Sam was breathing down my neck; telling me to move only or reprimanding me like I was a child. And every time I had to remind him that he didn't need to stand in for my father, because I already had a very much alive and talking Dad that seemed to be able to lecture me just fine.

I gritted my teeth as I tried to control myself - as I tried not to let my clenched fists come out and punch him. I usually wouldn't really care if I punched him, but the last time that we had a 'friendly discussion', as Sam liked to call it, I had dislocated his jaw when I had punched him and I didn't get fed by Emily for a week. In all honesty, I had wanted him to get knocked out just so he would stop talking but a dislocated jaw did the job just fine.

I just wish it stayed that way.

Sam let out a huge breath which resembled a sigh, and I rolled my eyes as I wondered how - when he gets the balls to actually get Emily pregnant - his children were going to be able to deal with a father like Sam Uley, a controlling dick head who had something lodged so far up his ass that it seemed that every time he talked, he would look down at you like you were a child that had just fucked up his car. I know that if I was his son, Sam would one day magically end up floating upside down in a river.

"Listen, Jake, Em would really like you to come tonight." He said as we walked, and I looked to him.

"I said I don't know, Sam," I hissed. "Did you ever think that maybe I'm doing something tonight?"

He scoffed. "What? Do you have an appointment to have your head in between some sluts legs?"

I laughed humourlessly, turning to him as we walked along the side of the road. "Yeah - you guessed right. I can't cancel."

"Fuck off, Jake," Sam snarled, stopping in front of me as he blocked my way. "Jake, Emily's really trying here - her brother doesn't talk to her, and he's agreed to come to our wedding. Em just needs friendly faces here tonight, okay? It's the first time she's seeing him in five years, so you are going to be there. Do you understand me?"

As I realised what tone he was saying those words with, I felt my whole body go rigid - he wasn't just asking me to go tonight, he was ordering me to go tonight; I had no choice in the matter. I wouldn't say that I was shocked that Sam used the tone - more like I was so angry that I wanted to put his body in the ground.

I pushed past him, not wanting to look at him anymore. "Jake! DO NOT WALK AWAY FROM ME!"

I turned around, my eyes flaring as I stiffly walked back up to him. "You do know who your speaking to, don't you Sam? You are not in control of me and you know your not."

I felt my whole body shake as I turned back around, trying to calm myself down before I exploded into a wolf. Wouldn't that be great, huh? Walking down the main street of the Rez and BANG! There's a giant wolf in the middle of the road.

That would go down so well with animal control.

I could hear Sam following me as the beach came into sight, as did the three giant men that I immediately recognised. I almost laughed at that thought; as if I wouldn't be ale to recognise those that were in my own pack? I mean, they're not exactly hard to notice.

My eyes narrowed as I saw Quil walking after a tiny woman, and a little girl with bright yellow floaties that were attached to her biceps. The little girl seemed to reject the woman, pushing her away as she thrashed against the woman's hold - screams and shouts coming from her mouth as she begged for her 'Quilly'. I didn't exactly need to hear those words come out of her mouth to know who the little girl was, I mean, she had practically been raised in the pack, by the pack; we were all her Uncles.

And then Quil knocked the woman out.

Ah, fuck.

"QUIL!" I heard bellow from Sam's mouth as he jogged past me to make it to where Quil had knocked the girl out, and I couldn't help but laugh at how pathetic Quil looked - his face contorted in horror as he held the girl in his arms like limp doll.

Shit, this was priceless.

I stood next to Brady and Collin as Quil freaked out, muttering something about Claire's Aunt while Claire sort of poked the woman that had tried to abduct her from Quils grasp. Brady and Collin were losing it with laughter as they looked to Quil, who was kind of having a bit of nervous breakdown and I laughed as Quil seemed to be pulling his hair from his scalp as he held the unconscious girl. "Dude, what the fuck did you do?"

Quil looked to me, his whole face panicked. "I-I didn't mean to hit her she kind of just walked into my fist."

That caused Brady and Collin to laugh more.

Sam shot them a look as he gently laid the girl down on the grass just above the beach. "Jake, come here."

"What?" I hissed, my eyes narrowing. "This isn't my problem! Quil's the one that fucking knocked her out!"

"What's her name?" Sam asked Quil, and Quil shrugged - looking to Claire who seemed to be more fascinated by a crow then her unconscious Aunt.

"Claire-Bear, what's her name?" Quil asked desperately, his eyes wide as he tried to get his imprint to say her name.

Claire popped her lips together. "That's Aunt Rose."

Sam looked back over to her as he tried to wake her. "Rose? Rose, can you hear me? Shit, Em is going to be fucking pissed." Sam turned to Quil, throwing his hands up. "Quil, why the fuck would you knock her out! Are you fucking insane!"

Quil looked like he was going to start rocking like a lunatic at any moment, and I was actually worried for his sanity - actually, I was kind of worried about his hair because he seemed like he was having fun ripping it out.

He's going to be a bald man before the end of the day.

I can't imagine what he's going to be like when Claire starts to go through puberty.

I looked over the girl, and I nodded appreciatively; she wasn't too bad. Of course, she was knocked out so I'm sure she'd look better when she didn't have a huge bruise brewing on her forehead and her whole left side of the face was blowing up like Jane Jackson after summer break.

I'm serious, that girl put on 100 pounds in a three months.

"Guys, she's waking up!"

She groaned, her hand coming up to her head as her eyes fluttered - a small noise coming from her mouth. "Oh,"

"Rose?" Sam asked, and she nodded. "Can you open your eyes for me?"

And then, she ever so slowly opened her eyes.

And I was gone.

Heres another chapter for you all,

Like I said, I would upload another chapter in 5-10 minutes and here it is.

PLEASE, PLEASE READ!

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW