*~MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HARUKA I FINALLY UPDATED~*

ENVISAGE

01

Konoha I

Summary: Envisage: to form a mental image of; visualize; contemplate. Konoha dreams he is someone else.

A/N: Wow. I am so very, very glad you guys like this. :3 After seeing all the follows and favorites, as well as reviews, that I got, it lifted my bad mood a lot. My readers mean the world to me and are often what keep me going when I have writer's block. I was a little hesitant to upload this since I never post my smut online for others to read and I've never written smut with plot. It'll be nice to see wear this goes.

Sorry that this is so late. My schedule got crazy hectic and things happened (basketball, concussion, more basketball) but right now basketball is done and all I have is school, so updates should come faster and more often. Until then, enjoy this wonderfully boring chapter with a dash of implied(?) smut.

*~Special thanks to xeternaldreams, roccon, pika09, YamiHikari93, Spazzehbat, Ratty4949, PCheshire, Erika Karisawa's New Sidekick, bluefang62, baka-nyan4, ScarletBloomSword, Ephemeral Sanity, Leia-Kuroia, Aliku, EchoInWonderland, MikizukiFujisawa, LightDarkandChaos, Unknown Being, Souzei, iiGato, JuniorrO, Light Fragrance, sparcklecake, hanafurawa, spring, and Guest for the support on this story.~*

The plan I have for this story has already gotten bigger, so I'll give you guys a heads up on the outline of it. It's going to be divided into at least three different sections, each scattered. Konoha, Kuroha, Haruka. Konoha=Present. Connected. Kuroha=Future. Not Connected. Haruka=Past. Connected.(omg now i want to write a cracky christmas carol AU)You'll be able to tell which section is which easy enough I think. There will also be a few 'special' parts sprinkled within the story, containing different characters' POVs.

His head is a mess, dazed and jumbled with a thousand different thoughts. Konoha can't distinguish one from the next, and when he attempts to, he's cursed with a splitting headache. His shaking hands reach up, clutching at the sides of his head, as if to relieve himself of the pain. He slows his breathing and his heart rate begins to calm, along with the burn in his mind.

That dream had just been a nightmare. Nothing more than a silly delusion. It's not going to happen. There's no way, because Konoha isn't that kind of person. He will never hurt someone, least of all Shintaro. So then why...?

Konoha's normally pale cheeks flush as he takes note of the proud erection between his thighs. The android is disgusted. He'd actually been turned on by something so shameful. He shifts around on his bed a bit, ready to make a quick exit for the bathroom where he can safely relieve himself, hoping not to wake the occupant beside him. In response to his movements, an arm wraps itself around Konoha, pulling him closer until his body is pressed against his nighttime visitor's.

If it was any other night than tonight, if Konoha hadn't just woken up from a weird dream starring both Shintaro and a darker him, if he didn't have an obvious erection, then Konoha would gladly roll over and return Shintaro's embrace.

There is a ritual that Shintaro and Konoha have for when they have wake up in the middle of the night, scared out of their minds. More often than not, Shintaro will come to Konoha's room. There are little to no electronics there, as Konoha never had many belongings in the first place, and so there's no way Ene can disturb the pair. They will hold each other, their bodies fitting together like pieces of something once whole, but now broken. Konoha falls asleep to the sound of Shintaro's heartbeat. Hands interlock; they cling tightly and don't split apart until morning. Their fingers are stiff as a result, but it is worth it. Because the closer to Shintaro, the safer Konoha feels.

But tonight, Konoha isn't as scared as usual. Rather...he's a little curious. In all his nightmares, never before had he touched Shintaro in that kind of way. It was usually a pair of scissors to the throat for the younger man. Nothing remotely sexual about that, right?

Shintaro noses the space between Konoha's shoulder blades and whispers, "You had a bad dream again, didn't you?"

"No," Konoha lies. He's never been good at deceiving people. He's no Kano, after all. Even someone as emotionally stunted as Shintaro should pick up on the mistruth.

And he does. Sort of.

Konoha can feel Shintaro smile sadly against his back, and his arms tighten around his stomach. "It's okay," the dark-haired man murmurs, "I get it."

Shintaro thinks Konoha doesn't want to talk about his nightmare, so he's about ready to start their nightly cuddle session. That's exactly what Konoha can't deal with right now.

He turns to push the other away forcefully, something he regrets almost as soon as he does it. Konoha sees the shock and hurt in Shintaro's face, and he can feel his own heart constrict painfully in response. He forces himself to look away, sitting up and positioning himself so Shintaro can't catch sight of his problem.

"Sorry," Konoha begins, fumbling for the right words to say. "I just...got to go pee."

He leaves before Shintaro can respond, making a beeline out into the hall, where he then heads into the bathroom. Konoha shuts the door as gently as possible, acutely aware of the other occupants of the house sleeping. He locks it and can't get rid of the nagging feeling that Shintaro will somehow know what he's about to do. His need to relieve himself, however, outweighs whatever reservations Konoha has left.

He pushes down his dark green pajama shorts, sitting on the toilet and splaying his legs wide. Konoha doesn't usually wear boxers when he sleeps, and so his lower half is exposed to the chill of night. He shivers and makes to move his hands downwards, to touch and 'warm', but he comes to the sudden realization that he's unsure of what to do. Konoha has jerked off before, yes, but he's always done it while watching a dirty movie. He can never really bring himself to conjure up any fantasies of his own, as he feels too embarrassed. Granted, it's not like Konoha just has porn DVDs lying around his room. He has little sexual libido for someone his age.

The only reason he's ever even watched a porno is because Kano will occasionally sneak the videos inside his room with a wink and some annoying comment about 'helping the less fortunate'.

Konoha tries to think of them now as he sits on the toilet, hands cautiously moving down to jerk himself off. His movements are timid and slow, and Konoha imagines it's someone else's hand.

Warm and pale, slender fingers run up his length, and Konoha can hear the other asking him questions in a hurried, hushed tone. Things like: Does it feel good? Do you like it? Am I doing this right?

Konoha feels the embarrassment radiating off of his partner, the tell-tale sign of someone who's not used to doing this kind of thing. He kisses them and tries to assure them that, yes, this is alright.

It's weird. The other doesn't have any breasts. Konoha looks up to see his partner is-

Konoha's mind comes to a screeching halt, movements stilling.

It takes a good few minutes to process that he's just tried to use Shintaro as wanking material, and another few to push down the feelings of guilt and continue.

Needless to say, Konoha comes out of the bathroom satisfied. That satisfaction is crushed into tiny pieces when he finally arrives back at his room, realizing he has to look at Shintaro and try not to have inappropriate thoughts. Konoha makes little sound when he opens his bedroom door, hoping he won't wake up Shintaro.

But Shintaro is waiting for him, awake already, sitting on his bed and swinging his own feet back and forth as if in a feeble attempt to amuse himself. It seems like he's been sitting there since Konoha left, and the thought sends a spike of pleasure up Konoha's spine.

As Konoha steps into the room, the floorboards creak, and Shintaro's head whips up, fixing Konoha with a look of annoyance.

"Took you long enough," Shintaro mutters, flopping himself back onto the bed and swinging his legs over. He pats the empty space beside him.

Konoha stares.

"What?" Shintaro snarls. "Afraid I'll try and comfort you again?"

So he was still sore about that.

"Ah, no. I just-well, like I said-see, I had to go pee and-," Konoha tries to explain. He's not one who has ever been good at finding the right words.

"Whatever," Shintaro interrupts him, rolling over and turning his back on the android.

Konoha slips in beside him, pulling the triceratops bedsheets up to his chin. If Shintaro was really that mad, he would've left and gone back to his own room.

Shintaro's stiff shoulders relax once he feels the added weight to the bed, but there's still a tense silence between the two. Konoha wonders what he should say to break it. He wants to try and apologize, since he knows Shintaro deserves that at the least, but he doesn't know how he should start. The android doesn't need to say anything, though, as Shintaro beats him to it.

"You know," the young man begins quietly, rolling over and propping his head up with his arm, "I could've helped you with that."

"W-what?" Konoha splutters, eyes darting to stare anywhere except Shintaro's scowling face. His mind instantly provides him with an image of Shintaro down on his knees, sucking him off with a wet, warm mouth and hooded brown eyes like molten chocolate.

No. Konoha shakes the thought away. Shintaro couldn't be talking about that. There was no way.

"Your little problem," the other stresses, making what Konoha's mind registers as an obscene gesture. "It probably would've been over with quicker if you let me help you."

Heat rises to Konoha's cheeks. He decides to try and act dumb. "Really? Wow. Uh, I guess so."

"No need to sound so happy," Shintaro mutters darkly. "I just thought I'd offer so you'd finish faster next time. I mean, that's what the guys in Mary's manga do."

Oh. Oh. Konoha has read plenty of 'Mary's manga' and he knows exactly what Shintaro is talking about now.

Happiness explodes in his chest. He briefly wonders if he's dreaming, because why would Shintaro-surly, proud Shintaro-ever admit that he was willing to do that sort of stuff? Konoha reaches over to grab Shintaro's hand, clasping it in his own firmly. "Yeah. I'd like that," he replies softly.

The tips of Shintaro's ears turn red, and Konoha smiles, thinking he's adorable. They fall asleep like usual, curled around each other. This time Konoha doesn't have any nightmares.

Konoha wakes up to the banging of pots and pans and a whole lot of yelling. His hand runs over the empty space beside him, finding it cold, and he opens one bleary eye. Shintaro must already be awake, then, and-from the sound of it-is part of the commotion most definitely going on in the kitchen.

The android doesn't bother changing out of his pajamas just yet. Instead, he makes his way out to where the source of the noise is, wincing as the sun seems to get brighter once he leaves his room.

The walls of the gang's newfound house are old and worn, but it is something that's been bequeathed to them by Kido, Kano, and Seto's former foster parents. As a result, it has the definite atmosphere of a true home. Most of them live here, and Konoha can remember Shintaro talking about how if it wasn't for his mom, he and Momo would be moved in with the others for good. The only other member who doesn't really live at the house is Hibiya. It's because they have other families that they don't stay, and Konoha wonders if he ever had the kind of family that they do, one with parents.

Oh, well. Thinking too much is tiresome. Konoha walks into the kitchen with a yawn, taking in the scene.

"How much pain will you cause before you're finally satisfied?" Shintaro screeches, jabbing an accusatory finger at Momo. He holds a frying pan in front of him, one decorated in sticky, orange splotches. Momo wields a bowl and spatula covered in the same orange substance, and she growls menacingly at her brother.

"Shut up!" the idol snarls. "Leader is having a very important discussion with Mary so someone else had to make breakfast. I didn't see you waking up this morning to fix it, now, did I?"

"If I had," Shintaro puffs his chest out, "there's no way I could've screwed up."

It's then that Momo finally decides she's had enough of Shintaro's shit and promptly throws the spatula at him. Her brother, however, easily lifts the frying pan to swat it away like a baseball player hitting a home run.

Unfortunately for Hibiya, the spatula flies towards him to his place at the breakfast bar and ends up smacking him right in the face. The boy makes a wounded, mewling sound. Kano roars with laughter, leaning against the refrigerator for support. Hibiya's bottom lip trembles and he clutches at his newly orange nose. Seto, who lately seemed to be sticking to Hibiya's side as if he were glued to him, immediately bends down to fuss over the younger boy, cooing and cupping his cheeks.

"Beat Master up, Momo! Show no mercy!" Ene's voice rang from Shintaro's cellphone, which poked up out of his pants' pocket.

"Shut up, Ene!" Shintaro wails. "You always take her side!"

"Maybe it's because I'm always right!" Momo hollers back, narrowing her eyes at her brother. She tosses the bowl in his direction, and Shintaro isn't quick enough to block this one. It hits him in the stomach, orange splattering his black t-shirt and he crumples, wheezing.

Konoha feels an itch telling him to help so he strides over.

"Here," Konoha says and offers his hand to Shintaro. "Let me help you up."

Shintaro's eyes dim when he looks up at Konoha; there's this faraway look in them.

Konoha tilts his head to the side, puzzled, and wonders where the young man is. If he's remembering something or daydreaming.

"Shintaro," the android murmurs, and said man snaps out of it.

"Ah, sorry 'bout that," Shintaro mutters. He takes Konoha's hand into his own.

Just as Konoha is helping Shintaro back to his feet, the loud clearing of a throat interrupts the commotion, silencing the entire room. Konoha glances over to see Kido standing in the entrance to the kitchen with Mary trembling behind her.

Kido's eyes are blank, her shoulders tense as she addresses them. "Clean yourselves up. We need to make a trip to the library. Now."

A/N: lol i skimmed over the konoha-jerking-off part b/c it was painful for me to write considering i don't have a penis. this whole story is painful wat am i talking about.

poor sexually awkward konoha i feel for u man. only tapping it in ur dreams. and shintaro don't read mary's manga wat r u doing

i'm a serious writer can't u tell.

Anyways, again, sorry for the long wait. I'd be surprised if anyone was even still interested in reading this. I really don't like this chapter since it's just kind of sucky filler leading up to stuff but-hey, it needed to be done. And it took. for. fucking. ever.

oh, and other pairings have been decided. KidoMomo and SetoHibi ftw holla

probably also KanoMary because that's how i roll