Chapter 2.

In the end, their talk hadn't turned out as expected.
Knowing about the feelings they had for each other was one thing, but actually putting words to them was a different story entirely, so while Sam was in the shower, they just avoided looking at each other and kept their mouths shut. Neither of them was ready to break the awkward silence, and when they heard Sam turning off the water, Cas got up and just disappeared in a flutter of wings. Dean would've been seriously unhappy about this, he actually had a curse or two on his lips, just waiting to spill out, but instead of just expressing his frustration, he gasped in surprise.

"Dude, what's the matter? You look like you just saw a ghost."

Sam was standing in the doorframe, wearing a fresh set of levis und an old, worn-out shirt that was damp at the shoulders where it came in contact with his wet hair. Steam was swirling out of the bathroom, indicating that the younger Winchester must've used up most of them hot water. Dean didn't mind though, not after seeing how badly his little brother was hurt by the witch. Cas had done his best to heal him, but he wasn't as powerful as he used to be. Besides, at the moment Dean was way too occupied with staring at the empty space where moments before the Angel had stood.

"I've seen ghosts before, Sammy, but what I saw just now was a first."

Blinking a few times, he turned to his brother, who was now busy drying his hair with one of those old as fuck towels that were more grey than white.

"Mind filling me in? Something Cas did?"

"Uh…in a way, yeah. Man, I can hardly believe it myself but…his wings. I just saw his goddamn wings. No shadows, but proper filling-out-the-damn-motel-room-huge wings."

Sam stared at him, disbelieving with a frown on his face that said "don't you dare shitting me", and Dean couldn't even blame him for his skepticism. He wouldn't have just believed it this easily either.

"You sure about that, Dean? Wasn't there something about only special people being able to see an Angel's true form?"

"I'm telling you, man, I'm 100% positive I saw his wings. I mean, it was only for a second but you can't help noticing two huge, black wings when they just suddenly appear in the room. He looked all normal otherwise, no burning-out-your-eyes true form or something. Just Cas with wings."

"Today's one hell of a weird day."

Dean couldn't agree more with his brother. Sighing, he ran a hand through his short hair, still trying to come to terms with everything that had happened. It was already dark outside and their room was only illuminated by a bare light bulb and the streetlights. The motel they stayed in was of the particularly shabby kind, but it worked for the brothers and they would leave on the next day anyway. The older of the brothers got out two bottles of warm beer from his duffle bag, tossing one to Sam who caught it skillfully with his left hand and used one of the drawer's edges to open it. Dean had to admit it was a pretty cool move for his pretty little princess of a brother. He opened his own bottle then, the normal way because he wasn't in the mood for showing off, but the first gulp wasn't providing him with the distinctive satisfaction cold beer gave you after a long, hard day.

"Shit's fucking disgusting"

"Better than nothing. Tomorrow we can get proper beer."

They decided to wind up the evening with their warm beers and watching TV. There was some old Bruce Willis action flick on, which was nothing remarkable but good enough for distraction. Sam asked what happened while he was out, but Dean didn't really feel in the mood for talking and besides, he had no words to explain what he and Cas experienced anyway. He promised to explain everything tomorrow, hoping he might be able to sort out his thoughts by then, and Sam, for once, was satisfied with the answer he got and didn't pry any further. In moments like this one, Dean was truly happy to have a brother like Sam - someone who understood him on this very elementary level, knowing always when to give him his time and when to get on his nerves instead. He smiled a little to himself then, put down the empty bottle and declared he'd go to sleep now. It was well after midnight after all and he had a long drive before him. Throwing himself face-down on the bed, Dean hoped he'd just fall asleep. He figured answers to all of his current problems would come in his dreams, but his mind apparently wasn't ready to shut down for the night. The heat was bothering him too. It was summer and the motel room didn't have AC. Opening the window wouldn't do any good either since it was even hotter outside than in here. All in all, it seemed to the older Winchester like this night just really wanted to fuck with him. He hadn't been able to sort things out with Cas, he was running away from his own – Screw that!

He stopped his trail of thoughts then. He just wasn't ready for the feelings-shit and both Sammy and the goddamn Angel would just have to deal with it. He couldn't change who he was and Dean Winchester just didn't do this chick flick crap. What he did was hunting and killing – that's what he was always good at, and he'd continue doing precisely this. There was no need for complicating things, no need to fix something that was working, and things with Cas were working just fine. They each went their separate ways and only got together when they needed help. It was okay like that. Sure, Dean couldn't deny that he had thought about the Angel in a very unprofessional way, but really, a guy like him was better off without getting involved with a millennia-old supernatural creature. In the end, it would only lead to pain, so there was really no need for changing anything about their relationship.
With these thoughts on his mind, Dean was finally able to sleep.

Things weren't ideal, they'd never be, but he hoped Cas would understand. He'd seen his mind after all, so if anyone would understand, it would be him.