This chapter was beta-ed by the wonderful JaliceAZ
-X-
"You couldn't disappoint me, Thane. Not even now."
Gods, those eyes. They were almost as large and round as his own, so filled with misery and terror. She would never admit it, his Siha, trying to be strong for his own sake. A cough tore through him, piercing him with a pain equivalent to that of the blade that had placed him in this bed.
The sound of his agony caused both his son and his love to flinch.
How could he do this to them? It wasn't a conscious decision. Thane did not want to abandon them when they needed him most. If the gods had placed the decision in his hands, he would have chosen life. He would have chosen Siha. But the tides were summoning him. The shores across a not so distant sea were beckoning.
His chest compressed. Thane could not breathe. A fit of coughing stole what little oxygen his lungs could retain. It was pain without parallel. His chest was on fire and his limbs sore, feeling as though they had all been broken. Thane was helpless to his fate, weak and defenseless against what was to come. This was not the death that he would have chosen for himself, though he could not bring himself to regret the events that had preceded his current demise. His son had been returned to him. Thane had been miraculously awarded the love of an incomparable woman. It was better than he deserved.
He wanted to reach out to her then, to trace her beautiful cheekbones, the line of her jaw, the plump of her lips. But Thane's limbs were heavy. His mind growing slower. The sound of crashing waves and churning oceans grew louder. No longer was it a distant din. It was rapidly growing nearer to him than the woman he loved and the son only just restored his life. There was one more thing to be done. Just one last prayer to be made before the seas washed him elsewhere.
"Guide this one, Kalahira, and she will be a companion to you as she was to me."
Goddess, protect her in his stead. Thane didn't have sufficient strength even to draw his next breath.
A gasp ripped him out of the darkness. His lungs roared a complaint against such deliberate abuse. It was not the same pain he remembered. The discomfort clustered in his chest felt as if it had just been the target of a charging varren. Thane's body was heavy with drowsiness. His limbs were immobile, distant, deadweight. There was a thick fog surrounding him, cascading confusion down upon him like the heavy rains of Kahje.
Voices fluttered somewhere beyond the reach of his awareness. The quick and pitchy sound of them told the assassin that they were salarian. Was he across the sea? Were these salarians dead as well?
"Brain activity suggests that the subject is aware," one of the voices was close enough for him to hear without straining his malfunctioning senses. The voice was filled with concern, surprise, and excitement, emotions coloring his tone like the hues of the hanar.
Subject, a scientific term that he hadn't expected to encounter in the afterlife. There was no way . . .
Another salarian responded to his colleague's observation, the shades of his tone a mirror of the first horned amphibian. "Give him another dose of sedatives. We have more tests to run."
No. Thane didn't need sedatives. If the gods had indeed felt inclined to lengthen his life then he didn't need more tests to be run. Thane needed to find Shepard. He needed to find his son. They would have mourned him. He would have made them suffer a needless pain. He needed . . . he had to . . . consciousness was fading fast. Thane was thrown into a memory as he was forced into slumber.
Blood red, that was the shade that best described the color of her hair. The shining strands of crimson were haphazardly combed aside as she pulled on her helmet. Jade irises landed on him for a moment, inspecting him for something he did not know. Those impossibly green eyes were stolen up by the turian standing before her.
"Cleaning up Cerberus' mess again," observed Garrus as he inspected his rifle another time. Mandibles twitching into a smirk, he continued, "Just like old times."
A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth. Shepard casually leaned back, ignoring the slight tremble of the hammerhead fighting against some turbulence. "They never learn, do they?"
A Cerberus base needed to be contained. An experiment had gone awry and it appeared only Commander Shepard had the skills necessary to properly manage the situation. Admittedly, Thane was curious to see the woman in action once again. He had heard stories, everyone had. The illustrious Commander Shepard was a force to be reckoned with. He had seen what she was capable of first hand.
The Dantius towers had been a race to the top. Upon Shepard's arrival he had been pressed to beat the hurricane of a woman to the target. But now he would be at her side, an extension of her will. He would learn more about how she fought, how she thought, who she was.
Thane was surprised at his carefully suppressed ardor for this opportunity. It betrayed a desire -a need- to know this woman.
Double checking all of her equipment, she addressed her team like the true authority her title suggested, "Lord knows what Cerberus is doing down there. But if I know Cerberus, it's nothing that I'd approve of. Save anyone that can be saved, kill anything that can't."
The hammerhead touched down and they disembarked. As soon as his feet touched the ground, Thane was filled with unease. When buildings are filled with people it can be felt, the souls within giving the life to the structure. But the facility they approached was as dead as Nassana Dantius.
"Shepard," his voice reached out to her, nothing pleasant awaited them ahead.
The woman at point nodded in agreement. "I feel it," she muttered.
A male voice filled their communicators as they closed in on the front doors. "Thank God you came! My name is Dr. Gavin Archer. The situation is urgent – we're facing a catastrophic VI breakout. I'll explain the details later, but you must retract the transmission dish. The controls aren't far from your position. You have to hurry!"
He left them with that, allowing silence to accompany them as they entered the Cerberus facility. As soon as the doors shut behind them, they were greeted by death. Bodies were strewn about. Blood splattered across walls and congealing in pools the shade of Shepard's hair. It was a massacre.
"I knew I wouldn't like this," grumbled Shepard. Displeasure swam in the greens of her eyes. Anger tugged at her eyebrows.
Garrus nodded his agreement, "With so many projects that end like this, it's a wonder that anyone would invest in Cerberus."
Turning away from an open-eyed body, she commanded, "Move out," and led them in to the mess that surely awaited them.
They made their way to the control room without incident, though that meant very little when compared to the level of destruction surrounding them. Cautiously, Shepard approached the console. With deft fingers, she attempted to retract the dish as Archer had instructed. But the moment that her gloves grazed the holopad, the enormous dish looming in the horizon, turned away from them like a wronged lover. A pair of green pixelated eyes appeared on every screen and monitor in the room. A raw, tortured voice screamed incomprehensibly at them.
Slightly flinching away from the voice cursing them, the Commander mumbled, "Creepy."
"Damn it!" Archer's voice rejoined them. "The VI's overridden the controls. We have to stop him. He's trying to upload his program off planet." Panic and urgency were heavily embedded in his every word.
Uploading the program off world would be bad. Creating the VI had been bad. There was so much needless death around them. And for what? He doubted that the answer would justify the death toll. Thane stepped over a young woman's body. Her lifeless eyes were green like Shepard's, just not the same vibrant alluring color. Kalahira, mistress of inscrutable depths, guide these souls.
The three of them swept their way into the heart of the facility. An angry green glare following them all the while. As they entered the mess hall and common area, the source of the slaughter greeted them with gunfire.
Hard flooring met them as they threw themselves behind the nearest cover, before their shields were shredded to pieces. Garrus and Thane both looked to their Commander for direction. There was a smirk on Shepard's lips as she instinctively flinched down and away from the flying bullets. She looked almost gleeful to have finally been met with action.
Catching her squad-mates' gazes, her hands signaled for Garrus to take point, a position that attracted bullets like a high powered magnet. She and Thane would flank the geth. Her from above. Him from below.
With her instructions made, she saluted them farewell and with a final grin, she switched on her tactical cloak. Disappearing before their eyes, the woman was a wraith in the room. Thane knew exactly where she was, of course, not even Kasumi could hide from him.
Geth fell at their feet. They cut through the enemy with haste and precision. Just as Thane shot a Geth Trooper in the optical lens, he heard the sound of a raging fire roaring behind him. Over his shoulder, he caught sight of a Destroyer approaching Garrus' position, flames fingering over his cover, threatening to cook the turrian alive. Before he could swing his pistol in his target's direction, two consecutive shots obliterated the geth's head, decimating it into a pile of useless machinery.
"God, I love this gun." Shepard popped out of cover as she fondly stroked the length of her sniper rifle.
Garrus also emerged from his hiding place. He threw a faux angry glare to where Anya stood on the level above them. "You almost let him roast me alive, Shepard." It hadn't really been that close and they all knew it. The banter was just playful exchange between old friends.
With an uncaring shrug she replied, "Can't take the heat, get out the kitchen." That was one of her easier humanisms. Throwing herself down to where they were standing, she rolled into a crouch before uncurling and leading her two companions onward.
"Come on," she called over her shoulder. "We've got a dish to destroy."
The station was swarming with fleets of geth. They had to slice through team after team, a task made easier by Shepard's tactical division of her squad. As she and Thane thinned out the forces focusing on Garrus, the turian had less bullets flying at him and more targets distracted between attacking him and defending themselves.
As Thane threw himself off of the collapsing dish and onto the catwalk some distance below, he found himself enjoying the thrill of their fight. Shepard's love of the battle and enthusiasm for action was contagious. He was powerful, an assassin, more lives had been taken by his hands than some could imagine. But he had never really considered the excitement of it, the glorious thrill of slashing through an army and standing triumphant.
Shepard pushed herself onto her feet and took stock of the damage. Satisfied that everything was in place and that she'd made it mostly unscathed, her lips pulled upward. "That was fun."
"I'd rather not do it again," Garrus also pulled himself up onto his feet. Cracking the bones in his neck he added, "If that's alright with you, of course."
Before she could respond, a man ran down the catwalk in their direction. His distressed blue eyes greeted them as he called, "Over here!"
She glanced over her shoulder, her body turning to face the direction her gaze had pointed. Tone no longer playful, she investigated, "What the hell is going on around here?"
The scientist's features were troubled in the wake of everything he had survived. "Man's reach exceeding his grasp. Come on, I'll explain."
They followed the man back to the main facility, where Thane and Garrus were ordered by their Commander to collect the dead and prep their bodies for recovery. She then entered the control room beside Archer for a debriefing.
Thane dragged yet another corpse across the landing zone to be returned to families and given proper services. He looked down the long lines of dead. They were only becoming acquainted with the destruction to be found here. There were still two other facilities that needed to be flushed out before the real problem, the VI, could be dealt with.
Turning to his turian squad-mate, who was scanning each individual for identification, Thane asked, "Is this level of carelessness common place for Cerberus?"
With a glance thrown between the body at his feet and the data on his omni-tool, Garrus nodded in answer to his question. "Back before Shepard died, we dealt with too many cases like this one. Cerberus is always trying to control something, be it Thorian Creepers, Thresher Maws, Rachni, or geth." He leered down the rows of bodies just as Thane had. With a disgusted shake of his head he muttered, "You'd think that they would learn by now."
Thane couldn't help but agree. His gaze wandered up toward the doors that Shepard and Archer had disappeared behind. Thane could understand the woman's unease with allying with this faction. Jack's hostility towards them was also comprehensible. The Commander had many qualities to be admired. She was able to set aside her own trepidations, her own distrust, to save the countless lives that depended on this alliance. Thane respected her.
The doors opened and the Commander descended the stairs to where her team awaited her. Glancing from drell to turian, she forced a smirk onto her lips, a half hearted attempt to lighten the dark task they had yet to complete. "Let's move, gentlemen, I should give you both a chance to get your kill counts as high as mine."
Garrus scoffed, "I don't know, Shepard. If your kill count is anything like mine you'd be the one called Archangel."
When her smile landed on him, his heart leaped from his grasp, throwing itself into his throat. Holding his wrist behind his back, he risked joining their banter. "An assassin does not kill and tell."
That earned him a frivolous bark of laughter. With a wave, she gestured for them to follow her back to the hammerhead and onto the next two stations.
The devastation that welcomed them at Vulcan and Prometheus stations were identical to what they had left behind at Hermes. There were dead bodies and possessed AI's. The VI haunted them as they progressed, watching in outrage as they scored through its army and unlocked the remaining controls. The repartee between Shepard and Garrus went on without end. They were close. That much was obvious to any onlooker. But Thane found himself longing to be more than an onlooker. He desired a similar relationship with the Commander, an intimate friendship to be cherished. Truly the woman must sire similar effects with everyone she encountered.
The Hammerhead easily descended, making a swift touch down on the landing pad. As they exited the Cerberus vehicle, a scattered array of corpses was their reception.
"Looks like you're in, Commander." Archer joined them again. "I'm getting some troubling readings though. The VI is trying to upload its program directly from your location. Get to the server room and shut down the core before it can –" the rest stuttered into static interference.
"Server room," she said to the rest of them. Lifting an eyebrow she tempted, "What could possibly go wrong?"
As they followed the destruction, the VI began to toy with them. Locking unlocked doors, opening previously shut entrances. It was herding them, leading them through the building in the direction that it wanted them to go, forcing them to fight through an onslaught of geth as they went.
Throughout the battle, Thane found it amusing to note that Shepard seemed to love that rocket launcher nearly as much as she loved her sniper rifle. They entered the elevator, kicking aside pieces of geth, and punched in the command to send them down. As the lift started its descent, it began to quake. Pixelated green eyes appeared behind them. The VI howled in indignation. The floor beneath them was no longer trustworthy as the elevator jumped up a level before falling down three. They reached the bottom in a heap, collapsing under the weight of momentum.
As the doors swept open they were faced with geth. Shepard unleashed a few rounds into the foremost enemy, only for it to fall face first, unresponsive to their arrival. The geth were connected to hubs. They were inactive, sleeping and unaware of the visitors evacuating the faulty elevator.
With no threat left to stop them, they moved on. Through the door and down the hallway, they paused before a second door. Shepard pressed the key, expecting it to swoop open as the green screen suggested it should. Instead the green screen came to life. It inched across the door, climbed on to the wall and crawled its way onto the other door a few feet away.
Shepard looked to her companions and shrugged, "change of plans," was her murmur.
The door now available to them was another control room. A body was bent in an unnatural position before the pane. Anya stepped toward it, watching as Thane and Garrus took up defensive positions beside her.
Looking down at the screen she ordered, "Get ready. I wouldn't be surprised if this button summoned a Reaper." She glanced at Garrus. He nodded. She looked to Thane. He tilted his head. Looking back down at the console, she pressed the button and took a step back. The lights in the entire building dimmed. A bolt of brilliant green light shot through the console, blasting skyward like a beacon. Jolts of cybernetic electricity zapped through Shepard. The VI's face manifested before them, screaming as Shepard stumbled over.
"Shepard," Garrus gave her a questioning look. He was upset, but he didn't look as worried as Thane felt.
She wobbled past him, her eyes wide and omni-tool glowing with green pixels. They followed slowly behind her. Too slowly. As soon as she stepped foot back into the hallway, the doors shut behind her, refusing to be reopened. They were trapped and Shepard was alone.
"Shepard!" They both yelled after her, only to be answered by her silence. After a moment, gunfire sounded from the hall on the other side of the door, geth clicked and chirped and the VI howled in its typical irking fashion.
Garrus slammed his fists against the door as Thane tried with all his strength to pry the two slabs apart. All attempts to hack the key and force it open were met by failure. Until this business with the VI was dealt with, they were stuck where they stood. Shepard would have to fend for herself for the rest of the mission.
A frustrated growl tore through Garrus. He was not happy to have been separated from the Commander. And Thane understood why. They were supposed to protect her, to have her back. She depended on them to look out for her, where she couldn't look out for herself. They could not perform that necessary task while hidden away in some room that severed connections between them and the Commander.
"Well this is just beautiful." The turrian slid down the door and glared at his feet. There was nothing more they could do. Rubbing the plates between his eyes he sighed, "She is not going to be happy about this."
Thane wasn't happy about this. He had sworn to help Shepard. Since they might find themselves stowed away for some time, he decided to make himself comfortable. Sitting cross-legged on the floor some odd feet away from Garrus, he inquired, "Do you think that she will be fine without us?"
He nodded without hesitation, "Yeah, she'll be alright." After a thoughtful second he scoffed, "You've seen her fight. She hardly needs us there in the first place." The reassurance was for him as much as it was for Thane. Shepard was Garrus' friend. He would be very upset with himself if she got hurt because he couldn't get a door open.
Though Thane and Shepard did not have the history that she shared with Garrus, he felt empathetic to the turian's plight. He changed the subject so they could detour their thoughts from their shortcomings as squad-mates. "What do you think is going on here?"
"I wish I knew." Garrus shrugged. "You've heard Archer's logs. He was hoping that his brother would be able to communicate with the geth." Shaking his head he stroked the long speared plates at the top of his skull. "There is no such thing as a small mistake for Cerberus, it would seem."
"They brought back Shepard." Thane wasn't trying to defend the human elitists, it just deserved to be said that they did at least one right out of all of their wrongs.
"Yeah," the turian agreed. "And the staff of the entire space station ended up just like all of these poor souls," his three fingers gestured to the body at the other side of the room.
Thane looked at the body his companion had pointed to. Glancing back at him he asked, "If you have so many reservations then why did you join forces with them?"
Shaking his head Garrus corrected, "I joined forces with Shepard. She's the only one that can stand up against the Collectors and take them down. It just so happens that Cerberus is the organization willing to face the truth and deal with the problem."
That was a lot of responsibility for one woman. She had died, only to be revived to a world that had dismissed her warnings as errant and ignored everything she had fought for. Now she was burdened with the task of saving everyone from a race that no one believed existed. She had built her career out of performing the impossible. Thane only felt fortunate to participate before he finally met his end.
With nothing more to say, silence nestled in alongside them. The minutes seemed to drag on, turning into hours. Thane sat patiently, only partly paying attention to his meditations. The sound of the doors sliding apart made his eyes rip open. He and Garrus both leaped onto their feet.
Shepard stood at the entrance. A breath escaped her parted lips at the sight of them, relief settling into her emerald eyes. Shaking her head she grumbled, "There you two are. It's just like you to make me do all of the heavy lifting." Though she joked, there was not a trace of humor in her voice or on her features. Her eyebrows were pinched with antipathy. Her lips were thinned with distaste. Neither hostile emotion was toward her squad, but rather the things she had faced alone.
Thane and Garrus both fled from their entrapment, stepping out into the hallway to where Shepard stood they noticed that she wasn't alone.
Looking at the young human male, wrapped with a blanket around his body, Garrus asked, "What the hell happened?"
"Gentlemen, this is David Archer." She gave the boy a sidelong glance, her anger growing until it licked at their own emotions. "We'll be transporting him to Grissom Academy."
"Archer," Thane peered over at the human. He shared only a slight resemblance to the doctor. Judging by his lack of color and the bruises surfacing along his flesh, it was easy to discern that David had not been handled with care. Returning his attention to Shepard, he observed, "Gavin Archer's brother. Will the doctor be accompanying us?"
"No," was her curt reply. The mention of Gavin Archer made the Commander's features turn in disgust. He was the source of her outrage. Whatever the doctor had done, it filled Anya with such fury, she struggled to contain it. "We'll let Cerberus keep that scumbag." Without another word, she turned to leave, expecting all three males to follow obediently behind.
On their way back to the Normandy, she explained what had happened. She told him and Garrus about how David had shown her Archer's growing obsession with controlling the geth. David had led her through lines of possessed AI until she found herself fighting David the VI. Defeating him before he could send his virus off world, she discovered the true atrocity of what had been done to him. David had been a victim of Cerberus ambitions. He had suffered unspeakably at the hands of his own brother.
When they arrived aboard the Normandy, David had been immediately taken to Dr. Chakwas. She had shooed all from the medical bay. David's autism demanded privacy and care. Even though she had been dismissed from the Med Bay, Shepard loomed outside the window, peering in as she chewed on a fingernail.
Thane stepped up beside her. The rest of the crew had already dispersed; even Garrus had returned to calibrating the guns when he could steal no more words from the Commander. For the most part they were alone, and he could not fight his desire to talk to her. She had not been herself ever since they left the Atlas station. She was upset and infuriated, and Thane wanted to make those unreceptive feelings disappear. He wanted the swift return of his vivacious and sardonic commander.
To his surprise, Shepard spoke before he had the chance to. "I have a brother," her admission caught him off guard. He did not know how to reply, so he didn't, allowing her to continue uninterrupted. "A younger brother named Michael. Every instinct I possess demands that I protect him. Growing up, I was the one who fought off his bullies. I was the one who bandaged his scrapes. That's what family does, they protect each other.'
He clenched his teeth at the mention of family duties. Sometimes one fails one's family, and the price for that mistake is too much to bear.
Shaking her head, Shepard glared at the window, not seeing David or Dr. Chakwas. Her hands balled to fists at her side, her anger radiating from her. "What Archer did to his brother is unthinkable. David is special needs. He needs to be protected more than the average person. That was Gavin's job, to protect his brother. Instead he does this," she violently gestured to the window, biting her lip against the emotions rioting inside her.
Thane followed her pointed fingers through the window, staring at the screen dividing David and Chakwas from their prying eyes. Returning his gaze to the woman beside him, he searched for the words to calm the storm inside her. "You cannot change what has been done to David. This crime cannot be reversed. But you have saved him." She looked up at Thane, her green eyes seeking out his words desperately. "You are giving him a chance to live again. Archer has to live with his crimes, but you get to live with the knowledge that you saved David from his brother."
She didn't reply right away. Instead her gaze returned to the Med Bay. Shepard's brow was no longer furrowed with fury. Her lips were no longer thinned by her upset. She was contemplating his words and allowing her anger to subside with the knowledge that David was going to be alright.
Returning her attention to Thane, a smirk at her lips hinted at breaking through the surface of her expression. "Thank you, Thane."
He bowed his head, "No thanks are necessary." Her gratitude, necessary or not, filled his chest with warmth. He longed for that subtle smirk to break out into a grin. Her smile was a beautiful sight, one he wished to see before returning to Life Support.
Emerald eyes stared at him for a second, reading his features, searching his face. After a moment she said, "I have to go write up a report about the mission." Biting her lip, she timidly added, "I might stop by Life Support later, to talk, if that's alright with you?"
Timid was not a word that Thane would have associated with Shepard. She certainly wasn't shy on the battlefield. And among the rest of the crew she was nothing short of a leader and friend. He couldn't help the smirk that twitched at the corners of his mouth at the sight of her timorous. "I would like that."
"Good," relief washed over her for a second time that day. A smile brightened her face as she took a step back. "I'll, uh, see you later then." She backed into Rupert who reminded her which way was up. Cheeks burning to a red that matched her hair, she fled for the elevators without looking back.
He had been gifted with the sight of her smile, one that he had summoned onto her lips. Thane watched as she disappeared behind a wall before making his way back to his room. He would be restless until she visited him; hers was much welcomed company.
"Gah, I'm an idiot." Shepard pressed her forehead against her knees and let loose an exaggerated sigh.
Hidden behind the curtain of the Commander's drawn knees, Kasumi sniggered. As she painted a coat of vibrant turquoise nail polish onto Anya's toes she lulled, "I'm sure it wasn't that bad, Shep."
Oh, it was that bad. It was worse. "He probably thinks I'm an idiot. 'That's a start.' That's a start? What kind of line is that?"
"A charming one," the smile on Kasumi's lips was loud enough. The thief thought she was being ridiculous.
Peeling her face from her knees she peered over her legs down at her hooded friend. "I don't think you understand, Kasumi. He's not even interested. To let me down easy he said, 'That's intriguing'." Shepard buried her face in her hands. Romancing Kaidan hadn't been anywhere as stressful. Kaidan was easy, simple and boring. Thane was mysterious, observant, thoughtful. Thane was . . . alien. Shepard was drawn to him, her fascination insatiable. He was strong and broody, dangerous and harmless all at the same time. He was sexy, and not the least bit interested in his human commander.
Throwing herself back onto the couch she tossed an arm over her face and groaned, "What am I going to do?"
"Well first, you are going to stop fidgeting so that I don't mess up the polish." When Shepard did as instructed the thief continued, "Now, you are going to not do a single thing differently than you have been. You've already put it out there that you're interested. The rest will work itself out."
"But what if he doesn't want me?"
Kasumi's smile grew, "Trust me, Shep. He wants you."
Arm falling away from her face, the Commander leaned up to catch a better look at Kasumi's expression under the shadow of her hood. The sneak knew something that she didn't. Of course she did, with the shameful way that she used that tactical cloak she was a better spy than she was a thief.
Arching a prying eyebrow she wondered, "How do you know?"
With a playful shrug Kasumi chose that very moment to be coy. "I know everything."
"How to strike a nerve included." Shepard shook her head as she glared up at the ceiling of Kasumi's quarters. It was mildly amusing how much space this tiny woman demanded, stealing as much room for herself as possible. Ever since recruiting the tiresome little hellion, Shepard had formed a special kind of friendship with her. Kasumi was quirky. She was tactful, playful, thoughtful, and full of crap. Her having neighboring quarters with Thane also helped strengthen their growing friendship. While she took the time to visit with Kasumi she might as well also check in with the drell. He was in the neighborhood after all.
But ever since she had blurted out that lame pick up line, Shepard hadn't the nerve to show her face inside Life Support again. She was beginning to miss her talks with Thane, and wondered if he missed them as well.
"You know," Kasumi started, the tiresome brat was going to give her a piece of advice, and Shepard was going to listen with hungry ears because she was desperate for some direction on how to handle the mess she had made for herself. "You can hide out with me for only so long before you bump into him again. Might as well get it over with and spare yourself all the nauseating dramatics."
"Are you kicking me out, Kasumi?"
Another shrug made her shoulders jump. "The polish is dry. As far as I'm concerned, we're done here."
Nodding in full acknowledgement of the betrayal, Shepard retorted, "You're a real pal." Throwing her legs over the side of the sofa and peering down at her brightly colored toes, she stalled for just a moment longer.
Kasumi didn't try to hide her amusement. Fine, Shepard didn't need the traitor anyway. Slipping her boots on, Anya departed the thief's quarters with a discontented huff. As she moseyed out into the hall, she tossed her eyes over to the shut doors of Life Support, and then fled for the mess hall instead. Shepard would brave Thane's gaze later, after a decent meal.
As she rounded the corner, Shepard stopped short, frozen in place by her surprise. Thane, just the man she didn't want to see. Her only saving grace was that he was conversing with Garrus and Tali. If she had to face him at least it wouldn't be alone. Thane didn't seem the type to humiliate his Commander right smack dab where everyone could bear witness.
Despite her concern over speaking to the drell, Shepard was pleased to see him out of Life Support and interacting with the crew. They were more than just a team. They were a family. Humans and Aliens alike would be bleeding together, suffering, laughing, crying, and growing together. She also liked the fact that he was speaking with the turian and quarian. They were her closest friends on board, their opinions the most significant. It was important to Shepard that they liked him, even if he didn't see her that way.
"Shepard," Garrus called her over. Mandibles twitching in mirth he said, "I was just telling Thane about how we first recruited Tali."
Shaking her head, Tali's helmet lit up as she said, "Fist was such an ass."
With a nod the turian agreed. Eyes turning onto the Commander, he stated, "I still don't know why you let him live."
"Fist is an idiot," she shrugged. "But that doesn't mean that he deserved to die."
"Oh he definitely deserved to die." Tali crossed her arms. Of course she was a little jaded on the topic, seeing as Fist had tried to set up the quarian's assassination. "And you've killed people for less."
"Wrex was so upset when he found out that you let him live."
"That krogan is nothing short of a diva." She couldn't help but chuckle at the memory of the massive dinosaur pouting because Shepard had ruined his reputation as a reptilian that got the job done. In the end it was something of little import. They'd had bigger concerns than supercilious thugs who couldn't properly set up a hit.
To Tali, Shepard stated, "We ran into Fist on Omega."
"That's right," Garrus jokingly recalled, "I think he might have preferred death."
"Next time we're there I'll be more than happy to help him with that," Tali was only mostly kidding. She sure knew how to hold a grudge. Maybe that explained her glorious hips. She needed some way to support all that resentment.
Shepard glanced at Thane, only to rip her gaze away and throw it down at her feet. Those black orbs were peering at her, watching her closely. What was he thinking? Did he deem her as big of an idiot as she thought she was?
"Why did you let Fist live?" Thane's voice was like a syringe filled with morphine. He injected her, forcing Anya to disregard her embarrassment and meet his gaze.
Biting her lip, she shrugged in response, still too timid to use her words. How many YMIR Mecs had she obliterated? How many mercenaries had she gunned down just in the past week? And she couldn't keep eye contact with one drell. God, she was pathetic. Clearing her throat, Anya tried to explain without her voice squeaking, "If I killed everyone I met with questionable judgment, this galaxy would be a very empty place."
He considered her words for a moment. Satisfied with her statement, he held his wrist behind his rigid back and wondered, "May I have a moment of your time, Shepard?"
With an uncertain glance at Garrus and Tali, she silently pleaded for either of them to pull an excuse out of their asses as to why Shepard most certainly could not give Thane a moment of her time. When both proved unreliable in saving her hide, she clenched her teeth. There was no good reason for her to say no. It was time for her to man the fuck up and face Thane.
Forcing a smirk onto her lips, she nodded, "Of course."
Thane inclined his head at Tali and Garrus before turning in the direction of Life Support. Ah crap. They were going to have this conversation in private. This was going to suck so hard. Rolling her shoulders, Anya made a face at her friends before following Thane through the mess hall. They were going to pay for the crime that they had unknowingly committed. No one let Shepard find her way under the bus without repercussions. No one.
When the doors slid shut behind them, Shepard cringed at what would surely come out of Thane's mouth. 'I don't see you that way, Commander.' 'Let's just be friends.' Friends, she couldn't have enough friends, right? The more the merrier.
He stood before the window, peering down at the drive core, silent as he pondered whatever it was that happened on the inside of that head of his. When a second passed without a word from him Shepard asked, "You wanted to speak with me?"
"Yes," he glanced over his shoulder before turning away again. Why wouldn't he look at her? "Now that you are here though, it seems more difficult to talk about."
Yeah, telling the Commanding Officer of the ship you are serving on that you aren't interested in a romantic relationship is usually a tough thing to do. Unless Shepard was jumping the gun and this had nothing to do with her. Her heart fell as she scolded herself. There she was pining over what she said and how he might have taken it, when there was likely some bigger issues that he was dealing with, like dying. She didn't know enough about drell anatomy or physiology to tell if he looked sick or not.
"I've got time," her eyebrows furrowed with concern, "take it at your own pace."
"Thank you. I fear I have already done that for too long." He finally turned to face her. His expression was neutral, not giving away anything. So much mystery clouded around the man, the more Shepard found out, she realized the less she really knew about him.
Pacing to where he stored his weapons, Thane said, "I had a family once. I still have a son. His name is Kolyat. I haven't seen him for a very long time."
Wow, a family. Her shoulders slumped. That explained his lack of interest in her. Shepard fought to keep her face expressionless, showing her disappointment might have led to misinterpretation. Shaking away her sidetracking thoughts, Shepard inquired, "Did something happen to them?"
He gave her a sidelong glance, a somber gleam to his serious eyes. "I abandoned them," Thane admitted, "Though not all at once, nothing dramatic. No sneaking out in the middle of the night. No final argument or slammed door." His eyes found hers again, silently requesting that she understand. "I just did my job. I hunted and killed across the galaxy. 'Away on business' my wife would tell people." Thane looked back at the guns as he murmured, "I was always away on business."
Alright, the time had come for Anya to get over herself and view Thane as crew. It was all that they could be. She had to come to terms with that. Monitoring his expression, Shepard asked, "How long has it been since you talked?"
"Ten years. He showed me some of his school work and asked if we could 'dance crazy'. We did that when he was younger. "
"Dance crazy" sounded an awful lot like what people referred to Shepard's dancing as. Amusement pinched the corners of her lips. She returned to the purpose of their conversation. "You've never mentioned this before. Why now?" Anya wouldn't admit that finding out that Thane was married and with children had irked her a bit. She didn't have a problem with kids. It was just that being attracted to married men wasn't a typical practice for her.
"When my wife departed from her body I . . . attended to that issue. I left Kolyat in the care of his aunts and uncles. I have not seen or talked to him since."
She lifted an eyebrow, "That's not the choice I expected." But then again what did she really know about Thane? Not enough, that was for sure.
"My body is blessed with the skills to take life. The hanar honed them in me. I have few others." Lips twitching in what could have been mistaken for a frown he continued, "I didn't want that life for Kolyat. I hoped he would find his own way. If he hated me, so be it. He would not have shared the path of sin." Turning his body so that he was completely facing the Commander he said, "I used my contacts to trace Kolyat. He has become disconnected."
A dead wife and troubled son. That explained more than she expected it to. If Thane's family was in danger then there was nothing that Shepard wouldn't do to help him. There was nothing more important to her. "What's wrong with him? Is he hurt?"
Shaking his head, he explained, "Something happened that should not have. He knows where I've been and what I've done." Thane frowned as he considered what his son was up to. "I don't know his reasons but he's gone to the Citadel. He's taken a job as a hit man. I'd like your help to stop him. This is not a path he should walk."
It appeared that the apple truly didn't fall far from the tree, no matter what planet the tree was from. Shepard could understand Thane's qualms with Kolyat taking up such a dangerous role. If Shepard had learned that Michael joined Cerberus because he wanted to be closer to her, she would have done anything in her power to get him as far away from the organization as possible.
Thane was her shipmate, her squad-mate, her friend - though that made Shepard cringe. She would do anything within her power to help him. There was just one problem. "Thane, I don't have your contacts. And I don't have your tracking skills," okay two problems. "Why do you need my help for this?"
"I don't need your help. I want it. The last time I saw my son," he was thrown into a memory. A terrible recollection of his deceased wife's funeral passed between them.
Grimacing apologetically, she looked away from him. Real, smooth Commander. She may as well have forced him to remember the day his wife had died. "I didn't mean to make you relive that."
With a shrug he simply stated, "Perfect memory, it is sometimes a burden."
Little else needed to be discussed. Kolyat needed his father. And Thane needed – wanted – Shepard's help. She would do whatever needed to be done to set the drell's mind at peace. "I'll get us to the citadel as soon as possible."
"Lola," James retrieved her from her memories. His Latin features were unusually hard, stern in their humorless surroundings, as he pointed with his thumb over his shoulder in gesture towards the lightless room behind him. "Come check out what Scars found. He said you'd want to see it."
With a nod, she gave the sparking security station a final glance before turning to follow Vega to where Garrus awaited them. Kaidan had been uncertain that they'd find anything in Sanctuary; and aside from fleeing Cerberus Shuttles, a few dead Reaper forces, and some stragglers, he had been mostly right. But something was terribly wrong with the barrenness they had encountered.
Sanctuary had been built to house hundreds, thousands, of refugees. Countless people had swarmed to the facility for safety. Where were the families? Where were the refugees?
A synthetic female voice spoke over the intercom, assuring them that they had made it to Sanctuary, that they were finally safe. Shepard grudgingly thought of the breaths of relief that were released at the sound of her voice, how many people had slumped in gratitude of finding safety. If Cerberus was involved then Shepard doubted that the refugees found what they were looking for.
As she entered the sparsely illuminated hall where the turian stood watch, she investigated, "What have you found?"
"It's Miranda," he muttered as he stepped aside for Anya to see the consul.
She knew that she'd run into the ex-Cerberus agent at one point or another. Oriana's voice had warned them to steer clear of the facility. If Oriana was here then surely Miranda was not far behind. Anya was eager to unearth what was happening inside of Sanctuary. Miranda had been worrying after her sister since they first met together weeks ago. Why was Oriana at Sanctuary? How had Miranda let her sister, and what was happening to her, slip through her fingers? Shepard cared for little else the way she cared for her family. She understood, and encouraged, Miranda's protective nature.
Jaw tightening, Shepard breathed heavily to keep her temper from flaring. She'd had it up to here with Cerberus. When would enough be enough for these goddamn people? As if she hadn't had reason enough to hate them before they revived her. As soon as the Collectors had been dealt with, they had done anything and everything to get on Shepard's bad side, and stay there. For the unforgivable crime of killing Thane, everyone who wore a Cerberus emblem was as good as dead.
"Okay," Anya sighed as she cracked the bones in her neck. All it took was the end of the world for everyone to decide to fuck each other over. And who did they all turn to to save the day? Yeah, Shepard. It was always Shepard. The galaxy couldn't hold itself together for a freaking second without her constant supervision. The moment she turned her gaze, Collectors abducted human colonists and Reapers wanted to obliterate everything. She was the most underpaid babysitter in the entirety of the universe.
"So we've got Reapers, Cerberus, and Miranda's crazy father. Any ideas how this all fits?"
Garrus and Vega looked at one another before shaking their heads and shrugging in unison. Discomfort nested itself deep in Shepard's gut, burrowing talons into the flesh of her insides. She wasn't going to like what they were about to find. As was the case whenever she dealt with Cerberus. They were going to stumble upon another unspeakable atrocity, one whose memory would never be forgotten, and one which Shepard would be expected to clean up.
Sucking in a deep breath, Anya comforted herself with the fact that it was almost over. The Crucible was just about complete. The Galaxy was unified against the Reapers. Her job was nearly done. All that was left to deal with, was The Illusive Man and his bigoted terrorist group. Practically everything else was in place. Soon she would step into the yawning abyss of fate and meet her certain and anticipated end. She would cross the sea and finally be in Thane's arms again.
Shepard would find relief in death, whether or not she succeeded in saving the galaxy.