JohnLock - I Did it For You
Sherlock Holmes had never intended to hurt John Watson.
The consulting detective lacked social skills, and even though he'd lived all those months with his blogger, he hadn't managed to pick up enough to know what was right and what was wrong in those situations.
He did what he had to do in order to save his only friends.
He had learned that when it came to Moriarty, one had to expect the unexpected. So as soon as he figured out he most likely only had one way out, in order to save himself and those he cared about, he started planning. He gained help from Molly which he had not expected. He knew though that without her, it would have been harder to get his plan to work; no one else trusted him.
Sherlock never wanted to hurt John. Because it was HIS John, his in every way apart from the love of lovers.
They loved each other as brothers, as companions, true; but there would never be anything more than that. And it was fine; they did not care, because it is the best kind of love.
When you have a friend like that, you ate truly blessed; to have someone willing to listen, someone who believes in you no matter what, someone who keeps coming back, who never leaves despite, or maybe because of indifferences.
In short; someone who is a part of you, of your soul, someone who belonged to you and you belonged to, long before you met; your other half.
And it was because of this that Sherlock would not go back in time and do it different if he was given the opportunity. Because he knew he could not stand the thought of his blogger dead; not stand the thought of Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade gone from this world because of his selfishness.
Sherlock Holmes might be called a number of things, and 99.82% of that might be true. But he would never let anyone call him selfish, not after this. When the world found out about his sacrifices, what he'd done in order to save his friends… No, no one will ever call Sherlock Holmes, the world's only Consulting Detective selfish after this.
A small part of him did it in order to save his reputation, to clear his own name, but he doesn't care about that. All he cares about is keeping those he cares about safe, in any way he can. And that's what he did; he saved them. For three years he kept them safe, kept them out of harm's way.
And now he has deduced that it is long enough; now at last he will put them out of their misery.
Well, Mrs. Hudson knows, so it's only John and Lestrade he has to tell.
Let them punch him, say they hate him, how much grief and trouble he's caused them; he will not care. He cares about them, and he will let them know that, whether or not they will believe his excuses, he cannot change that.
He hopes John will believe him though; he really does. Because John is the only one who matters. Sherlock looks at John where he sits by his fake grave, sits there in the dark, in the rain, grieving for his friend who's been lost to him for three years.
The detective walks up to his blogger and lays a hand on that shoulder he knows so well.
And when John turns around and their eyes meet, he says the words he has longed to say "I did it for you"