Chapter 2

I stood nervously outside the DADA classroom, already a few minutes late to class. Okay, just be cool, I told myself. Be cool, calm, explain to him why you're late, and you'll be fine. It isn't like he's Professor Snape or McGonagall.

Okay. Ready. I reached out, opened the door and entered the room. Professor Lupin was not addressing the class when I entered. He was standing quietly behind his desk as the students arranged themselves along the back wall, he was looking at a sheet of parchment. All the tables and chairs were again pushed to the side of the room. I closed the door as quietly as I could, hoping to sneak inside without him noticing, but he looked up and smiled at me when the door closed rather loudly.

Wow. Has he always had such a gorgeous smile? Wait a minute, what am I thinking? Teacher, he is a teacher. Uh oh, he's still looking at me; damn, he must be expecting a reason why I'm late…

"Umm…"

Umm? Umm?? Say something proper! Oh great, there's that curious expression again. His eyes are twinkling, why are his eyes twinkling? That looks like amusement…

"Is there a reason you are late, Faylinn?" he asked pointedly, thought not unkindly.

The sound of his voice knocked me back in to reality, just as it had done in the last lesson we had.

"Uh… yeh, I'm sorry I'm late Professor, I got held back by some younger year students..."I said nervously.

"That's perfectly fine, if you could just hand me your homework and join the rest of the class," he said, "We were just getting read for the patronus test."

I nodded, avoiding looking at him directly by rummaging through my bag for my homework. As I handed it to him he smiled at me again. This time I was ready. I smiled back, albeit timidly and hurried off to join Audrey. With any luck, he'd think my momentary blankness was because I was trying to think of an excuse.

"What's wrong?" Audrey asked, looking concerned, "You never go blank like that."

"I'm not ever sure myself… I'll explain later," I whispered back.

I watched Professor Lupin as he called forward a Ravenclaw boy to demonstrate his patronus. He really does have nice eyes, and a winning smile. I don't mind admitting that, I thought to myself, that isn't something to worry about… anyone can appreciate the good looks of others. The worrying part is the way his smile made my mind blank and the fact that I can't keep my eyes off his; it is literally making my heart race.

Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no! This can only mean one thing… No! Don't think it… you're just overreacting.

"Faylinn, your turn," Professor Lupins voice called out, interrupting my trail of very confused thought.

I stepped forward nervously, uncomfortably aware that the professor was looking at me expectantly.

"No need to be worried," he said kindly, "I've seen you produce a patronus before."

Ah, that is very nice of your professor, I thought, but that isn't why I'm nervous… But how do you tell a teacher that his eyes are so attractive that they are making your mind go blank? The simple answer would be, you don't, and you focus on the blackboards instead so you don't fail the test.

I stared intently at the blackboard in front of me and allowed the memory of the day that Lockhart was fired to replace my thoughts of Lupins eyes, raised my wand, and said, "Expectopatronum!"

A silvery-white swan erupted from the end of my wand. I breathed a sigh of relief – for a moment I was worried that I would not be able to produce a proper patronus, given my nerves.

"Excellent patronus," Professor Lupin said encouragingly, as he ticked my name of his list.

I stumbled back to my place against the wall, watching him again. His light brown hair framed his face nicely and matched his eyes perfectly. He is actually very handsome.

Great, I thought, as an all too familiar tingling sensation rushed through my stomach, I really did just think that, didn't I? Okay… maybe I just should stop thinking all together before I think something really stupid…

But the more I tried not to think, the more the thoughts kept creeping across my mind. Scary thoughts, thoughts I would rather not be having about a teacher. Like this one, which popped out rather randomly as I was successfully (or so I thought) distracting myself by watching Percys fox patronus strut around the room: I think I have a crush on him. Argh! I thought it! Who would have thought thinking could be so dangerous? Oh man, I hope Professor Lupin can't do legimancy.

Is it really a crush though, I wondered silently as I watched Professor Lupin explain something to the class. I find him good looking, there is no denying that. He makes me nervous when he talks to me, and every time he smiles at me I get this curious tingling sensation in my stomach. He has a nice voice too…

Yep, I thought pessimistically, leaning back in my chair, shuddering at the very thought. It is official. I have a crush on a Professor Lupin.

- - -

Audrey and I spent the time before dinner that day on the school grounds, sitting under a large tree near the lake. It was one of our favourite spots – it was shady, and had a nice view of the lake, though I suspect the reason Audrey likes it so much is that anyone going from the castle to the Quidditch stadium can easily be spotted.

I was seated comfortably with my back against the tree trunk, while Audrey was lying down on her side, flicking through our transfiguration text book.

"Audrey?"

"Mmm?" she replied her face so close to the book that it was a miracle she could read it at all.

"I have to tell you something," I said nervously.

"What?" she asked curiously, finally looking up from her textbook.

"Wait, can you cast a notice-me-not charm on us first, in case someone is listening?" I asked, leaning away from the tree trunk and looking to see if anyone was listening.

"There's no one close to us at all," Audrey pointed out, "We'd see them, we are kinda in the middle of no where, you know. Plus a lot of students don't even bother coming out on the ground anymore, what with those horrible dementors and the fear of Sirius Black…"

"Just cast it anyway, just in case. I'd do it myself, but you know, you're better than me at it," I added, smiling sheepishly.

"Okay," she agreed, sitting up straight and casting the spell, "Now, you've got my attention. What's up? Spill!"

"Er, okay," I said, giggling nervously.

Audrey raised an eyebrow, but waited for me to talk.

"Umm… I think I have a crush…" I said cautiously, waiting to see her reaction. I can't help but feel it is best not to throw this at her too quickly. I mean, he's a teacher… I don't want the girl to have a heart attack.

"That's all?" she said, looking disappointed, "You made me cast the charm just for that? Gee… I was expecting something a little more, you know, interesting…"

I laughed at her frankness, and said, "Yeh, I know. Trust me; I wouldn't have bothered with the charm if it was just a normal crush. But this isn't what I would call a normal crush."

"And why is that?" Audrey asked, her curiosity building up again.

"Um, let's just say, the person is a little… different."

"Well, tell me already!"

"Aw, Audrey, you know how shy I get about these kinds of things!" I said, giggling again. Unfortunately, I tend to become shy and very giggly when telling someone about a crush for the first time. I don't know why it happens, it just does. There must be something in my genetics. Audrey is used to it though, she is usually the one who has to guess who the guy is because I feel weird just saying straight out. And in this case, considering that my crush is at least something like fifteen years older than me, I have even more reason to nervous about telling her.

"I'm going to have to guess, aren't I?" she said, exasperated, though amused.

"Yes," I said smiling innocently.

"It isn't Oliver, is it?" she asked suspiciously.

"No! Of course not!" I said, taken-back, "Trust me, he's all yours."

"Right," she said thoughtfully, "Is it Albion Ward?"

"Nope."

"Blyth Moore?"

"Nope."

"Gratian Edeson?"

"Double nope!"

"Percy Weasley?"

"Serious guesses only please."

"Marcus Flint?"

"Eww!" I cried emphatically, "That's like, a crime against humanity!"

"I know," Audrey chuckled, "But I ran out of ideas. Isn't this the point I give up and you start describing him?"

"Yeh it is," I agreed half-heatedly. It was always fun to listen to her guesses, "Okay, well, he has light brown hair and yes, he's kinda poor looking, he's really nice… we only meet him this week…" I let my voice trail off as Audrey started looking at me disbelievingly.

"The only person who fits that description is Lupin," she said skeptically, "and even you, Faylinn, are not that weird."

"Good guess!" I said cheerfully, ignoring her skepticism, "took you long enough."

"What, you're not serious, are you?" she asked, looking alarmed.

"Um, actually, yeh, I am," I said self-consciously.

Audrey gawped at me with her mouth hanging slightly open.

"Fay, he's a teacher," she said, whispering the last word as though it was cursed.

"I know, trust me, I reacted that way too, but, well, you know, sure, he's a teacher," I rambled, "but he's a really good-looking teacher, and he's really nice too… and his smile is just gorgeous," I added, sighing deeply.

"Argh, please, stop," Audrey said, looking slight repulsed, "Fay, listen to yourself. You have a crush on a teacher. He must be like, what, fifteen years older than us?"

"Yeh, I know," I said quickly, "But, I mean, it's just a silly crush, isn't it? Not like I'm in love with him or anything…"

"I guess…" Audrey said uncertainly.

"What harm can it do?" I pressed, "I'll probably get over it in a few weeks, you know me…"

"Knowing you, those few weeks will be full of annoying conversations about how cute he is, about whether he likes your hair worn up or down, about whether I agree that grey robes look better on him than black robes –"

"Alright, alright, I get the point," I mumbled.

"Good, I mean, it's bad enough when you go on like that, but seriously, when it's a teacher you're talking about, that is just creepy."

"I know," I sighed, "I'll try to be considerate."

"Thanks."

"So…" I said, trying to suppress a grin, "Do you think he's married?"

"Argh!" Audrey cried, desperately blocking her ears with her hands, as I laughed heartedly at her reaction.