Yep! A Note from me.. . So good to see so many oldie but goody wolfgirls still hanging around - still supportive of this ole fic! Thanks to all that sent PM's and refav'd etc! Hugs to you all.
But, truly - I'm posting this for the newbies and because I get asked about this one so often. So some words of warning for those of you that don't know me - Welcome to the craziness! I got into all this to have fun, spread the wolf love and give Jake his due - over and over again! No other intents. I don't take proper writing very seriously- I'm here to express ideas and tell stories like you might around the bonfire - and to appreciate what other wolfgirls have to offer. I'm not here to win any grammar awards, or accolades for perfect writing form or style. This being my first official FanFic, I had a terrible time with things like POV ( point of view) pace, and punctuation. This story is written in Jake and Bella's point of view switching very often. This is one of my worst chapters on POV - and I'm not going back and rewriting this fic from a different POV at this time.
So many of the readers I met, and became friends with, couldn't give a rats ass about my writing sins. The people I cared about enjoying the story did - and have told me time and time again. Apparently - a hell of a lot more people read this one than ever reviewed or left me a note - but thats ok - because we had 4 years to for it all to come out .
So, I apologize up front, that after 4 years I still haven't had time to fix this story up! Running a site like JBNP can do that to a person! Sometime you might have the opportunity to compare this fic to Take Me By Storm - at least you'll see I did learn a few things over the years!
Just Have Fun and Love Jake - thats all I ask. HUGS!
CHAPTER 2 - Its a Journey, Not a Destination.
BPOV:
I never felt so instantly at home with anyone in my life.
I marveled at that thought with my arms wrapped tightly around Jake's waist, my cheek resting between his shoulder blades.
I was the reserved type. It usually took me awhile to make friends.
Moving all the time didn't make it any easier,either. I actually had a harder time trusting people after surviving some bad times. Kids can be really mean...especially girls.
I guess I never allowed myself to get close to people knowing I'd be gone when the year was over. Which is probably why I never had a boyfriend.
Ever since I started noticing guys, I'd gone to a different school every year. So, nothing really ever had a chance to develop with anyone.
But this is different. This move to LaPush. I think my mom is trying to make up for the past.
Here, I have history. We have friends, people we know.
Everyone in town knows my Mom and Dad. They knew the sweet, ditsy, hippie, Renee, "the girl the Swan boy married" and everyone knew me too, even tho I was pretty clueless about most of them.
But, Jacob. Jake's different. We remember each other, have history, have been childhood friends.
I feel so at home with Jake. Being with him is so...easy.
Actually, with my arms wrapped around his amazing body, I was feeling a lot of different things about Jake. Things I never thought I'd feel about anyone!
I was crushing on Jake, hard. Well, my body was anyway...
He turned into the parking area for First Beach and shut off the bike. We sat silently for a moment taking in the scenery.
Out here, the coast was cold and rugged. The surf was always heavy and the sun a rare find even in summer. Everything was misty grey and white and salty near the beach. The sea stacks such iconic landmarks for me.
"Waddya think?" he grinned at me over his shoulder.
"Its exactly how I remember it." I whispered back to him.
He was off the bike and pulling me into his arms before I finished surveying the long lost beach of my childhood.
"Lets walk." he nodded towards the beach, taking my hand.
Wrapping his large protective hand around mine, he smiled, like it was the most natural thing in the world. After just a moment of resisting the urge to pull away, I was happy to allow my hand to rest in his, for as long as he wanted it.
It was a nearly perfect late summer evening. Being late August, it was still warm, the sea gulls screeching overhead, in lazy circles.
The cloudy, grey, humid sky was clearing, just enough at sunset, that you could see the beauty of it over the ocean, watch the colors come to life on the water. The breeze picking up, ushering in a warm, clear, starry night.
Jake and I walked the length of First Beach, my favorite, and Second Beach, scenic and rugged, but Jake thought Third Beach was too rough and too far for today. So we turned around to head back.
We talked about everything. What our families were doing, how we were doing in school, our preparations for graduation, what we were thinking about after graduation.
"Hey! Our birthday's are coming up!" he announced excitedly.
"Wow! You know when my birthday is?" I felt shocked yet a little impressed. "I don't remember your birthday Jake, when is it?"
"10 days after yours, September 23rd!" he grabbed me by the waist and spinning us around. " Hot damn, woman! We're gonna be 18! " he yelled.
He made me laugh. He was so free and happy and so comfortable with me, with everything. His smiles were always real, never fake, his eyes always sparkling.
"Bella!" he said loudly, setting me back on my feet." I got tickets to see Aerosmith in Seattle for my birthday! Do you wanna to go with me? "
"Aerosmith?" I kinda winced...I wasn't sure who that was.
"Don't tell me, you don't know who AEROSMITH is." he whined, then started singing, and playing air guitar to a bunch of "old rock" songs I recognized.
'They're still touring?" I was kinda shocked.
"Hell yeah!" he snorted, " You just watch, we'll have a blast. Kid Rock is with them, it'll be an awesome show. Is it a date?" he urged, pulling me to him.
A date? I gulped.
I froze, staring into his dark eyes, for a long time. His hands resting on my waist, we were so close to each other, and I wasn't nervous. There was such a deep connection going on between us , it was impossible to deny.
It was as if we'd been waiting for each other, missing each other all this time.
"I'm so glad you're here Bella" he whispered, his voice changing to a deeper, huskier,more serious voice.
As his face drifted closer to mine... I heard him sigh,"do you know how beautiful you are?"
His warm breath washed across my face, his scent intoxicating me. I wanted to kiss him.
My heart nearly thumping out of my chest, I was suddenly so warm, too warm...I couldn't breathe...oh shit , getting dizzy...
I closed my eyes so I wouldn't faint and Jacob Black, my mud pie partner in crime, put his lips gently against mine.
Mmmmmmm.
His lips were full and soft, covering mine like a fluffy, moist quilt, moving gently against mine. Whispering his want, calling silently to the parts of me that needed awakening.
No, I had never been kissed like Jacob was kissing me. He was soft and warm, holding me tightly against his body. His giant hands left my waist engulfing my face tenderly.
He smelled so good, like out doors and fresh air. His mouth was sweet and anxious to please, to taste and explore. Leaving me weak in the knees, Jake sensed it as he wrapped his strong arms around me again, tugging me even more tightly against him than before.
He opened his mouth, nipping my bottom lip gently, pulling it into his mouth. Moaning softly on accident, the sound acted like a trigger. My heart pounding faster, a rush of heat flowed through my body. Jake groaned, deepening the kiss by gently parting his lips, pushing mine open with his in compliance..urging me to follow...he put his tongue into play,stroking into my mouth with such longing. I could feel his excitement, in his trembling hands, in his quickened breathing.
No! I had NEVER been kissed like this before. I was spell bound, putty in his hands in a lustful stupor.
His hands left my face, lowering to my neck where his fingers took in every detail, stroking my neck, circling my ears. He replaced his hands with his lips on my throat, as his hands moved on to my shoulder's. This gave me a chance to catch my breath. His hands gently massaged my shoulders, and fell down my back slowly, resting back at my waist pulling me back against him possessively while he kissed my neck, chin, jaw .
A new overwhelming feeling surged up inside of me then peaked leaving me breathless, and an unfamiliar release of moisture tortured me, making me wiggle a little uncomfortably.
He brought his face up and smiled mischievously at me.."you like this, Bells?" he cooed softly in my ear.
Oh my god very much! my mind screamed but I think I just grunted out loud, with my eyes still closed.
"Show me" He whispered pressing his lips back to mine more urgently this time.
Show him...what does that mean? My mind racing, I started to panic. Snap out of it! I growled to my self. Don't just hang here like a lump, get in the action! But how? what?
I opened my mouth farther, letting my tongue meet his. Our tongues tangled joyfully. My hands woke up and crept up the back of his shirt, feeling his bulging muscles. He was amazing. I realized Jake's hands were just under my shirt at my waist, stroking the exposed skin there with his finger tips, ever so gently.
Goosebumps raced over my body.
"Black! you straggly haired mutt! What the fuck are you doing!" A voice boomed across the sand above the crashing waves.
"Shit.." he whispered, pulling away and adjusting himself quickly, leaving my lips red, swollen and hungry for more. I noticed he stood uncomfortably, and a huge bulge was pressing on his jeans right where I had just been pressed against him.
"Newton you dickless fag what are you doing on my land bitch!" Jake barked back.
They grabbed each others hand and did the handshake pull in for a half hug thing.
"Isn't she a little light for you Jake?" he motioned at me with a nod.
"O,h hell no! Mike, this is Isabella Swan, Charlie's little girl, my long lost childhood playmate." Jake gushed with a huge grin as my introduction.
"Playmate...I'll say...Hi I'm Mike" we shook hands. " Nice to meet you. So Charlie's your dad huh?"
Just as we were chatting away, a girl ran up whining.
"MIIIIIKE, WEEEERE WAAITING!"
" Oh. Who's our friend Jake?" she demanded to know who I was immediately.
"Jessica, Bella Swan, Bella, Jessica." Jake announced curtly.
We exchanged weak "Hello's" and Mike saved the day.
"Come on you guys, at least help me unload this shit."
"What! You guys having a bon fire?" Jake asked excitedly.
"What else is there to do around here?" Mike joked back
"Really! What did you bring to eat?" Jake begged as he ran ahead to keep up with Mike...with that, that THING between his legs.
We unloaded a van that said Newton's Outfitters and Sporting Goods.
When we got to the bonfire spot about 10 kids from town were there.
They all knew Jake, especially some girl named Lauren.
Everyone seemed nice, they knew my Dad of course, and they tried to talk me into going to Forks high school. They make lots of jokes about school on the Rez and about Jake. But it was clear that Jake and his friends were well liked even out in town. Apparently Jake was an athlete that competed against these guys and they were all jealous of his bike and mechanical skills.
Everything was just fine till someone had too much wine.
Lauren came over and stood between Jake and I with a sleeping bag caped over her shoulders.
"You don't mind if I borrow your friend, do you." she snarled at me and sat down in Jake's lap wrapping the sleeping bag around them.
"Lauren! Get the hell off!" he said firmly standing up and dumping her from his lap on to the ground.
"Jake...no!...I want you, I didn't WANT to break up. You KNOW how my dad is!" she started crying and jumped up and began hitting Jake in the chest.
A bunch of the kids grabbed her, wrestling her away from us, apologizing profusely. Jake grabbed the sleeping bag and my hand, as he stormed off, stomping through the sand.
I don't know why I giggled...but I did.
"What!' he wheeled around, stopping us dead in our tracks , looking at me with death's daggers in his eyes.
"What was THAT!" I giggled again.
His face softened and he broke into a slight awkward smile and said "Nothing! That was absolutely nothing!" Glancing back over my head quickly.
"OKay, if you insist." I teased lightly, pulling my hand from his angry grip. "You sure got upset about nothing then didn't you?" I tried joking but still stepping away from him a bit.
He stepped forward laying his hand against my face, looking me in the eyes..." Bella, she doesn't mean anything, OK? Please. I want to have fun" he lowered his lips to mine, leaving a soft kiss on them "with just you."
I shivered violently, from the kiss and his intensity, but mostly from the cold breeze blowing in off the Pacific now that is was getting late.
"You're cold. Come on." Wrapping the sleeping bag around me he dragged me on, nearer the parking area.
Off to the left there was a little abandoned fire up against the cliff.
He turned to me quickly.
"Do you want to go home Bells, or do you want to hang out some more... up to you! "
" The sleeping bag helps...but if you're bored of me, we can go."
"Bored of you! HA! Come on! "Sweeping me up into his arms , he climbed over a bunch of piled up drift logs and planted us down in front of the secluded, abandoned fire - nearly hidden by drift wood, and protected by the walls of a cliff.
He threw some more wood on the small fire to make it burn warmer, and crawled onto the sleeping bag, where I laid it down.
He was explaining how the salt water in the driftwood makes the fire crackle and change colors.
I was just staring like a zombie into the flames, listening to his warm sexy voice...when he startled me.
"I know! Who the fuck cares!" he laughed, pulling me onto him as he laid back.
I landed roughly on his chest, with my legs sprawling awkwardly, entwining with his.
"I wish we never ran into those guys" he whispered as he pulled my hair forward, playing with it "we were making great progress getting to know each other without them."
He was staring at me intently again, his hands rubbing my back, slowly and soothingly.
"I know." I tried agreeing lightheartedly. " Where were we anyway when they so rudely interrupted " I tried joking.
"About, right, here I'd say!" And Jake flipped me onto my back, lowering himself to kiss me.
Suddenly he pulled away, reaching to his t-shirt jerking it off from the neck. "I get so warm, Bells. Hope you don't mind." he apologized as he tossed his tshirt aside.
MIND! The sight of his tan, muscular chest and abs had me breathless.
I couldn't keep my hands from his chest, and then I caught sight of a light trail of soft dark hair accenting his sexy belly button and delicately lowering into his pants . I gasp as my heart stuttered! Th th this alone turned me on unbearably!
That feeling was back. My hips rolled, my thighs clenching involuntarily.
"Uuummm, you smell amazing, Bells." and he crushed his lips back on to mine.
His muscles were amazing, his arms a complete turn on, they held me tightly, moved me forcefully...
I gasped at his perfection, and couldn't keep my hands from him.
I grazed over every inch of his abs, chest , sides, arms.
That feeling was torturing me ...the tension, the excitement building, tickling me inside. I barely noticed him unbuttoning my shirt,
but I heard his moan of apparent satisfaction, as the breeze across my bare chest called me back to the moment.
He had my shirt wide opened, my breasts fully exposed. We both gasped at the same time.
"No bra?" he smiled at me.
"You try wearing one in this heat " I whispered as he came down , quieting my lips from protesting, his hands cupping my breasts.
Oh sweet Jesus, why am I letting this happen? I couldn't control the moan that escaped into his mouth.
JPOV
Oh my god...whats wrong with me! I can't control myself around her!
We just met up, childhood friends for chrissakes and I'm ready to go wolf on her! I can't control myself! and Little Jake isn't even listening to me.
I don't suppose kissing her and grinding against her like this is any help to anyone!
I know! I do care about her! I'm gonna fuck this whole thing up if I don't get control! Lil Jake's throbbing and screaming at me to let him loose.
Take a breath.. take it easy...relax...its journey not a destination, I tried coaching myself firmly.
I want Bella, Oh my god do I want Bella...for more than this. Shes not this kinda girl, I can't do this, not what Lil'Jake is planning anyway.
I started saying the alphabet in Spanish. Something Sam told me would help keep these "situations" in control.
Her breasts feel amazing in my hands...I think she's enjoying this...but what do I know...Her nipples hardened in response, yeah shes liking this.
I wonder...how many guys she's done this with at other reservations.
No! I shook it from my head. There's no way Bella is anything like the Rez Rats! I bet she'll be surprised when I have to tell her, I never have.
Back to BPOV
Jake...I don't think he knows I'm a virgin.
Who would think that ,the way I was grinding up on him...shit.
How many 18 year old virgins are there anymore...really.
I feel like a leper. No one wants the inexperienced klutz.
I don't think I could EVER take the bulge in his pants.
He ground his excitement even harder into me, yeah I'm sure I couldn't take what he was hiding.
Shaking now...with desire, fear, exhaustion. I had to stop. We had to..
"Jake! Please! Stop!" I said just loud enough for him know I meant it.
He pulled up off my chest. I grabbed my shirt to cover myself. I was visibly shaking.
"What Bells? What did I do?" his face was truly pained and as innocent as a child's.
"Jake, you didn't do anything. Its me." I turned away ashamed and embarrassed.
"What Bells..no! its not you...you're...you're.. ." He whispered tugging at my shoulder to face him again.
"It is me, trust me. I must be the only almost 18 year old...virgin..(I whispered) on the planet! I'm so sorry. I just can't do this. Not here, not now...I'm not ready." Lowering my head, feeling ashamed I was a tease and a disappointment to Jacob as I buttoned my shirt frantically.
"Bella, I'm sorry. I'm glad you told me, tho. I want your first time to be special too." He adjusted his position and sat to the side of me. Studying his hands nervously he continued.
"But if it makes a difference, I promise I wasn't trying to get THERE!" After a long thoughtful pause, he mumbled..."I want my first time to be special too."
JPOV
Bella's eyes flashed instantly to take mine in. She was wary of my words and on defensive of one liners. She must have found what she was looking for cuz her eyes softened, she smiled shyly, and shifted her body back towards me as she finished the last button.
"Really Jake? You don't have a girlfriend? Lauren? You never with Lauren?..or anyone else?" she was obviously shocked.
I chuckled.
"Really Bells!" I laughed.
"I know...but you gotta understand." I defended..."On the rez, there's not a lot of people I'm not related to in one way or another...ya know...can't really be dating my cousins." I laughed.
" Plus, I just had shit happen in my life that makes me to be more careful, thoughtful of the subject...ya know? Besides, I don't think about girls like some guys do, like most guys do. Billy taught me to respect everything about a woman early on. Shit my sisters beat respect into me!" I huffed, doodling in the sand.
"Plus, if I do try to date the girls in town, their Dads usually have a fit. They're really prejudice. Don't want any of their daughters ending up with "half breeds".
"What!" I was horrified...my beautiful Jacob? How could anyone...Charlie surely wouldn't feel that way?
I couldn't bear the look on his face. I scooted over to where he was nervously fidgeting with his hands.
Sitting on my knees in front of him, I took his hands and our eyes met.
"Jake, I'm sorry. Things should NEVER be that way. Do you want to be with that girl and her Dad won't allow it?"
I felt like there was something haunting him that way.
"No freakin way, Bella!" he scoffed loudly. " I just never, you know, found the right person...yet" he shrugged.
"How bout you? Why not?"
Still holding his hands, I shrugged too. "Same here,never found the right person, in fact!" I laughed."I haven't had a date since 8th grade graduation! So THERE!"
Jake wrapped his arms around me pulling me onto his lap.
"What? No dates! Since we were 14? Boy you are a lost cause. " he chuckled, tickling me hard. I wiggled and squirmed and squealed with laughter till I fell onto my back.
After a couple of silent moments, he leaned over me.
"Well? what did you think?"
"About what?"
"How did you like it? You know. Kissing me and stuff." he blushed.
"Oh! That! Kissing you and STUFF." I laughed. "I suppose it was tolerable, for us inexperienced ones." I teased.
" Well, lets see if I've improved any since we last..."
I didn't wait for him to finish. I'd been watching his lips move as he spoke.
Running my fingers through his hair, I gently wrapped my hands around his neck pulling him to my mouth.
His mouth met mine still curled into his gentle laugh.
This kiss was different. It was honest, not rushed. We were tender, natural, genuine, loving. It lasted forever.
"Bella..?" he whispered against my lips.
"Yeah..." I asked, nipping his bottom lip.
"Could you get used to this?" he wondered dipping into my neck sucking passionately on my throat.
"what? kissing you?" I asked weakly.
"yeah..." he sighed
"No" I breathed against his neck, causing him to grunt and stiffen around me in protest.
"I could never get used to this amazing feeling. If you kissed me everyday, until the day I died I'd never get used to it...it would always be wonderful and tingly and amazing."
" Right answer." he smiled rolling on top of me, taking my mouth passionately as he pulled the sleeping bag tightly around us.
I shuddered slightly.
"You Okay?" he asked gently looking deep into my eyes.
"Yeah. I just feel funny...I feel like I'm home Jake. I've never felt this before."
Stroking my cheek with his warm fingers, he tucked me under his chin.
"You are home, Bells, you were never meant to leave. I promise...you are home."
He showered kisses into my hair and over my forehead, and never stopped whispering words of comfort.
We must have fallen asleep talking.