As I sat in bed that night, I peeked over the side of the bunk-bed to see Sesshomaru below me, still wide awake. He never slept until he was sure all of the other guys in the bed room were asleep. Pretective. I don't understand how anyone who was so caring for a me couldn't have any feelings of love.
I decided to ask him about it. The question had been bothering me since yesterday. I would wait until everyone else fell asleep and then I would get my chance.
Ten Minutes Later
"…Sesshomaru?" I whispered.
He let out an annoyed sigh. "…Rin, you should be asleep." he told me.
"…You aren't." I replied.
"That's not the point." he said.
"Well then, why so protective?" I asked.
"Would you rather I not do this?" he said.
"…No! I really appreciate it. I was just wondering…How do you feel about me?" I asked awkwardly.
"No answering questions at this time of night. Ask me tomorrow." he said, ignoring the question, of course.
"Sesshomaru! You know I'm not going to find a way to ask you this with all these guys awake." I pushed.
"Oh, to bad then. Well, good night.' he said, closing his eyes.
"Sesshomaru. Just answer honestly now and I'll never ask you again." I told him.
"…..I really don't know…In a way, kind of like a daughter…but different." he said.
I blinked. 'That's it?' I asked myself.
"You're not to good with words, are you Sesshomaru?" I asked.
"…Yeah well, you wanted an answer…"he said.
"Yeah. Thanks Sesshomaru. And as a daughter, I've always cared about you." I told him.
He grunted.
I knew that he hadn't been completely honest with me when he told me that he only thought of me as a daughter. As I closed my eyes, I also knew that things were going to be awkward between the two of us. I had no idea how long, but it was obvious that he needed some space, which I was willing to give him.
Tomorrow morning I woke up later then everyone else, even Sesshomaru, who I imagined had stayed up later then me. When I walked out of the shared bed room I saw all of the guys from the cell talking in a group, Sesshomaru wasn't involved. That couldn't be good. I tried to listen to the whispered conversation long enough to know what it was about. It took only a moment for me to get the gist of it: They were going to turn me in to the guard. Explain to him that I was a girl, persuading him to check my genitals and put me in the female cell. That meant no more Sesshomaru.
I didn't understand still why they would do this. It wouldn't benefit them. After a second of thinking I realized the reason. They all knew as well as I did that Sesshomaru cared for me. They considered this revenge for him not allowing them to get near me.
I needed to tell Sesshomaru about this…I wondered if he would listen…would he even care anymore?…Yeah, I knew he would. He wasn't angry at me, maybe it was just some embarrassment or awkward feelings keeping him away. I didn't know how soon they were going to tell, so I had to let Sesshomaru know about it right away. I walked next to him and waited.
"Sesshomaru…I have something I need to tell you…it's important…" I told him before continuing.
"…This isn't about what we discussed last night, is it?" he asked.
"No. It's something else." I said, quietly.
"…Go on." he said.
"I'm guessing you don't know what the guys are whispering about, do you?" I asked.
"Whisper? Are you kidding? I can hear them from over here." he told me.
"….Well then you know what they're planning?" I asked /assumed.
"Yes. But if you're planning on asking me what we should do then I'm afraid that there's nothing we can do. They're a much bigger group then us, and we are our only colleges." he explained.
"But that would mean that I would be put in the female cell!" I told, raising my voice, confused and upset.
"Indeed it does. Where you belong." He said, closing his eyes.
"But what about last time. You were able to beat up all the guys in just a few seconds, and I hardly did anything!" I told him.
"And I could do that again…if I wanted to. But you know that it only takes one man to tell the guard. The rest could continue to fight me, or merely hold me back. It wouldn't be just one fight like last time." he told me.
I looked at him carefully. He didn't look like the same Sesshomaru. He looked like he was in a trance and nothing could wake him up…he looked like he had lost his hope…Did that make me his hope?
Maybe he didn't like me like that. Either way, I had to go, because as hard as I had tried to hold it in, I felt a tear slowly fall down my cheek. I could see that it took Sesshomaru by surprise. I turned before he had time to say anything.
I had a knotting in my stomach, it made me feel like I could throw up, and as if on cue, all of the guys in the cell broke up, and I saw one of them heading for the guard.
I watched as Naraku talked to the guard and the guard looked back at me suspiciously.
He motioned for me to come and I followed, realizing that this was unavoidable.
I looked back at Sesshomaru for perhaps the last time. He didn't look sad, or anxious, he looked…dead. My eyes narrowed as I tried to understand why he was acting like this. Had what I said last night had that big of an effect on him?
The guard took me into a room behind where he normally sat, it looked like a closet or something. It was small and only contained a light switch. He turned it on and instructed me to take off my pants.
It was embarrassing considering he was watching me the entire time. When he saw my boy shorts he looked a little surprised, as if he wasn't going to believe it until he saw that I was wearing panties. I closed my eyes, ashamed, as I quickly pulled my underwear down.
He grunted, signaling me to get dressed, before taking me to the front desk and getting new papers. I waited in a large, uncomfortable chair, as he got everything together.
The process seemed longer then it did the first time we did this, maybe it was because I knew that as I got closer to finishing this, the further I would get from Sesshomaru. Perhaps, subconsciously, I just didn't want my time with Sesshomaru to end…
He motioned for me to stand up, as he waited for me to follow after him. For only a second, I contemplated running in the opposite direction, to the doors and out the building. I could escape, get a job, and maybe even pay for Sesshomaru to get out after I get enough money.
But as I stared at the man, thinking, I was brought back to reality by a mere sway of his finger, instructing me to follow him. I sighed, and unwillingly followed after him.
He brought me to a big cell, which only held about twelve women. They all looked at me strangely, most likely because of what I was wearing. They probably thought that I was some perverted guy who got a sex change some time earlier in my life so that after I got caught I could go in the female cell. Idiots.
I took a step in…it didn't feel right, as I had assumed.
It reminded me of how I entered the guys cell, the way that only one person came up to me even though everyone seemed interested.
"…Why are you dressed like that?" she asked. "Did you transfer from the male cell? Are you a guy?" she asked rudely.
"Yeah. I did transfer from the guys cell, but that doesn't make me a guy. It's a free country, so I can dress how I want." I said. "Besides, why are you dressed in all white?"
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to seem rude. You see, I find femininity in more graceful things. Like the color white." she said before giving a twirl, showing off her long white dress." I'm Kanna by the way."
"…I'm Rin." I said, forgiving her.
"So if you are a girl then why did you transfer from the guys cell?" she asked.
"The stupid guard put me in the wrong cell, he thought I was a guy." I said.
"How did you get away from all the guys?" she asked. "Well…There was this really nice guy. His name was Sesshomaru. He helped me, he fought for me, and lost a lost of sleep for my sake." I said, reminiscing in the memory.
"…Want to talk about him?" she asked.
"Yeah…I do." I said, looking up from the floor.
She seemed like an easy person to get along with. I imagined that she was very popular in the cell. She was kind and a good listener; my first impression of her had been wrong.
As I went on and on about what had happened with me and Sesshomaru, she got quite excited, laughing when something was funny, frowning when something seemed wrong or unfair, and smiling when she was eager to hear the rest of my story. I told her about Kagome and me too.
When I finished I looked at her innocent face, wondering what a girl like her could have done to be put in jail.
"….If you don't mind me asking…what did you do to end up here?" I asked, cautiously.
"Oh, I used to be a…" she paused, before looking away, embarrassed.
"…What?" I asked, concerned.
"…prostitute." she said, so quietly that only I would be able to hear.
I was confused. Why would she be a prostitute?
"I know what you thinking: Of all careers, why such a bad choice, right?" she asked.
"Well…yeah." I said, raising an eyebrow.
"You see, I was only eleven when my parents died. Any job would be illegal for me because of child labor loss laws. I figured, why not get one that pays better. That way I would have money and a place to sleep every night. It was a twisted way of thinking, and I regret it…" she said, looking distant.
"…Sorry I asked." I said, frowning.
"That's alright…Besides, on the bright side I only have three more weeks left in jail." she said, smiling widely.
This strange girl gave me a better perspective. For now things were looking up for me, and I would enjoy it while it lasted.
Two weeks later-
It seemed like I had just met Kanna a few days ago, because I had, and already it was almost time for her to go.
"It's okay Rin. I'm eighteen. When I get out, I'll get a job. After I get enough money I'll bail you out, then me and you can save our money up and we can bail Sesshomaru out too!" she encouraged.
I smiled. "Thanks Kanna. Someone like you doesn't deserve to be in jail." I said.
"Sure I do. I did something bad, this is my punishment. I kind of appreciate it. Without parents, I don't have anyone to teach me right or wrong. If it wasn't for jail, I probably would have woken up at some strangers house this morning. It's you who doesn't deserve to be in jail." she told me.
I didn't correct her, because I knew she was right. I had led a normal life, and was simply caught in a confusion.
"Rin. Rin. We have good news! We found the real murderer! You're free to go!" a police officer told me.
Kanna looked so excited that she could hardly hold it in. "Rin! Congratulations!!! I'm so happy for you." she said, jumping up and down.
"Thanks! I can't wait until you get out." I told her. "In one week I'll be waiting in the front of the building, I'll expect you out at noon or so, okay." I told her, smiling.
"Okay!" she screamed, smiling widely.
As I stepped out of the cell I thought about telling Sesshomaru that I was going to pay for him to get out, but I decided to surprise him. I would ask at the front desk how much it would cost to bail him out.
As I stepped out of the cell I saw the person who was really responsible for Kagome's death: Kikyo! I despised her. She had always hated Kagome, but I didn't know that she was bad enough to kill her. I wanted revenge, but I couldn't be put back in jail, so I walked by her, controlling myself. I saw her smirking from the corner of my eye.
I went to the front desk, and looked at the only man there. "Sir. How much would it cost to bail out a man named Sesshomaru?" I asked.
The man looked up at me from his work, then walked to another file of papers, I assumed they were Sesshomaru's.
"Well, he still has a year and a half, so considering the crime and the time he has left, It would be about…" He paused picking up a calculator. "Twenty-three thousand dollars." he told me.
"…Gosh Sesshomaru!…May I ask what he did?" I replied.
"He committed a murder back in 2005." he told me.
I couldn't breath. Why would Sesshomaru do something like that…to anyone!
"……Th…Thank you." I told the officer.
"No problem." he told me, going back to what he was doing.
As I walked out I was feeling worse then I ever had. Did I really have it in me to break out a convicted murderer?..…Of course I did! He's the same Sesshomaru I've known all this time, the only difference is that now I know more about him.
On that note, I decided to go job hunting. During my search, I found a help wanted sign at Denny's, McDonald's, and a sign advertising a woman who needed help with her house-Every day for two weeks. Paycheck varies depending on experience.
I decided to call the number and would look for other jobs while I had this one. The woman didn't pick up, it was just her answering machine. That was good enough. I told her that I had no legal experience, but was good at household chores.
That day, I decided to get applications for both Denny's and McDonald's, hoping to be accepted by both, having two jobs could help a lot.
I turned them both in after filling them out, and later got a call from the woman, she asked basic questions. She told me I could come in tomorrow.
The next I got a call from McDonald's, and the day after that I got a call from Denny's. I was working six hours at every job, and by the end of the day I only had about five or six hours to sleep. I had calculated it, and it would take about six months like this to earn the money, but with Kanna helping, if she worked as hard as me it would only take three months.
The day for Kanna's bail came soon enough, and I waited excitedly outside of the building. I felt a tap on my shoulder that made me jump, before I realized that it was Kanna.
"Rin!" she screamed, giving me a hug. I hugged her back, feeling like it had been forever since we last saw each other.
"Are you really to go job hunting?" she asked me, smiling.
"Actually, I already have three jobs, but one's just temporary." I told her.
"Three? …Okay, if you have three jobs, then I will too! I wanna be as much help as possible." she told me with a grin.
"Really! Thanks you so much Kanna! I've been wondering, since neither of us live with our parents, did you maybe want to live with me?" I asked.
"Where do you live?" she asked.
"At the house of the woman I'm helping. I asked her and she said it's okay if you live there as long as you work, but it's only for one for week, so we'll have to find a place. What do ya' say?" I asked.
"Are you kidding? Those are the best conditions I've lived under since I was eleven!" she told me.
I smiled. Now it was time to look for jobs. I wanted better jobs for her then I did for myself. She didn't even need to be helping me with this, and I couldn't put into words at the moment how much I appreciated it. The thought of seeing Sesshomaru again would keep me going.