Mai lied in bed with her hands folded across her diaphragm, staring vacantly up at the bamboo plank ceiling above her. The sun had long since risen and she had been awake for hours, but she could not find the will to get out of bed. The ebb and flow of the cheerful voices somewhere outside her window only made her want to sink deeper into the gloomy solitude of her room. The laughter of that waterbender made her hands clench sporadically; it might as well have been the screech of fingernails on slate. When had she come to hate her so?
How much time had passed, she could not say, but she suddenly became aware of the quiet that had gradually set in and the absence of any sound of life from outside. Driven by sheer curiosity, Mai finally eased her way out of bed and plodded over to the window. Nothing. There was no one in sight. They had not even cared to check on her before they had taken off somewhere. A slight pang of hurt stung her chest, but she ignored it, refusing to admit even to herself that she cared.
She creaked open her door and trudged down the hallway to the main doorway, unbolting the double doors and swinging them open. She shielded her eyes as the brilliant white light of day blinded her momentarily; It had not seemed so dark in the house, but now she realized just how little natural light actually got in. A burst of salty ocean breeze struck her face, making the breath catch in her throat, and whipped her raven hair around her face. It took her eyes a moment to adjust, but she could see that the landscape was devoid of human life, as she had suspected. She scanned the horizon once more, about to turn back inside, when a small dark shape on the shore caught her attention. Squinting and looking harder, the silhouette of the young avatar finally formed itself in her vision. Aang was sitting all alone, which she thought was odd. He was such an attention junky, always hamming it up around other people; she could not remember a time she had seen him alone. She contemplated turning back inside and letting him be, but curiosity got the better of her and she found herself making her way down the rigid stone stairway along the slope to the shore.
She called out to him, but her words were lost to the wind, taken hostage and carried away. She waited to speak again until she had nearly come up behind him. Aang was sitting on the wet sand, hugging his knees to his chest. He looked deep in thought and possibly troubled. She did not want to startle him so she simply said, "Hey."
He only turned his head halfway around to acknowledge that he had heard her and then returned to his previous position. After a moment, he responded listlessly, "Hey."
"What are you doing out here by yourself?" When he did not respond right away, she thought she should shift her tactic a bit. "Where is everyone?"
Aang shrugged lethargically. "Some of them said something about going somewhere... I don't know, I wasn't really listening."
"Oh," she said, not knowing how to respond. He was clearly not his usual upbeat self. "Well, do you know where Zuko went?"
"I don't know, maybe you should ask Katara." His tone was unusually cutting and sarcastic. His response made her stomach churn with a familiar feeling, one she had experienced frequently as of late.
"What do you mean?" she asked with a bitter hesitancy in her voice.
"I think you know what I mean. You must have noticed the way they've been acting, how much more time they've been spending together over the last few months. And sometimes the way they look at each other – and it's not just a glance, but something meaningful, like there's a secret they're sharing." Aang sighed. "Am I just reading into things? Maybe I'm just being a jealous boyfriend; she's allowed to have other friends who are guys. Am I being ridiculous?"
Mai did not respond right away, but sat down next to him. A seagull swooped overhead toward the glistening waves, screeching as it circled once or twice and then dived down to emerge with a silvery fish slapping in its beak. It flew away with a gloating confidence to enjoy its deftly obtained meal.
"You're not being ridiculous," Mai finally uttered after what seemed like a long silence. "I've picked up on it too, since a while ago actually. At times I also thought that I was just being jealous. But then last night, when I said I was going to bed – I wasn't actually tired. I had seen the two of them looking over at each other all evening. I'm sure Zuko thought I didn't notice it, but I did. And then what Toph said about Katara being distracted and not watching the fireworks, that just put me over the edge. She had noticed it too and I couldn't take it anymore."
Aang hesitated a moment, ingesting what Mai had just disclosed. Why had he not noticed that? "There was something that Toph said last night, after you had gone, that bothered me too. We were playing the game 'Never Have I Ever' and we were all a little drunk." He blushed and smiled embarrassedly at her quizzical expression. "It was her turn and she looked directly at Katara and said, 'I've never had feelings for two people at once.' Sokka seemed to think she meant Jet and Haru, and maybe she did." He looked over at Mai, hoping to get some kind of reassurance, but was only met with a doubtful air that seemed to say Yeah, right. He frowned and continued. "But if she was referring to what I'm afraid she was, then all my suspicions are confirmed."
Mai was silent for several moments, staring out over the sea, her brows furrowed in jaded vexation. As difficult as it was to stomach, she knew that she could not keep making excuses for Zuko's behavior or accepting his lukewarm denials of her suspicions. She finally had to admit that it really was as bad as she had feared.
"I'm sorry you're going through this too, Aang," she finally said as she rose to a standing position, her hands on her hips, still staring out toward the horizon. She turned to walk in the opposite direction as Aang's voice rang out.
"Wait, where are you going?"
"I'm going to find Zuko. I'm gonna confront him with everything I know and give him one more chance to come clean and explain his side. That way if we do end it, at least my conscience can rest knowing I did what I could."
End it? Aang thought. He suddenly felt as though someone had kicked him in the gut; he had not thought it would ever actually escalate to that. Could Katara really have substantial feelings for Zuko? Or worse, could it have gone farther than he had realized – was she all-out cheating on him behind his back? His head was clouded and spinning and he felt his avatar state creeping upon him. No, I'm not going to react this way. He had excelled at controlling his avatar state since his duel with the former Firelord. He relaxed his body, closed his eyes, and slowly breathed in deeply through his nose, exhaling slowly through his mouth. He repeated this process a few more times until he felt his encroaching avatar state subside.
Aang opened his eyes again. The afternoon sun was creeping across the sky, weaving its way in and out of billowy white clouds. He realized that it was probably past time for lunch, but his appetite eluded him. He reclined his back flat on the sand, letting his arms fall straight out to the sides, and looked up at the sky, seeing a couple of birds flitting high above in a whimsical dance. To be so carefree, he thought.
.:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:.
"Where are we going?" asked Katara, trailing closely behind Zuko along the green hills behind the beach house. The tall grass nipped and tickled her legs as she swept through it, the sea wind brushing the hair down around her neck.
"To a place I used to go a lot as a kid. I haven't been there in years. Azula and I used to play there when we were young, back when my family was still happy. And later, when my parents started arguing more, I'd go there to get away from it."
"That's kind of sad."
"I guess so. The funny thing is when I think of that place, I don't feel sad. I guess it's because the peace and quiet comforted me and made me feel safe. It made me feel hidden, like no one would find me. Plus there's something kinda special about it that I want you to see." He turned around and smiled, extending his hand to help her down a sudden slope. "We're almost there now." He pointed to a rock formation that jutted from the lush hillside of the island. It was much smaller than most of the other rock formations she had noticed surrounding the beach house. She had not seen it before; it was barely noticeable from the house due to the hilly landscape.
They arrived at the rocky structure which Katara realized was in fact the mouth of a cave. Zuko held out his hand to her. "It gets a little dark inside, I don't want you to trip on the jagged floor." Katara smiled, looking a little leery. "Don't worry we won't be going far," he reassured her. She nodded and let him lead her inside.
As they entered, Katara noticed that the floor of the cave began to descend quite steeply. They were actually trekking below ground. The thought gave her a kind of strange excitement. She understood what Zuko had meant; it really did feel like she was hidden and safe.
Suddenly he stopped, standing motionless for a moment as though he were waiting for something, and then relaxed and let her hand drop from his gently. "Yep, this is it," he said with a satisfied smile.
Katara looked around to examine their surroundings, blinking away the darkness. A soft white glow from up above where they had entered was the only source of light in the cavern. Once her eyes adjusted, she was taken aback to discover the surprisingly large size of the cave. It was separated into chambers of a sort by towering, naturally formed rock pillars, and the chamber in which they stood was easily the size of a small Earth Kingdom cathedral, probably three stories high. She could see that as the cavern continued into darkness, the chambers grew ever taller and more massive. The stone walls shimmered like draperies around them, reflecting the light from above, and her eyes caught the glisten of an occasional crystal-clear pool of water. It was a subterranean wonderland like she had never seen.
"It's really something, isn't it?"
"It's amazing," Katara muttered, nearly speechless.
"Well that's not all," declared Zuko with an eager smile. He took her hand and led her to a rocky ledge that protruded from the wall, sitting them both down. "If you are really quiet and you listen really closely," he went on, his hand still resting on hers, "you can hear the cavern rocks sing." Katara blushed deeply as she became agonizingly aware that he had no intention of removing his hand from hers. She cast him a feigned skeptical look at his story in an attempt to playfully mask her racing heart. "Really," he elaborated. "When the wind currents rush through chasms and holes in the rocks, it creates a symphony of unique and beautiful tones that resonate throughout the chambers in harmony. But sometimes you have to listen for a little while before you hear it."
Zuko wrapped his hand around hers just so slightly that she could have convinced herself that she had imagined it. But when she turned to look at him straight on, his expression told her it had not been her imagination. He was looking at her with a deeper, more earnest look than he had before. Her heart was beating so fast she thought it might burst from her chest.
"Katara," he began, making no attempt to hide the new solemnity in his voice, "there's another reason I wanted to bring you here. There's something I've been wanting to talk to you about. Something I've wanted to say to you for a while, but I didn't think I could before." He faltered then, averting his eyes in nervousness. Katara was certain she knew what he wanted to say; she had been feeling it too, but had been trying to brush it off as something else. She wanted to tell him, to get the load off her chest, but she was not sure she had the courage. Part of it was guilt. How could she do this to Aang behind his back without at least first being honest with him about her feelings? She at least owed him that much. But there she sat with Zuko, who was still holding her hand in his and attempting to bare his soul to her. In spite of everything she knew was right, she suddenly found herself reaching her free hand up to him and tenderly turning his face so that he was looking at her again. Zuko's golden eyes pierced her soul as he gazed into hers. He inched closer to her and closed the small gap between their bodies; his face was mere inches away from hers now. The butterflies that had returned to flutter recklessly inside her were interrupted by a haunting hum resounding within the cave. It was soon joined by another and then another humming, until a full chorus echoed in harmony around them.
"They really are singing!" Katara smiled widely at Zuko, whose expression seemed to say teasingly, I told you so. Their eyes lingered together for a long moment, their separate smiles melting into the same intense gaze. Zuko leaned forward slightly and ever so slowly, not wanting to make the wrong move. Katara understood and leaned in toward him a little, encouraging him but too nervous to close the whole distance herself. That was all the reassurance he needed. Slowly yet earnestly, he closed the gap between them and softly locked his lips onto hers. A bolt of electricity shot through Katara's body as Zuko's lips connected with her own, and the sensation caused her to inhale in pleasure. He placed his free hand on her shoulder and pulled her closer to him, deepening the kiss. Katara gently cupped his face, caressing the tough skin of his scar with her fingertips. She had been the only person he had ever allowed to touch his scar, and that had only deepened the connection between them.
This was all so different from the way she had felt whenever Aang kissed her. It had been nice, but that's all it had been – nice. It had lacked the passion she had craved from a man who was in love with her and she with him. And it certainly never made her feel like this. She suddenly realized that his was how a kiss was supposed to feel – she had never felt this way with Aang because her heart never really belonged to him, not in the way he wanted it to.
Zuko finally softened the kiss and slowly released his lips from hers. His eyes still closed, he exhaled passionately as he rested his forehead against hers. The hand that had been on her shoulder, pulling her in, relaxed and slid down to rest gently on her forearm. Katara wished the moment would never end; the way he held her so close to him, so passionately yet so tenderly, was like water to her thirsty heart, what she had been craving for so long. He leaned back slightly so that his eyes locked with hers. Brushing back a stray hair that had fallen around her face, he smiled faintly as he spoke in a scarcely audible whisper, "Katara…"
.:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:.
Mai trudged along the rolling landscape, arms crossed across her ribcage, her long dress swishing repetitively against the tall grass. Occasionally she could hear the whirr of a grasshopper as it flew up from the grass around her to escape her path.
Moments ago she had been on her way to the city district in hopes of finding Zuko. She could only assume he had gone into town with the others, as they seemed to have all disappeared in unison. But no sooner had she left Aang on the shore and reached the top of the stone pathway at the house before she ran into Sokka, Suki, and Toph arriving back. They had been engaged in a game of beach volleyball all afternoon, and when asked if Zuko and Katara had been with them, they told her it had just been the three of them and that they had not seen them since they left. Mai's stomach churned, but she hid all revealing signs of emotion as she thanked them, and then proceeded to walk in the opposite direction from town. There was only one place she could think of that Zuko might go if he wanted to be alone – or not so alone as it seemed; the thought made her blood boil as she clenched her fists involuntarily, her fingernails digging into the palms of her hands. All she could think of was that she hoped she was wrong about her assumption; sometimes she hated being right, and those always seemed to be the times she was most likely to be.
It had been years since she had walked the hills of this green paradise behind the beach house. She had often accompanied Zuko and his family on their vacations back when things were happier and less complicated. She had spent many summers strolling hand in hand along the undulating landscape with Zuko. That seemed like ages ago now, like a different life almost. The tapestry of those days had been unraveled and woven back together haphazardly, transformed into an image she no longer recognized. How had things gone so wrong?
Just when she started to think that perhaps she did not remember the hills as well as she had thought and began considering retracing her steps, the familiar jagged rocks that formed the old cavern entrance came into view. Just seeing it caused a wave of various emotions to wash over her simultaneously as she trekked closer to the mouth of the cave. She hesitated momentarily just before the opening, halting to listen for any audible voices. Hearing nothing, she treaded softly to the entrance, keeping her weight on her toes, and began descending down the ragged rocks into the dimness of the cave. She moved lithely and silently, as gracefully and nimbly as a leopardfox, taking her time to let her eyes adjust to the lack of light. And that was when she felt her heart stop mid-beat.
Despite the dimness, she was able to make out the forms of two vastly familiar figures against the wall a short distance below her. Shielding her eyes from any back light from outside, she could see unmistakably what she had feared would be confirmed. Her breath caught in her throat as the image of her backstabbing fiancé kissing that water wench seared her retinas. She felt the urge to cry, scream, laugh, and vomit simultaneously. But all that managed to escape her was a cynical, "I knew it."
.:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:. .:.
As he looked into Katara's eyes and whispered her name, a slight movement toward the entrance of the cave caught Zuko's attention, but before his eyes had time to focus he heard an all too familiar voice echo against the walls.
"I knew it." Katara gasped at the unexpected voice and turned to see Mai quivering with palpable fury. Zuko jumped up from his sitting position into a stance that looked like a cross between a sabertooth mooselion on the defensive and a gazellerabbit that was about to flee for his life.
"I knew it! How could you betray me like this, Zuko?"
"Mai, wait! Please!" He held his arm out to her pleadingly as she turned and made her way toward the exit. Katara followed a safe distance behind, hugging her arms around herself insecurely. "I was going to tell you. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to keep it from you."
Zuko nearly lost his footing as she suddenly whipped around, pointing an accusing finger at him vehemently. "I even gave you a chance to admit it, more than once! But you weren't even man enough to come clean. I was actually coming to find you to give you one last chance to tell me the truth. If you think you two have been discreet, you are sadly mistaken." She shot a momentary glare at Katara that made the waterbender's blood run cold, and then shifted her eyes back to Zuko. "You thought I didn't know, but I have known! I just didn't have the proof to confront you with. Well now I can see that you never would have told me on your own!"
Mai reached the top of the rocky incline and disappeared into the pale white daylight. Zuko and Katara scrambled up the uneven floor after her, exiting the cave into the blinding sunlight and squinting painfully as their dilated pupils constricted suddenly.
"Mai!" Zuko called out to her despairingly. "I'm sorry! You're wrong, I was going to tell you." He realized how pathetic he sounded saying that after the fact, and he cursed himself inwardly. But his words were muddled by the wind and even if she had heard him, he knew it would have made no difference. She was already a good distance across the hillside, walking briskly, her arms crossed across her chest as usual. She never even glanced back.