It was the night of the party they had been looking forward to for months, and Phil was ill. Not just a few sniffles, but full-blown cold sweats, high temperature, constant-sneezing flu. Dan had been looking after him all day, bringing soup in while wearing a surgical mask to make Phil laugh. Unfortunately, while laughter may be the best medicine, it didn't seem to be very fast working as afternoon slipped into evening. Dan stood at the end of the bed and began the argument for the zillionth time that the party didn't matter and he should stay to look after Phil. And once again, Phil managed to convince him that he would be fine tucked up in bed watching TV. It was important to the people sponsoring the party that at least one of them made an appearance, or it would reflect badly on their agency. Dan still felt bad as he got ready and came back into the room to find Buffy curled up on the bed beside Phil, and a box of tissues on the other side. He leaned over and gave him a tight squeeze, kissing his burning forehead gently.

'You know, I love you, even when you're all snotty and disgusting, even when kissing you is a sure-fire way to catch the lurgy.' Dan murmured in Phil's ear. 'If anyone was going to make me ill, I'd prefer it to be you.'

Phil giggled and playfully shoved him off. 'Come on, get moving, or you'll be late!'

'And that would be so unlike me.' Dan smirked, but he picked his jacket up and blew a kiss back before leaving the room. The taxi was already waiting, and Dan climbed in, feeling suddenly very lonely. Since they had been together, they didn't really do things alone. They were either 'Dan and Phil' the internet duo, or Dan and Phil, the couple. The latter only to their families and close friends, for many reasons but mostly involving having some semblance of a private life. In situations like parties, he liked having Phil's comforting presence around to remind him that it wasn't so bad and they could both fail at small talk together. At least tonight there should be some other youtubers there who he knew so that he wasn't standing alone all night in a corner, awkwardly clutching a drink.

A couple of hours later, Dan was alone at the bar, staring into the bottom of some fruity cocktail he didn't care to remember the name of. The other people he knew, all three of them, had only stayed long enough to show their face to everyone who mattered and have a couple of drinks before leaving. He wasn't even sure why he had stayed so long himself. But to be honest, what else was he going to do, go home and go to bed? Maybe it was the warm buzz spreading through his body from the cocktails, or the muscular blond eyeing him up from the dancefloor, which had kept him anchored in his seat. Dan stopped himself in that thought and reminded himself of poor Phil, tucked up in bed feeling like death with only a dog to keep him company. But Dan hadn't had attention like this from a stranger in a long time, and … it felt good.

'It's all in your head, he's not really interested, he's probably looking at someone else.' Dan told himself firmly, looking back down at his empty glass and debating whether to get another drink or leave. He knew the sensible option…

'Hey.' A voice spoke from his left, and Dan jumped a little in his seat. He turned to find himself looking into the hazel eyes which had been locked onto him a few minutes earlier.

'Uh… hi' Dan's voice didn't seem to want to cooperate after not speaking for a while. Come on you idiot, stop acting like a schoolgirl with a crush.

'Can I get you a drink?' The guy asked, leaning against the counter with his whole body facing Dan, who was trying desperately to keep his eyes from wandering.

'Um… I… I don't...' Dan stuttered, a voice in the back of his head trying to drown out his resolution of going home with thoughts of this guy pressed close, moaning into his ear. Jesus, get it together, you're not a horny teenager.

The man put his hands up in mock surrender and grinned.
'Hey, no pressure, it's just a drink.' He clarified. 'I just thought you looked like you could use one. This party not your scene?'

'Oh, um, yeah sure. My name's Dan, by the way. And yeah, my, um, friend was supposed to come but he was ill so…' Dan turned to face the guy.

After a couple of cocktails with Ryan, Dan found himself offloading to his new friend about the monotony of his life with Phil. Even though they were still in love, Dan was getting a little bored with the same old routines. Every Sunday they took their dog for a walk in the park, had a date night once a week, spent Christmas with Phil's family and New Year's at Dan's. He just never expected to settle down so early. And now, they were trying to start a family but applying to adopt was hard. It seemed like there were just continuous loops to jump through, meetings to attend, and forms to sign. Dan was beginning to wonder how anyone ever got adopted after all this work. And in the back of his mind, he was starting to regret agreeing to it. He knew it was going to make Phil so happy, but he was already questioning whether all this hard work was worth it to have a child.

'Wow.' Ryan said, as Dan trailed off and bit his lip. 'Sounds like we need some shots over here.' He signalled the bartender.

'Oh, no, Phil says that shots make me a little crazy.' Dan half-heartedly objected, watching the little glasses fill up before his eyes.

Ryan leaned closer, a little off balance, and said in a conspiring tone, 'Isn't that what tonight is about? Getting a little crazy?'

Dan didn't recognise any of the music, he hadn't been out in so long. Before he met Phil he had loved going to clubs, but now most of their social life was playing board games with other couples. It was fun with Phil, but there wasn't the same energy, the same carelessness that made Dan feel so alive. Even now, with Ryan's strong body pressed against him in the middle of the crowd of writhing bodies, only half of Dan's mind was on Phil. And that half was very quickly disappearing as the alcohol worked its way into his system and Ryan's lips made contact with his own. After a few mere moments of making out, Dan pulled away, disgusted with himself and pushed his way out of the crowd. He found himself panting in an empty bathroom, splashing cold water on his face to snap himself out of it. This was bad, this was so bad, what if someone saw? What if someone he knew saw what he just did? He scrunched his eyes shut and muttered curse words under his breath.

The bathroom door slammed closed, and Dan jumped, looking up in surprise. Ryan was standing just feet away, his breathing heavy and his eyes lustful. Dan prayed that he wouldn't come any closer, not trusting himself to be able to resist. His heart was thumping in his chest. He needed to be touched, to be close to someone, to be desired.

Ryan closed the distance in just two short steps, and pushed Dan against the wall. He pinned Dan's hand above his head and leaned close to murmur in his ear.

"Don't fight it. You want me. I want you." Ryan's lips kissed a trail from his cheek down to his neck, and then went back to his ear. "I want you. Tonight. Be mine tonight."

"I can't… I shouldn't…" Dan stuttered, trying to bring an image of Phil into his mind to ward off temptation. "I want to… but my boyfriend… but I want it…" He moaned.

Ryan pressed his forehead against Dan's, his warm breath smelled of beer but Dan didn't even care.

"He'll never find out. Just one night, no last names, no numbers, no strings attached. One night." Ryan slid his hand down Dan's chest to rest just above his jeans. "Forget about him, tonight, and do what you want. Do you want me?"

"Yes." Dan breathed, biting his lip. "I want you."

"Then let's go." Ryan grabbed his hand and led him out of the bathroom, through the club packed with people, and out into the cool night.