Chapter 2

Megan paced the floor. She had wanted so much to meet Phillip, to be able to talk to him...and now that he said he wanted to meet her, she was scared.

What could she say to him? How could she explain? All the rehearsed speeches sounded so hollow..

Steadying her hands, she dialed the sheriff's office.

"George" she said into the phone "I'm going to see Phillip."

"Good for you."

"I need someone to,...to be with me."

"And you want me to be it?"

"Would you? I need somebody's arm around my shoulder."

George considered the situation before speaking.

"Why not call Barnabas?"

"Barnabas?"

"He's got a right to hear about it, too. As much right as Phillip. You know how that thing hurt him."

"George"

"I'm not judging you. But I think he should know about it."

"I know you are right."

"But it doesn't hurt less because of it, eh? Look you have to get it over. It is going to be hard, but it's got to be done."

"I...I'm afraid."

"I think that some Dutch courage is what you need."

"Damn you! Why do you have to be so practical? Why do I have to be? Why can't I just sit on the floor and cry until you come take care of me?"

"Don't we all wish we could do something like that?"

Megan hung up, then following George's advice, she poured herself some brandy which she mixed with dried blood to have it go down easily.

Somewhat steadier, she called Barnabas.

'Yes, Megan, what is it?" Barnabas answered distractedly while still leafing through a folder."

"I'm going to see Phillip. I want you to come with me."

"Now?" when would he get the time to catch up?"

"Please, come. It's important. I wouldn't ask for it if wasn't..."

"All right. I'll be there. You'll have to wait for me. I am grounded now."

"I know, I will pick you up in my car."

Not much later Barnabas sat on the passenger seat watching how Megan's hands trembled as she held the wheel.

"Are you all right?"

"Don't make me talk about it, please "she said softly "I will tell you and Phillip all about it. But not now."

"Wouldn't you rather have me drive?"

"I am not going to crash if that's worrying you."

Delia Harding saw both of them come along the corridor. It seemed as if Megan was slackening her pace, and only the fact that Barnabas held her arm kept her going.

"I guess I'd better leave you alone" Delia said.

Megan nodded. Somehow she seemed to have trouble forming words.

Barnabas answered for her. "That would be most kind, Miss Harding."

As he opened the door for Megan, Barnabas wondered briefly why Nurse Harding's neck wounds took so long to heal. But that thought left him quickly as he watched Megan and Phillip.

"Megan" Phillip extended his hand awkwardly. "I haven't seen you since..."

"You are just giving me your hand" Megan said in a strangled voice "No more embracing for the two of us."

"I...I'm sorry."

"Can't blame you. After all, it's been nine years ago. So much has happened since then."

She walked to the window and looked out into the yard. She felt weak and tired. But she forced herself to speak.

"Do you know how it is with me now? Do you know what I have to thank Jeb Hawkes for? Everybody in town knows that I am a nymphomaniac. Do you think I wanted that?"

'Jeb..." suddenly Barnabas understood.

"He had the idea that I would be easier to control if I had this hunger in me. A hunger that only he could satisfy." she turned to Phillip "You suspected that we were lovers...Lovers!" she laughed "That wasn't love. I had a hunger and he...he though it was funny the way I crawled to him for relief. So did Nicholas and Sky Rumsen when he loaned me to them. Rumsen didn't tell you that, Barnabas? When he came to you crying that I had hurt him? Well, I had a right to. He was sly even then. I made him sign checks in my name.

I wanted to take as much money from him as I could. But he postdated the checks, and hoped that I would get killed before I could cash them... But it was him that died, and I was left with a lot of useless checks."

Megan stopped, trying to stop her mounting hysteria.

"About you and me" she looked at Barnabas "about what happened, it was as much my fault as it was yours. I wanted you to...to have sex with me. But I was too ashamed to ask for it. Because of Jeb...And because I could not say it, and could not stop going to you, you went too far, and now Phillip is afraid of me touching him."

"Megan" Phillip managed to make his voice calm. He wanted to say something by couldn't well figure what. "Megan" he repeated.

She moved towards the bed.

"It is too much for you, isn't it? You'd rather I wasn't here?"

She realized her eyes were moist. God! She hadn't cried since...since she had been told that Phillip was dead, and it was her fault.

"Please, don't cry" Phillip managed to say.

Megan sat on the bed, looking away from Phillip. Making sure she didn't touch him in any way.

"I will give you a divorce. There is no way that you and I can stay married. I need a different man every night...There are many women in town who could make you a good wife " her voice broke

Barnabas started to move, then realized that it was not up to him, but to Phillip to say or do anything.

He did. Slowly he let his hand rest on Megan's shoulder.

"Megan...I don't know what to say. I don't hate you. I don't despise you. I like you..."

"But you don't love me anymore?"

"I'm not sure. I'm confused. I have no memory of what went on between 1970 and now. I don't know what I did. I want to...to get a grip on myself...It hurts me to see you cry."

Megan turned, and buried her face on Phillip's chest.

Barnabas decided it was best for him to disappear and leave them to straighten their differences.

As he went down to the waiting room he saw Chris near the door.

"Chris! What are you doing here? I thought that you were out."

"I am. Both me and Amy. But Sabrina's still in. She doesn't want to follow doctor's orders. How's your shoulder?"

Barnabas winced. "Better, but it still hurts."

"Good, that will teach you to mess around with my sister." Chris gave him a genuinely cordial smile as he said this.

"Oh, Chris. I'm so sorry. I must have been crazy..."

"I know. I didn't react any better than you did when I found out. But since David wasn't around we were spared the slaughter. God, when you think of it... Heroin. Smack, Horse... Even the words hurt."

"How's Amy doing?"

"Quite well. She's living with me now. And the sheriff finally stopped coming to pick her brain. I know...I know... that was the bargain we struck to keep Amy out of jail. But I still don't like the idea of him using my sister to advance his career."

"Now that Julia's coming back, it might be a good idea to let her talk to Amy."

"Are you saying that Amy's crazy?" Chris said harshly.

"Chris, you don't need to be crazy to need a psychiatrist..

"Why else would you need one?

"I' see one if I was depressed. Or if I felt hurt. Or if I had just kicked a drug habit and wanted to stay clean..."

Chris growled, unconvinced.

"Anyway, as soon as Julia gets here I'll ask her to do something about David."

It took some will power for Chris not to say that David should be fed to the sharks.

"Well, speaking of something else, how's that factory coming along?"

"Stalled" Barnabas sighed "I shouldn't blame Willie for it. But he was so eager to bring any kind of business here that he didn't notice that their labor practices were atrocious. I guess I'll aver to start from scratch again. How about you?

"I am quitting the business."

"What does Sabrina say?

"She likes the idea." Chris lied. "I was more of a fifth wheel there, anyway."

"But why do you want to quit?"

"It was a dirty business. I decided it was time to get an honest job."

"You want mine?" Barnabas asked too quickly.

"You don't like it?"

"There is more to live than just shuffling papers. At least there should be," Barnabas sighed. "the paperwork is more in control now, thanks to Frank. But if I could figure out a better way to earn a living, I'd quit."

"Hey! Why don't the two of us go into business together?"

"What kind of business?"

"Raising worms."

"Worms! Why should anyone raise worms?"

"To sell to anglers, farmers, dog food companies, hamburger chains..."

"You mean they put worms in hamburgers? Ugh..."

"What you do care? You don't eat at those places. And it is all protein. It probably has more vitamins and minerals, and less cholesterol."

Barnabas shoot his head, not convinced.

"What do you say? We could put them in your cellar..."

"No, Chris. Thanks, but no."

"Why?" Chris was hurt.

"Much too risky. I cannot quit my job like that. The truth is that there are too few openings for someone who can't keep a nine-to-five schedule." He saw Chris' objecting and forestalled it. "I know that you don't intend to go bankrupt, but it might happen. Funny, isn't it? Never worried about money before. Never had to. As Joshua Collins' son I could always count on my bills being paid, no matter what. And later...later is wasn't much of a problem until Willie finally told me that the free ride was over. And I still don't know how to make a proper budget and live within in...Chris, if I could afford to, I'd invest in your worms, you know that.

Megan clung to Phillip. She let the warmth of his body reach her. He still smelled the same, she noticed. That particular Phillip smell that she thought she'd never meet again. His skin felt familiar. Her fingertips recognized the texture as they moved over it.

She rubbed her face against his chest. Before she realized it, she was inching towards his throat. Her lips just parted, and she never knew when her fangs pierced his flesh.