A/N: this chapter is kinda rushed because I need to get this one update as frequently as I can. Warnings can be found in the first chapter, Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I did not own hetalia

-xxXxx-

It's my will with all my might

To stay strong, put up a fight

I'm so lost but not afraid

I've been broken

I'll rise again

(On My Own, yutaka yamada)

-xxXxx-

"I'm not giving him to you!"

I woke up realizing that I'm in hospital and that's my older brother voice out there.

"Calm down, kid. Listen to his reasons. He got a point there-"

My head is so fucking hurts, what happened?

"I'm sorry but I need you to step aside Uncle Sadik, no matter what his intention are, I'm not giving Lovino to him."

I wonder if they know that I'm listening to their every words. They were loud as hungry monkey could be. Don't they realize that hospital do not tolerate to loud noise? I wonder how loud it will be if I was standing there? Were they arguing?

If only I was not stuck on this bed, I would go out and shut them up myself.

"So, you're saying that you don't mind if these kind of things happened again? You know how close we are to lose him today, I'm not gonna let that kid out of my sight anymore" that's new voice, it laced with Italian accent. Just like me and mamma.

"think about it, I can afford all his medical expense, provide him with whatever he need, and all the Vargas household will be there to monitor him. He needs me." The voice continued to argue.

"he needs you? Don't make me laugh old man, your son left us!!"

Wow. I never know fratello could shout like that.

"he left me, mamma and Lovino years ago just to married to another woman! Where were you when my mamma had to works herself day and night to raised me and Lovino? Where were you when I had to lie to Lovino that your son was somewhere else and not abandoning him? Do you ever understand what kind of hell that we've been going through?" the voice cracks.

Fratello needs me…I can hear in his voice…he is going to break,

Its sounds like those night when he crying by himself when mamma was not at home, when he thought that nobody was listening.

"Do you ever understand of what your son do to me? I had to pick myself up when I tripped and fall, I had to hold all the tears to myself so mamma would not have to worry about me grow up fatherless, I had to learned how to be independent so mamma would worry less about me"

I need to get up from this bed, my fratello should never cry. He needs some one to wipe his tears. I had to be the one…I was the only one…

Come' on Lovino move, just pull this strange tubes out from your hands and get out there.

'Shhh, Lovi.'

Mamma?

I turned to my left only to find my mamma smiling at me. She caressing my hair softly, her right hand cupped my cheeks lovingly. She turned her head towards the door and look at it solemnly.

'I was not a good mother aren't I?' she lowered her gaze.

Mamma?

'if only I knew, surely I would done my best to prevent that happened...'

She is here?

I can hear soft gasp from the outside. I look at the white door, wondering is anything going to happened.

"what are you doing?! Get up, Mr.Vargas!" a desperate voice belong to my uncle rang.

"I'm sorry, for whatever my sons done. My sons is irresponsible and it is my job to fix whatever he ever done. Let me take care of Lovino and you. I will give him whatever my son not able to give you back then. Let me…let the Vargas be your family. Come with us. We will take care of you." I can sense the sincerity in his words.

For a moment, I hear no voice.

"I…I will never be part of your family…go away"

No, its feel so wrong…my fratello never sound that sad. He never sound so lost.

He needs help.

I...I need help.

'Lovi?'

No mamma, stop. Don't call me Lovi anymore, please.

Despite my body feels so heavy, I forced it to move. I need to get out there.

No more crying

No more running

No more

Stop it

If I want to help fratello, I need to get help for myself

I throw myself off the bed.

'Lovi?!'

Please, stop. If this continue, fratello will cry again

I need to go there to his side, my fratello needs me.

My hands began to crawl, even though my feet refused to move.

'What's wrong bambino?! Tell mamma!'

Everything mamma, all of it. If I stay like this, nothing will change. There will always be some one who end up hurt, cry and depressed.

I crawl to the door and bang it with all my might.

I can hear their footstep getting closer to me before the door slide harshly and reveal three panic of familiar face. Heh, they looks so ridiculous.

"LOVINO?!"

Help me...

.

Heal me.

-xxXxx-

Correct me if I'm wrong:-

Fratello-brother

Bambino-son

A/N: Romano's older brother is so ooc in this chapter, but I need to get the message out to you readers so…can you guess who is he? I thought of using the term of 'older brother' in the personification who is going to be Romano's brother language at first, but then I thought that would be dead give-away of the identity, so…meh. Not now.