Chapter Two
Freedom

For the first time in longer than I could remember, I lay down in a real bed, with real pillows and soft sheets, welcoming the feel of the smooth percale against my skin. Sheets in prison are like sandpaper, stiff and scratchy, over laundered with harsh chemicals, scented heavy with bleach. The pillows, when they let me have one, were heavy and hard, and offered no comfort at all. These pillows were different, almost foreign to me, and someone had scented them with lavender. Selphie, no doubt.

I thought I'd pass out as soon as my head hit the pillow, but I was mistaken. It was too quiet. The bed was too soft. My head was too full of thoughts about the coming days. I didn't sleep at all, I just lay there thinking and listening to the absolute silence around me.

The more I thought about it, the more uncertain I became that I'd be able to do what they'd asked of me. I badly wanted this freedom to last, but I didn't know if I had it in me to go along with it. I'll admit, I was scared. Scared because after just a little taste of the stuff, I'd already started to adapt. I relished it. I liked having my own rooms, and I loved that I'd been given a second chance, and I sincerely wanted things to work out. However, if they didn't, I'd rather die than go back to prison. That was fact.

Eventually, I got up around four, my mind still full of doubts, and put on a pot of coffee. I drank a cup, got the jitters from not being allowed caffeine in three years and then started to feel like I was going to climb the walls. I needed to get out of there and decided to sneak in some training time before everyone else was up.

Early mornings had always been prime time for the training center. Usually, it was empty, which had always meant that I'd been free to fight and do as I pleased. I figured nothing had changed, and set off for the TC, gunblade in hand, prepared to find out just how much work I had ahead of me. After all, it had been three years. Not that I didn't do some fighting in prison, but that was different. In prison, I didn't have the benefit of a weapon, just my fists.

To my surprise, Squall was already in the Training Center, fighting a holographic G-Army elite. I watched in silence, envious of his speed and skill with the blade. I had no doubt, at this point, that Squall Leonhart would be able to beat the crap out of me, without breaking a sweat. Three years behind bars had left me out of shape and out of practice, though I'd spent my half hour of exercise time every day lifting weights at the gym. It may have given me a nice physique, but as far as endurance, I had little to none left.

The Hologram fell and Squall sheathed his blade, looking satisfied but not at all cocky about it. Which was typical. He'd never been the sort to gloat over a victory. Even when he'd beat me during all the sorceress stuff, he'd never rubbed it in. Instead, he'd pleaded with me to back down.

If I'd been smart, I would have listened. Maybe things would have turned out differently.

But, it was over and done with, and there was no room for coulda, woulda, shoulda. I made my choices. I was going to have to live with them.

He must have sensed me behind him, because he turned and gave me an nod of acknowledgement.

"Morning," he said.

I gave him a little salute and stepped forward, taking in the changes he'd made to the Training Center.

"Holographic enemies, hunh?" I asked.

"Cheaper and easier to maintain than the real thing. Bigger variety, too," Squall explained. "Plus, the program only levels up when you do, so there aren't any surprises."

"No more being ambushed by the T-Rexaur?" I asked, amused.

"Not unless you're ready for it."

"That's cool," I said with a nod. I was anxious to fight something, what with my first cup of coffee in three years coursing it's way through my system. Not to mention, three years of anxiety and pent up guilt to burn off.

Squall looked at me and gave me a level but unreadable stare. Even after all this time, I still couldn't tell what he was thinking. Kind of unnerving, even for a tough guy like me.

"How about it, Seifer?" Squall finally asked, lifting his blade a bit. "For old time's sake?"

I wasn't sure if he was being cocky because he knew he'd beat me, or if he just wanted to test my skills. Either way, I didn't have it in me to back down from the challenge, even if I knew I'd lose.

"You're on."

"Live battle mode," Squall said to the holograph system.

"Engaging live battle. User one, rank A SeeD Commander Squall Leonhart, level ninety-nine. User two, rank twelve Instructor in Training, Seifer Almasy. Level twenty-seven," came the disembodied voice of a computer. "System indicates users are not compatible. Continuing in live battle mode may result in injury or death. Do you wish to proceed?"

"Yes," Squall said.

I was disappointed that it had ranked me at level twenty seven. I'd hoped for a lot more than that, like, somewhere around fifty, but I kept my silence.

"Ready?" he asked.

I nodded and lifted my blade, which felt heavy in my hand all of a sudden. His blade crashed against mine and the battle was on.

I'd like to say that I kicked the crap out of him. I'd like to say that three years behind bars hadn't robbed me of my skills, but I'd be lying to you. I fought valiantly for about ten minutes then lost steam. The battle was over when Squall executed a beautiful spin slash and knocked Hyperion from my hands. The blade spiraled away from me and landed with a clang on the floor.

Squall raised an eyebrow at me, but he didn't try to rub it in. Which almost made it worse. Because if I'd beaten him, I would have rubbed it in, and his lack of conceit meant he was a better man than I. Not that this was ever in question or anything, but it still made me feel like a total jerk.

What bothered me most was that I hadn't even been a challenge for him. Was I so out of shape, or was it that he'd had time to hone his skills through dedicated training?

I decided it was a little of both. I was nowhere near my former skill, and he was leagues beyond where he'd been the last time I'd fought him. It hadn't been an even match by a long shot.

"Not bad," Squall said as he sheathed his blade. "You've got a lot of work to do, but you haven't lost your touch."

I wasn't so much embarrassed as frustrated. I'd known going into it that I would lose, but I hadn't counted on tiring so quickly. I vowed right then that I would spend every free moment I had training. It was the only way I'd ever be able to beat him again, and I wanted that desperately. Not because I held a grudge but because by nature I was competitive, and no amount of time in prison could have taken that out of me.

"Congratulations, Seifer Almasy. System ranks your new level at thirty-five."

Squall flashed a half smile and it was my turn to raise an eyebrow. He just shrugged and walked away.

After a moment, he stopped, looked over his shoulder and said, "There are a lot of people who don't want you here."

"Tell me something I don't know."

The real question was, was he one of them? I didn't ask. I wouldn't give him or anyone else the satisfaction. But I was curious. He didn't act like he hated me, but then Squall never really gave anything away. Growing up, I'd never known what he was thinking, and I'd never known if he'd hated me back then, or if he considered me a nuisance, or if he considered me at all. It was the same now. I still couldn't tell.

He turned to face me, crossed his arms and looked me in the eye.

"Don't blow it, Seifer. You won't get another chance."

That statement gave me the answer to my question. Squall had been one of my supporters, though why in Hyne's name he'd vouch for me, I couldn't even begin to comprehend. He had every right to want to lock me up somewhere and forget about me. He shouldn't have cared where I ended up or what happened to me. He shouldn't have cared whether I screwed up again or not. It wasn't like we'd ever been friends, though we had a long, violent history, and I couldn't even imagine us being friends now, but that's what it felt like.

Somehow, I got the impression that his opinion of me had changed. He didn't hate me, he didn't fear me. Respect was the last thing I ever expected to get from Squall Leonhart, but that's exactly what I saw in his face. Respect and understanding.

"We're not that different, you know," he said, as if sensing my confusion. "It could be me in your shoes right now. Except, if it were me, no one would have cared enough to bail my ass out."

So, he knew that Ultimecia could have taken him instead of me. She didn't care which of us it was, so long as she had a strong and skilled Knight to do her dirty work. I just happened to get there first. Lucky me.

I wasn't sure what he meant by no one caring if it had been him, though. Not at first.

Then, I remembered that Squall had been a loner, a quiet kid with no friends to speak of. He hadn't stood out, kept to himself, and the only one who ever talked to him outside of class was Dr. K, and sometimes Quistis, but that was only because she had stalker tendencies and a secret desire to jump his bones and she'd never left him alone.

He let that sink in for a moment before speaking again.

"I train around this time every morning. If you ever fee like sparing, I'll be here," he said and finally walked away.

I decided the next time I faced him, I would at least be able to give him a run for his money.

As Squall left the training center, he wondered what would come of this situation. There was no doubt in his mind that Seifer had the potential to be great, but he was concerned that it might not work out. Not because he worried that Seifer would get too comfortable and revert back to the childish asshole he'd been, but because there were a lot of people who were not happy with the board's decision. In fact, Squall's biggest concern was for Seifer's safety within the walls of Balamb Garden. A regression into old habits would be easily dealt with, compared to what might happen should someone actively seek revenge against Seifer. Squall had already heard the whispers and the complaints from staff and cadets alike. They didn't want him here, and some of them had said more than they should have, one or two even threatened to kill Seifer while he slept.

Squall wondered why he even cared about what happened to Seifer Almasy. They'd never been friends, and it wasn't as if Squall had any real reason to want to be. The only reason he was here at all was because of Cid and Rinoa. They'd been fighting to get Seifer out of Galbadia for a long time, and now that he was here, it seemed nobody was happy about it, except for Cid.

Still, Squall could tell that Seifer was a different man now. The fire in him had burned out a little, though Squall could tell there was still plenty of it left, just not the kind that would burn out of control like before. And his burdens were written all over his face. No doubt, guilt was his constant companion. No doubt, he'd had his share of sleepless nights.

In spite of his reservations, Squall knew he had to trust this, and trust Cid's ultimate decision.

Cid had an uncanny ability to read and understand people and their potential, even if they didn't realize it themselves. After all, somehow, Cid had known that Squall had it in him to lead Garden during the last Sorceress War, when no one else around them, and certainly not Squall himself, had seen it. He'd even known that sending Squall to help the Forest Owls would change everything, if only that it meant he'd meet Rinoa. Cid had known back then that the two of them were destined to be together, and had admitted as much to Squall. So, Squall had to follow Cid's instincts and trust them now, and he hoped that this was how it was supposed to be.

It chilled Squall to think about how it might have been him instead of Seifer. Had Seifer resisted Ultimecia, she would have come for Squall. It was just lucky for Squall that Seifer had grandiose dreams of being the Knight of a powerful Sorceress and had easily bought into the pipe dream of having everything he ever wanted come true. Squall was almost certain that if Ultimecia had come to him, he wouldn't have been able to resist her either. Not because he shared Seifer's romantic dream, but because back then, Squall had believed in nothing. Sure, he'd been able to recite Garden directives by rote, but he'd only been there because there was nowhere else for him to go. He didn't really care about anything, or anyone. How easily Ultimecia could have manipulated him, being that he was just an empty soul with no one to believe in or turn to.

Which was why he did feel some sympathy for Seifer, and why he had to grudgingly respect the man, even if he didn't exactly deserve it. Because he knew, under the right circumstances, Seifer might become his most powerful ally. And for all Seifer's shortcomings, he was a man that Squall wanted on his side in a fight.

Later, I reported to Selphie's office, ready for her to put me to work, but not knowing exactly what she had in store for me. She was already there, looking bright and perky, as though she'd mainlined a pot of strong coffee. Which, I figured, was a strong possibility.

"Hiya," she said cheerily. "Sleep well?"

I ignored her question and looked around at the mess inside the office.

"This looks like a storage closet," I said.

"Well, at the moment it is, but we're going to clean it out, paint it and it'll be good as new. Then, we can start planning all kinds of stuff. We can talk about it while we work. I bet you have all kinds of great ideas, since you kinda used to be the cool guy around here."

I raised an eyebrow at her. Cool guy. Gimme a break.

"I'm so glad you're here to help me," she continued. "I've been begging for help to get this thing started for years, but until now we didn't have the room or the staff to do it. But now you're here and it's going to work out, just like I hoped it would! We're going to have so much fun. I'm sure were going to make a great team, don't you think?"

I'd been in the room two minutes, and already, she was making my head hurt with her chatter. I wasn't sure how involved in this thing I was supposed to be, but I was getting the impression that she expected a lot. It was on the tip of my tongue to say something smart, but I held back. If what Cid said was true, then Selphie was my lifeline. My judge and jury, and pissing her off would be a one way ticket back into the slammer.

"I've got so many plans, Seifer!" she said happily. "And with your help, I'll finally be able to make them happen. I'm so glad you're here. And I've got a surprise for you later. But first, lets get some work done."

She had a surprise for me? Part of me was curious to know what it was, and the other part dreaded it. For all I knew, she was having my rooms painted a hideous shade of bile yellow or something while I was out. Or perhaps it might involve bubble gum, flowers and lemonade, which might be even worse.

"You want some coffee before we get started?" she asked. "I've got a pot on in the other room."

"God, yes," I mumbled and followed her to the room that had once been the preschool. I was going to need a pot to myself to keep up with her.

"Oh, before I forget," she said over her shoulder as she poured me a giant sized cup of coffee for herself, "I've got a sign-up sheet for you."

"A sign-up sheet?" I asked.

"Mm-hmm. We'll need student volunteers to help us out with all our projects. Part of your job will be to get people to sign up to help us out."

Oh. She wanted me to recruit people to help with all this lunacy. Did she forget who she was talking to? I wouldn't be able to get within ten feet of anyone without them freaking out or running away. She had to know that, or else she was just really naive.

I sipped my coffee and looked around the room, trying to convince myself to get on board with all this nonsense. I decided that maybe teaching moombas to read wasn't such a bad idea. Probably easier than dealing with this day in and day out. Already, I could tell it was going to be a lot harder than I thought it would be. Mostly because I would have to repress the urge to choke Selphie on a minute-by-minute basis. Her chatter and enthusiasm made my head spin.

On the other hand, if I could get through it, I'd be a free man with a good job and a future that didn't involve daily beatings by prison guards and food that actually had flavor. Not to mention the luxury of showering alone and a sweet sound system in which to play my favorite music at a ridiculously high volume.

She chattered on, but I barely listened. She talked too fast for me to process it all at once. Instead, I enjoyed the coffee and inspected the room. If I was going to do this, I figured I'd better familiarize myself with my surroundings. The room itself wasn't anything special, but it was large and had potential. I thought about what I would have wanted in an activity center, about what might make it worth actually using, assuming we'd had one back then.

"We need a pool table," I blurted out, interrupting whatever Selphie was saying.

Selphie's face brightened. "That's a great idea! See, I knew we'd be on the same page. Oh, this is going to work out great. I'm so glad you're here!"

I thought about how glad it would make me to push her off a cliff. From then on, I decided, it would be best just to keep my mouth shut and my ideas to myself.

After that, she put me to work, and I have to admit, she was a slave driver. Not that she didn't do her part, because she did. She put everything she had into hauling the boxes down to MD storage, barely taking a breath as she chattered at me about all her plans and ideas. We must have taken fifteen loads of boxes down by lunch time, at which point, she grinned and looked around at the now barren office.

"I'm starving," she announced. "Let's go get a bite to eat, shall we?"

I was hungry too, but I'd had just about all I could take of her. I'd lost count of how many times I'd considered duct taping her mouth shut. Not to mention all the other horrible things my mind conjured up. Spending the day working like a dog while she spewed forth her grand plans was one thing. Actually sitting down and having lunch with her, as if we were friends, was another.

"I think I'll pass," I said.

"Oh come on," she whined. "You've got to be hungry, and besides, I have a surprise for you. Remember?"

Right. The surprise.

With great reluctance, I agreed and followed her to the cafeteria, wishing she'd drop dead. She was being so Hyne-damned nice to me, and I felt like the world's biggest jerk for hating her for it.

I sat down to a plate of the famous grilled Balamb fish, which I hadn't had in three years, and took a bite. It tasted divine, especially when compared to the cardboard flavored 'meat' we got in prison. It almost made having lunch with Selphie worth it.

"Seifer!" a familiar voice called and I looked over my shoulder to see my two best friends in the world approaching. It was like the freaking sun coming out after a week of torrential rains, let me tell you. I got to my feet and grinned.

For a second, I thought I was actually going to cry.

Shut up. You'd feel the same way if you were me.

"Welcome home, ya know?" Raijin bellowed and gave me a fierce buddy hug. He almost crushed my rib cage, but I didn't care. I'd missed the both of them more than I would ever admit to either, and I'd deal with a couple of bruised ribs if it meant my Posse was reunited.

"Good to see you, man," I said and then turned to Fujin and wrapped my arms around her, forgetting that she wasn't overly fond of being touched. I didn't care. It was the best thing that had happened all day and it gave me a little hope that maybe I'd be able to handle this after all.

Fujin kicked me in the shin and I let her go, laughing even though it hurt just as much as it used to. At least some things hadn't changed.

"Selphie told us you were coming back, ya know?" Raijin said, "And asked if we wanted to join you for lunch, ya know?"

I looked at Selphie and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Surprise," she said, grinning.

For just a split second, I felt like hugging her, too. But then I remembered that the only thing that could have made me happier than seeing my Posse again would have involved feeding her to a ruby dragon.

Still, it was the nicest thing anyone had done for me in a long time, and I had to admit that I was grateful. While I may be the worlds biggest asshole, at that moment, I was a humbled asshole.

Not only did we have lunch together, my Posse accompanied me to Balamb, along with Selphie, to purchase new clothing, since what I had didn't quite fit anymore, thanks to my bulked up physique. Everything was at least three years out of style anyway. It was time for some new things. With them at my side, the world righted itself again and I felt as if I were on more stable ground. I didn't even care that the civilians in town were glaring at me with hatred in their eyes and I didn't care that Selphie talked a blue streak all the way through town. I had my Posse back and that was all that mattered.

In the clothing store, I poked through the racks without enthusiasm as Selphie inspected a table of folded shirts with great care. She picked one up and showed it to me.

"What about green?" she asked. "Goes with your eyes."

"No," I said. I glanced around and sighed. "None of this stuff is me. Too preppy."

"Preppy's in, ya know?" Raijin said.

I looked at him as if he had moombas crawling out his nose. What the hell did Raijin know about what was 'In?!'

"I don't want preppy," I said irritably.

"You're going to be an instructor, Seifer," Selphie pointed out. "You might have to start dressing the part."

"Cid didn't say anything about that," I protested. "Besides, I'll be wearing a uniform in class, so who cares?"

"I mean outside of class," she said. "Don't you want to look professional?"

"I want to look like me, not some preppy jerk."

Defeated, Selphie shrugged and went back to the table.

"How about black?"

I sighed. "Fine. Black. Whatever."

She tossed me the shirt.

"Go try it on," she commanded.

Raijin pushed a pair of jeans into my hands, too, and I glared at him.

"What is this, a conspiracy?!"

"Just try it, ya know?"

I felt like the two of them had ganged up on me and dragged me into an episode of "Ambush Makeover." Seriously, this preppy thing was not me. I doubted it ever would be. But, to shut them up, I tried them on and groaned when I looked in the mirror. I looked like an idiot.

"Come out and show us," Selphie said.

"No," I said, glaring at my reflection.

"Come on," she insisted. "Or we're coming in there."

At that moment, I thought spending the rest of my life in the brig was a great idea. I stepped out of the fitting room and stood there defeated while Selphie and Raijin inspected me critically.

"Looks good," Selphie said.

"I look like a metrosexual," I said flatly. "On his way to the gay club."

"No you don't," Selphie countered. "You look hot."

"This is a good look for you, ya know?" Raijin said. "It says young and hip, ya know?"

"Young and hip?!" I asked, feeling absolutely helpless and completely betrayed. "Since when do you give a crap about fashion?"

"Things change, ya know?" Raijin said with a shrug.

I looked to Fujin for help, but she just shrugged.

"Thanks a lot," I said to her. "You've been a big help."

"I think you should get it," Selphie said.

"The jeans, maybe," I conceded. "The shirt, no way in hell. Aren't there any stores that sell non-preppy stuff. Metal band t-shirts, leather, dog collars with spikes on them?"

Selphie looked appalled.

"Look, you have to have a couple of things that are a little dressier. A couple of nice shirts and pants. That's all we're saying."

"Fine," I grumbled, "but after this, I want some real clothes."

"There's a punk shop around the corner, ya know?" Raijin said.

"That sounds more like it," I said.

The clothing at the punk place was more my style. There, I snatched up a couple pairs of black cargo pants, biker boots and a black trench coat, while Selphie and Raijin tried on black wigs. They laughed and joked with one another, which struck me as being very odd. I'd never imagined my friends getting along with any of them, but it seemed Selphie and Raijin were acting like they'd been friends their whole lives. I half expected them to link pinkies and declare one another their BFF.

I'll be honest, it annoyed the hell out of me. They weren't supposed to be friends. They weren't supposed to even like each other, and I felt something like betrayal as I watched them goof off together.

I selected a couple more T-shirts and went over to the poster display where Fujin waited, looking very uncomfortable. She obviously wasn't into the idea that Selphie and Raijin were buddies now either, which was a relief. At least I knew what to expect from her.

"What," she barked when I flashed her a grin.

"It's really good to see you guys," I said.

I plucked a t-shirt off the rack, which advertised one of my favorite bands, Sephiroth, and added it to my collection.

"Wimp," she said, which made me laugh. I'd missed her insults and put downs, not that there'd been any shortage of those in Galbadia's prison system, but coming from her, it was different.

"Maybe I am," I agreed.

Over in the corner, Selphie and Raijin were inspecting knee high black patent leather platform boots. The kind stripper's wear.

Which reminded me that I hadn't gotten laid in three years either.

"Do you have these in a five?" Selphie asked the clerk, who glared hatred back at the perky little imp. Selphie didn't seem to notice.

I selected a couple more shirts, one of which said, "You Suck," on it, and stepped into the fitting room. I could hear Raijin and Selphie giggling outside, and I knew they were up to no good when I heard him say, "You should try it on, ya know."

When I emerged, Selphie was still in the fitting room, and I heard her giggling to herself.

"What's she doing?" I asked Raijin, more annoyed than curious.

"Trying out a new look, ya know?"

I'll be honest. The idea of Selphie clad in non-cheerleader clothing intrigued me. I couldn't picture her in anything but those damned yellow sun dresses she seemed to live in.

I shifted from foot to foot while I waited, thinking about the months to come. Did I really want this? And could I really handle it, or was I about to make a huge mistake? Was it really even worth it? I wasn't sure, but I was starting to have doubts, beginning with my ability to control my mouth and temper around Selphie. I hoped that she was something I could get used to, and tune out eventually, or else I was going to go starkers.

When Selphie stepped out of the fitting room, my jaw dropped. She looked sexy as hell in a Goth version of a school girl outfit, the platform boots, and her shirt opened just enough to reveal a hit of cleavage. Around her throat was a spiked dog collar.

Hyne, if she weren't so nuts, I might have been interested, especially if she be willing to dress like that sometimes. But then I remembered that she never shut up and seemed to think stickers, unicorns and rainbows were the end-all, be-all, best thing since hot dogs.

The outfit was hot, but the girl in it was certifiable, and annoying.

"I think I just found my masquerade day costume," she said, looking pleased. "Maybe Irvy could dress up like a Monk of Hyne."

Irvy. The cowboy. Her boyfriend.

"Oh, yeah," Raijin agreed. "Looks good on you, ya know?"

I was getting impatient. "Can we get out of here?"

"Yeah, we should be getting back," Selphie agreed. "I'll be out in a minute."

I paid for my things, and then not so patiently waited as Selphie purchased the outfit, dog collar and boots. My mind conjured up the image of her wearing it, and turned it into something dirty. I shook it off and tried to tell myself that fantasizing about her wouldn't help matters any.

As we headed back, I only half listened to Selphie and Raijin's chatter. I was going to have to get a grip if I was going to make it through this, but there was absolutely no doubt in my mind that this was going to be a slow, bumpy road to hell.

--

A/N Sorry for the delay. Computer crashed, taking the final drafts with it. Fortunately, PodSara still had all the drafts. Anyway, here's chappy two. Expect an update around Tuesday or so.

Enjoy, and don't forget to review!!

Sara and the Wench….