Author's note: Finally found time to write. SChool's absolutely killing me, but anyway that's not what I'm here to discuss. I took time to think through my wonderful crack baby of a story and have thought up explinations for my wonderful reviewrs who asked. Don't you fret I know this chapter only has a very brief explination but I have another paper to write. More will be revealled in more chapters just as in any story. Orin and Little Shop of Horrors do not belong to me. The girl however is mine. No, she's not me.
Slowly I made it down the stairs. I still didn't feel very confident in my ability to walk, and I shook the whole way down. I was convinced I was going to fall off the face of the planet if I didn't practically cling to the railing. After that ordeal I looked around the ground floor. The lights down here were dimmer than they had been in that bathroom. That was quite a relief for my eyes and head. Still nothing was ringing any bells. It was pretty nice in here though. A lot better than some of the places I had woken up in before. I'd tell you where, but that's not important nor do you really want to know.
Eventually I made my way into the kitchen. The kid was in there going through some closet looking for something. I would be told later that this was the pantry. There was a table on the other end of the room so I decided I might as well sit down. I wasn't just going to stand there like some brain dead idiot. Just to be annoying I took my seat making as much noise as I could. My host clearly wasn't amused pressing a button turning the lights to full brightness, and I think I could have gone blind then and there. Pleased with my reaction the girl put the lights back on dim. I think I should have just killed her then. I probably didn't because my head was still hurting and I had absolutely no idea where I was.
As I watched this kid make breakfast I realized just how hungry I was. I couldn't remember the last time I ate. No wonder my stomach had been making all that racket. It let out a loud growl that not even I expected. The kid started laughing saying something I didn't hear, but I shot her a glare that shut her up instantly. It felt good. Very good. After what seemed like hours, to me at least, the kid came over and sat across the table from me. She asked if I wanted anything clearly remembering the growling of my stomach from before, but I just scowled. It's not that I didn't want food because as I said I was starving, but I still didn't trust whoever this was. After eating a few spoonfuls of what I guessed to be cheerios (not that I cared) the kid decided to talk.
"So you wanna know what's going on," the kid said pushing her bowl off to the side. Her calmness was really starting to piss me off. Lucky for her she hadn't done anything particularly horrible to set me off. I was really hoping she'd give me some decent reason to knock her out though. I was getting bored fast.
Still the kid looked back at me for the longest time. It really unnerved me so I finally couldn't keep my mouth shut. "Just tell me where the Hell I am and let me leave! Are you enjoying this ya sicko?" I was just about ready to strangle this kid. My hands were already eager to get this over with.
Before I was able to the kid spoke, "Well, I can tell you where you are. You're in New Jersey. Right in the middle suburbia. Quaint isn't it? Now, as for letting you leave? That's a big no. You've seen yourself. I don't think you're fit to go anywhere. If I were you Orin Scrivello I'd be grateful for my hospitality. Not everyone would welcome a sadistic, druggie dentist into their home." How in the world did this kid know who I was? As I've said I'd never before seen her in my life. Now she was telling me I couldn't leave? Oh no. I was not about to be told what to do by some stupid kid. Something in the back of my mind wouldn't let me get up and just leave. Believe me I could have, but I seemed glued to the spot. This kid knew a lot about me. Maybe she'd know what happened. At the very least things would start making sense.
"OK, kid, tell me what's going on before I kill you. Sound like a good deal?" I had added the threat bit just for fun hoping to get some reaction. Still nothing though. If being here wasn't torture enough I was stuck with some kid who wasn't afraid of my threats. Great. Just great.
Taking a deep breath my host said plainly, "You're dead, and I brought you back. That is what's going on. It's simple as that…well it's relatively simple." I think I just sat there for a minute. This kid was not only keeping me here (sorta), but she was insane.
"Bull shit," I laughed, "You think I'm going to believe some weird teenage girl I just met? You must be some kind of idiot. I'm not dead. I look like a mess, but I'm not dead." This kid couldn't have been telling the truth. No, it was all a lie. I wasn't dead. I couldn't be, but damn…if she was this kid was good at making things sound believable.
"I don't appreciate your tone," the girl's voice was suddenly quite serious. More so than I thought possible. Her holier than thou attitude was not something I expected from a girl. "Don't be so ignorant. Check for yourself if you don't believe me." That was the last straw standing up I practically flipped over the table. This kid had gone too far.
"I. Am. Not. Dead. If you know me well enough you should know I'm not about to take to you're shit. I'm going to snap your stupid neck and get out of here!" To add effect I grabbed her wrists practically shoving her into the wall. There were going to be bruises. Trust me I could tell. At that very moment, just as I was about to show this kid what happens when you mess with Orin Scrivello D.D.S., a sharp pain shot through my arms. I let go immediately grimacing and rubbing my shoulders I felt something that didn't quite…belong. Sure enough on both shoulders were stitches which appeared to be holding my arms in their sockets. I shot a confused glance at the kid. I don't panic often, but I believed this would be a could time to panic a little.
The girl was rubbing her wrists painfully glaring at me. With a curt nod she seemed to restart my mind and I quickly walked to the room over. I checked and sure enough there were more similar stitches on my body. If more color could have drained from my face it would have. No, this couldn't be happening. Once again the throbbing started up in my head, and the images returned. This time so did my memory. It all came back with agonizing clarity. I remembered it all. I was dead. The kid was right after all. I'd died laughing. Ironic. Far too ironic. And that guy I'd seen before, the nerdy one, he'd watched it all. He couldn't…no he wouldn't help me get the mask off. His name still didn't come back to me but it didn't have to. I remembered enough. Possibly too much.
After the pain passed I returned to that kitchen. The kid had gotten ice to put on her wrists and was sitting quietly at her seat. Still in a stupor I sat down in the chair I had been in before.
Forcing out the words I managed to say, "So, I'm…" I couldn't finish. I was ready for my host's know-it-all replies to come and hit me once more but there was only silence. Looking up I saw she was watching me.
"I told you so," she whispered. I grimaced. I hate it when people prove me wrong. That's why I make a point to avoid people like this kid. However, there were still a few things I wanted to ask. It's those strange, nagging, questions a person gets when they realize they're no longer "of the living".
"Why?" I managed to finally force out. "Why the hell would you bring some guy you hardly know back from the dead? I know I wouldn't bring back your sorry ass."
"Mostly because I can," the girl shrugged. "I must say it was quite a challenge putting all the pieces back together. Luckily that big plant didn't take much time to chew ya up, so it was just an issue of remembering what connects to what. Oh, I'm sorry I couldn't find your right big toe. You still might be a little unbalanced once you get all your strength back."
"Wait a minute, kid, you're going to fast. Remember, I've been dead for who knows how long. You mean that avocado ate me?" I still could hardly believe the stuff I was hearing. Not only had I laughed to death, but I'd been eaten by a salad. Fantastic. Fan-fucking-tastic.
"Okay, look," the girl continued with painful slowness. "The plant that ate you, luckily society was able to scrounge up enough weed killer, axes, and worms to take the thing down. You getting all this?" I was…a little. "Now, here's where I come in. They made a musical base on these events called Little Shop of Horrors and they have the preserved plant on display and it goes from museum to museum. Now, I'm a big fan of theater so I of course saw the show and my favorite character was the one they made out as you." I nodded slowly. I'd heard some messed up stories in my time but this one had to be the most bizarre. Musicals? Giant plants? Freaky teenagers? If she hadn't seemed so damn serious I would have laughed.
"Look kid I asked for you to tell me what the hell happened. Just get to the point." I was already getting impatient. When I ask someone the time I don't ask them to build the whole damn clock.
"Long story short, I watch too much Frankenstein, talked my way into letting the museum staff let me get a closer look, found bits and pieces of you and figured 'Why the Hell not?'" the kid said without a single breath. I had no come back for that. How would anyone reply to that.
"Who'd of believed it?" I managed to force out with an odd forced laugh. The girl looked back at me for a minute or two before answering simply.
"Believe it."