Ruby went upstairs, dragging an unwilling Misery behind her. The others followed.
"What do you want for breakfast, Misery?" Ruby asked.
"Whatever there is that has no possibility of catching on fire. Or being poisoned. But to be safe I should probably leave the room, just in case." She left.
"Hmm... Cereal?" Ruby said.
"Shouldn't you make her something more special for her birthday?" Iris asked, bouncing across the kitchen with her spring shoes.
"She did say she didn't want anything that could catch on fire. I should probably give her what she wants," Ruby replied.
"Come on, Ruby! Surprise her! She'll be happy."
"Okay, I guess you're right. I'll make muffins."
While Ruby was busily cooking, Misery was making her escape. She crept out of the house, hoping to find a place where she wouldn't hurt anyone or cause much damage, but unfortunately, she tripped and fell noisily down the front stairs, ruining her secrecy.
"Ow."
Iris poked her head out the window. "You okay, Misery?"
"I'm not here," Misery replied. "I'm inside, just like you wanted me to be. This is all an illusion."
"Um, okay. Well, Illusion Misery, you'd better tell the real Misery that it's almost time for breakfast and she should come to the kitchen."
"Why do they want to endanger themselves like this?! I am at least three times more of a walking disaster than I usually am today. This is going to end badly, I just know it," Misery said to herself.
"I made birthday muffins!" Ruby said.
"Nothing burned?"
"Nope. See, Misery, it's all in your head."
"Well, to be fair, I wasn't in the room. Probably something would have happened if I had been."
"Just come and have some muffins."
Reluctantly, she sat down and cautiously took a muffin. As soon as she put it on her plate, the plate inexplicably shattered. She took a bite of the muffin and immediately started coughing. She spit out the muffin, wincing.
"What happened?" Skull Boy asked, concerned.
"There were pieces of ceramic in my muffin," Misery explained. "From the broken plate. I cut my tongue."
"Well, at least you noticed before you swallowed it... right?" Ruby said. She was smiling, but her eyes looked unsure.
"You do have a point. Ruby?"
"Yes?"
"If I don't make it through today, can you please make sure I'm buried with my dolls and my great-great-great-great-you-get-the-idea-grandmother's tablecloth? And don't invite both my cousins to my funeral. I don't want to offend either of them, though, so afterwards can you tell her it got lost in the mail?"
"Misery! Don't talk like that."
"Like what? Does my voice sound different? I'm sick, aren't I?"
"No! You're going to be fine."
"Of course. As sure as Gloomsville is sunny, I'm going to be fine."