Scene opens in an Orlando hotel. Monica, Rachel, Ross, Erin, Joey, Mike, and Phoebe are standing in the lobby. Enter Chandler from the restrooms.
Monica: What took you so long?
Chandler: There are automatic towel dispensers in the bathrooms here!
Monica: Oh no, what did you do?
Chandler: It was awesome! I waved to it until I got this trail that stretched all the way to the other wall!
Joey: Awesome!
Monica: Oh my god, you guys are thirty-six.
Chandler: It's Disney World.
Monica: So?
Chandler: So, whenever you're in Disney World, you're allowed to act like you're ten or younger.
Rachel: What kind of theory is that?
Joey: Look! Ice cream!
Exit Joey. Theme song and title sequence play. Scene opens in a gateway in front of Disney World. Monica and Chandler are speaking with a Disney cast member who is standing behind a desk. Rachel is standing next to Ross and behind a stroller that contains Emma. A double stroller with Jack and Erica in it is parked behind Chandler and Monica. Phoebe, Mike, Joey, and Erin are standing by Rachel and Ross. Rachel is trying to rub sun block onto Joey's face.
Phoebe: Come here, almost done.
Joey jerks away.
Phoebe: Joey!
Joey: It's cold.
Phoebe: It'll warm up as soon as you get into the sun!
Joey: How do you know?
Phoebe: Joey, come here and let me finish, you're acting like a little kid.
Joey: Am not!
Phoebe: Are too!
Joey: Am not!
Phoebe: Are too!
Joey: Am-
Rachel shoves her hand in Joey's face and rubs the rest of the sun block into his skin.
Joey: Ow! It stings!
Monica: Guys, it's your turn to get your tickets.
Monica and Chandler pass through the turnstiles.
Chandler: See y'all on the other side!
Monica: "Y'all"? Really?
Chandler: We're in the south!
Monica: Still, you can't just walk around and say "y'all". People might think you're mocking them.
Chandler: Okay.
Monica: You have to watch what you say, Chandler. I can't keep tagging along and being the responsible one.
Chandler: You left the kids on the other side of the turnstiles.
Monica: Crap!
Scene ends and opens in a crowded pathway in Disney's Hollywood Studios. Monica and Erin are looking at a map. Rachel and Ross are standing next to Emma's stroller. Phoebe and Mike are looking around. Joey is looking for an ice cream vendor.
Rachel: Emma, look! It's Goofy!
Phoebe: Tourists.
Mike: Is anybody here not a tourist?
A pause.
Phoebe: Mickey!
Erin: Okay, do you guys want to go to the roller coaster and the tower first, or-
Ross: The what?
Erin: The roller coaster and the tower.
Ross: Excuse me?
Erin: The roller coaster and-
Monica: The Rock 'n' Roller Coaster and the Twilight Zone Tower Of Terror.
Ross: Oh, okay.
Monica: You are such a geek.
Erin: Um…
Monica: Ignore him. Anyway, would you guys rather go to the roller coaster and the tower first or the movie ride?
Mike, Phoebe, Ross, Rachel, Erin, and Chandler: Movie ride.
Joey: That's great! We'll just split up.
Monica: Joey, you're the only one who wants to go on the roller coaster and the tower first.
Joey: Actually, Emma, Erica, and the other one didn't say anything.
Monica: It's Jack, Joey.
Joey: His middle name is my name?
A pause.
Monica: He's right, let's split up.
Chandler: I'll go with Joey.
Ross: Yeah, me, too.
Mike: I'll go.
Ross: Cool, it'll be just like old times again! The guys all hanging out. And Mike.
Mike: Phoebe, will you be okay?
Phoebe: What, you think I can't support myself for a few hours? You're such a stereotypical, rude guy.
Mike: Okay, that word has been tossed around with my name in the past…minutes, so, for now, I'm just "Mike".
Monica: Okay, you guys all have your cell phones, right?
Chandler: Yeah.
Ross: I do.
Joey snickers.
Ross: What?
Joey: You said "I do".
Ross: So?
Joey: You and Rachel just got engaged.
Ross: Okay…
Joey: It's funny.
Ross: I'll take your word for it.
Monica: Okay, so…the girls are going to the movie ride, and the guys are going to the roller coaster.
Rachel: Sounds good!
Monica: Okay, how about we meet at the roller coaster when we're done?
Chandler: Okay.
Monica, Rachel, Erin, Phoebe, and the kids exit to the left. Ross, Chandler, Joey, and Mike exit to the right. Scene ends and opens on a pathway. Rachel, Monica, Erin, Phoebe, and the kids are walking. Joey is trailing behind them, unseen.
Rachel: I love Disney World. It's like a whole city of rides and characters.
Monica: I wonder if they have elections.
Rachel: Elections for what?
Monica: Oh, mayor. President. Queen.
Phoebe: Monica, you cannot take over Disney World.
Monica: But…churros!
Monica points to a churro stand.
Monica: And it's not like I would ever want to run in some other world.
Rachel: Mickey and Minnie are the king and queen, Monica, get over it.
Monica: Yeah, but who takes over the throne once Mickey dies?
Rachel: Some other guy in a mouse suit!
Monica: What if it were me in the mouse suit?
Joey laughs.
Erin: Joey? What are you doing here?
Rachel: Yeah, we split up, like, ten minutes ago!
Joey: I thought this group was getting ice cream.
Phoebe: No.
Joey: So Chandler's group is getting ice cream?
Rachel: No! Nobody is getting ice cream!
Monica: I- I'm getting ice cream.
Erin: What?
Monica: He made me hungry!
Phoebe: Joey! Look what you did! You brought out the little fat girl in Monica!
Joey: Fine! If I'm not wanted, then I'll just go find Chandler and the guys.
Rachel: Okay.
Joey exits.
Rachel: I can't believe he would tag along and ask for ice cream when we haven't even gone on a ride yet.
Rachel, Erin, and Phoebe begin to walk towards the Great Movie Ride.
Monica: What, we aren't getting ice cream?
A pause.
Monica: Fine.
Monica follows Erin, Rachel, and Phoebe, and they exit with the kids. Scene ends and opens in the square between the Rock 'N' Roller Coaster and the Tower of Terror. Chandler, Mike, and Ross are walking. Enter Joey.
Ross: Joey, where were you?
Joey: I thought that they were getting ice cream.
Chandler: Please tell me that when you say "they" you mean Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, and Erin, and not some random family.
Joey: Yeah, I meant Monica and Erin and the others whose names I can't remember right now.
Mike: Phoebe!
Ross: And Rachel.
Joey: Oh, yeah! Those girls that you guys are hugging all the time. Anyway, turns out they weren't getting ice cream, so I came back.
Chandler: Really? You followed them because you thought they were getting ice cream?
Joey: Yes.
Chandler: Are you sure it didn't have anything to do with asking Erin to marry you?
Mike: What?
Ross: WHAT?!
Joey: Hey! I'm over that.
Mike: He was going to propose to that girl?
Ross: Joey?
Joey: Hey! I told you, that was just a crazy thought, I'm okay now.
Chandler: Are you sure?
Joey: Yes!
Chandler: Fine.
Chandler, Ross, Mike, and Joey begin walking toward the Tower of Terror. Joey stops.
Joey: Although, Disney World is a really romantic place to propose.
Chandler: No!
Joey: Just kidding.
Scene ends and opens in the line at the Great Movie Ride. Monica, Rachel, Erin, and Phoebe are standing next to an extravagant dress prop.
Rachel: You think I would look pretty if I got married in that?
Monica: Rachel, you can't buy these.
Phoebe: Yeah, but you can steal them!
Rachel: Ooh, I like that idea.
Erin: Um, guys? Those security guards are looking at us.
Monica: Okay, forget it, Rachel.
Rachel: Fine.
They move forward.
Rachel: What about that crown?
Monica: You can't steal anything, and now everybody thinks you're a kleptomaniac!
Erin: I don't think you're a kleptomaniac.
Monica: You don't count. We only met you a few weeks ago.
Scene ends and opens in one of the cars on the ride. Monica, Rachel, Erin, Phoebe, and the kids are all seated in it.
Monica: I bet I could have shot that cowboy.
Erin: Monica, they're animatronics.
Monica: I still could have shot it.
Phoebe: Why would you want to?
Rachel: Oh! Look! It's The Wizard of Oz.
Phoebe: Aw, look at all the little munchkins.
Monica: I don't know, they look kind of creepy.
Phoebe: Monica! How could you say that about your own children? Hey, look, Oz!
Scene ends and opens in the Tower of Terror's lobby. Chandler, Joey, Mike, and Ross are standing in the middle of the room.
Mike: It's kind of spooky in here.
Joey punches Mike.
Joey: Boo!
Mike: Ow! What was that for?
Joey: I was trying to scare you!
Mike: Then why did you punch me?
Joey: Some people are harder to scare than others.
Chandler: Joey!
Joey: What?
Chandler: It smells like clementines!
A pause.
Joey: You're right!
Ross: Okay, now I'm officially terrified of clementines.
Chandler: Oh, Ross, are you scared?
Ross: No! I just happen to know that these rides can be very risky and subjective to cord-snapping. But the risk is what makes it fun!
Chandler: Really?
Ross" Yes.
Ross jumps to the left.
Ross: Aah! Spider!
Chandler: Come on, wuss.
Chandler, Ross, Joey, and Mike exit. Scene ends and opens in front of the Rock 'N' Roller Coaster. Phoebe and Monica are reading the rules on a board.
Monica: None of you have neck injuries, and you're all taller than four feet, right?
Phoebe: Yeah, but I'm pregnant!
Monica: Oh, no, sorry, Pheebs, I forgot.
Phoebe: How could you forget? I've got this huge lump sticking out of me! And now I can't do anything! I hate getting left out of stuff.
Scene ends and opens in the square between the Rock 'N' Roller Coaster and the Tower of Terror. Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Erin, and the kids are standing by a bench. Enter Chandler, Joey, Ross, and Mike. Chandler and Joey are wearing Mickey Mouse ears.
Monica: What are you wearing?
Chandler: They seemed appropriate.
Mike: Did you guys ride the roller coaster?
Rachel: No. Phoebe threw a fit because she couldn't ride it.
Mike: She threw a fit?
Phoebe: It's not fair!
A passing woman stares at her.
Phoebe: Keep walking! Go ride your little rides! I'll just sit here with something growing inside of me!
Woman exits.
Erin: Do you guys want to go get some lunch?
Monica: Sure.
Rachel: That sounds good.
Ross: Yeah.
Joey: Joey need food!
Scene ends and opens in a café. Ross, Rachel, Erin, Joey, Monica, Chandler, Mike, and Phoebe are seated around a table. Emma, Erica, and Jack are all asleep in their strollers, pushed off to the side.
Mike: Phoebe, I don't see why you're all worked up about this.
Phoebe: What?
Mike: I mean, in a few months, we're going to have a baby.
Phoebe (sarcastically): Oh, sorry, I wasn't aware that all this trouble was actually going to lead us anywhere.
Monica: Phoebe, having a baby of your own is so much better than any roller coaster in the world.
Joey: I don't know, Space Mountain is-
Monica: Joey, shut up.
Phoebe: Yeah, I mean, I guess it will be kind of nice to have a son.
Monica: Kind of? It's great! Babies are so sweet, and cute. Trust me, in a few months, you're going to wonder why you even wanted to go on that roller coaster.
Ross: Yeah, 'cause it's going to be a huge hassle to get that little kid to go anywhere.
A pause.
Ross: Ross, shut up.
Credits appear on the screen.
CREDITS SCENE:
Chandler and Joey are sitting in the Great Movie Ride. Chandler puts his arms in the air.
Chandler: Whoo! Why aren't you screaming?
Joey: Because this thing moves, at like, a quarter of a mile per hour or something.
Chandler: Hey, what would you have done if you'd proposed to Erin and she'd said yes?
A pause. Joey puts his hands up and screams.
END OF SHOW