Hey there! So I got three reviews for the first chapter, which isn't too shabby! Make sure to keep 'em coming guys, and tell your friends! More reviews would be good, but a special thanks to the ones who did review:
parkitcharlie: Ha, is that a good thing? :)
mazeygrace18: Yeah, I felt kind of bad writing everyone against her, but you'll see why later on!
Ayamas4Ever: That was a sweet review, thanks! I'm glad you're interested!
Disclaimer: Roses are red, violets are violet, now that we know our colors, let me just say: I don't own Victorious.
The first time she hurts Cat, it's for her own good.
A couple of months after Tori starts at Hollywood Arts, she finds her rightful place amongst the students. After a little first day drama with Jade West, the girl from the dressing room, things start to mellow out. (Also, Jade thankfully never mentions the Showcase incident, although she has several opportunities to do it.) Since Tori knew Andre from the beginning, he automatically granted her entrance into his friend group. It consists of Robbie Shapiro, Cat Valentine, and unfortunately Jade and her boyfriend, Beck Oliver.
Robbie is an extremely awkward, but fairly nice boy. Although, he tends to say weird things that make everyone uncomfortable at times. Cat Valentine is the sweetest little thing, her personality very vivacious and childlike. She has dyed, flaming red hair to top it off. She's a little more than odd, but at least there's never a dull moment with her. Jade hates Tori, always making cracks at her and setting her up for failure at every chance she gets. Jade even dumped coffee on her head the first day. Tori seriously considered leaving, but decided to get revenge instead. She kissed Beck – who is a really nice guy, by the way – right in front of everyone as a part of an acting game.
Just when Tori thinks everything is normal for once in her life, it all goes bad. Very, very bad. One day, Cat starts talking about a new boy she'd been seeing. Tori thinks nothing of it, until he comes to school to see Cat. Tori is just walking down the hallway before class when she sees him. She gives out a faint yelp, and so does he, as they stare awkwardly at each other. Her brain goes into an absolute panic, and she can't decide whether or not to run. He came back, she thinks in utter horror, to take me again.
Daniel.
They make extremely uncomfortable small talk, and for the life of her, Tori can't figure out why he isn't grinning at her like he would do everyday in Pre-Calculus when she walked through the door. Eventually, to her immense relief, Beck and Jade show up. It's funny; Tori never in a million years thought she would be happy to see Jade. Well, desperate times call for desperate measures. Jade interrogates Daniel and Tori, and they make up an almost laughable lie about how they used to "date".
"So, why'd ya dump her?" Jade asks Daniel, with a bitter sweet smile on her face. Tori looks away, avoiding Daniel's eyes now more than ever.
"Um, actually," Daniel starts to say. Tori freaks out, and for a moment she thinks he's actually going to tell the truth about what he did to her the year before.
"Y-You don't have to–" Tori begins coolly, though inside she's shaking.
"Tori broke up with me." He says instead, and she calms ever so slightly. All she wants to do is run far, far away. Because the boy she has hated for the past year, who is hardly even decent enough to be classified as a human being, is standing in right in front of her. He seized everything that she had in the world and took it away, stripped her clean of her dignity and self esteem along with her clothes. Tori can't believe he even has the gall to stand there and speak to her, after all the damage he caused what seems like so long ago.
Beck asks him why he's here. Suddenly intrigued, Tori repeats his question. Daniel explains that he's been seeing a girl that goes to Hollywood Arts, when Cat comes down the stairwell screaming his name. She jumps into his arms and they kiss as he spins her around in the air. Tori can't breathe. Not Cat, anyone but Cat. Tori thinks over and over, her brain trying to come up with a solution to this horrific problem.
Somewhere along the line, it gets explained to Cat that Tori and Daniel were "involved" before. Then, Tori finds herself caught – literally – in the middle of Cat and Daniel, who are making out, and Beck and Jade, who are following their lead. Tori leaves in a confused, scared state. She goes through her classes one by one in a foggy daze. She honestly couldn't tell you what had been happening in Government class or Speech; her mind was certainly elsewhere.
The week passes with Daniel worming his way through the group to be closer to Cat. It's all Tori can do not to throw up; not because she's jealous, oh God no, but because she's so very afraid for Cat. She's the most innocent, sweet girl Tori knows, and surely she wouldn't give up her virginity to Daniel at sixteen years old. (Honestly, Tori isn't even sure if Cat knows what virginity is.) Tori knows that if Cat doesn't let him have it, Daniel will surely take it from her. How can Tori watch her go through that?
While she's been at Hollywood Arts, Cat has been her best girl friend. They've shared many sleepovers and shopping trips and Tori is really grateful for it. She can't just stand by while some sleazy, disgusting, cruel boy takes everything away from Cat just as he did with her. So, at the annual Hollywood Arts Kickback, Tori takes matters into her own hands.
She stays close enough to see Daniel and Cat the whole night, but they don't notice her. They're too busy dancing, laughing, talking, and kissing. It really sickens Tori, but there's nothing she can do without appearing envious. While eating questionable sausage made by Sikowitz, her favorite acting teacher, she spots them making out against the wall. Tori's eyes fixate themselves on Cat and Daniel. Dread washes all over her when she sees his grimy little hand snake its way up Cat's shirt.
I have to do something, anything! Tori thinks hurriedly, looking around for something shiny or pretty to distract Cat with. There are a couple of forks, but it's not good enough. Her thoughts race to come up with some solution, and quick. Finally, she sees the cheese fondue fountain just sitting on a table, and it's all she's got, so she runs to it. There's no time to think about what she's doing, she just does it. Eyeballing it quickly, Tori cranks one of the nozzles, sending cheese spraying all over Daniel and Cat.
It definitely gets his hands off, but it also sends every eye Tori's way. Now, memories come flooding back to her all at once. There he is, the boy who caused this mess, standing right there in front of her, taunting her with his cold eyes. Suddenly, she's back in the movie theater, his threats and taunts filling her ears like the high pitched screams of a gory horror movie. Tori can't look at him anymore, her brain screaming at her legs to run. She does run; she runs as far into the depths of the school as she can. She finally settles on hiding in the black box theater, figuring Daniel can't find her there.
Tori feels like total, absolute shit. She lets herself curl into a pathetic ball as she screams into her arms. Suddenly, her whole body aches and hurts, like she's being raped all over again. When she's finally done, she allows her thoughts to consume her. How could she just leave Cat with Daniel like that, when his intentions were obviously clear? Beck and Jade find her. She goes through the motions, not really processing any of the things they're saying. And then, Tori gets an idea.
She hurriedly gets away from Jade and Beck, and finds Daniel sitting on the staircase in the main hallway. He doesn't seem to notice Tori walk up. Taking a deep breath, she tells herself that this is what must be done, if she wants to protect Cat. And more than anything, she does. "Don't do it," Tori states meekly, her voice hoarse and puny. She doesn't allow herself to back down, though, as Daniel turns to look her in the eye.
He gives a small, cocky smirk. "Don't do what, Tori?" When it's just the two of them, alone, she makes note that he's not "shy" anymore.
"Don't hurt her like you hurt me." Tori mentally applauds herself for sounding more confident and menacing, although she's knows she's nowhere close to him.
"And why shouldn't I?" He says threateningly, an ominous laugh falls past his disgusting lips – the lips that once forced themselves onto hers. She takes a seat next to him on the stairs, mentally preparing herself. Tori can feel her whole life crumbling around her with what she's about to do and it's an awful feeling. It's all she can do not to run away again, but she just keeps reminding herself that this is something she must do.
"What if–" Tori clears her throat, "What if, instead of doing it to Cat, I let you…Do it to me?" And there it is, her fate is now spread out before her like some sort of unrealistic novel; this is it. She sees Daniel knocking on her door, coming into her house, going up to her room, and corrupting her. She imagines him calling her late at night, saying that he needs her. She would go to him, because she'd have to, and they would do it. She's making the ultimate deal with the Devil, but it is for Cat. So, really, it's okay.
And now Daniel's lips are on hers once more, but it's not as rough as last time. It certainly doesn't feel right, though, but Tori knows it never will. She kisses back and tries to do a good job, because she fears that if she doesn't, he'll look to Cat for better services. Speaking of Cat, she chooses this exact moment to come into the hallway. Tori has no idea where she comes from, but she's brought to her attention when she gasps.
Cat begins to cry, and Tori suddenly feels a thousand times worse. Before Tori can say anything to make it better, Cat storms away, all tears and a broken heart. Tori feels tears of her own welling up in her eyes, but she absolutely can't let Daniel have the satisfaction of seeing her cry. Not again. "She'll get over it." He says, like it's no big deal. "She's too stupid not to." Tori has to bite her tongue from screaming that Cat isn't stupid.
Daniel laughs. "So, what do ya say you let me give you a ride home?" Tori winces internally, and slowly nods her head. She shoots a text to Andre, who brought her, saying that she caught a ride and not to worry. She contemplates tagging SOS onto the end of the text, but she knows that wouldn't be a wise thing to do. Once in the parking lot, Tori recognizes Daniel's black SUV and notices the tinted windows. Fantastic.
As soon as they get inside and shut the door, his lips shove against hers once more. She lets him take each piece of clothing away one by one, until she's just lying on the seat in her underwear. In spite of herself, she lets a few tears escape her eyes as he roughly rips her bra off, then her underwear. His clothes come off too in a rush, and as his boxers come off and a condom goes on, Tori braces herself. It hurts just as much as the first time – and it lasts even longer – but she tries to ignore the pain and lets her thoughts wander.
She almost smiles when she pictures an older Cat Valentine in a happy marriage with three beautiful kids. Robbie's her loving, devoted husband who never hits her, he directs real Hollywood films and they live very comfortably in a nice house in Beverly Hills. Cat's a singer, of course, who occasionally stars in Robbie's movies and a few others. They have two handsome boys and a beautiful girl, and their names are Tyler, Rebecca, and Seth. (Cat's has talked about baby names numerous times.) Together, they all make a gorgeous, happy family.
Thanks to Tori, Cat is able to have the same positive outlook on life she's always had, and her relationships stay normal, because her psyche was never damaged from being raped. Her first time is with Robbie in college when they're both virgins, and even though it hurts, Cat is still happy it happens. Robbie and Cat stay in touch with all of their friends, and everyone stays as close as they were in high school. Beck and Jade get married right out of high school, and they're both successful Hollywood actors. Andre is a singer, and by the time he's twenty-two years old, his first album goes platinum.
Tori gets what she always wanted; to be a pop singer. She's as famous as Andre; they even begin to work on a duet album together. Her acting career starts when she snags the lead of Final Destination 16, and then she luckily goes on to bigger and better movie deals. Tori eventually tells her friends that Daniel raped her multiple times all those years ago, leaving many emotional wounds. She also shows them the faded scars from the various knives and blades. They all comfort her in open arms – even Jade – and Cat sobs when Tori tells her the truth about why her and Daniel were caught kissing on the Hollywood Arts staircase.
Tori attends therapy once a week to sort everything out, and it surprisingly works wonders. She finds herself actually happy for once, and it's incredible. There are no worries; no Daniel lurking around the corner, no blade pressed to Tori's skin. Most importantly, Cat is safe and always will be. Even though it was the hardest, worst thing Tori ever had to do, she's immensely glad that she had sex with Daniel back in high school. Everything worked out the way she always wanted. Perfect.
"Bitch, I said put your clothes back on!" Tori's jerked back into the present, where Daniel is screaming at her as he struggles with his belt. She tries to move from her spot, but all she can do is stare at him. He slaps her right in the face, hard, which brings warm tears stinging her eyes. "Do what I tell you to do or I go to Cat. Wouldn't want that would we?" Tori quickly shakes her head no and gets dressed rapidly.
He takes her home in silence, and when he drops her off he says something about calling her soon. Tori just nods, hoping that soon means two hundred million years later. Before she walks into her house, she composes herself. She's an actress after all; she chooses to look at this as a challenge. When she goes inside, her parents are both sitting on the couch watching a movie. They look so happy with the other's presence, as if it's all they need in the whole world. Tori has trouble not crying.
She wishes them goodnight and makes sure to say 'I love you' to both her parents. She even kisses them both on the cheek, leaving them pleasantly surprised. Tori wants so desperately to be their little girl again; the little girl who played hopscotch and jumped rope with her friends. The little girl who would never, ever cut herself on purpose, because that's just gross. The little girl that didn't know what the word rape meant.
When Tori gets upstairs, she makes sure to take her time brushing her teeth and washing her face, prolonging the time until she has to go to bed. Because she knows as soon as the lights go off, the tears will come on. And when she gets in the shower and starts to scrub her skin with Blueberry Sunshine scented soap, all she can see and feel are his hands on her body. She rubs her skin raw trying to get them off, and it gets to the point that her arm starts to bleed. She ends up on the shower floor, crying, until the hot water runs out.
The next week, Tori drags Cat into the janitor's closet to force her to accept the apology. Long story short, Cat forgives Tori, but Tori ends up with a severely bruised nose. Everything turns back to normal again, except when Daniel calls Tori. He picks her up and they go out to some abandoned parking lot in Northridge. He does his thing, and it's not so bad, because Tori gets to imagine how great life will be once she can get past this. Afterward, though, she feels like a horrible person. She's the person her best friend's boyfriend is cheating with.
When he takes her home, Tori tells her mother that she'll do the dishes tonight. She makes sure no one's watching and then purposefully throws a wine glass on the ground. It looks like an accident, so she doesn't get in trouble. When she's cleaning up, she sneaks a shard of broken glass. She goes into the bathroom and carves in small letters "good friend" into her upper arm.
This chapter reminds me of that Potter Puppet Pals when Harry hits his head against a wall going, "Angst, angst, angst..."
You know, because this chapter's so angsty.
Tell me what you guys think, please, please, PLEASE! Even if you think this story is the worst thing since Rebecca Black, tell me anyway. (It's not that bad is it?)
Reviews are the window to the soul, you know. A lot of people think it's the eyes, but those people are what I like to call wrong.