Chapter 1: Talking With Tabby

"Hi and welcome to Talking With Tabby," Tabitha said to the camera. "Tonight all four of my guests are musicians. It was a complete coincidence I swear! Let's hear it for, Kitty Pryde."

The studio audience cheered as the camera zoomed in on Kitty for the people at home. Kitty waved.

"Lance Alvers," Tabitha went one.

More cheering as Lance nodded to the camera.

"Remy LeBeau from Thieves Guild."

Remy gave the camera a wink and someone in the audience yelled out "Marry me!", causing him to smirk.

"And The Rogue, from Gothic Romance."

Rogue was caught rolling her eyes at Remy's proposal and snickered.

"Welcome to the show, guys," said Tabitha to her guests.

Her guests gave a general "it's great to be here" and "thanks for having us" response.

"So, Kitty, Lance," Tabitha went on. "You guys have got a duet out now."

"Yep," Kitty said proudly. "It was so great to be able to collaborate on a project."

"You two have been dating for awhile now. Working together hasn't put a strain on the relationship at all?"

"Nope," Lance replied. "We work really well together. In fact we're even thinking about doing a combined tour sometime."

'That's great," Tabitha said. "Hey you think we might hear your duet 'Shake Things Up' a little later in the show?"

"Sure," the two replied.

"Awesome," then Tabitha turned to the camera. "This week in entertainment news, Jean Grey's had yet another brush with death when a spot light fell down during her concert in Phoenix and only missed her by inches. Jean really does attract the near-death experiences huh?"

"I think they're like, all staged," Kitty said. "Don't get me wrong, I love her music, but like seriously, things are always 'narrowly missing' her."

"Those spot lights can't just fall either," added Lance.

"Remy?" Tabitha queried. "You dated her right?"

"One date," Remy clarified, holding up his finger to emphasise the point. "Personally, I think she's an attention seeker and figure the best way to deal with her is to ignore her."

"Hear, hear," Rogue said. "If you have to stage accidents to get anyone to listen to your music, well... that speaks volumes to me."

"Pardon the pun?" Gambit teased her.

"Indeed," Rogue said dryly.

"So these 'Haters of Frivolity' have struck again," Tabitha said. "This time they went after Spyke during a concert in LA. Spyke escaped unharmed, as did his fans, although they lost a lot of equipment."

"Like, I hate those guys," Kitty said. "What's their problem? Okay, so they think music is a waste of time, but that's no reason to go around using terrorist tactics during concerts."

"You're telling me," said Lance. "Half a dozen people ended up getting trampled by the crowd in the rush to get out of the hall when they trashed my concert. Seems to me it's only a matter of time before someone gets killed."

"They are putting an awful lot of effort into something they think is frivolous, huh?" Rogue said. "And have you noticed that they primarily go after musicians? Personally, I think the leader of the HoF is tone deaf and grew up in a musical family."

Remy laughed.

"You know, now that you mention it, I have noticed that," said Tabby. "Of course, they also denounce the arts being taught in college and university, and poetry, fiction, acting, and goodness know what else."

"Clearly they're missing the point that the creative arts have dual benefits to society," Rogue said. "They provide culture and entertainment. Plus, and I could be biased, but some of them also speak to the soul."

"Yeah," Remy agreed. "Like when you're going through a hard time and you feel like no one can understand. Or when you just want to celebrate."

"Exactly." Rogue said. "It's just so awesome when you write or find that one song that expresses exactly what you're feeling at that moment."

"Absolument."

"Dazzler's latest hit, 'I Slept With Remy LeBeau (And Damn If I Wouldn't Do it Again)' has absolutely rocked the charts," Tabitha said to the camera and then turned to Remy. "Now, I understand not only did you condone this song, you also appeared in the video clip."

"You gotta be able to laugh at yourself," Remy replied with a grin. "And I did sleep with all o' them, so I probably deserved it."

"You are such a whore," Rogue said disgustedly.

"So I'm told," Remy replied with a smirk. "Although, whores do it for money. I do it for fun. Ali sent me the sound clip when they recorded it and I was laughing so hard I couldn't even listen to it all the way through the first time. Of course I had to appear in the video. It was fun."

"For those of you who have been living under a rock," Tabitha said, "we'll watch a bit of the video…"

The group and the audience turned to the monitors to watch the segment of the video clip play. During which Remy was seen with his hands and lips all over the four girls that made up Dazzler. When they went back to the stage, Remy was chuckling, Kitty and Rogue were shaking their heads and eyeing Remy off with disgust, Lance looked like he wanted to make an approving statement but was worried about retribution from Kitty and Tabitha was looking positively gleeful.

"I think I speak for girls everywhere when I say I'm envious of Dazzler right now," Tabitha said with a sigh.

"Actually," Rogue said. "I'm not really a fan of The Toad and The Blob – mostly 'cause Toad practically stalks Scarlet Witch – but I have to say, I do ascribe to their parody 'They Slept With Remy LeBeau (And Damn If He's Not Infected Again)'."

Kitty giggled.

"Really?" Remy said. "Because while I actually don't mind some o' their songs, I don't appreciate the imagery o' me being infected with fifty-seven different STDs -"

"Are there even fifty-seven different ones?" asked Lance.

"- and father to half the world's population," Remy finished.

"You'll be in for a lot of child support," Lance teased him.

"You forgot the part about the human race dying out because everyone becomes inbred," Rogue said.

Kitty giggled.

"Not to mention all those infections," Rogue added.

"As I said, I don't appreciate that imagery," Remy said. "I did, however, enjoy making a cameo in Dazzler's video clip."

"Well, of course you did," Rogue drawled. "Any excuse to get your paws on them."

"Actually, I think they were the ones looking for the excuse," Remy replied with a smirk.

"Can't imagine why," Rogue retorted.

"I can," Tabitha said. "C'mon, Rogue. You can't seriously tell me you wouldn't want to have his paws all over you."

"I don't even want to be sitting next to him," Rogue replied flippantly.

"You wound me, chére," Remy said, giving Rogue a pathetic look.

"Stop calling me 'chére'. I'm not your darling."

"You can call me 'chére' all you want," Tabitha said cheerfully.

"You know what I think your problem is, Roguey?" Remy asked.

"Don't call me that either," Rogue snapped.

"I think you're in dire need o' getting laid," Remy said. "And -"

"And let me guess, you know how to get around my mutation," Rogue interrupted cynically. "I've lost count of the number of guys who seem to think that's a good pick up line."

"Well, I'm sure I could," Remy replied with a sly smile on his face. "But I hate doing virgins."

"Aww, poor baby. My heart goes out to you... not," Rogue said scornfully.

"Wow," said Kitty, grinning at the pair, "the sexual tension in here is so thick you could cut it with a knife."

Lance laughed.

"Yeah," Rogue said and pointed his thumb at Remy. "He's tense 'cause he hasn't had any in an hour."

"And you've never had any at all," Remy retorted.

"At least I have standards," Rogue replied, "unlike you, who'll do anyone willing to spread their legs for you. There's this thing, Remy, it's called a 'relationship'."

"I've had one o' those," Remy replied. "Two years with Bella Donna, ended when I literally got stabbed in the back."

"You just love saying that, dontcha Swamp Rat?" Rogue said.

"There aren't too many people who can say their relationship ended over a literal stab in the back as opposed to a figurative one," Remy replied merrily.

"Didn't you nearly die?" asked Tabitha.

"Oui," Remy replied. "But hey, you either laugh or you cry, right?"

"And you're far too much of a man to cry," Rogue commented dryly.

"So, you admit I'm too much man for you."

"More like you don't know how to behave around a lady."

"Point out a lady and I'll behave."

"You wouldn't know how to act like a gentleman if one slapped you across the face with a glove."

"I know enough not to steal a lady's clothes, chére," he replied as he took her hand. "Or did you loan the glove to him?"

"Please," Rogue scorned. "He used his own motorcycle glove of course."

"My bad," Remy said as he brought her hand to his lips and he kissed her covered knuckles gently.

"You realise I have to burn these gloves now," Rogue informed him.

"Or you could sell them on eBay and make a fortune," Lance put in, only half joking.

"The sad thing is that's probably true," Rogue said with a sigh.

"You can't fool me, chére," Remy said. "You say that every time. I bet you haven't burned one yet. I know I've seen you wear the same gloves again."

"I buy in bulk," Rogue replied. "With all the diseases you're probably carrying, burning them is a wise precaution."

"Wait, you two have had this conversation before?" Tabitha asked, staring at them.

"Of course," Remy replied grandly. "We've known each other for years."

"Uh huh," Rogue confirmed. "We met when he was still dating that potty-mouthed shrew."

Remy snickered.

"You're not the only one to make that sexual tension joke either, Kitty," Rogue went on. "I don't know why everyone has to say that."

"Umm, because you're so obviously hot for each other?" Kitty suggested.

"Don't insult me," Rogue retorted.

"Wait a second," Tabitha said suspiciously. "We were originally going to have Nightcrawler on the show tonight, but it got switched to you after you guys found out who the other guests were."

"Oh really?" Remy inquired, grinning slyly at Rogue.

"Coincidence," Rogue dismissed with a sniff. "Nightcrawler got double-booked for tonight and didn't realise until the last minute. I was the only one who didn't have plans."

"A likely story," Tabitha replied. "What could he possibly be doing that's more important than my show?"

Rogue paused and then shrugged. She and Kurt had already discussed what she would say if it came up.

"He's celebrating an anniversary of an undisclosed amount of time with his girlfriend," Rogue replied primly. "And that's all I'm going to say on the matter."

"So, Nightcrawler has a girlfriend?" Kitty asked. "Seriously? I thought you guys never said anything about your personal lives."

"Rarely, not never," Rogue corrected with an amused smile on her face. "And need I point out how many years it's taken for anyone of us to admit we have a partner?"

"But we know that Scarlet Witch and Pyro are dating," Tabitha said triumphantly.

"Do you?" Rogue asked ominously. "I don't recall any of us saying anything about that."

"What is with all the secrecy anyway?" asked Lance. "Who cares if everyone knows if you have a girlfriend or a boyfriend or whatever?"

"Why do you care who's dating who?" Rogue replied calmly.

"Curiosity," Tabitha replied.

"Killed the cat," Rogue said.

"I resent that remark," Kitty joked.

"No, you resemble it," Remy teased her.

"Okay, okay," Tabitha said. "I think we're starting to get a bit off-topic now. So, changing the subject completely: Yesterday, The Brotherhood announced their plans for a reunion tour. I understand that a variety of different bands are going to be opening for them at different times throughout the tour, and all of them will be performing at the big band bash at the end. Now for those of you who have been living under a rock, this is major. Seriously major. This is like, Elvis coming back from the dead."

"No it's not," Kitty objected. "Like, all these old bands keep breaking up, say they'll never get back together again, and then like, when someone offers them enough money or whatever, they change their minds."

"Whatever their motivation for coming back," Remy said, "you can't deny The Brotherhood had a major influence on the music scene."

"Yeah," Lance agreed. "I know they really influenced me."

"Whatever," Kitty dismissed. "Why are they even called 'The Brotherhood' anyway? Aren't two of them girls?"

"It was supposed to be ironic," Rogue replied.

"Well, it's certainly that," Kitty sniffed. "Storm's way better."

"Storm opened for their 'Days of Future Past' tour," Rogue pointed out with a smirk. "It was that tour that got her signed with Xavier Records."

Kitty was silent.

"Well, the reunion is still cool," Lance said. "I wonder who's going to be opening for them?"

"Actually -" Rogue and Remy began, paused, then looked at each other and said: "You too?"

"How is it you're not dating?" asked Kitty.

The two ignored her and gave each other five.

"All right," said Rogue the same time Remy said "Très bon."

"Well, I'm jealous," Lance said.

"We've got the second last leg o' the tour," Remy went on. "What about you?"

"The last leg," Rogue replied with a grin.

"Nice," Remy said, wrapping his arm across Rogue's shoulders. "So we'll be right after each other at the band bash."

"Most likely," Rogue agreed. "Get your arm off me."

"Make me," he challenged her playfully.

Rogue lifted her gloved hand and cupped his face. She ran her thumb over his lips, their faces now dangerously close. Remy was just getting all caught up in her eyes when he felt something hit his shin hard.

"Ow!" he said as he pulled away to rub his leg.

"What happened?" asked Lance.

"I kicked him," Rogue replied smugly. "You'll heard him. He told me to make him."

"Okay that does it," Kitty said. "You two are going on a date."

"I really don't think so," Rogue said.

"Maybe after my leg's healed," Remy said. "Did you have to kick me that hard?"

"Yes," Rogue said with a nod of her head.

"No, I'm with Kitty on this one," Tabitha said gleefully. "It's about time you two stopped fooling around –"

"Stopped or started?" Lance interrupted with a smirk.

"- and actually got together," she finished.

"I agree," Kitty said, and then looked at the studio audience. "Who else agrees?"

There were a handful of boos mixed in with the otherwise overwhelming cheer of support.

"I'm with whoever booed," Rogue said, looking at the audience. "Oh... you're the girls who want Remy to marry you'll, huh? Hey, Remy, you into polygamy?"

"There's an easy way out o' this, chére," Remy said calmly. "Do you have a brother?"

Rogue laughed.

"Actually," she said with a smirk, "I don't mind admitting I have two. Oh, and they're both older brothers too."

"Wow, this is our day for Gothic Romance secrets to come out," Tabitha said.

"So it would seem."

"Two older brothers?" Remy said with an exaggerated wince. "Well, I'm definitely going to have to pass on that one, chére."

"What, why?" Kitty asked. "What difference does Rogue having a brother make?"

"Bella Donna's brother is doing time because he tried to murder me," Remy pointed out. "I never did anything wrong by Bella Donna; he just decided he didn't like me. You'll excuse me if I don't care to repeat the experience."

"Yeah, and with two brothers that might make next time completely dead instead of almost, right?" Lance offered with a grin.

"Exactly," Remy agreed.

"Not helping," Kitty informed him, then turned on Remy. "And you're just making excuses."

"Says the one who hasn't been the victim of attempted murder," Remy replied smugly.

"He did tell you'll he was going to milk that for all it's worth," Rogue pointed out. "And for once it's worked out in my favour. Hurrah."

Remy chuckled.

"So, Rogue," Tabitha asked slyly, "what are the names of your brothers?"

"That's not important," Rogue dismissed.

"Oh right," Kitty said, catching onto where Tabitha was going with this. "Do you at least have a photo of them?"

"Not on me," Rogue replied. "Not that I would let you see it if I did."

"Right, so you might not have any brothers at all," Tabitha said smugly. "In fact, you might be making that up just to get out of going out on a date."

"I don't have to make anything up," Rogue said calmly. "You'll can't make us date. End of discussion. Now, back to The Brotherhood, I believe that Dazzler have the first leg of the tour. Of course, this isn't really much of a surprise as Lorna Dane is Erik Lehnsherr's - Magneto's - daughter. Incidentally, I think there's been... umm, six children between them or something? Lorna's the only one we know about anyway. It'll be the first time The Brotherhood and Dazzler have ever performed together so it should be exciting."

"Wait," Kitty said and turned to Remy. "If Lorna is Magneto's daughter, and you slept with all four members of Dazzler..."

"I don't know whether I'm excited about meeting Magneto or terrified," Remy said with a grin. "They still asked us to tour with them, though, even after the song came out so I'm hoping that that's a good sign and not a plot to kill me for showing his daughter a good time. Plus, Magneto's the lead singer o' his band too, so, that's got to count for something, right?"

Rogue couldn't help herself: "Lorna has a half-brother, by the way."

"I am so screwed," Remy said.

Rogue laughed.

"He's a womaniser too, actually," she said. "Although I think what you should really be worried about is the fact that he's been trying to get into Ali's, Spiral's and Domino's pants for years with no success. He might just stab you out of jealously."

"You've met Lorna's brother?" Remy asked.

"Uh huh, although I'm not entirely sure that's a good thing," Rogue joked.

"What does Lorna's brother do?" Tabitha asked curiously.

"What makes you think I know?" Rogue asked. "Gothic Romance aren't the only ones who keep secrets, you know. Besides, even if I did know, why should I tell anyone? Next thing you know, he's getting a bunch of people harassing him to get them his father's or his sister's autograph or whatever."

"Is that why Gothic Romance doesn't tell anyone about their personal lives?" Lance asked. "Because you're all related to famous people?"

Rogue laughed.

"No," she said with a grin. "No, we are definitely not all related to famous people. Interesting theory though. It's right up there with the theory that our parents are a bunch of terrorists and we're afraid of being publicly associated with them in case anyone decides to target us in retribution. That one makes me laugh."

"Terrorists?" Kitty repeated. "Okay that sounds a little farfetched."

"There are also ones about aliens, androids, clones and shapeshifters," Rogue went on merrily. "The shapeshifter theory seems to be a favourite on account of some of the, ahem, disappearing acts we pull."

"Well, we all have our disappearing acts," Kitty dismissed.

"Some are better at it than others," Lance teased her.

"And as much as I'd love to continue this discussion," Tabitha said, "I'm being frantically signalled that it's time for commercials. So, we'll be right back after this break."

Remy chuckled as they went to the break.

"The trouble with being on Live TV?" he asked.

"Something like," Tabitha agreed.

After the show came to a close, the talent got up from the table and headed backstage to their respective dressing rooms. Tabitha thanked them all again for coming on the show. Somehow in the walking, Remy managed to wind his way over to Rogue and rest his hand on the small of her back.

"So chére," he said before she could object to his hand placement, "got any plans tomorrow night?"

"I'm washing my hair," she deadpanned.

"Because I was wondering if you might like to go out to dinner with me," he went on like she hadn't said anything.

"Are you asking her out on a date?" asked Kitty gleefully from behind. "I thought you were deterred by brothers."

"If you don't mind," Remy replied coolly, "we're having a private conversation. And unlike some people, I don't think that trying to match-make people on live television is appropriate behaviour."

Rogue snickered.

"Besides," Rogue said with a smirk, "I thought you'll decided I was lying about having brothers. Sure Remy. I think I could reschedule my hair washing."

"Bon. Pick you up at six?" he asked they approached Rogue's dressing room.

"I think I should pick you up," Rogue replied. "I'm staying at home at the moment and that's not an address I'm inclined to give out."

Remy conceded and told her which hotel he was staying at. They arranged to meet in the foyer and exchanged phone numbers just in case.

"You ride a motorcycle, right?" she asked.

"Oui."

"Do you happen to have your helmet?"

"Non."

"Well, I guess I'll just have to bring up my spare," she said. "See you tomorrow."

Remy took her hand and kissed it while Rogue opened her door.

"Until then," he confirmed.