Chapter Two!!! Took a while, yes…

Cloud sat on the pavement in Wall Street, biting his nails in order to clean and shorten them. The days had dragged by recently, and in his line of work he hadn't had a client for a while. He sighed deeply and looked around; no one in sight. He decided to pack in for the night and go for a drink or something at the local bar; maybe he could find a client there.

Cloud looked up at the sign above the door: Seventh Heaven. It was some bar in a sector he had found, but he didn't realise it was there before. Pushing the door open he walked inside sexily. Dressed in a red plastic boob-tube with matching mini-skirt, fishnet stocking and high heeled red boots Cloud did get a few glances. You see, Cloud was a prostitute. After leaving Soldier work had sort of dried up for him and this was the only way he could make ends meet. As soon as he had sat down and ordered a drink he realised what kind of bar this was; it was a strip bar. Cloud drank his drink angrily; 'So this is what has been drying up my business.'

Cloud decided to stick around for a while instead of storming out, just to see his competition. An hour had passed by and Cloud had drank three glasses of wine and smoked fifty one cigarettes. He had been chatted up a few times by some blokes who lurked in the corner, but just when he was about to strike a deal with one of them, 'Hi, doll. My name's Vincent..', the lights went dark in the bar and the stage lit up, ready to show off the dancers.

Two women came on stage, one of them was asian and wore short hotpants and a bra and the other had long, dark hair and wore knuckle dusters; the long, darked hair woman had massive breasts, which had to be fake. Cloud watched them for a while as they attempted to dance sexily around stage, but to him they just looked constipated. He knew now, as he saw them snogging each other on stage and catching pound notes off of the floor that this competition would be difficult to overcome. He would most certainly have to do something in order to get his own business back, and that something seemed like getting rid of this act, including the bar.

Cloud went outside of Seventh Heaven and got his mobile phone out of his handbag. Ringing his pimp he explained the situation and awaited their arrival. Twenty minutes later a limo pulled up outside and a large black bloke popped out of it... it was Cloud's pimp, Barret. A few seconds later Barret's boyfriend Cid came out too. He was a middle-aged bloke with blonde hair and a chewed up cigarette hanging outside of his gob.

"Heya, sweetie." Barret said, kissing Cloud on the cheek. Cid simply nodded his head and continued to swig the beer in his hand.

"Hey, Barret. Listen, this lesbian show has really got my business stunted. I can't pull for love nor money. We've got to do something, you know! Otherwise you're going to start to lose money fast. It's been a few days since I've had a shag! It's amazing that I found this place, otherwise I would never have found the bloody problem."

"Dun worry, Cloud; I'll fix it good!" Barret exclaimed, arming his gun-arm. Cloud grabbed Barret's arm in dismay.

"No! You can't! If you go in there and shoot them dead we'll get bloody arrested! No shags or money then." Cloud whispered. Barret grunted angrily; he loved using his gun, but he was smart enough to know Cloud was right. Cloud, Cid and Barret popped into the limo and drove away, drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes as they debated how to sort out this matter.

In Barret's House...

The sunlight shone through the eastern window of Barret's room as he slowly opened his eyes. Sitting up in his bed he brushed away the cigarette ash in his beard and lit one up, pulling the covers away from him as he did so. Cid, next to him, half-asleep, complained and pushed Barret away, pulling the sheets back onto himself. Barret stood up in a sleepy daze and walked towards the bathroom to brush his teeth, only to trip over Cloud, who was sleeping on the floor.

"Damn, man!" Barret shouted, falling to the floor. He kicked Cloud, who was lying on the floor, asleep in a sleeping bag, as he picked himself up. "Why are you there?!"

"Ugh... ah.. Barret.. don't you remember?" Cloud slurred, rubbing his eyes as he sat up. "I couldn't find anyone to crash with last night. You know... that lesbian show?"

Barret racked his brains to remember; he had drank so much last night it was mostly a blur, but he recalled the trouble they had all been having with that new show at the Seventh Heaven.

They all sat around the breakfast table, Cid, Barret and Cloud, thinking of a way they could stop the show that stopped their income.

"I know!" Cid exclaimed. "We could murder them." Cloud shook his head.

"Nope, the bobbies are already suspicious about Aeris' murder."

"Shite. Oh, well..."

"Wait!" Barret shouted, standing up for effect. "It's a lesbian show, right?!"

"Yeah..." Cloud replied. "So..?"

"Well," Barret continued, "it wouldn't be a lesbian show if they were both blokes, right?"

"Uh, Barret." Cid sighed. "What are you talking 'bout?"

"Well..." Barret started to say. He sat down at the table, drew Cid and Cloud near and begun to whisper quickly into their eyes, so that no one might hear his plan...

That evening...

Cid, Cloud and Barret stood outside Seventh Heaven. Cloud, much to his annoyance, wore a black cocktail dress and falsies. They both ushered him inside the bar as they waited inside the limo. Cloud walked up to the stage, waiting for the show to begin; the plan was to go ahead tonight. Ignoring drunken come ons by some of the blokes in the bar the show started, and everyone's attention was focused upon the two birds dancing with almost no clothes on. Cloud later found out their names: Tifa and Yuffie. The show was quite good; Tifa stripped down the nothing as Yuffie bathed her in lotion and snogged her deeply whilst some cheap tart music played in the background.

After the show had finished, Cloud used his sexy demure to enter backstage.

"I want to see them!" Cloud protested. The manager of the bar, Cait Sith, repeatedly denied him access until Cloud agreed to some foreplay. After finishing up on Cait Sith outside on top of a dumpster, he entered the club through the back way and went inside the dressing room where Tifa and Yuffie were getting changed for their next act: ping pong tennis.

"Hello, ladies.." Cloud laughed.

"Who are you?!" Tifa shouted, standing up and pointing at the door. "Get out!"

"Calm down, Tifa. I was sent by a 'friend' to alleviate any stress you might have."

Tifa sat down and sighed in relief.

"Thank God," she exclaimed. "I've been doing this for ages and needed some 'relief'."

Tifa and Yuffie giggled as they slid off their tops and sat down whilst Cloud prepared to give them an erotic massage. He rubbed lotion upon his hands and started with Tifa, massaging her back sensually.

"Lower.." she exclaimed. His hands went lower. "Lower, lower!" His hands went even more lower, until he was nearly rubbing her arse.

"Hey, Tifa, let me try too!" Yuffie shouted. Cloud started on Yuffie as Tifa moaned in ecstacy.

Cloud was getting bloody bored by now so simply took out the tranquiliser and put it in their drinks whilst their eyes were closed in pleasure. A few minutes later they were both out cold, and with the help of Cid, whom was waiting outside, they stuffed them into the limo.

In Barret's house...

"What are you doing?!" Yuffie shouted. She and Tifa were tied up in Barret's basement, fully dressed and just coming out of their drugged state.

"Ahahaha..." Barret cackled. He took out a syringe and got Cid to hold Tifa down as he injected it into her arm.

"Nooo!!!" Tifa screamed. A few minutes later Tifa and Yuffie felt funny; their faces and bodies were starting to itch. A few more minutes later they discovered body hair was rapidly growing all over them!

"What have you done?!" Yuffie screamed, as she spat in Cid's face. Cid wiped the spit away and explained about male hormones being injected into them.

The nights passed by quickly, and with Yuffie and Tifa looking like men with think body hair and beards trying to rake in the cash by stripping but failing, Cloud did all right for himself as he acted like a complete slag on the streets. Men were slipping pound coins in his purse all night as he shagged them diligently and expressed his thanks. Barret and Cid were finally back on track with the cut they received and everyone was happy. Except for Tifa and Yuffie that is.

Fin