How To Amuse Yourself at the Akatsuki's Expense

by Sadistic Kunoichi-13

lists of ways to bother Itachi Kisame Hidan Deidara Sasori Pein Konan Zetsu Kakuzu and maybe Tobi. On temporary hold due to... well, attempting to get on the honor roll at school for funsies. UPDATED! KAKUZU'S CHAPTER UP! Yeah I made it. Barely.

2. Kisame

How To Amuse Yourself at Kisame's Expense

1. Follow him around quoting Moby Dick, Jaws, and Finding Nemo for a week

2. Ask him how big his sword is. When he tells you, look skeptically at his crotch until he gets it, then run to Pein for protection.

3. Throw rainbow goldfish crackers at him

4. Feed him shark fin soup without telling him what it is

5. Tell him what it is. Run back to Pein when he yells mournfully, "Uncle Joe!!!"

6. Randomly spray him with the garden hose. When he yells at you, indignantly yell, "I just saved your life, and this is the thanks I get!"

7. Hang a fishhook with a sake bottle tied to it in front of his door and wait for him to come out.

8. Swing the fish hook until it catches on his mouth as he curses at you, then reel it in while singing, "I'm blue, dabadi, dabada~!"

9. On Christmas, blindfold him and tell him that his gift is a surprise and that you'll lead him to it. Take him to the giant fish bowl you had erected and filled with water in his honor.

10. Push him off the diving board on the side of it while he's still blindfolded.

11. Buy a pet fish and name it after him

12. Give him an embarrassing nickname and call him that in front of Pein and Itachi, and also in public

13. Henge into Itachi with a big kitchen knife. Walk into the room behind Kisame and say, "Who's up for sushi?"

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Sorry I haven't updated in forever, but I was trying to come up with more ideas at first, and then I forgot which notebook it was in, so yeah. . . I hope this is good! Next up, I'm thinking either Hidan or Kakuzu. Until then, Ja ne!