It's been 8 weeks since Bernie joined Holby City and things were just about getting back to normal. Well what was normal she really didn't know after spending so much time in the army over the years. But her relationship with Marcus was getting better and she had tried her best not to think about Alex. Alex hadn't contacted Bernie once since she had phoned her to say she wouldn't be back. That hurt a lot but she had to be adult about this and give up any hope of seeing her again.
It was a cold day in April, Bernie got out of her car at the hospital and was yelling down the phone at her son, when Serena came by. Bernie was in two minds about seeing Serena again, it had been over 5 weeks since the last time they had chatted. Her mind said don't talk to her, life is getting better with Marcus and she didn't really need another woman. But yet again her heart was telling her another story. Her heart was beating really fast yet again. she sighed, Get a grip Bernie thought you can chat to another woman without falling for them. They started chatting about how Bernie wasn't really a maternal person, Being away in the Army had been mostly to blame for that. She tried her best with her children when she was at home but it didn't always seem enough. Now she had left the army she was trying to get that relationship back with her children, It was going to take time, She was getting further with Cameron than with Charlotte, She seem more the Daddy's girl. it was like Bernie was a stranger to her and Bernie couldn't blame her for that. They walked into the hospital together and went their separate ways.
Bernie was working on Keller with Dr Copland and Dr Digby when she was paged to go to the scanning room to help out. Bernie wondered why she was being called away from Keller. She walked down the corridor and entered the scanning room. Bernie was asking Dr Copeland why she had been paged and what this was all about. But he didn't have a clue what was going on, As he had been paged as well. Then all of a sudden a firmilar voice came from behind her. Bernie's heart stopped for a second she know that voice anywhere. It was Alex Dawson, Alex from the army the one she fell for, the one shes been trying to get out of her mind ever since. loads of questions went round in her head. But foremost she was angry how dare she be dumped over the phone and then rub salt in the wound by coming to work at the same hospital as her. Bernie turned round to see Alex standing there with a small grin on her face. Seeing Alex after all this time awakened so many feelings inside of her she thought she'd managed to bury. Her mind was racing at 100 miles an hour as Alex was explaining about the patient she had in the scanner. Bernie was thinking all sorts, but she was trying to be calm about it all. She tried so hard not to show any of those feelings and to act professional about it all. Do the job in hand and get out of there. But at the same time she was so mad how dare she come back after all this time. Life was beginning to get better again, with Alex and the army behind her. Who was she kidding life wasn't that great, in the past few weeks she has become even more distant with Marcus. In her mind she would love nothing more than to leave Marcus and run away with Alex. But there was the little matter that no one even knew she was gay, she'd lived the last 20 odd years as a lie, lying to herself and lying to others.
Just then there was a problem with their patient and they rushed to help him. While they was working to save their patient, Bernie's heart was racing. She couldn't help but feel something, the old magic spark between them, like when they worked on the front line together. After managing to stabilize their patient, Alex proclaimed it was just like old times. Bernie thought for a moment, i can't let this happen i can't slip back into old habits. she quickly walked out of the scanning room. Her head was thinking one thing but her heart was feeling another and it wasn't right. This was all too confusing for her and she needed space to get her head around it. Ric came in to congratulate them on a great team effort. Alex went onto talk about how they knew each other from the army, and how good Bernie is as a medic. Alex was also explaining how they both got blown up by the same IED and that she pulled Bernie to safety saving her life. Bernie owed her life to Alex, she quite liked Alex being the hero, although she wouldn't admit it. Alex always admired Bernie for the medical skills and was why she paged to help out. Bernie got a bit annoyed that Alex had just told Ric all about her life in the army. Bernie had been at Holby City about 8 weeks now and managed to keep that part of her life hidden, until now that was. She was quick to pull Ric aside and plead her case to get someone else to handle the case and not Alex. How dare she rock up just as i'm getting on with my life. she had got use to life without Alex and the army and now Alex was back she didn't know what to feel anymore messed up wasn't the word