A/N: THANK YOU to the FABULOUS people who reviewed the first chapter. I am pleased that you appreciated it and to those who were complimentary about my characterizations THANK YOU; I'm new to writing BOTH of these characters and to know I am keeping in character is wonderful.

Disclaimers: I own nothing… and therefore cannot afford a Beta. :(

Previously….

For the second time in this conversation I feel my brows come together and my eyes narrow, "What?" He takes a step back from me and turns to leave before turning back and licking his lips. He grips his fists at his side and shrugs, "Well clearly you'd prefer to discuss things with Adam over me." And then I felt my heart stop.


"What are you talking about Mac?"

The words fall from her lips as she shrugs and tilts her head, studying me as if I were a piece of contradicting evidence in her precise theory. "Adam? This is about Adam?"

She raises her eyebrows slightly and leans her head forward, fishing for me to answer her. After a couple moments of silence pass between us with her staring expectantly at me and me only being able to stare back with no good answer to the question, she opens her hands at her sides and gestures that she's waiting. "Sometime today, Mac."

I swallow and open my mouth to speak, wanting to berate her and yell and scream and tell her how wrong it is, tell her how it is against protocol; but I can't. Lindsay and Danny are doing it; and more importantly, Peyton and I were guilty of breaking protocol as well. My lips close and the best I can offer is a nod as I scratch my cheek and shrug.

"Oh come on, Mac. Are you that…" she closes her eyes and I see her scanning her mind for the perfect word, a trait that becomes more and more endearing as the years go on. Her eyes open and I see a flicker of intensity that was not present a few moments ago, "Are you that threatened that you can't even speak to me?"

Threatened. Of all the possible words that could describe this emotion, threatened would've been one of the last that I could've come up with; but she knows me. She can see through anything I throw at her and I know that she can sense that I am getting territorial over her. For years, she and I have had this unique dynamic that's always been a complicated mix of friendship, flirting, support, confidence and devotion. Her private life has been my territory for years and she knew that I was threatened by the thought of Adam taking that away from me. She studies me for a moment longer and sighs, "Mac, I don't know what you want me to tell you. I don't know what you're expecting from me. Jess' death has been hard on all of us. This case has been hard on all of us. If you want to stay silent and strong and keep your emotions and needs at bay, that's your choice."

She nods and takes a step towards me, her head turning slightly side to side with tendrils following the movements in soft bounces, "But you need to remember that your team has lives outside of the lab that were compromised by this. You need to open your eyes and see what's going on around you; Lindsay and Danny struggling with a newborn and the new obstacle with Danny's chair…"

She begins to slowly and steadily advance towards me and I feel the walls getting closer, "Sheldon and how he's clearly working himself into the ground between work and volunteering, Flack and how he's doing the exact same damn thing you did when it was Claire, and me."

She whispers the last word as she finishes her approach and stands in front of me. Our bodies can't be more than 6 inches apart and I can see every fleck of gold in those light green eyes.

He's silent again, actually if I want to be honest he's been silent for a while. Maybe that's good though, because he needs to hear this and if I have to be the one to tell him, then I will. I'm not quite sure why I put my hand on his cheek, but as his head tilts into my palm I suddenly feel the need to tell him everything that I'm feeling and everything that I've been holding in.

"I can't just shut myself off. I'm not you. I can't act as though this hasn't taken a toll on me. First Jess, then Danny, and now you…" my thumb traces his cheekbone as the next words tumble unconsciously from my lips, "I think you're the one that hurts most."

His eyes narrow and before I can continue he presses his fingertips to my lips, "I'm still here Stel. You know that. You've always known that. When have you needed an invitation to seek me out for anything?"

His eyebrows raise as he teases me and I feel the corners of my mouth betray me as they curl upwards. His fingers leave my lips and I feel my body mourn the contact but am comforted as his hands find my waist.

"Mac, I've never felt like you were so far away. We all feel like there's a distance there and, after awhile, I think we all just gave up."

I lick my lips and gather my courage, "Mac, I know you're going to come around and I know that no one can rush you through this, but the world is still spinning and life has gone on, whether you like it or not. We have all continued to live our lives and yes, for some of us changes and mistakes have been made, without you."

I drop my eyes and feel his hands slide from my body. "Adam."

The name is murmured under his breath and I watch as he grips his pant leg for a moment and then takes a step back, his posterior impacting the fridge lightly, "You… and Adam."

My eyes lift to him and this time I'm the silent one, offering a weak nod and shrug as I confirm his thoughts, "Once. It…" I take a deep breath and know that I have to fess up to the deed here and now and accept whatever reaction Mac has, "A week after Jess, I got a call from him. He was at a bar, feeling lonely, and quite frankly the offer was the best I'd had in quite awhile. We talked and…" I laugh softly as I open my palms to Mac, "Who knew we actually knew so little about him? After a few drinks, we went for a walk and one thing lead to another…" His eyes slipped close as he leaned his head back against the fridge and mutterd something softly under his breath before he lifted his head and stared at me.

"Mac, it was stupid and spontaneous. It definitely is not going to happen again." She's speaking to me but I can't focus on the words, not as my mind plays images in slow motion of her and Adam alone in a room doing things that I'm sure he's dreamt of doing since he met her; things every man who knows her dreams of doing with and to her. Images flicker through my mind at wrap speed; thoughts of her wrapped around him, his name being murmured by her; thoughts of how he'd never be able to realize how lucky he was to get to have each second of that with her, and how jealous I was that I'd only ever get to have thoughts of the images and never a memory.

I grit my jaw and sigh as my mind begins to focus on the words she's expressing, "I don't want our lab to become something off daytime television. Not every person in the lab has to be in love with someone else at the lab and I certainly don't plan on allowing Adam and I to ever become more than what we are now."

My head tilts as I study her, "And what are you two now?"

Her head mirrors mine as she smiles, "We're friends; friends who were there to comfort each other, even if the methodology was flawed."

"Flawed?"

His lips curl slightly upward as a single eyebrow rises and I can't help but to purse my lips and cross my arms over my chest, "It's not like we were the first people to ever find comfort in sex Mac."

His eyes close as he groans and runs a hand over his face, "You couldn't have done it with anyone other than Adam, Stella? He's half your age!"

Before I can even react his face flushes and his eyes widen, and I can't help but laugh and roll my eyes, "And who would you have found acceptable for me to call for that sort of comfort Taylor?"

His eyes soften as he crosses his arms over his chest and shrugs nonchalantly, "Me?"

He gets that damn smug smile on his face and I can't help but to smirk and raise an eyebrow, "I contemplated that but you were preoccupied with your evidence."

If it's possible that grin gets smugger and I almost want to go over and smack it off the bastard's face, until he speaks, "I'm not preoccupied now." And then I felt the earth stop spinning.