Chapter 2

After my first visit to the Hatake household I returned many times, celebrating my second birthday with the small family and seeing them before the new year's celebrations. When I visited in June the following year I was let in on a fact that would have blown my mind if not for the fact that I already knew about it. But it still amazed feat me none the less.

"You're going to the Academy already? But you're only four!" I knew Kakashi entered and completed the Academy young, but the fact that he was four and he was going to enter the Academy to start his ninja career did seem a bit much. "I'm gonna have to ask Okaa-san or Ichi-Oji to start training so that I can go to the Academy too."

I didn't really want to be a ninja. I couldn't be one Before, I never wanted to be any type of fighter, but being strong enough, powerful enough to look after myself and others was important to me, especially in this world where civilians are just unfortunate casualties. I didn't think I could ever kill someone, but that didn't mean that being a support ninja wasn't beyond me, or being more Village based, which would be a perfect position if I wanted the change to influence the inner workings of the Village.

"Does everyone enter the Academy so young?" Four seemed quite young to make choices about the future, and in the manga, Kakashi seemed like he was only a ninja because that was what everyone said he should do. Though I couldn't imagine Kakashi as much else. Maybe a dog-sitter, or a beta reader for Jiraiya's porn.

"Well~. I've been teaching my Little Scarecrow for a while now, so he's ready for the Academy. And children normally enter the Academy at about five during war time, so Kashi isn't entering that early compared to others." Sakumo said messing Kakashi hair, causing the young Hatake to glare up at his father.

"Ne, Kakashi-kun, why are you wearing a mask?" I poked his cheek, pinching the material between my fingers and stretching it, Kakashi had taken to wearing a scarf across his face when his enhanced sense of smell came in, but the arrival of a proper mask under said scarf was new. My hand was swatted away by the irritated four-year-old. "Is it because you're too cute? Because I poked your beauty spot like a button? Because I made a point of touching your fangs?" I kept trying to pull off the mask with each question, but it almost seemed to be glued in place. I could see that Kakashi was getting deader in his eyes as I kept annoying him. I'm convinced that if we were older there would be a vein throbbing on his forehead.

"Are all girls like you?" Kakashi deadpanned. "And they're not fangs, they're canines, just sharper. Otou-san has the same teeth too." I could hear Sakumo-san laughing from the kitchen where he was preparing some snacks for the afternoon. I found out the Sakumo-san couldn't cook, at all. All the snacks he made were the premade kind, where all he had to do was throw them in the oven. The first time I experienced Sakumo-san trying to cook I had to run away for fear of smoke inhalation.

"No Kakashi-kun. I'm just special." I flashed him a smile, trying to be all cutesy, trying to abuse how cute I was as a toddler."But if girls bother you so much I'll focus on finding you a boyfriend in the future."

"Are you still focused on that?" Kakashi raised an eyebrow at me. Making his way around to lay the table.

"I'll let it slide for now if you tell me about your time at the Academy. Have you made any friends yet? Are there any cute people in your class? Is your teacher nice? Are there any interesting people?" I was rushing through questions, knowing that Kakashi would answer them all for fear that I would pester him about any that he didn't answer.

"Maa. Class is alright. I haven't made any friends yet, but I don't need them. I'm not sure about cute people, what makes a person cute? Hirono-sensei is alright, I couldn't tell you much about him yet. I don't know if anyone is interesting. I don't really talk to many of the people in my class. I'll probably know more about some of them in the next few weeks. There was this one kid who was late to the entrance ceremony and cried." Poor, poor Obito.

"Are you looking forward to being a ninja one day?"

"I guess." He shrugged. It's moment like this I hated how indifferent Kakashi could be, he didn't mean to be, but he just had this expectation that everyone viewed the world the way he did and couldn't always understand that most people didn't, but I'd teach him better over time. He returned to the low table in the living room to continue his homework ignoring my glare at his apathetic response.

It was three months later that we celebrated both Kakashi's and Sakumo's birthdays. Unfortunately, Sakumo was on a mission for his, but he was back in time for Kakashi's, so we extra special effort was put in for Kakashi. Technically it was a joint party but Sakumo never let the attention stay on him for too long, being the doting father that he was, he tried to make sure that Kakashi was getting all the attention that he thought his son deserved.

I helped my Tou-san bake the cake for the party, which meant that he let me help with the icing, which really meant that I got to lick the spoon when he was done and throw some edible glitter onto the top because even with a twenty-six-year-old mind I decided all children needed to have sparkles, and the sadistic part of my brain decided that if I had to have suffered the annoyance of glitter once Before, everyone gets to suffer with me now. Plus, people normally only turned five once, unless they're me.

Fun fact, turns out that Kakashi HATES glitter, as he told me much later after his birthday. Sakumo had been amused about finding glitter on his things days after the party and even after all his clothes had been washed, Kakashi however felt that he would rather stab his eyes with blunt kunai than see another spec of glitter again. After that interesting conversation I decided that I would one day glitter bomb Kakashi, preferably with something obvious and hard to wash out, just to be cruel.

It was a fun party, despite being basically all actual adults except for me and Kakashi. I thought I saw a young Gai for a moment, but I couldn't be sure, but I know I definitely saw someone in a green jumpsuit. My family got Sakumo some easy cookbooks, apparently, he had always been a horrid cook according to Okaa-san, and a whetstone to sharpen his swords and kunai. For Kakashi we got him some kunai and some chakra control scrolls, he seemed pleases with it, but it's hard to tell with the indifferent prick and his face covering mask, at least he hadn't learnt how to hide emotions from his eyes yet.

My family excused themselves when the sake started being passed around, probably to keep me from seeing a load of people drunk, and I imagine the drunk shinobi is quite a sight, but little did my parents know that I spent my previous life growing up in Britain, and binge drinking was a part of our culture, for some reason that no one had ever explained to me. I didn't mind leaving, being physically two was exhausting, I said my goodbyes to Sakumo and Kakashi, promising that I'd be back soon and that Kakashi had better have more stories about the academy, or really any.

The next time I came to visit the Hatake household I was dropped off in a rush. I don't know why I was left in such a rush. I wasn't sure I liked the fact that I had to be dropped off randomly at other houses instead of left on my own for any period of time, but I'd admit that I was glad that I wasn't being treated like a full adult, my small body didn't really accommodate the tasks that looking after one's self-required. I had been taught to be independent in my last life from a young age, but two turning three was a bit young to be worrying about any of that. Thought I might have to take over cooking for the Hatakes if the black mush I was looking at was anything to go by. It definitely not fit for human consumption.

"What is it supposed to be Sakumo-san?" I poked the mush, worried that it might move if I poked it just right. Looking across the table to Kakashi told me that this kind of meal was something he was entirely too used to.

"Eh, haha~. It's meant to be a vegetable curry." Sakumo-san rubbed the back of his head, his face going red with embarrassment. Decidedly not looking at the pile of wet ash he tried to pass off as a meal.

"You can't cook Sakumo-san." I deadpanned, looking thoroughly unimpressed with the meal. "Okaa-san cooks better than you." Which is definitely an insult, Okaa-san wasn't a housewife by any means. All the house jobs were left to Tou-san.

"Sayuri-chan! Blasphemy! Impudent child!" Sakumo-san cried, he was quite an overdramatic man when inside his own home, he was prone to heavy sarcasm and dramatic fits when he was comfortable around someone, it made me wonder if that was why Kakashi tried to act as 'normal' as possible, to make up for his dad's 'weirdness'. He moved around the table to grab me and held me close to his chest.

"You are so mean to me Sayuri-chan. You must now suffer a suffocating hug." I must admit to feeling slight guilt towards Kakashi now, this was annoying and I had no way to get out. The hug reminded me of when I used to annoy my mum and we would make up but she had to have the last word and would squeeze me just a bit too tight and wouldn't let me go until she felt she was done.

"Kakashi-kun! Save me!" I tried to squirm out of Sakumo grasp.

"No."

"Kakashi-kun~!"

"No. Suffer."

"Bakashi-teme!"

"Such language Sayuri-chan." Sakumo-san admonished me, squeezing me a little bit tighter. "Where did you learn such things?"

"Ichiro-Oji." I had no shame throwing my uncle the metaphorical bus, he had laughed when I asked why he was still single and didn't give me an explanation when I pushed further for an answer. My dear Ichi-Oji was a good-looking, successful shinobi, why wouldn't I be curious as to why he was still single, so how dare he not satisfy my childish curiosity. "He said that there is something called a 'pervy-teme' that he sometimes works with. And that if I ever see a large white-haired man I should go the other way so that I don't become tainted with its perverseness."

Before that conversation with dear Ichi-Oji I never realised that my uncle was the same age as the Sannin, it kind of blew my mind, I always imagined the Sannin as people who were grandparent age, not as people that my family might know and work with, but it did make sense, as Jiraiya is said to be in his fifties by the future chunin exams, and those are a good twenty years away.

"Oh. Are you sure that you should be hanging out with me then Sayuri-chan?" Sakumo teased as he rubbed chin across the top of my head, messing up my hair.

"You have grey hair. Not white."

"Hey, it's silver. And Kashi-chan has the same hair." Sakumo turned us around so that I could face Kakashi who was looking at us with a dazed glance.

"No. It's grey, like an old mans." I giggled, enjoying the small glare that Kakashi was now giving me, I couldn't see Sakumo-sans face but I can imagine that he was glaring at me too. "Do you know who Ichi-Oji was talking about?" If Jiraiya was the same age as my uncle then he had to be a similar age to Sakumo-san. And Sakumo-san was an extraordinary shinobi, so it wasn't a large stretch of the imagination to think that they've worked together at some point.

"I fought alongside a man with white hair during the war. He's a very strong shinobi and a master spy, but your uncle is right, he does have a habit of peeping into the women's side of the onsen." Sakumo chuckled nervously at this, I can only imagine what he was thinking in regards to the Great Toad Sage.

"There was a war?" I honestly didn't know the timeline for the wars as well as I wished I did, I didn't know how long the time of peace was and I only had a vague idea of how and when the third war started.

"Yes, Sayuri-chan. In fact, it only finished recently, the Kages are currently meeting to agree on the terms of peace. The Village will stay in war-time operations for the next year, and then we'll transition back into peace-time status."

"Isn't your Okaa-san a kunoichi? Shouldn't she have told you about the war?" Thank you Kakashi for your skills of observation.

"Okaa-san has been going on lots of missions, I haven't seen her in a long time, and Tou-san doesn't like talking about ninja stuff." Which was true, more specifically, he doesn't like talking about what Okaa-san what does. Tou-san will grumble to himself and quickly change the subject, I had a sneaking suspicion that she's either in the Seduction Corps, a member of ANBU, or a part of an infiltration team.

Those seemed like the three divisions that were most likely to keep to themselves.

The rest of my time spent in the Hatake household on that November day was more subdued.

I didn't see Kakashi or Sakumo again until my third birthday. It was a mild day for December, it wasn't raining, or particularly cold, just overcast. Tou-san invited a lot of his friends and their kids, if they had any. I got to meet the famous Ino-Shika-Chou trio from across two generations. I was super jealous of Inoichi's hair, it was so long and pretty, exactly the type of hair I would have wished for Before, and I forced him, as well as a three-year-old can force a thirteen-year-old to do anything, to do my hair. He did it up into a pretty bun, I thanked him with a childish kiss on the cheek, enjoying the way that the young blond flushed red and cheekily grinning as his two teammates snickered at him.

"Look Jirou, young romance." The elder Yamanaka said, pointing towards me with the boys, where Inoichi was wiping his face complaining about children carrying illnesses, and not knowing where I had been.

"No~! He's too pretty. 'Gonna marry a strong man like Tou-san." I whined childishly, running up to Tou-san and hugging his legs. I didn't like pretty boys romantically in the last life and I still don't like them now, they just didn't appeal to me or my current lack of hormones. Plus, the offended look on Inoichi's face made the comment worth it. Young men don't like being called pretty, and seeing him whine to his teammates and long-time friends that he 'was a strong, handsome man dammit' was hilarious.

"Yeah, my smart little Sayu-chan will knows to only marry a man strong enough to protect her from pretty boys." Tou-san teased, placing his hand on my head, but not musing my hair, he knew what would happen if he messed up my neat new bun.

Tou-san definitely wasn't what I would call a 'pretty' man. With hard eyes, slanted eyebrows, a strong, square jaw with constant stubble, my Tou-san had a rugged handsomeness that I could see attracting a pretty woman like my Okaa-san. His dark brown, mid-length hair was tied back at the nape of his neck with a simple ribbon, the long hair didn't soften his face, but seemed to emphasize the roughness of it instead. No, it was his easy smile and beaming personality that made my Tou-san able to make friends with nearly anyone he met. His being a civilian did little to impair his interactions with the ninja half of the Village.

Deciding to continue to milk my second childhood for all it's worth wandered over to the Akimichi's in the room and tugged on the Elder Akimichi's trouser leg.

"Ne, Jii-san, how do you know Tou-san?" How did a ninja clan head know a simple merchant?

"Well Sayuri-chan, your Otou-san here is the head of a merchant clan that specialises in metal and wood trade here in the Land of Fire, with your branch family handling the metal trade in the Land of Wind, and he's trying to see about expanding to food trade for the Land of Wind, as the desert doesn't make it easy to grow most crops. The Akimichi clan, as well as being a ninja clan, also have lots of contracts with food merchants that supply our restaurants, so your Otou-san has been meeting with my clan to agree on how to provide food to Wind."

"Tou-san is a clan head?!" How was I not made aware of this? I knew that we were a clan, but technically the Hatake's were a clan, clan basically means any family that has or once had power in some way, shape or form.

"Yes."

"Does that mean that I'm a clan princess?" If so I demand a crown.

"Yes."

"Kakashi-kun you have to listen to what I say now. I'm a princess." Bow down to me future scary ninja, I'm a clan princess. "Are we a large clan Tou-san?"

"I'll be teaching you about the clan soon, but know that most of our clan travels around, going between the mines and forests we own and are currently searching for viable farm lands to expand our trade, as well as travelling with our goods to sell them when needed."

"Cool. Was Okaa-san from the clan too?"

"No, your Okaa-san was originally an Uchiha."

"Whaaa~?" An Uchiha? Really? Would I be able to develop the Sharingan in the future? Maybe I really could be a ninja if I had super ninja magic eyes to help keep me alive.

"Did you never tell poor little Sayuri-chan about her family Jirou?" The elder Nara teased.

"She just turned three! How much did she need to know?" Tou-san grumbled, "The whole history of Konoha? How about the history of the Elemental Nations?" So much sass Tou-san. But honestly, how did I not know I was part of a proper clan and not just a civilian family that was once a clan. I'm totally going to be a princess. "Sayu-chan is smart, but she needs to be a child for a bit before she learns about clan politics and merchant skills." I loved Tou-san more and more every day, and it was moments like these, when he didn't decide to rush me into second adulthood, that reinforced it for me.

"That's fair enough Jirou. Aya and I have only recently introduced Chouza into the clan meetings. We decided that chunin rank was the benchmark we were using." The elder Akimichi nodded to Tou-san, agreeing with his logic.

I found I liked the Akimichi family, they were kind, and Chouza offered me a chip during the party, it was BBQ flavoured. The Yamanaka's were okay, they kept asking questions about how I felt about different things, and what were my thoughts on some obscure concepts, and Inoichi looked at me strangely, he kept flickering between assessing me and wanting to do nothing with me. I knew I didn't talk like a three-year-old but lots of kids were prodigies in this world, Sakumo constantly boasted about how young Kakashi started walking and talking, I wasn't too special in that regard, and if I was the daughter of an Uchiha then I was likely on par for my age.

The Nara's made me laugh, Aikido Nara was a bit of a mother bear type, and definitely the head of her household, Shikai Nara seemed the stereotype Nara, lazy but clearly intelligent, he seemed to regard me as a person regards a particularly intelligent pet. Shikaku Nara , in contrast, with fresh scars marring his face, didn't seem to know what to do with me. Childcare was obviously not a Nara specialisation.

Poor Shikamaru.

The rest of my birthday passed without issue. Our guests left with promises to visit again in the future, though Inoichi seemed reluctant to give such a promise if his tight grin had been anything to go by. Tou-san spent the rest of the evening cleaning up the worst of the mess, but he was clearly leaving things to do in the morning. I had been sent up to my room, and was looking out the window, the cool outside air was causing the glass fog up. The party had been great but it made me remember things I wished I could forget, family gatherings with a family I would never see again. The laughs and jokes and jeers that had echoed around the main room stung as images overlapped of two lives.

For the first time in three years, of one truly conscience year, I fully realised what I had lost. I would never get to see my parents again, never get to banter with my siblings or have deep conversations with my Nan. There would be events and holidays that had no meaning where I was now, and things I'll never get to see. I'd never see Andrew or Mary get married, have kids, settle into their work. I wasn't going to be around to see my parents' anniversaries.

I felt a weight in my gut as my revelation settled. For all that I was lucky in this new life, the cost was high, and I wasn't sure I was worthy of it. I hadn't done anything to deserve this second change, there were probably hundreds of people who died the same day as me that actually deserved to live. Good, honest people, with usable skills. People who could throw themselves into the inner workings of Konoha and try to make a change to the system. Not me. I couldn't do it. I'm not a fighter, or a politician, or anyone really.

I was just Azalea, now I'm just Sayuri.

Just little Sayuri Akiyama, civilian born nobody.

I felt the first tear hit my hand as I turned my face from the window.

I cried silent tears as I went to lay in my bed to sleep. I waited for the cool embrace of sleep to take me to the dark numbness that would occupy me until dawn.